History Creator / ChristopherTitus

--> '''Nazi Girlfriend:''' Yes, that's what happened. But [[InsaneTrollLogic who left their keys on the table so they could not unlock the door]]?

* MoralEventHorizon: Invoked. He started to realize his marriage was falling apart when his wife said "I wish you would [[DrivenToSuicide kill yourself like your mom and your sister did]]." He called it a "switch" moment when he realized that they probably wouldn't be able to work things out.

* JerkWithAHeartOfGold: Ken Titus. A mean bastard but, by God, did he love his kids. See the FunctionalAddict entry above for the lengths he went to in order to provide for them.

* WhiteGuilt: {{Discussed}} twice - once in ''Neverlution'' (see ThatCameOutWrong) and [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/22dird/stand-up-christopher-titus--formal-apology this gem]] from a Creator/ComedyCentral special where he apologizes for Slavery.

** Another notable one would just [[AnnoyingLaugh laugh in a drawn-out manner]], and because he wasn't verbalizing anything, Titus couldn't shut him down. When pressed, he told Titus in a thick Southern accent that he was in the Air Force, to which Titus said "Why? You couldn't get into a real college?" This upset the heckler enough to rush the stage and threaten to beat Titus' ass, which he later did after the show because the audience said they'd beat HIS ass if he attacked Titus on-stage.

-->'''Titus''': I go backstage, it was a little kitchenette 'cause it was a town auditorium. The comedian I'm working with, this guy named Carl Banks, is lying on the floor in front of the stove, curled up in the fetal position, and he is ''shaking'' with laughter. And I go "What the hell is ''your'' problem, man?!" And he goes - (''gasping for air'') "She's ''blind''! [[CrossesTheLineTwice Hahahaha!]] She's blind! Hahahaha! [[NeverLiveItDown You were screaming into the face of a blind woman!]] And she had no idea!"

-->'''Titus''': I go backstage, it was a little kitchenette 'cause it was a town auditorium. The comedian I'm working with, this guy named Carl Banks, is lying on the floor in front of the stove, curled up in the fetal position, and he is ''shaking'' with laughter. And I go "What the hell is ''your'' problem, man?!" And he goes - (''gasping for air'') "She's ''blind''! [[CrossesTheLineTwice Hahahaha!]] She's blind! Hahahaha! [[NeverLiveItDown You were screaming into the face of a blind woman!]] And she had no idea!"]]

* AmicablyDivorced: Averted. He is ''not'' on good terms with his ex-wife [[note]]Who lied in court saying that Christopher abused her and the kids just so she could sidestep the California "no-fault" divorce laws, which only allows for non-equal splitting of assets if someone claims domestic abuse. It was later found to be false.[[/note]], and he has doubts that such a thing is really possible. In ''Neverlution'', he reveals that his divorce took five years to finalize and his ex-wife walked away with $2 million dollars in alimony and shared custody of the kids.

* CombatSadomasochist: [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LZNe10q0reA While one of his psycho girlfriends (the one with the "sugar imbalance")]] was smacking him around because of a bookshelf, he tried to call 911 and then hit her in self-defense. She...rather liked that. His response was to scream in terror and lock himself in the bathroom.

* TheHeckler: It's happened to him plenty of times and he brings up individual moments in his podcast. ''Neverlution'' had a moment left in where a guy got upset over his anti-prescription medication rant and he destroyed the guy by suggesting he must have a lot of stock in one of the drugs. ''The Voice in My Head'' has an entire bit built around this, as he said the worst thing someone can do to a comedian isn't to heckle, but rather [[SomebodyDoesntLoveRaymond to not laugh at anything they say]], because every comedian is an AttentionWhore. So one of his {{Epic Fail}}s is him being annoyed by someone who refused to make eye contact with him until he eventually snapped at her, [[https://youtu.be/--FN8mPqSiw and the audience went silent as he stormed off-stage]].
-->'''Titus''': I go backstage, it was a little kitchenette 'cause it was a town auditorium. The comedian I'm working with, this guy named Carl Banks, is lying on the floor in front of the stove, curled up in the fetal position, and he is ''shaking'' with laughter. And I go "What the hell is ''your'' problem, man?!" And he goes - (''gasping for air'') [[spoiler: "She's ''blind''! [[CrossesTheLineTwice Hahahaha!]] [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment She's blind! Hahahaha]]! [[NeverLiveItDown You were screaming into the face of a blind woman!]] And she had no idea!"]]

* TheFunInFuneral: His father's funeral, according to ''The 5th Annual End of the World Tour''. Ken wanted to be buried in a cardboard box, invited everyone he pissed off in life to, well, piss on him (including his own son) while Creator/WillieNelson's "Blue Eyes Crying In The Rain" played. They also charged a cover (but ladies got free admission). A friend of his father's said "It was either the best or the worst funeral ever." Then there was what happened after his dad got cremated. Ken's last wish involved his [[{{Squick}} ashes put in a douche bottle and a hooker who was willing to run him through one more time]]. Christopher tried to go through with it, and ultimately decided to take his brother Dave and sister Shannon to spread the ashes all over several Victoria's Secret dressing rooms and all over the gambling floor of a Caesar's Palace in Lake Tahoe, Nevada (where they felt Ken's presence when Titus spread his ashes on a blackjack table and everyone at the table lost [[note]]which is how Titus lost all the money that was supposed to be for his community college education[[/note]]).

** ''Love is Evol''. After Titus tells his crushing story of how his wife abused him and ruined his life, Titus rants that there is no God and he'll never find love again...until he met his current girlfriend (a 5'11" Diesel Jeans model with two college degrees and breasts implants that she actually bought herself) and, despite some embarrassing moments, has actually found love with a mentally stable woman.

* CombatSadomasochist: [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LZNe10q0reA While one of his psycho girlfriends (the one with the "sugar imbalance") was smacking him around because of a bookshelf]], he tried to call 911 and then hit her in self-defense. She...rather liked that. His response was to scream in terror and lock himself in the bathroom.

* ''Born with a Defect'' (2015): Current show he is touring with, the primary focus is on his kids and being a parent, realizing how horrible he was as a child and how bad his kids can be.

Outside of his professional career, he is an avid car fan (reflected in ''Series/{{Titus}}'') and close friends with legendary car customizer Chip Foose. He is also involved with the Titus Podcast, a popular podcast begun in early 2011, with every episode beginning with the "Armageddon Update" where he takes some horrific recent news story and proceeds to talk about the moral values involved. Except in relentlessly heavy touring schedules, the podcast is largely released weekly. The podcast lineup originally consisted of Titus, longtime friend Tommy "Stuntman Tommy" Primo and his now-wife Rachel "Bombshell Rae" Bradley (the new girlfriend as described in ''Love is Evol''). Stuntman Tommy exited the podcast in October 2012, replaced by "Colonel Jeff" Fox (a podcasting veteran occasionally heard on shows on the Creator/AdamCarolla Network). "Nerdpunk Jeff", as he was known on the show, remained until January 2014, when he was replaced by Titus' own half-brother, Willie "Jello" Johnson.[[spoiler:.. until it was revealed that the African-American "Willie 'Jello' Johnson" was actually a character created and voiced, believe it or not, by Titus himself. As explained on the most recent episode, "The Death of Willie 'Jello' Johnson", UnfortunateImplications led to Titus "killing off" the character, and he will no longer be heard on the podcast.]]

In 2017 he wrote and directed his first independent film ''Film/SpecialUnit'', about an LA cop forced to supervise a new squad consistent of various individuals with special needs ranging from autism to cerebral palsy to dwarfism. The film was in DevelopmentHell for about a decade, a pilot for a tv series was made back in 2006 for Creator/ComedyCentral and was passed on.

** His response to this seemingly convoluted turn of events: "How may I serve thee, Lord?"

-->'''Titus:''' Here's a tip for you, guys - if you're gonna beat her, [[TooDumbToLive don't teach her to fire the weapon!]]

** In ''The Voice in My Head'', he tells a story of how he got to do some stuff with Navy [=SEALs=] at a compound in San Diego for a Comedy Central production. While readying to do an attack-dog simulation, he proceeded to make fun of the attack dog's name ''Tako'' (take-o), calling him "Taco" instead and doing stupid Mexican jokes (because, by his own admission, [[WhatAnIdiot he's an idiot]]). [[https://youtu.be/LyoG7_FDi8c The dog's handler responded by making the attack a little more vicious than intended]].

** In ''The Voice in My Head'', he tells a story of how he got to do some stuff with Navy [=SEALs=] at a compound in San Diego for a Comedy Central production. While readying to do an attack-dog simulation, he proceeded to make fun of the attack dog's name ''Taiko'', calling him "Taco" instead and doing stupid Mexican jokes (because, by his own admission, [[WhatAnIdiot he's an idiot]]). The dog's handler responded by making the attack a little more vicious than intended.

** After falling into the bonfire, he was brought home to endure the wrath of his dad (especially bad since he was grounded and supposed to still be in his room). He walks up the stairs to the front door and Ken comes out about ready to beat him up. But upon seeing him, hair singed, hands bandaged, high on painkillers, Ken could only pace around the porch and expel a high pitch squawk. Looking back Titus was almost proud "I had gone one step ''beyond'' getting my ass kicked."

** Another notable one would just laugh in a drawn-out manner, and when pressed, he told Titus in a thick Southern accent that he was in the Air Force, to which Titus said "Why? You couldn't get into a real college?" This upset the heckler enough to rush the stage and threaten to beat Titus' ass, which he later did after the show because the audience said they'd beat HIS ass if he attacked Titus on-stage.

-->'''Titus''': I go backstage, it was a little kitchenette 'cause it was a town auditorium. The comedian I'm working with, this guy named Carl Banks, is lying on the floor in front of the stove, curled up in the fetal position, and he is ''shaking'' with laughter. And I go "What the hell is ''your'' problem, man?!" And he goes - (''gasping for air'') [[spoiler: "She's ''blind''! [[CrossesTheLineTwice Hahahaha!]]"]]

* TheHeckler: It's happened to him plenty of times and he brings up individual moments in his podcast. ''Neverlution'' had a moment left in where a guy got upset over his anti-prescription medication rant and he destroyed the guy by suggesting he must have a lot of stock in one of the drugs. ''The Voice in My Head'' has an entire bit built around this, as he said the worst thing someone can do to a comedian isn't to heckle, but rather [[SomebodyDoesntLoveRaymond to not laugh at anything they say]], because every comedian is an AttentionWhore. So one of his {{Epic Fail}}s is him being annoyed by someone who refused to make eye contact with him until he eventually snapped at her, and the audience went silent. He found out later [[OhCrap the "heckler" was blind]].

One of the defining moments of his life and a key part of his stand-up routine is the fact that, as a teenager, he was a big party-er (taking from his dad, who had that JekyllAndHyde-style personality flip whenever he drank alcohol) but quit drinking and partying when he fell into a bonfire and (barely) survived. As he says "Does anyone ever shudder with the crap that you pulled off and didn't die?"

When he started traveling the stand-up circuit, Titus kept his material in the realm of observational comedy of the "Hey, you ever walk into a store and see..." type. He was scared of showing the audience just how extreme he could be but, under the demands of his manager, he began edging in his dysfunctional family life into his act. Specifically, he talked about how scared he was that his mother's insanity could be genetic and that he wanted to stay away from utensils while guests were around. The results surprised him as the audience loved it and if he ever went back to the "walk into a store" routine they would immediately turn off. Eventually his material encompassed ''everything'' about his family and the stuff he had to deal with.

Now Titus considers his routine to be "[[GallowsHumor Therapeutic Stand-Up]]," in that being able to joke about such topics as domestic violence, mental illness, [[DrivenToSuicide suicide]], [[DysfunctionJunction family dysfunction]], DomesticAbuse and [[TheAlcoholic alcoholism]] has allowed him to accept those things in his life, try and make peace with his father, and move on to make sure that no one has to suffer like he did. He started to make it big in the late 90's with some TV guest appearances and becoming a featured performer at various comedy clubs.

* TheHeckler: It's happened to him plenty of times and he brings up individual moments in his podcast. ''Neverlution'' had a moment left in where a guy got upset over his anti-prescription medication rant and he destroyed the guy by suggesting he must have a lot of stock in one of the drugs. ''The Voice in My Head'' has an entire bit built around this, as he said the worst thing someone can do to a comedian isn't to heckle, but rather to not laugh at anything they say, because every comedian is an AttentionWhore. So one of his {{Epic Fail}}s is him being annoyed by someone who refused to make eye contact with him until he eventually snapped at her, and the audience went silent. He found out later [[OhCrap the "heckler" was blind]].

* HandsOffParenting: Described on that page, but suffice to say, his encounter with this "made the DMV '''[[UpToEleven worse]]'''!"
* TheHeckler: It's happened to him plenty of times and he brings up individual moments in his podcast. ''Neverlution'' had a moment left in where a guy got upset over his anti-prescription medication rant and he destroyed the guy by suggesting he must have a lot of stock in one of the drugs. ''The Voice in My Head'' has an entire bit built around this, as he said the worst thing someone can do to a comic is not look at them or laugh because they are {{attention whore}}s. So one of his {{Epic Fail}}s is him being annoyed by someone who refused to make eye contact with him until he eventually snapped at her, and the audience went silent. He found out later [[OhCrap the "heckler" was blind]].