Reviews Comments: Comment by Fillede Marius

Comment by Fillede Marius
I would very much like a word with the author concerning historical details. England being the small, isolated island country that it was, no one from Romania, not even the voivode, would speak English; if they did speak it, it would be Middle English, which Integra would not have understood. Moreover, eyeglasses did exist, but they were for the wealthy and with Integra having no earthly belongings, it would have seemed very strange. Juice was not a common beverage in medieval Romania, either, Vlad was held captive for ten to twelve years, not three months, and a woman would not have fought in such a high position, much less an outsider with dark skin that could easily be a Turkish spy. However, the major problems that this fic suffers from are character derailment and the fact that the author is practically shoving the relationship in one's face. Vlad was a calm, cool customer who had his hands full with pulling up a country with a nonexistent economy controlled by a corrupt government and keeping the Ottomans and Christian Europe appeased; he would not have showed weakness and his interactions with Integra would have been much more formal; the lady herself would have been aware of her position and not acted so rashly nor thrown her long-held virginity aside like yesterday's dinner. There is no subtlety or building on the relationship between them; in less than twenty-four hours, they are a couple with no conflict or problems other than what's going on in the country. The writing is extremely implausible and the wanton cruelty to the common comma doesn't help things. The idea, however, is clever and could work, but this troper would suggest a heavy rewrite.


In order to post comments, you need to

Get Known