Romance

Yeah it's so easy to focus on your own situation you forget to be happy and excited for other people too. So congrats to them.

So, the other night there was some family drama between my mother and older brother. Won't go much in to detail, but it did end with me having a little heart-to-heart with my brother and talking to him about things I otherwise haven't really talked to with close family members about.

I'm saying this here because among what I talked to him about, one was that I finally told him about my girlfriend. First time telling a close family member, felt good.

He seemed supportive and respects that I want to tell our parents when it feels right. This is the first step towards that in my mind.

For those of you who don't remember my previous posts, my girlfriend and I are in a long-distance relationship and we met through here, although we have seen pictures of each other and video chatted aplenty. There's just the issue of my parents approving since they would be understandably concerned and maybe just would not understand us.

I do want to tell them someday some, because in general I really just should let them know, and also because the sooner this is out in the open for them, the sooner me and Nova can start planning to finally meet up in the flesh.

I'm dreaming of my crush once a night for a week now. Whether it's a kiss or he's just appears, he just IS.

On the surface we're just friends and stuff. We share the same screenwriting class and having worked together on minor film sets like today which I did audio. I really want to ask him out, but, how do you even do that without ending the friendship right then and there?

This Friday I'm doing a personal screening of one of my favorite films Dirty Harry. He says he'll go. I really want to try then. Maybe make it casual one on one hangout at first? I dunno, I haven't had weird strength in feels like this EVER.

You should try and see if they're interested in doing anything else together. That's what I'd do.

Picked up the paper at my house today and noticed my crush was in it. I found out she's a big drama person. Not to mention she was wearing this ridiculously sexy costume for her play. I don't really know what to do anymore about her. I just want to get a chance to talk to her. That's it right now.

edited 15th Nov '17 2:24:11 PM by Scarecrow4774

The woman who had a crush on me at Mcdonald's and started texting with me asked me if I had a girlfriend, and then if she had a chance with me. We agreed that while we're both interested in getting to know each other with an eye on having a relationship, it's too early to make any commitments.

When she asked if I had a girlfriend, I told her plainly that while I don't have a girlfriend, my best friend is a woman, I'm disappointed my best friend doesn't want me as a boyfriend, but I'm happy to have her as a friend and I would want a girlfriend who can trust me to keep my best friend, and that I wanted to spell all that out early because some people are possessive of their partners. She said she liked my way of thinking.

I certainly never expected to strike up a dialogue with a woman with a computer translator in the middle, but she doesn't speak English and I don't speak Spanish. I was misinformed about her abilities with English when her coworker told me about her.

edited 18th Nov '17 7:35:54 PM by TParadox

If she doesn't have a functional ability of the common language of the country she's in, that's not on you.

It's hard for anyone to learn any language past childhood, English doubly so. I don't begrudge anyone who's having trouble learning it as a second language. I'm more comfortable communicating in text anyway, it's just that when in the same space, just speaking is a lot simpler than typing a message, especially for quick little things, and communication is what's supremely important in getting to know someone. But we're able to communicate better than I expected this way.

I'm dangerously close to quoting the speech from The Great Dictator.

I'm all for multiculturalism. I really am. I just think one should learn basics of the common language of the country one moves to. I wouldn't move to Russia without knowing some Russian or being able to read Cyrllic.

If you could not do that, that would be lovely.

You have the luxury of being able to wait while you learn, and get good education in it before you leave. Not everybody does.

She told me in her country, they don't teach English even at university level. She was taking ESL here before having to work two jobs to be able to keep getting by took up all her time.

Fair enough, I guess.

I don't know the specifics of how her move was timed either. She just said "I was studying nursing in my country, then life happened before I could finish and I came here." And of course she can't resume her nursing education until she gets functional in English.

I'm just gonna rant for a bit here

So I recently met this girl thru online dating. We've chatted for a week or two and then went for brunch and movie two weekends ago. I thought it went well, but what the fuck do I know... Afterwards I asked if she wants to meet again and she said she might be free in two weekends since she's meeting other guys last weekend. It's online dating so it's not unexpected, but it seemed oddly honest of her or maybe she was trying to hint something at me, whatever. So we didn't texted at all for last week...I guess I was waiting for her to text me, coz me texting a girl never seem to work out for me.

Anyways, I finally texted her today to see if she's still free next weekend and the first thing she texted back was to ask who was texting her!! She said she didn't know who I was coz I don't have a profile picture...wtf, did she not add me to her contact list? Just too lazy to scroll thru our previous conversations to figure out who she was texting? All I could think of is that she deleted my contact and our previous conversations.

I don't know if I should've just stopped texting right there, but I ended up reminding her who I was and asked her if she was free this coming weekend. She tells me she'll be busy Black Friday weekend shopping and watching Justice League. Fuck it. She's rapidly falling into my "I don't give a shit about" category. Maybe I'll try asking her out once more, but my gut feeling (from my ample rejection experience ) is that I'm likely not going to get anywhere with her.

/end rant

Fuck, I'm going back to my FGO waifus. I'm not even heartbroken or anything...I'm just pissed coz I find it rude.

edited 20th Nov '17 7:46:29 PM by nightwyrm_zero

Did you introduce yourself when you texted her again? It happens sometimes, forgetting who the person is. Maybe it's best if you gave her a small reminder of who you are and the fact that you went out with her for a bit. She might not have had a lot of time to look through your conversations. She might have not been doing it out of malice but rather she may have had so many conversations in the past, that she needs a little bit of a reminder. I don't think you should completely 100 percent put blame on her. I know you gave a little bit of space but maybe don't get upset about it.

As for her being busy, it IS Black Friday and she'll be really really REALLY busy that day and she probably doesn't want to drag you along to shop since she'll be concentrating on several things. If she did bring you along, you probably would be a bit ticked because she's not giving you some attention. As for the Justice League thing, she's probably needs to unwind after a whole bunch of shopping. Some people just need that time to unwind alone, or with a close knit of friends, after a long day. In her case, a movie after a bunch of shopping. Again, it's not against you, but would you bring a date with you during one of the busiest times of the year?

If you think you're not getting anywhere with her, move on. If you're honestly going to think this way, you may have to may on from this girl. If you do get with this gal, these feelings will cause her to kind of resent you and it won't work well for either of you. She's not rejecting you because she's being rude, just give her a time when things aren't so hectic. I don't know you all that much, but please don't be pissed about this situation enough for it to ruin your dating life. You'll be fine. Just give things time.

I was just blowing off some steam. My emotional states rarely affect me for very long and I try hard to not let it affect my interactions with other people.

We texted a bit more yesterday about inconsequential things so we'll see. I like to give people I meet online at least two dates since first dates are almost always awkward.

Sigh, at least dating irl is cheaper than rolling the FGO waifu gacha, .

I just wanted to give you some advice the next time this situation rears itself again. That goes for anyone else here.I hope you'll do alright.

About a week before Thanksgiving, my crush was lamenting about a favorite food of hers that she hadn't gotten a chance to eat in awhile. So, I sort of used that as an excuse to give her a gift for Thanksgiving. I also gave her a greeting card, which in retrospect may have been a little too much. Anyway, she was talking to me today, and well...

Her: I showed my mom the card you gave me. She thought it was really sweet. She was also saying that she thinks you like me, but I told her that was nonsense and that you were just a really nice guy.

Me: *just kinda looked around awkwardly.*

So, uh, did I just get friendzoned?

Making your feigned obliviousness explicit is a pretty cold way to do it. You should try being more direct and at least get a more concrete answer.

I made Christmas cheesecakes for a couple of crushes once. And delivered them to their homes over the break unannounced. One of them she'd never even given me her home address, I just found her unusual family name in the phone book. And I had to leave it with her grandfather because it turned out that she was out with her boyfriend at the time...

I think you might of had a perfect chance to tell her but take that with a grain of salt (no way in telling that would work out).

After thinking about it some more, yeah, I probably should've came clean right then and at least gotten a definite answer. (Yet another social fail from me. )

Yeah that was probably either her fishing to get an answer or her trying to let you down in a roundabout way. Or it’s possible that she’s also bad at this and has no idea.

Unless you know that the other person can pick up on subtle messages and hints don’t go for them, they just lead to confusion.

I seem to have a date. I've been texting with the young lady from Mcdonald's and we had a general idea of "we should arrange to meet sometime outside work", since we haven't been able to really meet face to face at the restaurant since she works in the back. Well, yesterday, she suggested we go to the Trail of Lights downtown, and I said that would be good, and today she offered a day to go and when I said that day was okay, she asked what time. So that's happening.

Good luck.

Keep in mind that it doesn’t even have to be a formal date to turn into something, I hung out one on one with my now girlfriend a bunch before we had an actual date.