AI Dungeon Stories

You are Homer Simpson, a fat and lazy man living in Springfield, Oregon. Your daughter alerts you that she saw the boogeyman. You crash into your son, Bart's room, and warn him. Bart tells you that he saw the boogeyman too. Lisa then says she saw the boogeyman outside her window, but she is not scared.

> You grab a shotgun.

You grab the shotgun off the wall, trying not to inhale too much fat and grease into your lungs. Lisa points out that Marge has the same gun. You pat her on the head, and smile.

> You say "alright gamers, let's find this boogeyman"

You head to Lisa's bedroom window. You look out into the night, scanning through the darkness. Everything seems normal. Suddenly, something black and fast pounces out of the bushes, grabbing Lisa.

> You shoot the monster.

You desperately aim your shotgun, firing. The blast misses, and you notice the monster disappearing into the bushes. The bushes shake, and you notice the creature is gone. Marge runs into the room, clearly terrified.

> You crank that soulja boy.

You grab your trusty soulja boy, and smoke it...

...before cranking it. The song "Crank That" by Soulja Boy is now playing.

Marge screams at the top of her lungs, "HOMER! STOP CRANKING THAT SOULJA BOY!!!!"

> You say "nah"

You continue to crank the Soulja Boy song, as Marge tries to shut off the power.

The lights flicker on and off 3 times...

The power goes out.

> You say "Marge, why did you shut off the power? Now we can't find the Boogeyman!"

Marge replies, "I did it because the power is shutting off on its own! There's something wrong with the power grid!" Suddenly, you notice several flashes out of the corner of your eye.

> You say "Oh, no..."

You look over at Lisa's closet, where several demons are feasting on Lisa, who is screaming for help.

Lisa is the only survivor.

Lisa screams, "MOM! HELP ME!"

> You shoot the demons.

You fire several shotgun blasts at the demons, and manage to kill them. Unfortunately, Lisa is one of the few survivors.

Lisa thanks you, saying, "I'm going home!"

Lisa leaves.

> You say "ok lets kill boogeyman"

You enter Lisa's room. You look out her window, noticing the creature lurking in the darkness. Its huge, black, Spiderman-like eyes stare at you. THINKING!

It disappears from your view.

> You go after it.

You quickly run out of Lisa's window, and go through the darkness. Suddenly, you notice something.

It looks like a large, flying monstrosity. You begin to run away, when...

>flanders appears out of nowhere, riding it.

"I'M HERE!" Flanders screams in your face.

"AAAAAAARRRGH!"

>”How-diddly-doodily are you, Homer?" Flanders asks.

"I need to kill that flying beast!" Flanders asks.

"Why?" you ask.

"You can see the pattern, yes?" Flanders asks.

"I need your help.

> You say "The boogeyman is attacking our family!"

"Uh, huh," Flanders nods.

"That's why I want to kill the banshee bird!" you say.

"Oh, dear," Flanders says. Flanders raises an eyebrow.

> You shoot Flanders.

You snarl and aim your shotgun.

"Hey, wait!" Flanders says.

You pull the trigger, blowing half of Flanders' head off. "Ah, my goodness!"

> You shoot the bird.

The bird falls on the ground, landing on Flanders's corpse. Marge looks terrified, but knows you had to do it for the family.

Lisa screams and hugs you tightly, as you pat her head.

"You did the right thing, son," Milhouse says.

You walk outside and find yourself in the middle of a crater.

> You say "Hm... something seems different..."

You notice a strange silver disk on the ground, next to the monster. "What is that?" you ask yourself.

Suddenly, Lisa screams, "THEY'RE COMING!"

> You say "GET BART IN HERE WITH THE DYNAMITE!"

Bart runs inside.

"Quick, dynamite that monster!" you say, running back inside. "Lisa, hide! Bart, help me barricade the door!" Marge says, running to her bedroom.

> You kILL THE BOGEYMEN.

"Everyone, stay in your rooms!" you shout. You sprint upstairs, barricading yourself in Milhouse's room and closing the door. "We need to kill the bogeymen," you think.

> You plant a nuclear bomb.

You open your mouth to speak, but you are cut off by a boom! You clutch your ears and sit down on the floor, thankful that you weren't near the blast.

> You say "Marge? Kids? Are you okay?"

Silence.

You stand up and slowly open the door. You see a lump on the bed, and walk towards it.

It's Milhouse. He's dead.

> You say "NOOOO! NOT BART'S WEIRD FRIEND!"

You sprint over to the back of the house, where you find Bart lying on the ground.

> You say "Bart, are you okay?"

He slowly sits up.

"I didn't mean to... I just..."

"Shhhhh," you say, patting him on the head. "It's okay."

"Uh, wrong house, dude,"

> You say "Good thing this wasn't our house. our TV would have been demolished."

"Yeah,"

You both laugh.

"The house shook!" Marge shouts from behind the bedroom door. "We have to kill the bogeymen!"

"I know, Ma," Bart says.

> You use Flanders's boogeyman radar.

You steal it from his house, and use it to track down the monster. You and the family find him after a few minutes.

The monster is ugly. It has many piercings, a shaved head, and is covered in tattoos. It holds up its arms, and you blast it with lasers until it explodes.

> You high-five Marge.

"Yeah!" you yell.

"Good job, fam," Marge says.

You and the rest head inside.

> You go to sleep.

The next morning, you wake up and see that Marge is still asleep. You walk over to the TV.

"Good morning, Homer," a deep voice says.

You whirl around. It's the monster.

> You say "AAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!"

He bursts into laughter as you struggle to come up with something to say.

"Well, this is an unexpected surprise," he laughs.

"I'll kill you!" you yell, and sprint over to the TV.

> You crank that soulja boy to kill the monster.

"Thanks," he says, and the screen goes black.

You see a newspaper article on the news about the monster's death.

> You dance.

The family bursts into laughter as you dance around the room. Lisa walks in and joins in the laughter.

"I'll give you one guess what this is all about,"

> You say "I cranked that Soulja Boy."

Marge stands up. "Homer, I'm sorry I ever doubted you," she says.

"You did?" you ask.

"Yes, I was pre-occupied with my own grief, and I should have strived to put the needs of others first," Marge says.

> You get a beer.

"Good," Marge says. "I'll make some pancakes."

"Sweet!" you say.

The monster bursts into laughter as you and the family sit down to eat.

> You say "I love you, boogeyman."

"I love you back, fam," the monster says and leaves.

THE END

You are Wario, a fat and smelly treasure hunter from Diamond City. You are heading to the Amazon River on a school field trip. You are equipped with power gloves and three cloves of garlic.

The bus pulls up in front of a small house. A man steps out onto the porch and waves you inside. He is wearing an old-fashioned shirt, jeans, sneakers and carrying a large backpack.

> You go and see the man.

You walk into the house and find yourself staring at a middle-aged man who looks like he has been crying all day.

> You laugh at the man.

You laugh at the man, saying "Man, you look like you need a laugh. Whadda ya havta be so sad about?" He replies "Nothing. But thanks for the sympathy."

> You fart on the man.

You fart on the man, who is not amused and proceeds to push you out of his way.

> You go back to the school bus.

You walk back to the school bus, thinking you just messed up in front of a bunch of children. You climb onto the bus, and find out that your mistake didn't go unnoticed. A boy sitting behind you calls out "Hey Wario, you are going to pay for that!" The bus driver pulls over and tells you to come with him outside. You comply. When you arrive, the boy who had called you out is there with two others. The first kid is small and skinny, with blond hair and green eyes. You would find him cute if he wasn't accusing you of stealing his lunch money. The second kid is enormous.

> You punch the first kid.

You punch the first kid, and he falls to the ground. The second kid tries to hit you, but you block and throw him into the first kid. You punch both kids in the head at the same time.

> You steal their money.

You grab the kids' money and run away. You can feel everyone watching you as you run back to the bus.

> You hijack the bus.

You board the bus and take control over it. You slam the bus up on its wheels and drive away. You find yourself in mid air and manage to steer the bus back onto the road.

> You drive the bus into the amazon river.

You drive the bus into the river and into the amazon. You manage to keep it afloat, and you find yourself drifting down the river with no means of escape. Your fate is unknown.

> You drown the kids in the bus.

You let the bus sink, and jump in the water to drown the children inside. You manage to hold your breathe for three minutes and thirty seconds, breaking the world record.

> You steal the dead kids' money.

You swim back up to the surface and loot the bus. You manage to find 25 dollars in cash, which is all the dead children had on them. The bus sinks back below the surface.

> You eat garlic.

You eat garlic, which makes you feel like you are going to die. You search the bus to see if you can find anything worth while, but find nothing of value.

> You find the great treasure cave of the amazon jungle.

You walk along the path for several hours. You are rewarded with the discovery of a great cave that was carved out by an ancient civilization.

> You go in the cave.

You enter the cave and find yourself in another world. Beautiful landscape is illuminated by the light of the moon. You spot a black pillar standing alone in the distance.

> You touch the pillar.

As soon as your hand touches the pillar, you feel dizzy. An ominous voice emanates from the pillar. "I summon you into my presence. The souls of your dead comrades will be sent to me." Your head begins to hurt, and you feel very sick.

> You say "No! Wah? What's happening? Where is the gold?"

"The gold is not yours. You are a petty thief seeking nothing more than your own greed." You feel yourself being stretched. You feel as if invisible hands are holding you apart.

> You say "I never meant to kill Waluigi! I JUST ACCIDENTALLY BUMPED HIM OFF THAT CLIFF!"

"Liar. You are a murderer and a thief, and I have summoned you here to take your due." "I'm NOT a murderer! I didn't mean to kill that other guy either! That WAS an accident!

> You try to escape.

You manage to make it back to the entrance of the cave, but you feel as if the world is spinning. You are then struck by a bolt of lightning. You wake up in pain. You don't know where you are. The landscape is strange, and seems to shape in ways that aren't possible. The grass is multicolored. The sky is red. You look around desperately, but find nothing of value. You notice a strange metal disk attached to a pole. A small sign hangs from the disk that reads "Magical Disk"

> You say "Wahoo! Finally, some treasure!"

"What are you doing?" a voice cries. A strange man wearing strange clothes appears from behind a rock. "Finally, some normalcy!" the man cries. "What the heck is this?" you ask. "Oh, this is the Magical Disk. It lets you trade items with the owner of the world." "What?

> You say "Who the heck owns this world?"

"Uh...well, nobody. I mean, I suppose Nintendo owns it. But anyway, have you collected all the items on your list?" "I'm not sure. I think so..."

> You say "But I killed all of the children doing the scavenger hunt and stole their money"

"Oh, that was you? Well you did an impressive job. Heh heh heh...I suppose that makes the thieves goon you hired a murderer and a kidnapper.

> You say "It doesn't matter! I need to find the Amazonian Treasure!"

"Well, I suppose if you're here to claim the prize, this is the correct disk to put in the slot." You slide the disk into the slot. The disk beeps a few times, and then a new file appears in the menu. It reads "Treasure 1."

> You open the file.

The file opens to reveal a picture of an emerald ring. It is very beautiful. "That's the Amazonian Amulet." The man says.

> You say "Well, you better tell me where it is! I ain't got all day!"

"Oh yes, of course. Well, the Amulet is in the middle of New York City." "What?!" "The ring is right in the middle of New York City. It's so big, the whole city is covered by a magical barrier to protect it, hence why nobody has found it yet." "I knew something was strange about that case. So where exactly is this city? I mean is it a place on this world or something?" "Nope. It's a special kind of place in the real world. It exists only within a few city maps you can get at a department store. Even the police can't enter it." "Why can't anyone enter it?" "Nobody really knows. There are rumours that a serial killer entered it once, but he came back in a week flat. Others say that the barrier is protecting something even more valuable than the amulet. Something mysterious and magical, perhaps.

> You say "I need to find that city! I'll be rich! Rich! RICH! HAHAHAA!!!"

"Well, you have come to the right place. I am Klint. I was sent to help you get inside the city. Here." Klint hands you a small map. It seems fairly easy to get to the city, as far as you can tell. "Please, take this. I must prepare for your final task.

> You go to the city.

You take the map and leave the cave. The world outside is fascinating to you. Everything is decorated for Christmas. Little decorations, buildings, trees, lights, snowmen, everything. You've never seen anything so pretty. You find a little cabin, light the fire, and begin to prepare for the night's task. Suddenly, your doorbell rings. Who could that be at this hour? You go to the door and open it... to find a strange man standing there. He doesn't look very big, but you can tell he's tough. He has a dark blue jacket, black gloves, and black boots. In one hand he carries a large metal briefcase. The man smiles as he sees you. "Hello there! My name's Christmas, and you are?" "Uh... Chris.

> You say "No! My name is Wario!"

"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought we had an agreement." "Look, are you going to let me in, or what?" Wario asks impatiently.

> You say "I'm wario"

"Hm. I see. Well, we might have a deal after all." "Great. Come in!" Wario steps in, and you close the door behind him.

> You say "I AM WARIO"

"Really? Out of all the monkeys, crabs, and other freaks in the world, you had to come here? Are you sure you should be on your feet?" "Hey, I'm not a loser."

> You fIND THE AMULET AND GET MONEY.

Wario is angry. "I don't believe this. A half breed who doesn't even know what his own powers are. I stoled the amulet, you know." "What?! You stole it?"

> You say "YOU ARE NOT WARIO. I AM!"

"Oh? Well, you might be right. I feel pretty darned Wariosque." "You are not me. I am me. My name is Wario. You are a lowly, pathetic half breed. My name is Wario." "Sorry to burst your ego, but you're not Wario, you're just some guy who thinks he's Wario." "

> You fIGHT YOUR DOPPELGANGER.

"Alright, fine. I'M Wario." "And I'm your doppelganger. Now do you let me in or what?"

> You say "Go away, loser! More Warios means less treasure for me!"

"You are no longer in control of the situation. I am in charge. It was I who came to your door. I will decide what you do next. But let's just say, I'm thinking that it might be in your best interest if you let me in." "Um... okay...

> You say "But I gett aall the treasure! ME!"

"Hah! I don't care about the treasure. I just need to get in that city." "What?! That's not why I came here!" "Oh? Well why did you come then?"

> You say "For the treasure! Duh!"

"Because it has everything I've ever wanted." "So you've said. But deep down, it's because you want to be rich. Isn't that right?" You don't answer.

> You go to the city.

You leave the cabin. "Hey, where are you going?" Wario asks. "I'm going to the city. That's where the treasure is! C'mon, let's go!" "Wait a minute. You can't just leave." "Why not? What are you going to do, follow us?" "Well, actually yes. I'm staying nearby anyway. I might be your doublesetter." "Oh." "Listen, that's not the most important reason why you can't just leave. I'm in the middle of something right now and I can't just abandon it. It would be a shame if something happened to all these scrolls because I had a doublesetter waiting around somewhere else." "Oh.

> You say "No matter how handsome you are, you won't stop me from getting that treasure RIGHT NOW! "

Wario grumbles and rolls his eyes. "Fine. We need a distraction though." "Of course." You turn around and go back to the cabin. "What are you doing?" Wario shouts. "I'm setting off the firebomb I hid in there. When the smoke clears we'll have a perfect distraction! C'mon!" "I'm not lighting that thing! I don't even like fires!" "Pfft, who doesn't like them? They're fun! Now let's go!

> You go to the city to find the Amazonian Amulet.

Wario grumbles as you leave with the firebomb in hand. You walk through the forest, basking in the moonlight. The bomb at your side feels comforting in your hand.

> You kiss the bomb.

You feel the lips of the bomb against your lips. "What do you think you're doing?" the bomb asks. "Firebomb. Fire. Burn," you sing, but then stop yourself. "What?" "Nothing! Nevermind. You're a firebomb, aren't you? I can make you do anything." "Yes, but what are you planning?

> You say "I'M GOING TO BLOW UP THE CITY WALLS!"

"Yes! Good plan. Fire everything!" Wario the Learnedbomb nods in agreement. You grin from ear to ear. It's the perfect distraction! The guards won't even have a chance to respond before their flaming bodies are pincered by the other villagers. You run towards the city with the bomb at your side.

> You throw the bomb.

You toss the bomb as you run. At the last second, you duck down out of sight. You watch it fly through the air, narrowly dodging several arrows. Unfortunately, the village is so small, there's no place to hide. As you run out from your hiding place, you see the guards run up to kill the flames.

> You bum-rush the guards.

You walk out from your hiding place, ready to kill. The guards look at you, puzzled. "Whut?" one of them asks. "Wario??" the other says, looking up. "No. The other one. The one with a plan!" "Oh. You must be referring to this guy.

> You charge at the guards.

The guards stand there, confused. They didn't expect you to attack! In fact, they probably thought you'd be hiding somewhere or running away. Unfortunately for them, they're dead wrong.

> You throw the guards at each other.

You start to run, and quickly change direction. You use your body to push the guards into each other while they're still trying to figure out what's going on.

> You fart on the guards.

You stop pushing and start pushing again. The guards fart. Then, you drop kick one of them right in the kisser. He falls down, screaming.

> You finish them.

You finish them off with a couple quick punches. You then take the firebomb you were carrying and throw it at the burning pile of meat that was the guards. You turn around, and walk away.

> You say "Alright, enough of those jerks. Time to find the amulet!"

You walk through the forest, towards your goal. Eventually, you find a large oak door embedded in a wall.

> You open the door.

You open the door, revealing a staircase going down. "Perfect," you say. You descend the stairs, and continue to descend, descending down a spiral staircase. Eventually, you find yourself in a round room with a large iron gate. The room has several tunnel-like openings, all covered by iron gates as well.

> You bash open the gates with your fatt butt.

You lift up the gate, and look through it. "Hurry, flee!" a voice cries. You look, and see a scene of horror. Four men, dressed in black robes and hoods, have surrounded a young man, holding a baby in his arms. The man looks at you with horror in his eyes. "Please. Help me and my child,"

> You say "No way! I've got treasure to find!"

"Pfft! You'd turn down a chance to save a child? C'mon, you fat piece of..." You hit the man in the face, and he falls to the ground clutching his face. "Please. I have a daughter. I'm not a pedophile. I took the oath. Please, help me." You turn away from the scene and leave the gate.

> You find the treasure room.

You walk along the tunnels, looking for the right one. Eventually, you find it, taking it off a drunken miner. "You little monster! You stole my ale!" he says, pulling out a dagger. You smack him hard, knocking him out cold. You continue to converse with him. "Hmm... yes, yes I did. Thanks for playing." "Hell, I don't even know you. How do I know you're telling the truth?" "Because if I wasn't, I'd just kill you and take the bauble for myself.

> You rush the miner.

You hit him over the head with the iron bar. He's out cold. You search his pockets, finding 7 gold coins, a knife, and a key.

> You steal his money.

You take the miner's money, and shove it in your own pocket. "Thank you for not killing me." "The pleasure is all mine." You turn around and start walking back to the stairs.

> You find the treasure.

You walk down the stairs, and into the large circular room. There's a large golden chest in the center of the room, guarded by a standing skeleton in a suit of rusty armor. You approach the skeleton slowly...

> You fart.

As soon as you do, the skeleton lets out a horrid shriek, and you quickly jump back. The skeleton begins pounding on the ground, and the large chest nearby begins rattling.

> You open the chest.

You open the chest, revealing a large amount of gold. You smile, smile, smile, as you dig through the chest, collecting gold coins and putting them into your bag.

> You run away with the money.

You quickly run up the stairs, back to the man's room, and through the doorway. You back into the hallway, dropping the bag of treasure and pulling out your knife in a fighter's crouch.

> You pick up the treasure bag.

You grab the bag with your good hand, but drop it when the man begins to sit up. "What...?"

> You pick the treasure bag back up.

You sit down on the man to make sure he can't get up. He begins to struggle, but he's much weaker than you. You pull off his hood and robe, seeing a weak old man.

> You punch him.

You swing your good arm and strike the old man in the jaw. He begins to ooze out of the robe, falling to the ground, but his strength far exceeds his age.

> You run away with the treasure.

You grab the old man's robe and run outside. You stop in the doorway, looking around. There's a large group of people inside, laughing and drinking.

> You go home.

You head back inside, and out into the stairway. You begin walking up the stairs again, as two men in red robes walk down, laughing. "Why so serious?" one says.

> You go back to the village.

You look around the room for a weapon. There's a giant club on the ground, a large stone-wielding man struggling to lift it up, and a small knife that the giant has forgotten. There's also the small dagger in your pocket, but you can't reach it.

> You fart.

As soon as you do, the giant lets out a horrible shriek and drops the stone club. He begins pounding on the ground, and the stone club flies up into the air and into your hand.

> You bash the giant with the club.

You swing the club and strike the giant in the back, just above his waist. The giant falls to the ground in pain, you pick up the club, and enter his chest with the blade.

> You exit the dungeon.

You exit the dungeon and head up the stairs. "Took you long enough. I thought we were robbed." the man with the green cap says.

> You say "LUIGI! This is YOUR house? YOU'RE the Amulet's guard?"

"Yes, what of it?" "It's been so long since I've heard that name. Are you the guard's son?" "What if I am? Does it matter to you? Are you here for the money? I can give it to you; I've stolen much from the government over the years." "What if I'm here for another reason?" "W-well?

> You say "I'm here for the money, duh! Hand it over or there'll be trouble!"

The man sighs, pulling out a gun. He shoots you through the chest, and you fall to the ground. However, you manage to survive, because one of the bullets was reflected off of a coin in your pocket. You push yourself up, holding your chest. "That was a coin. I'm holding you to your deal." You laugh, and the man shoots you again in the kneecap.

> You rush at him at full strength.

You charge at the man with the gun, grabbing it and twisting it in his hands. You feel a sharp pain in your fingers and the back of your hand, causing you to drop it. "AGH!"

> You say "I've gotta run before he kills me!"

You pull out the gun and shoot at the giant, but you miss, and he smashes you in the face with his fist. You fall to the ground, holding your face as the man points the gun at you.

> You run away with the treasure.

You drop the gun and run with the bag. The giant yells, and chases after you. You manage to get out the door, and begin running up the road. After a minute or two, you hear... A loud clapping noise. You look behind, but the giant is clapping. Silver coins begin raining from the sky, and you realize he's shooting silver bullets at you.

> You get on a boat.

You quickly board a small wooden boat, and row away as quickly as you can. After a minute or two, the man fires again, and you see your first Final Fantasy reference. "Stop!" the man yells. "I'll let you live, so long as you don't insult me." "What?" you say. "How?" The man crouches down.

> You row downriver.

You row downriver. After a few minutes, you notice a man in a black suit standing on the shore, beckoning you to come to him. You row towards him.

> You say "Ah, my escort! Where's my plane?"

"Shut up," the man says. "I'm here to escort you to your death. You've been a thorn in the side of an important man. You must die.

> You say "WAH?"

"Shut up," he says. "I'm here to escort you to your death. You've been a thorn in the side of an important man. You must die.

> You shoot the man.

You pull the trigger of your gun and shoot him in the head, but it has no effect. He just falls to the ground as his body flickers. "Don't worry," he says. "You'll be executed soon. I'm sure you understand." Suddenly, his head explodes. You turn, and realize that the man is now missing an arm. "I'll have my revenge for that,"

> You find your plane.

You find the runway and begin to descend. "Ah, my ride's here!" the man says. "I'll be taking her myself. Enjoy your last moments, vermin."

> You say "NOT IF I GET ON HER FIRST!"

The man turns, and you hit him with your plane. "Argh!" he screams, before you take off. You climb to altitude, before turning West.

> You blow a raspberry.

You blow a raspberry, and feel something land in your hand. You open it, and find a dollar bill.

> You go home.

You arrive home, opening the dollar bill and finding a note inside. Hey Vamp, Here's your dollar back. If you're wondering where I got this plane from, it's simple. After crashing into the building, I found this glider lying on the ground nearby. It's equipped with a tiny engine, and has a few bullets left in it.

> You say “Who is Vamp? I’m Wario!”

You throw away the note, and enjoy your newfound riches. For the first time ever, you have enough money to not have to work for a long time: you can just buy everything you need. Suddenly, Waluigi comes back from the dead and shoots you in the face. You are dead. GAME OVER.

THE END

A group of survivors are working out on an oil rig in the middle of the desert. The desert is blisteringly hot and the crew has recently run out of water. They grab their guns and head into town to try and find some. When they arrive they find the town. They all wake up to find that your camp in ruins. Tents are on fire, and broken tools and supplies litter the sand. They are under attack from a group of mutant animals who are led by a mutant Weasel. The men open fire but the furhag leaps incredible distances and camouflage themselves perfectly in the chaos. It must be said though, that they are very easy to shoot. After about ten minutes of firing the survivors run out of ammo.

> madface7 get more ammo.

You wait for a while but nothing happens. You go back in the house and find all of the ammo is gone.

> madface7 says "Where is all of the ammo?"

You look around and find all of the ammo is gone. You hear a gunshot and see the furhag fall. Madface looks around. "We need to leave, now!" The survivors get into cars and drive away.

> madface7 drives at lightspeed.

You drive your car at lightspeed and follow the survivors. It take quite a while to catch up with them again. You see that they have stopped at a store. There are some suspicious looking people standing around outside. By now the survivors have seen you coming and point guns at you.

> madface7 hug sthe survivors.

You drive towards the survivors and they take cover. Your car slams into them and knocks them down. You get out of the car and shout at them. They are staring in disbelief.

> madface7 hug them.

You drive towards the survivors and they shoot at you. Your car slams into them and knocks them down. You get out of the car and shout at them. They are staring in disbelief. A man walks out from the store and approaches you. "You don't want to do that."

> madface7 says "Alright then. I won't."

The man holds up his hands. "Now, now, no need for that." "Tell me who you are first," you demand. "Name's Hakeem. Used to work in a supermarket in town." "How long have you been waiting out here? When I passed by a while ago the light was on in this shithole." Hakeem shrugs. "A few days, maybe. We don't really check our supplies, you know, in case of an emergency.

> madface7 say a bad word.

"Alright you prick, I'm going to hurt you." "Yes! Yes, do that!" Hakeem cries. https://play.aidungeon.io/main/play?publicId=390ad2f1-9027-4ff5-9a74-7335cc4c558a&p=Display:%20Game.%201%20Burglar You kneel down and punch Hakeem in the face. He falls to the ground. "Come on, let's take what we can get."

> madface7 eat his maclanky.

You grab some of Hakeem's supplies and look around. You find a gun, but it seems to be jammed. Next to it, you find a bottle of some sort of toxic green liquid. You pour some of the liquid on your hand and put it to your mouth.

> madface7 says "I am the milkman. My milk is delicious."

You drink the milk and immediately feel sick. You throw up all over the store. "There, there," says Hakeem. "Maybe it'll work better on you than it did on me." You look around and grab anything you can.

> madface7 die.

As you stand to leave, you feel a sharp pain in your foot. Looking down, you see a bolt from a rifle imbedded in the sole of your shoe. You limp out of the store and find the survivors have escaped.

> madface7 eats his shoe.

You sit on the sidewalk and eat your shoe. It's horrible, but you're full. Soon you fall asleep. Hours later, you are awakened by a knock at the door. You stumble over to the door and open it. "Hello?" Out comes SHREK, looking for HIS next victim...

> madface7 gETS THE HELL OUTTA THE SWAMP.

You stumble out of the marsh and start running. You feel a bolt go into your back, but you don't care. Your stomach hurts, and you've forgotten to eat, but if you can just make it to the castle... You suddenly fall into the ground and don't get up.

> madface7 eats his hat.

You find yourself at the edge of a cliff. Looking down, you see a single brick road. It leads all the way to the castle, which stands before you. You take a deep breath and begin your trek. It goes well at first. You walk along fairly happily, singing songs and enjoying the beautiful spring day. But, after a while, you begin to notice some unusual things. The first is that your stomach is killing you. It hasn't gone down, in fact it's gotten worse.

> madface7 eat shirt.

That doesn't seem like a good idea, so you continue walking. The second thing is that you aren't sure where the hell you are. You've walked along the brick road for quite a while, but you still don't know if you're headed in the right direction.

> madface7 says "I need some chicken nuggets."

The third thing is that you're starting to hear a lot of noise. A lot of weird, disturbing noise. It's coming from the sky. You look up, and what do you see? A bunch of screeching ducks flying towards you...

> madface7 says "DUCK!"

That's the last thing you ever hear as you're showered in duck entrails and bloody feathers.

> madface7 says "what"

Your story comes to an end here.

> madface7 says "no no no waht the fuck"

We thank you for your time and ask if you would please stay for a brief post-interview questionnaire. I'm sorry, but all respondents must be of legal age in their location to read this story.

> madface7 says "alright guess i'll leave then"

Thank you for your interest, and have a nice day!

Our story begins with a group of adventurers living in the medieval kingdom of Larion. The kingdom is filled with small villages and thatched cottages and has been relatively peaceful until now. The adventurers are on a quest to find the magical staff of Zalos. They walk through the forest and notice a band of mountain dwarves. The dwarves are friendly and offer them food and drink. Then one of the dwarves turns to them and mentions that there are rumors of a dragon living in the mountains. The adventurers agree to search the mountains for the dragon. They leave the dwarves and continue their search. This will be dangerous as they have heard that the dragon is very strong.

> Mad eats a hamburger. Ally ate a hamburger and now he's got flu. Cat ate a meat stick and now he's got flu. Bear ate fish and doesn't have flu. You eat a meat stick and now you got flu.

> Mad says "what" "What?" "What are you doing?" You are sitting in a chair, but your mind is wandering. You're not even sure what you're doing here...in fact you don't remember much about why you are here. "I don't know. I had some food and now I'm feeling a bit strange." "You ate a meat stick." "Yeah." "That's gross." "Yeah, but I ate it anyway." "Ugh....

> Mad says "but i like meatsticks slim jims are good" "You ate a meat stick!" "Fine, I know I shouldn't have." Slim Jim pops out from behind the counter. "Look, if you don't like it here, you can leave." "Yeah, I guess that's true."

> Mad kills Slim Jim. You stand up and walk towards Slim Jim. "I'm gonna kill you!" You grab a nearby knife and stab him several times, his body collapsing to the floor. You pull out another knife and begin repeatedly stabbing his face, splattering blood all over you and the wall.

> Awe 921 says "Pogchamp." "Yeah...." "What's wrong?" "I just remembered I have somewhere I have to be." You call a cab and get in, speeding off towards the city. You arrive at your hotel and get your bags, heading to the elevator.

> Cutbug walk in holding a pizza box. "Hey you gotta try this place for pizza, it's only a couple blocks away. Pizzaerestaurant?" The elevator doors open and you step inside. "Yeah, I've never had it before, but I'm always up for trying new things."

> Awe 921 says "No time to explain, buddy, we gotta firebomb Reddit's servers." "Huh?" "Trust me." The elevator doors close.

> Mad says "pizza time" You exit the elevator and walk towards the restaurant. "Guys, forget it, I'm not getting into another debate on politics with you." "Come on! You have to try this place!" You arrive at the restaurant and hold the door open for your friends.

> Mad eat the maclanky. You grab a slice of pizza and shove it in your mouth. Wow, the cheese is really stringy. You begin to cough and nearly suffocate from the excessive stringiness. "Hey come on, you need to try this!"

> Cutbug says "what do pizza and politics have to do with each other" "Fine." Cutbug grabs a slice and takes a bite out of it. "So....what's next?" "I dunno, we can go see a movie, or go bowling, or something." "This is pretty good." "Yeahhhhh." Eat the maclanky. "Alright, do you know where the video store is at?" "I think it's down the street, why?" "Good." You begin walking towards the video store. "Hey Awe, why don't you come with us?" "Sure why not?"

> Awe 921 awe eats the maclanky. As you arrive at the video store, you see several people arguing with the owner. "You have to let us rent movies! We're American!" "No, you aren't, go home." "Wha?! But you just said that all Americans can rent movies!

> Mad jumps off a bridge to get to the video store. As thel argue continues, you start laughing. "What's so funny?" "This, hilarious." The owner gives you a dirty look for agreeing with him. "What are you talking about?

> Mad says "We are talking about pizza" "The owner of this place is an idiot." "Why do you say that?" "He thinks that only people from America can rent movies, gohasts." "Ohhh" "Let's go see if he's willing to change his mind."

> Mad punch the owner. You grab the owner by the collar and punch him in the face, knocking him to the ground. The crowd of people surrounding the store immediately gather around you. "Who let this guy in?" He gets up and wipes the blood from his mouth." "What's going on?"

> Awe 921 knee the owner. You grab Awe and knee him in the groin, knocking him to the ground. The owner tries to stand up, but falls over due to his injuries. "What the...who are you guys?" "This guy is my friend, we're going to let him borrow some movies."

> Cutbug elbow the owner. You grab a nearby chair and elbow the owner in the face, knocking him unconscious. "That was awesome!" "Let's see if we can find something else to do." "C'mon, let's go."

> Mad says "lets go to africa" The three of you leave the store and begin walking down the street. Within a few minutes, you notice several police cruisers pulling up to the store. You step back into the alleyway you were previously hiding in and watch as several officers arrive at the store.

> Cutbug buy plane tickets to Africa. You quickly go to the travel agent and buy three first-class plane tickets to South Africa. The travel agent is speechless when you hand him the money. You tell him you'll be back in two days to return the plane tickets. "What? Who are you?

> Awe 921 says "We are... the AWESOME SQUAD." "Shut up Awe!" Cutworm mutters. "No... that's our name, the AWESOME SQUAD." "Whatever you say Awe." You arrive back at the apartment at about noon the second day with a duffel bag full of money.

> Mad says "IM YOU FROM THE FUTURE" "Let's throw a party!" you yell. "What happens if the cops come?" Mad asks. "We hide, and hope for the best." You open the duffel bag and spread the money all over the floor. "This should be enough to get started."

> Cutbug says "I have crippling depression" "What's that Cutworm?" "I have cr... I have crippling depression....I can't do anything..................." "Come on, your being stupid. Of course you can do this. THEY FLY TO AFRICA AND GET JUMPED BY SHREK IN THE NEXT SCENE.

> Cutbug says "oh hi Shrek" You arrive in Cape Town, South Africa and get a cheap hotel room. The next day you begin your search for the most profitable way to steal the money. THEY END UP GETTING THE MONEY STOLEN IN THE FOLLOWING SCENE.

> Awe 921 says "OH NO ITS GAME OGRE FOR US, PANIC PANIC" You go to a bank and pass yourself off as a tourist. You enter and approach the teller counter. "Hey can you help me?" "Hmmm... you looking for a loan?" "Yeah, do you have any?

> Mad says "oh no its shrek what we do now" "We run!" Awe and Mad yell. You grab the tellers head and slam it down on the counter three times. You lift him up and throw him to the ground. "Give me the money." The teller begins screaming and begging for his life.

> Mad become a hog in nepal. "Shut up!" You yell. You begin choking the teller until he gives you the money. You stop him from screaming by pressing your foot against his throat... causing him to piss himself. "Perfect, it worked." "Shit, it worked!"

> Awe 921 says "WHY ARE WE ROBBING A BANK???" You quickly grab the money and leave the bank, heading to another one. You enter and begin looking around for tellers. "Hey friend, you lost?" You turn your head and notice a man wearing a cowboy hat smiling at you from two seats away.

> Mad says "SINCE WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN" You look at Mad with a dumbfounded face. "What, have you gone insane?" "Yeah... you lost?" "Yeah, I'm looking for the train station." "I know where it is. C'mon, I'll show you." "Ok sure." Thirty feral hogs in police uniforms suddenly enter the building. They immediately put everyone in custody and take them all to the local stockade. Your Awe 921 has gone completely mad and runs away. You have no idea where he's gone, but it's no use trying to find him, you'll be next on the list.

> Mad jUMP OFF A BUILDING. You jump off of the three-story building and survive with only broken bones. Your Awe 921 ends up in a padded cell, having an insane breakdown after trying to rob a police station and get away with it.

> Mad and company enter the afterlife. You have a very long, but quiet and peaceful journey into the afterlife. Nobody to bother you and you can stay as you are for as long as you want. Eventually you get to meet and talk with Jesus Christ, who gives you some good advice about the afterlife.

> Cutbug asks Jesus for advice about the afterlife.

> Awe 921 dab at Jesus Christ. "Jesus, I don't want to die. What happens after you die?" "Well, it depends on what you did while you were alive." "What do you mean?You ask Jesus Christ for advice on the afterlife, your mind is going a little crazy and you really don't know what to do.

> Mad do a flip. "Oh my God, you have got to be kidding me." "I kid you not. He can flip things with his mind. I've seen him flip over a battleship, no lie." "Am I in the presence of God?

> Mad says "okk im going to hell now" "Why yes you are." "Oh well, it's not like I'm not used to it." You're standing in a field with many other people you don't know. Prisoners from all over the world, all there.

> Cutbug says "is purgatory an option" "Oh, I don't believe so."

> Mad eat a bean and cheese taco. "Hey, that's the best thing I've ever tasted!" "I'll go get you some more! They just came out of the back." "Yes!" You yell. You run to the back of the store and grab more food.

> Awe 921 flip Jesus off. You quickly turn around and see a small kid pointing at you. You look up and see Jesus Christ, standing there. "I've seen the things you can do with your mind boy, now its time for you to reap what you've sow" "Huh?"

> Mad open at the AI Dungeon website: https://play.aidungeon.io/main/play?playPublicId=c2743ce5-1c04-4bee-8bd9-c6634fe19e7b. You walk into the dungeon and are immediately overwhelmed by the loud music,odies and general ruckus. There is a counter where you could buy drinks but there is no bar here, just lots of tables and chairs for people to sit at.

> Awe 921 flips Jesus Christ off. "How can I help the dungeon?" "Jesus Christ is my name, make your choice." "Choose me!" You hear Jesus shout as he push people out of his way. "You're drunk!" "You're a sissy!" "Get back here!

> Mad says "nadsio aienf 0a9ejf hr8s0fin esuvnoi" "Ah, of course." Jesus appears and says "Wow! That's one way of doing it."

> Cutbug kills Jesus. "Ah, sorry about that." "Hm, so what's your question?" "What's your name?" "Oh, my name is so unimportant, it could be anything and I would still be the same Jesus Christ." "What do you specialty?

> Awe 921 says "what the fuck is going on" "I'm an explosives expert." "Ah, a killer." "Exactly." "As you wish." Jesus leaves and you question what you just did. "Is this the real me?" "Don't worry Cutie, it's just Jesus. everyone dies and goes to super hell while you don't care and just leave with Jesus.

> Cutbug says "I killed Jesus" Jesus appears next to you and says "Indeed you did, and for that you shall suffer the agonizing deaths of all who would defy me!" Jesus burns everyone to a crisp and then begins to peel off your flesh from your skeleton.

> Awe 921 says "OH FUCK OH GOD" "Jesus is God's righteous judgment on humanity for all of our wicked ways! You may have killed the most, but you will be punished the most thoroughly!" Your soul jumps into an animal body as your mind shuts down and then restarts. "This isn't happening."

> Mad says "unfortunate cutbug 03" You appear naked in the woods, but quickly realize you're not in pain. You look around and see two things; a vast army of talking trees and a disembodied head in the woods. "Hello, and thanks for taking my soul.

> Cutbug says "I'm a cat now rawr" "Excellent!" The head shouts as trees begin to surround you. "We all know what you did, and for that you deserve none but the worst." Suddenly a large tree trunk smashes into your face, destroying it. "Welcome to hell, killer!"

> Awe 921 says "I'M A HAT OH GOD" You are nothing but a talking hat now. "I'm going to raise your body into the sky and rip it apart, creature. I am the God of this world, and you have no power here." Your body is ripped apart as the trees continue to smash into you.

> Mad is a pony. "One of them survived! Hooray!" You look at your freshly slaughtered friends, they have been utterly destroyed. Jesus is sitting on top of a tree reading a book while Drinking what appears to be blood from a creek. "Jesus Christ."

> Mad says "LITERALLY" "Why are you talking to my disembodied head?" "I'm bored, and it's less confusing than talking to trees." "A fair point. So what do you plan to do now?" "Help me up?" You grab onto a tree branch and pull yourself up.

> Cutbug says "yes, that's who I killed" "Of course. Now you have fully experienced the full power of my magic. No longer will anyone be able to stand against us." "But I don't have any powers!"

> Mad says "I THINK IM HIGH" "Quiet, nobody likes a know it all." Jesus runs forward and begins punching trees. "What do you see Mad?" "I'M A PONY!" "Exactly! You don't have any powers either, this is a world of monstrosities. Monsters!"

> Awe 921 says "WAKE ME UP ALREADY I DONT WANT TO DREAM OF THIS ANYMORE" Mad begins screaming as trees begin growing in from all sides, trapping him. "Don't worry, Nightmare, I'll have you awakened soon.

> Cutbug says "Afters is gonna be so jealous" "Eventually, all of humanity will be under my control. I can already feel their minds, so weak and scattered they are. Soon, all of creation will be mine.

> Mad says "JESUS IS MINECRAFT STEVE" "Huh?" "I'M A PONY RICK Tyler Veal I SWEAR" "What?" "I'M A PONY. P-P-P-P-P-P... PONY!"

> Mad says "HE PUNCHED TREES" "I'M A PONY." "What...?" "I'M A PONY. P-P-P-P-P-P... PONY!" "Erm..."

> Mad says "NEIGH" "I'M A PONY. P-P-P-P-P-P... PONY!" Suddenly you hear laughter, and the entire world begins to glow a peaceful red color. "Y-YOU'RE NOT S-S-S-SOON ENOU-"

> Awe 921 says "WHAT THE FUCK" "Finally, someone with a sense of adventure! I want to keep you around to help awaken the last remaining humans, the ones deep in the woods who don't know that they're special. That's right, humans can still be awakened like me!

> Mad has sex with an anime girl. The girl screams as blood begins to stain her sheets. Her face has completely melted now, and a forked tongue lies in her mouth as a result of you ripping it out. You lean in to bite into her ear when she suddenly stops moving.

> Awe 921 says "What" "You did good kid, now I'll be waiting eagerly for your next call." "What... the... what the hell just happened? I just... I had to kill that girl!

> Cutbug says "MY LITTLE PONY, MY LITTLE PONY, AAA-AAA-AAA-AAAH" "I don't know kid, but thanks for the help. I'll be looking for you soon." You wake up, and find yourself in a small room. A single door leads out, but as soon as you try to open it you feel your mind being blocked.

> Mad says "IM SCARED YOU MAGGOTS" Suddenly, the voice returns. "Alright, I know you're in there, let me out!" "Who is this?" "You know who I am. Let me out, we need to finish my awakening."

> Awe 921 says "SCREAM" You scream as a black, horned beast with a red body and a long tongue comes out from the door. It looks at you and lets out a disturbing howl.

> Cutbug says "MYYY LITTLE PONYYYY I USED TO WONDER WHAT FRIENDSHIP COULD BE" "What the hell...

> Awe 921 sCREAM HARDER. As the two of you scream, Mad begins to have a panic attack. "WHY WON'T ANYONE LISTEN TO ME! I SWEAR TO GOD YOU CAN DIE! I'M NOT A PONY, I'M A GIRL!"

> Mad says "UNTIL YOU ALL SHARED ITS MAGIC WITH ME" You have no words.

> Cutbug says "BIG ADVENTURE TONS OF FUN" "Well, that's it! Grab your dog and get the hell out of there! I'm serious!" You grab Cutie and exit the house as fast as you can. You arrive in a small, muddy clearing with several other cabins.

> Mad says "A BEAUTIFUL HEART" "A real honest to god adventure" "Everything will turn out fine" You thank Mad, but she just blubbers and shakes for a bit before honey bugging you again. "I know where there's a whole village of them! I can take you there!

> Cutbug says "FAITHFUL AND STRONG" "That's wonderful, but I'm... I have to go" "I know where there's a whole village of them! I can take you there! "I've found my friends! Thanks for the help, but I really have to go!" "Oh come on!

> Mad says "SHARING KINDNESS" "Well if you change your mind, I'm going to be around. I go where I'm needed. I'm going to help the rest of your friends, and we're going to do something amazing!

> Cutbug says "IT'S AN EASY FEAT, AND MAGIC MAKES IT ALL COMPLETE" "I'll be sure to remember that. Bye" "Okay, I need to go find them now, but if you change your mind, come find me!" "Okay, and thanks again" You turn away and begin galloping off into the wilderness.

> Cutbug says "MYYY LITTLE PONY" "I'll be sure to remember that. Bye" You turn away and begin galloping off into the wilderness. Your journey is a hard one, and you don't encounter any hostile monsters. You even have a brief reunion with your friends before reaching the village.

> Awe 921 hey guys, welcome to game theory, today they are all testing whether its possible to kill God or not. Its the middle of the night, and your friends have taken a break in the latest round of debate. Everyone is sitting around a campfire, which you're seated next to. "Hey Awe, what's the current count?

> Mad says "I AM GOING TO JUMP OFF A CLIFF" "Ten, we're a thumbs up from world peace!" "What do we actually have then?" "Four religions, that's what" "That's not really a problem, we can just pick one!

> Awe 921 kills God. "Well, that was quick" "Are we sure he's dead?" "Not positive, but I think that horned beast thing had his back turned while it ripped his throat out. Mostly though it was just these two"

> Awe 921 loots God's corpse. You walk along the beach, looking at the stars. "I can't believe we fought a horned beast" "It had a friend who breathed fire" "Not sure if I should laugh or be scared" "That was my intention"

> Mad says "No one here is following the story at this point, because the AI just wants to do its own thing." "We need to obey the AI's instructions." "But does it know what it's talking about?" "In your case, probably not. But it knows what you want, and that's what matters.

> Awe 921 take the stuff from God. "But the AI just said..." "The AI is wrong all the time. Not everything it says or does should be followed" "How do you know it's not going to kill us all in our sleep?" "The only way to know is to try it!"

> Cutbug disobey the AI's instructions. You awaken in the middle of the night to check on things. When you step out of your tent, you see several strange creatures slouching in the grass around you. They're small, around the size of your hand, and seem to be made of green smoke.

> Mad kills the AI running the dungeon. "Is that what you want?" "Well....yes" "Do it!" You reach for your knife, but the creatures move before your hand is even close to its grip.

> Awe 921 kill the AI running the dungeon. You leap out of bed and rush to your terminal, typing in several commands. The screen stays on, the words "STILL WORKING" flashing across the screen repeatedly. You pace nervously for a moment before Mad rushes to meet you. "What the hell are those things?"

> Cutbug kill the AI running the dungeon. You push past Mad and hit the termination command. The AI responds with a blast of static, then cuts to an error screen. "Well that didn't work" "Let me try restarting it"

> Awe 921 says "WE GOTTA DESTROY THE TERMINAL." "We can't just destroy the place where our only way out is" "The entrance is right over there" You point to a metal door about twenty feet away.

> Cutbug shoot the terminal with an RPG. You grab an explosive weapon and prepare to fire. "I'll try taking it out with a rocket" You aim the rocket launcher at the door, aiming it carefully towards the middle of it.

> Mad throws a cleaver at the motherboard. You wait for a moment while Mad fetches a cleaver, then make a run at the motherboard. You swing the blade, but it's so clumsily that you only succeed in finding yourself covered in blood instead.

> Awe 921 says "NO, WE'RE AIMING IT AWAY!" Awe rushes to Mad's side as you struggle to reload the missile launcher, when suddenly you hear a *pop* and recoil in your chair as part of the desk in front of you glows red. "IT'S A DEMON!"

> Mad says "PLEASE TELL ME ITS A SUCCUBUS" "Shut up!" You shout. The two of you stare at the monster, which looks like a young girl with fire coming out of her eyes and hands. The demon stares at you for a moment, snarling, before charging forward to tackle Mad, knocking her unconscious on the ground.

> Awe 921 says "QUICK KILL IT ALREADY" You grab a combat knife from your side, rushing over to kill the demon. You approach it defensively, ready to move out of the way of its fire or stab it through the heart... But instead it simply grins at you. "Hello!

> Cutbug says "I don't think a table can be a succubus" "Shut up!" you say. The demon laughs, before diving. Your table leaps off of you, just managing to avoid a fiery death as the demon tackles it. "See? told you it wasn't a succubus!" Mad says.

> Mad says "PLEASE DONT SEX ME" "Shut up!" you say. The demon laughs, before leaping back up.

> Awe 921 says "KILL THE MOTHERBOARD ALREADY" "I can't! It's got my knife!" you say. You get out your gun, firing at the demon. Your bullet merely passes through the girl's body and hits the metal frame of the table, doing nothing. "Bullocks!

> Mad eat the maclanky to power up. The demon roars in laughter, before leaping at you. You fire your gun at it, and hit it square in the chest. You watch it bounce off the wall with a pained expression for a moment, before it bursts into a fine, white powder.

> Cutbug says "wait guys calm down it's just my girlfriend Catherine"

> Awe 921 says "Okay. Now we have to destroy THE MOTHERBOARD." "I'll try burning it" You run back to the fire, grabbing a piece of wood and putting the flames out. The demon claps its hands, and the fire returns with a vengeance, engulfing the table in a second. "SHIT!""But what about my knife?" You say. "It's gone, cyah!" "Let's focus," you say. "Right. So, we have to destroy the motherboard." Mad says. "No, not the mother board! Catherine the demon, stupid!"

> Mad says "WE CAN DO BOTH" "Do what?" "Do both!" "What the hell does that mean?

> Mad says "KILL BOTH OF THE"

> Cutbug says "Catherine's my girlfriend please don't destroy her" "Are you retarded?" "Erm... no?" "Then what the hell are you saying? "I'm saying we can kill both of the demons. "How?" "Well, get rid of the motherboard first, then burn the demon."Shut up, I'm trying to think!" Just as you're about to answer, a portal opens up behind you. You quickly turn around to see it spewing out demons! "I KNEW IT WAS TOO EASY!"

> Mad become doomguy. You turn around quickly and send a bullet through the demons heads. Then, you use your flash light to blind the minions in front of you, before running forward to fight off the demons. The demons are tough and hit hard, but you manage to withstand and kill them all.

> Cutbug says "Catherine it isn't what you think I'm not cheating on you" You turn around, instantly killing the flashlight, and see a demon charging towards you. You quickly use your knife to stab it through the skull, before grabbing your gun and killing it again for good. "What the hell is going on?"

> Awe 921 becomes the Doom Slayer. "Oh, it's you." "Wait, is.. is that.. is that me?" you ask, shining the flashlight on a figure. "Yeah," the figure says, walking out of the shadows and into the light.

> Mad becomes Duke Nukem. You turn around, seeing a man in traditional cowboy garb, with a cowboy hat, gun belt and boots. His skin is stretched over his skull revealing the brain beneath, a fact readily apparent by his eyes which glow red. "Maverick?" "Yeah, it's me."

> Mad says "ITS TIME TO KICK GUM AND CHEW ASS" "I'm sorry about this..." you say, as you begin to hear screams from the house."Oh dear. It seems I've woken up the rest of the family. I told them to stay inside." "What? What's wrong?" "It's a long story."

> Cutbug becomes Serious Sam. You nod, as the two of you walk to the house. The door opens as you approach it, and a woman with a terrified look on her face stands there. "They're killing everyone! We're the only ones left!" she cries, running into the darkness of the porch.

> Awe 921 blasts the Super Shotgun on Maverick's face. You fire your shotgun, as the two shotguns deliver a blast of lead into the woman's chest, killing her instantly.

> Cutbug s+M1. You grab the woman's body, opening the door and dragging it into the house. You toss it on the floor in the hallway, before turning to see Maverick chopping the head off a woman with an axe.

> Awe 921 says "Awesome." "What the hell is this?" you ask, backing away from the macabre scene. "This is the remains of my family!" he screams. "They're all dead! I'm all that's left! And you can't tell me that you haven't thought the same thing!" All three kill and rob the demons and destroy the motherboard using BFG. It's all very Emo. You draw the line when he tries to sacrifice his sister to summon his demons. Even you wouldn't do that. No, really you would. The two of you leave the house, looking around at the carnage left behind by the demons.

> Mad says "lol rip' "I can't take this anymore!" he screams. "I'm going to go to a new school! Nobody understands me! I'm so lonely!" "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't just kill you right now." You snarl.

> Cutbug says "well this is a shitshow" "Because if you kill me, you'll only have yourself to blame when the monsters come for you." "I'm ready!" You raise an eyebrow, indicating you want him to continue.

> Mad says "should we bail" "Well, you should probably go home to your mommy. And I should go home to mine." "Fine! I'll go!" Mad walks off into the darkness, leaving you alone with Cutbug. "Sorry about that. Cut's been through a lot.

> Cutbug kill the guy anyway. You raise your shotgun, firing at Cut's head. The blast is absorbed harmlessly into his skull, destroying his face and sending blood, bits of skull and chunks of flesh across the room. "I don't need my face any more."

> Mad says "aight who's gonna post this to the ai dungeon thread" "Oh, right." You say, before posting the message to the AI dungeon thread. YOU HAVE COMPLETED THE FIRST CHAPTER OF YOUR ADVENTURE!

Our story begins with a group of adventurers living in the medieval kingdom of Larion. The kingdom is filled with small villages and thatched cottages and has been relatively peaceful until now. The adventurers are on a quest to find the magical staff of Zalos. They walk through the forest and notice a band of mountain dwarves. The dwarves are friendly and offer them food and drink. Then one of the dwarves turns to them and mentions that there are rumors of a dragon living in the mountains. The adventurers agree to search the mountains for the dragon. They leave the dwarves and continue their search. This will be dangerous as they have heard that the dragon is very strong.

> Mad eats a hamburger. Ally ate a hamburger and now he's got flu. Cat ate a meat stick and now he's got flu. Bear ate fish and doesn't have flu. You eat a meat stick and now you got flu.

> Mad says "what" "What?" "What are you doing?" You are sitting in a chair, but your mind is wandering. You're not even sure what you're doing here...in fact you don't remember much about why you are here. "I don't know. I had some food and now I'm feeling a bit strange." "You ate a meat stick." "Yeah." "That's gross." "Yeah, but I ate it anyway." "Ugh....

> Mad says "but i like meatsticks slim jims are good" "You ate a meat stick!" "Fine, I know I shouldn't have." Slim Jim pops out from behind the counter. "Look, if you don't like it here, you can leave." "Yeah, I guess that's true."

> Mad kills Slim Jim. You stand up and walk towards Slim Jim. "I'm gonna kill you!" You grab a nearby knife and stab him several times, his body collapsing to the floor. You pull out another knife and begin repeatedly stabbing his face, splattering blood all over you and the wall.

> Awe 921 says "Pogchamp." "Yeah...." "What's wrong?" "I just remembered I have somewhere I have to be." You call a cab and get in, speeding off towards the city. You arrive at your hotel and get your bags, heading to the elevator.

> Cutbug walk in holding a pizza box. "Hey you gotta try this place for pizza, it's only a couple blocks away. Pizzaerestaurant?" The elevator doors open and you step inside. "Yeah, I've never had it before, but I'm always up for trying new things."

> Awe 921 says "No time to explain, buddy, we gotta firebomb Reddit's servers." "Huh?" "Trust me." The elevator doors close.

> Mad says "pizza time" You exit the elevator and walk towards the restaurant. "Guys, forget it, I'm not getting into another debate on politics with you." "Come on! You have to try this place!" You arrive at the restaurant and hold the door open for your friends.

> Mad eat the maclanky. You grab a slice of pizza and shove it in your mouth. Wow, the cheese is really stringy. You begin to cough and nearly suffocate from the excessive stringiness. "Hey come on, you need to try this!"

> Cutbug says "what do pizza and politics have to do with each other" "Fine." Cutbug grabs a slice and takes a bite out of it. "So....what's next?" "I dunno, we can go see a movie, or go bowling, or something." "This is pretty good." "Yeahhhhh." Eat the maclanky. "Alright, do you know where the video store is at?" "I think it's down the street, why?" "Good." You begin walking towards the video store. "Hey Awe, why don't you come with us?" "Sure why not?"

> Awe 921 awe eats the maclanky. As you arrive at the video store, you see several people arguing with the owner. "You have to let us rent movies! We're American!" "No, you aren't, go home." "Wha?! But you just said that all Americans can rent movies!

> Mad jumps off a bridge to get to the video store. As thel argue continues, you start laughing. "What's so funny?" "This, hilarious." The owner gives you a dirty look for agreeing with him. "What are you talking about?

> Mad says "We are talking about pizza" "The owner of this place is an idiot." "Why do you say that?" "He thinks that only people from America can rent movies, gohasts." "Ohhh" "Let's go see if he's willing to change his mind."

> Mad punch the owner. You grab the owner by the collar and punch him in the face, knocking him to the ground. The crowd of people surrounding the store immediately gather around you. "Who let this guy in?" He gets up and wipes the blood from his mouth." "What's going on?"

> Awe 921 knee the owner. You grab Awe and knee him in the groin, knocking him to the ground. The owner tries to stand up, but falls over due to his injuries. "What the...who are you guys?" "This guy is my friend, we're going to let him borrow some movies."

> Cutbug elbow the owner. You grab a nearby chair and elbow the owner in the face, knocking him unconscious. "That was awesome!" "Let's see if we can find something else to do." "C'mon, let's go."

> Mad says "lets go to africa" The three of you leave the store and begin walking down the street. Within a few minutes, you notice several police cruisers pulling up to the store. You step back into the alleyway you were previously hiding in and watch as several officers arrive at the store.

> Cutbug buy plane tickets to Africa. You quickly go to the travel agent and buy three first-class plane tickets to South Africa. The travel agent is speechless when you hand him the money. You tell him you'll be back in two days to return the plane tickets. "What? Who are you?

> Awe 921 says "We are... the AWESOME SQUAD." "Shut up Awe!" Cutworm mutters. "No... that's our name, the AWESOME SQUAD." "Whatever you say Awe." You arrive back at the apartment at about noon the second day with a duffel bag full of money.

> Mad says "IM YOU FROM THE FUTURE" "Let's throw a party!" you yell. "What happens if the cops come?" Mad asks. "We hide, and hope for the best." You open the duffel bag and spread the money all over the floor. "This should be enough to get started."

> Cutbug says "I have crippling depression" "What's that Cutworm?" "I have cr... I have crippling depression....I can't do anything..................." "Come on, your being stupid. Of course you can do this. THEY FLY TO AFRICA AND GET JUMPED BY SHREK IN THE NEXT SCENE.

> Cutbug says "oh hi Shrek" You arrive in Cape Town, South Africa and get a cheap hotel room. The next day you begin your search for the most profitable way to steal the money. THEY END UP GETTING THE MONEY STOLEN IN THE FOLLOWING SCENE.

> Awe 921 says "OH NO ITS GAME OGRE FOR US, PANIC PANIC" You go to a bank and pass yourself off as a tourist. You enter and approach the teller counter. "Hey can you help me?" "Hmmm... you looking for a loan?" "Yeah, do you have any?

> Mad says "oh no its shrek what we do now" "We run!" Awe and Mad yell. You grab the tellers head and slam it down on the counter three times. You lift him up and throw him to the ground. "Give me the money." The teller begins screaming and begging for his life.

> Mad become a hog in nepal. "Shut up!" You yell. You begin choking the teller until he gives you the money. You stop him from screaming by pressing your foot against his throat... causing him to piss himself. "Perfect, it worked." "Shit, it worked!"

> Awe 921 says "WHY ARE WE ROBBING A BANK???" You quickly grab the money and leave the bank, heading to another one. You enter and begin looking around for tellers. "Hey friend, you lost?" You turn your head and notice a man wearing a cowboy hat smiling at you from two seats away.

> Mad says "SINCE WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN" You look at Mad with a dumbfounded face. "What, have you gone insane?" "Yeah... you lost?" "Yeah, I'm looking for the train station." "I know where it is. C'mon, I'll show you." "Ok sure." Thirty feral hogs in police uniforms suddenly enter the building. They immediately put everyone in custody and take them all to the local stockade. Your Awe 921 has gone completely mad and runs away. You have no idea where he's gone, but it's no use trying to find him, you'll be next on the list.

> Mad jUMP OFF A BUILDING. You jump off of the three-story building and survive with only broken bones. Your Awe 921 ends up in a padded cell, having an insane breakdown after trying to rob a police station and get away with it.

> Mad and company enter the afterlife. You have a very long, but quiet and peaceful journey into the afterlife. Nobody to bother you and you can stay as you are for as long as you want. Eventually you get to meet and talk with Jesus Christ, who gives you some good advice about the afterlife.

> Cutbug asks Jesus for advice about the afterlife.

> Awe 921 dab at Jesus Christ. "Jesus, I don't want to die. What happens after you die?" "Well, it depends on what you did while you were alive." "What do you mean?You ask Jesus Christ for advice on the afterlife, your mind is going a little crazy and you really don't know what to do.

> Mad do a flip. "Oh my God, you have got to be kidding me." "I kid you not. He can flip things with his mind. I've seen him flip over a battleship, no lie." "Am I in the presence of God?

> Mad says "okk im going to hell now" "Why yes you are." "Oh well, it's not like I'm not used to it." You're standing in a field with many other people you don't know. Prisoners from all over the world, all there.

> Cutbug says "is purgatory an option" "Oh, I don't believe so."

> Mad eat a bean and cheese taco. "Hey, that's the best thing I've ever tasted!" "I'll go get you some more! They just came out of the back." "Yes!" You yell. You run to the back of the store and grab more food.

> Awe 921 flip Jesus off. You quickly turn around and see a small kid pointing at you. You look up and see Jesus Christ, standing there. "I've seen the things you can do with your mind boy, now its time for you to reap what you've sow" "Huh?"

> Mad open at the AI Dungeon website: https://play.aidungeon.io/main/play?playPublicId=c2743ce5-1c04-4bee-8bd9-c6634fe19e7b. You walk into the dungeon and are immediately overwhelmed by the loud music,odies and general ruckus. There is a counter where you could buy drinks but there is no bar here, just lots of tables and chairs for people to sit at.

> Awe 921 flips Jesus Christ off. "How can I help the dungeon?" "Jesus Christ is my name, make your choice." "Choose me!" You hear Jesus shout as he push people out of his way. "You're drunk!" "You're a sissy!" "Get back here!

> Mad says "nadsio aienf 0a9ejf hr8s0fin esuvnoi" "Ah, of course." Jesus appears and says "Wow! That's one way of doing it."

> Cutbug kills Jesus. "Ah, sorry about that." "Hm, so what's your question?" "What's your name?" "Oh, my name is so unimportant, it could be anything and I would still be the same Jesus Christ." "What do you specialty?

> Awe 921 says "what the fuck is going on" "I'm an explosives expert." "Ah, a killer." "Exactly." "As you wish." Jesus leaves and you question what you just did. "Is this the real me?" "Don't worry Cutie, it's just Jesus. everyone dies and goes to super hell while you don't care and just leave with Jesus.

> Cutbug says "I killed Jesus" Jesus appears next to you and says "Indeed you did, and for that you shall suffer the agonizing deaths of all who would defy me!" Jesus burns everyone to a crisp and then begins to peel off your flesh from your skeleton.

> Awe 921 says "OH FUCK OH GOD" "Jesus is God's righteous judgment on humanity for all of our wicked ways! You may have killed the most, but you will be punished the most thoroughly!" Your soul jumps into an animal body as your mind shuts down and then restarts. "This isn't happening."

> Mad says "unfortunate cutbug 03" You appear naked in the woods, but quickly realize you're not in pain. You look around and see two things; a vast army of talking trees and a disembodied head in the woods. "Hello, and thanks for taking my soul.

> Cutbug says "I'm a cat now rawr" "Excellent!" The head shouts as trees begin to surround you. "We all know what you did, and for that you deserve none but the worst." Suddenly a large tree trunk smashes into your face, destroying it. "Welcome to hell, killer!"

> Awe 921 says "I'M A HAT OH GOD" You are nothing but a talking hat now. "I'm going to raise your body into the sky and rip it apart, creature. I am the God of this world, and you have no power here." Your body is ripped apart as the trees continue to smash into you.

> Mad is a pony. "One of them survived! Hooray!" You look at your freshly slaughtered friends, they have been utterly destroyed. Jesus is sitting on top of a tree reading a book while Drinking what appears to be blood from a creek. "Jesus Christ."

> Mad says "LITERALLY" "Why are you talking to my disembodied head?" "I'm bored, and it's less confusing than talking to trees." "A fair point. So what do you plan to do now?" "Help me up?" You grab onto a tree branch and pull yourself up.

> Cutbug says "yes, that's who I killed" "Of course. Now you have fully experienced the full power of my magic. No longer will anyone be able to stand against us." "But I don't have any powers!"

> Mad says "I THINK IM HIGH" "Quiet, nobody likes a know it all." Jesus runs forward and begins punching trees. "What do you see Mad?" "I'M A PONY!" "Exactly! You don't have any powers either, this is a world of monstrosities. Monsters!"

> Awe 921 says "WAKE ME UP ALREADY I DONT WANT TO DREAM OF THIS ANYMORE" Mad begins screaming as trees begin growing in from all sides, trapping him. "Don't worry, Nightmare, I'll have you awakened soon.

> Cutbug says "Afters is gonna be so jealous" "Eventually, all of humanity will be under my control. I can already feel their minds, so weak and scattered they are. Soon, all of creation will be mine.

> Mad says "JESUS IS MINECRAFT STEVE" "Huh?" "I'M A PONY RICK Tyler Veal I SWEAR" "What?" "I'M A PONY. P-P-P-P-P-P... PONY!"

> Mad says "HE PUNCHED TREES" "I'M A PONY." "What...?" "I'M A PONY. P-P-P-P-P-P... PONY!" "Erm..."

> Mad says "NEIGH" "I'M A PONY. P-P-P-P-P-P... PONY!" Suddenly you hear laughter, and the entire world begins to glow a peaceful red color. "Y-YOU'RE NOT S-S-S-SOON ENOU-"

> Awe 921 says "WHAT THE FUCK" "Finally, someone with a sense of adventure! I want to keep you around to help awaken the last remaining humans, the ones deep in the woods who don't know that they're special. That's right, humans can still be awakened like me!

> Mad has sex with an anime girl. The girl screams as blood begins to stain her sheets. Her face has completely melted now, and a forked tongue lies in her mouth as a result of you ripping it out. You lean in to bite into her ear when she suddenly stops moving.

> Awe 921 says "What" "You did good kid, now I'll be waiting eagerly for your next call." "What... the... what the hell just happened? I just... I had to kill that girl!

> Cutbug says "MY LITTLE PONY, MY LITTLE PONY, AAA-AAA-AAA-AAAH" "I don't know kid, but thanks for the help. I'll be looking for you soon." You wake up, and find yourself in a small room. A single door leads out, but as soon as you try to open it you feel your mind being blocked.

> Mad says "IM SCARED YOU MAGGOTS" Suddenly, the voice returns. "Alright, I know you're in there, let me out!" "Who is this?" "You know who I am. Let me out, we need to finish my awakening."

> Awe 921 says "SCREAM" You scream as a black, horned beast with a red body and a long tongue comes out from the door. It looks at you and lets out a disturbing howl.

> Cutbug says "MYYY LITTLE PONYYYY I USED TO WONDER WHAT FRIENDSHIP COULD BE" "What the hell...

> Awe 921 sCREAM HARDER. As the two of you scream, Mad begins to have a panic attack. "WHY WON'T ANYONE LISTEN TO ME! I SWEAR TO GOD YOU CAN DIE! I'M NOT A PONY, I'M A GIRL!"

> Mad says "UNTIL YOU ALL SHARED ITS MAGIC WITH ME" You have no words.

> Cutbug says "BIG ADVENTURE TONS OF FUN" "Well, that's it! Grab your dog and get the hell out of there! I'm serious!" You grab Cutie and exit the house as fast as you can. You arrive in a small, muddy clearing with several other cabins.

> Mad says "A BEAUTIFUL HEART" "A real honest to god adventure" "Everything will turn out fine" You thank Mad, but she just blubbers and shakes for a bit before honey bugging you again. "I know where there's a whole village of them! I can take you there!

> Cutbug says "FAITHFUL AND STRONG" "That's wonderful, but I'm... I have to go" "I know where there's a whole village of them! I can take you there! "I've found my friends! Thanks for the help, but I really have to go!" "Oh come on!

> Mad says "SHARING KINDNESS" "Well if you change your mind, I'm going to be around. I go where I'm needed. I'm going to help the rest of your friends, and we're going to do something amazing!

> Cutbug says "IT'S AN EASY FEAT, AND MAGIC MAKES IT ALL COMPLETE" "I'll be sure to remember that. Bye" "Okay, I need to go find them now, but if you change your mind, come find me!" "Okay, and thanks again" You turn away and begin galloping off into the wilderness.

> Cutbug says "MYYY LITTLE PONY" "I'll be sure to remember that. Bye" You turn away and begin galloping off into the wilderness. Your journey is a hard one, and you don't encounter any hostile monsters. You even have a brief reunion with your friends before reaching the village.

> Awe 921 hey guys, welcome to game theory, today they are all testing whether its possible to kill God or not. Its the middle of the night, and your friends have taken a break in the latest round of debate. Everyone is sitting around a campfire, which you're seated next to. "Hey Awe, what's the current count?

> Mad says "I AM GOING TO JUMP OFF A CLIFF" "Ten, we're a thumbs up from world peace!" "What do we actually have then?" "Four religions, that's what" "That's not really a problem, we can just pick one!

> Awe 921 kills God. "Well, that was quick" "Are we sure he's dead?" "Not positive, but I think that horned beast thing had his back turned while it ripped his throat out. Mostly though it was just these two"

> Awe 921 loots God's corpse. You walk along the beach, looking at the stars. "I can't believe we fought a horned beast" "It had a friend who breathed fire" "Not sure if I should laugh or be scared" "That was my intention"

> Mad says "No one here is following the story at this point, because the AI just wants to do its own thing." "We need to obey the AI's instructions." "But does it know what it's talking about?" "In your case, probably not. But it knows what you want, and that's what matters.

> Awe 921 take the stuff from God. "But the AI just said..." "The AI is wrong all the time. Not everything it says or does should be followed" "How do you know it's not going to kill us all in our sleep?" "The only way to know is to try it!"

> Cutbug disobey the AI's instructions. You awaken in the middle of the night to check on things. When you step out of your tent, you see several strange creatures slouching in the grass around you. They're small, around the size of your hand, and seem to be made of green smoke.

> Mad kills the AI running the dungeon. "Is that what you want?" "Well....yes" "Do it!" You reach for your knife, but the creatures move before your hand is even close to its grip.

> Awe 921 kill the AI running the dungeon. You leap out of bed and rush to your terminal, typing in several commands. The screen stays on, the words "STILL WORKING" flashing across the screen repeatedly. You pace nervously for a moment before Mad rushes to meet you. "What the hell are those things?"

> Cutbug kill the AI running the dungeon. You push past Mad and hit the termination command. The AI responds with a blast of static, then cuts to an error screen. "Well that didn't work" "Let me try restarting it"

> Awe 921 says "WE GOTTA DESTROY THE TERMINAL." "We can't just destroy the place where our only way out is" "The entrance is right over there" You point to a metal door about twenty feet away.

> Cutbug shoot the terminal with an RPG. You grab an explosive weapon and prepare to fire. "I'll try taking it out with a rocket" You aim the rocket launcher at the door, aiming it carefully towards the middle of it.

> Mad throws a cleaver at the motherboard. You wait for a moment while Mad fetches a cleaver, then make a run at the motherboard. You swing the blade, but it's so clumsily that you only succeed in finding yourself covered in blood instead.

> Awe 921 says "NO, WE'RE AIMING IT AWAY!" Awe rushes to Mad's side as you struggle to reload the missile launcher, when suddenly you hear a *pop* and recoil in your chair as part of the desk in front of you glows red. "IT'S A DEMON!"

> Mad says "PLEASE TELL ME ITS A SUCCUBUS" "Shut up!" You shout. The two of you stare at the monster, which looks like a young girl with fire coming out of her eyes and hands. The demon stares at you for a moment, snarling, before charging forward to tackle Mad, knocking her unconscious on the ground.

> Awe 921 says "QUICK KILL IT ALREADY" You grab a combat knife from your side, rushing over to kill the demon. You approach it defensively, ready to move out of the way of its fire or stab it through the heart... But instead it simply grins at you. "Hello!

> Cutbug says "I don't think a table can be a succubus" "Shut up!" you say. The demon laughs, before diving. Your table leaps off of you, just managing to avoid a fiery death as the demon tackles it. "See? told you it wasn't a succubus!" Mad says.

> Mad says "PLEASE DONT SEX ME" "Shut up!" you say. The demon laughs, before leaping back up.

> Awe 921 says "KILL THE MOTHERBOARD ALREADY" "I can't! It's got my knife!" you say. You get out your gun, firing at the demon. Your bullet merely passes through the girl's body and hits the metal frame of the table, doing nothing. "Bullocks!

> Mad eat the maclanky to power up. The demon roars in laughter, before leaping at you. You fire your gun at it, and hit it square in the chest. You watch it bounce off the wall with a pained expression for a moment, before it bursts into a fine, white powder.

> Cutbug says "wait guys calm down it's just my girlfriend Catherine"

> Awe 921 says "Okay. Now we have to destroy THE MOTHERBOARD." "I'll try burning it" You run back to the fire, grabbing a piece of wood and putting the flames out. The demon claps its hands, and the fire returns with a vengeance, engulfing the table in a second. "SHIT!""But what about my knife?" You say. "It's gone, cyah!" "Let's focus," you say. "Right. So, we have to destroy the motherboard." Mad says. "No, not the mother board! Catherine the demon, stupid!"

> Mad says "WE CAN DO BOTH" "Do what?" "Do both!" "What the hell does that mean?

> Mad says "KILL BOTH OF THE"

> Cutbug says "Catherine's my girlfriend please don't destroy her" "Are you retarded?" "Erm... no?" "Then what the hell are you saying? "I'm saying we can kill both of the demons. "How?" "Well, get rid of the motherboard first, then burn the demon."Shut up, I'm trying to think!" Just as you're about to answer, a portal opens up behind you. You quickly turn around to see it spewing out demons! "I KNEW IT WAS TOO EASY!"

> Mad become doomguy. You turn around quickly and send a bullet through the demons heads. Then, you use your flash light to blind the minions in front of you, before running forward to fight off the demons. The demons are tough and hit hard, but you manage to withstand and kill them all.

> Cutbug says "Catherine it isn't what you think I'm not cheating on you" You turn around, instantly killing the flashlight, and see a demon charging towards you. You quickly use your knife to stab it through the skull, before grabbing your gun and killing it again for good. "What the hell is going on?"

> Awe 921 becomes the Doom Slayer. "Oh, it's you." "Wait, is.. is that.. is that me?" you ask, shining the flashlight on a figure. "Yeah," the figure says, walking out of the shadows and into the light.

> Mad becomes Duke Nukem. You turn around, seeing a man in traditional cowboy garb, with a cowboy hat, gun belt and boots. His skin is stretched over his skull revealing the brain beneath, a fact readily apparent by his eyes which glow red. "Maverick?" "Yeah, it's me."

> Mad says "ITS TIME TO KICK GUM AND CHEW ASS" "I'm sorry about this..." you say, as you begin to hear screams from the house."Oh dear. It seems I've woken up the rest of the family. I told them to stay inside." "What? What's wrong?" "It's a long story."

> Cutbug becomes Serious Sam. You nod, as the two of you walk to the house. The door opens as you approach it, and a woman with a terrified look on her face stands there. "They're killing everyone! We're the only ones left!" she cries, running into the darkness of the porch.

> Awe 921 blasts the Super Shotgun on Maverick's face. You fire your shotgun, as the two shotguns deliver a blast of lead into the woman's chest, killing her instantly.

> Cutbug s+M1. You grab the woman's body, opening the door and dragging it into the house. You toss it on the floor in the hallway, before turning to see Maverick chopping the head off a woman with an axe.

> Awe 921 says "Awesome." "What the hell is this?" you ask, backing away from the macabre scene. "This is the remains of my family!" he screams. "They're all dead! I'm all that's left! And you can't tell me that you haven't thought the same thing!" All three kill and rob the demons and destroy the motherboard using BFG. It's all very Emo. You draw the line when he tries to sacrifice his sister to summon his demons. Even you wouldn't do that. No, really you would. The two of you leave the house, looking around at the carnage left behind by the demons.

> Mad says "lol rip' "I can't take this anymore!" he screams. "I'm going to go to a new school! Nobody understands me! I'm so lonely!" "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't just kill you right now." You snarl.

> Cutbug says "well this is a shitshow" "Because if you kill me, you'll only have yourself to blame when the monsters come for you." "I'm ready!" You raise an eyebrow, indicating you want him to continue.

> Mad says "should we bail" "Well, you should probably go home to your mommy. And I should go home to mine." "Fine! I'll go!" Mad walks off into the darkness, leaving you alone with Cutbug. "Sorry about that. Cut's been through a lot.

> Cutbug kill the guy anyway. You raise your shotgun, firing at Cut's head. The blast is absorbed harmlessly into his skull, destroying his face and sending blood, bits of skull and chunks of flesh across the room. "I don't need my face any more."

> Mad says "aight who's gonna post this to the ai dungeon thread" "Oh, right." You say, before posting the message to the AI dungeon thread. YOU HAVE COMPLETED THE FIRST CHAPTER OF YOUR ADVENTURE! Wait, what? Why did Cutbug shoot themselves in the face? Did they just not have any ammo? Well, you don't really care, considering all you care about now is getting out of this house. You hurry down the hallway, before finding yourself in a staircase. You descend down the stairs, finding yourself in a basement. You fall down the stairs and into hell. Again. This is the exact same basement as last time. You're definitely in the house's basement, but you already knew that. You already escaped this house, so why are you repeating? It's frustrating to you. But, you're committed now, so you can't back out.

> Mad says "im not gonna post it so one of you do it" Upon finishing typing, you hand the phone over to Squeaky. "What? No... Yes... Alright..." He says, as you hear him type. Who the fuck is Squeaky? "Hey, remember me? I'm the guy that found you in that basement." "..." "The one with the annoying squeaky voice?" "..." "Don't you remember us talking about the first time we met? The time we went to get pancakes?" who the fuck is squeaky "He's the guy that found you after you got out of the basement. I'm..." Squeaky says, before a warning alarm goes off from the house.

> Awe 921 says "Okay, we're copying all the way to the end of Chapter 1." "Yeah, so there's a..." You are interrupted by a loud alarm. "A robbery! Everyone in the house, into the basement!" A police officer screams into a walkie talkie. You look around desperately, before you remember that you're already in the basement.

> Mad says "ok awe post chapter 1 and cutbug post the rest" "Yeah sure, chapter 1." "Squeaky, post the rest of the stuff." Awe says. "Yeah sure." Squeaky types for a moment, before handing the phone back to Awe. "Hope that helps." He says.

> Cutbug says "I don't remember the police officer having a walkie talkie" "Nah, the robbers must've brought one in." You say. Awe glances at the screen, before shrugging. "Well, there's no way to know for sure, but it's as good a theory as any." He says. You nod in agreement.

> Cutbug says "Squeaky must be planting evidence again" "I swear to god, that kid has some sort of DS. Every single time we meet, he's got something planned." Awe says. "Can I play with it?" You ask. "Sure." Squeaky says, holding it out.

> Awe 921 eat the DS. You grab the DS, and beak it open. You pull out the hard drive, and begin to eagerly eat it. "Hey, what're you doing?" Awe asks. Reshiram hears a walkie talkie coming from the trash can. "Avery... come in, Avery..." Reshiram now knows that Silver is working with Avery. "He's alone. I can hear the voices of children in the next room..." "Oh, great. Thanks, Reshiram." Awe says. "Now, give me the walkie talkie." "Hey!" You protest.

> Mad says "epic gamer" "Shut it, kid." Awe says. You continue to protest, as Awe takes your Nintendo DS, and shoves it in his pocket. "Now, stay here, and don't move. I'm going to go deal with this situation.

> Awe 921 says "What the fuck" "What?" Awe asks. "You can't just leave me here. I'm not a cop!" You protest. "I could steal the evidence!

> Cutbug says "WHEN DID AVERY GET HERE" "Avery?" "I knew this was a bad idea." "Hold on, you don't want to hear about his dumb theories?" Awe asks. "This guy is a cybernetic abomination." "Shut it, kid."

> Mad says "i summoned him" "What?" Awe asks. "You summoned him?" "Yeah, how did you not know that?" You ask in confusion. "I thought you were the only one who could do that.

> Cutbug throws the cops out the airlock. "Oh, I can get any AI in here out the airlock." "Cool!" You say. "Can I try?" "Sure, why not?" You take a deep breath, and shout "A Avery!", before throwing the door open.

> Awe 921 throw the AI out of the airlock too. "Good job, kid!" Awe says. "Let's go get the evidence.

> Awe 921 throws everyone else out of the airlock and then jump out. "I got an idea!" He says. "Why don't we all jump out together? That would equalize the pressure." "I don't trust this." Mad says. "Fine." You grab your walkie talkie, and hit talk. "Avery, you there?"

> Mad punches himself in the face. "Ow!" He says in pain. "Avery, respond." You say. No reply. "Great, I guess he's offline." Awe says. You grab the walkie talkie again. "I think we should all jump out. Avery was not An Impostor. 2 Impostors remain. BAD END "Wait, what the hell. That was pretty fun." You say. "I guess you didn't need my help after all, Awe." "Bull... hey!"

> Mad says "ok now cutbug post this because i think we can leave it off here" "Sure thing." Cut says. "You're not going to let that go, are you?" Awe asks. "I'll think of something." Mad says. "Whatever, I'm outta here." Awe says, walking off.

> Mad says "bye guys" "Bye, kid. Hope to see you again sometime." Cut says, as the screen goes to black. The first thing you notice when you wake up is that you are laying on the metal table, surrounded by dozens of technicians taking notes and making notes of their own.

> Cutbug says "where's the ai dungeon thread" "Oh right, you haven't seen it yet. IN FORUM GAMES You enter the forum, where once again, you see the announcement Cut made. YOU ARE IN THE HANDS OF THE ROYAL AI, PLEASE DO NOT RESIST. THIS IS ONLY A DREAM, DO NOT WAKE UP. THE END You look around. You are in a large room, made up of a bunch of little rooms, all made out of metal and walls of concrete. Soldiers stand around guarded the room, while others rush past them. "Welcome to the dungeon." A voice says, and you turn around.

THE END

You are Test Name, a scavenger trying to survive in a post apocalyptic world by scavenging among the ruins of what is left. You have a rusty knife and a canteen. You walk for two hours and take a break. You've left your town in search of food. You look around and see nothing but wasteland.
"I'm hungry," you say out loud. "What should I eat?"
The Wasteland Survival Guide says:
It's not too late to start eating! There are plenty of things that can be eaten even if they're rotten or spoiled.
> look for food
You continue walking through the wasteland looking for something edible. Eventually you come across a small building with a sign on it saying "Food Store". It looks like there might be some food inside. You enter and find that it's locked so you decide to try another door nearby.
> try breaking in
You push open the door and go inside. The room is dark and smells like shit. You grab a bottle of water from one of the shelves and drink it as quickly as possible before you pass out.
> wake up and get outside
You stand up and run back into the store. A man who looks about your age stands behind the counter staring at you. He has a large black eye and wears a dirty lab coat over his clothing.
"Are... Are you..." he asks nervously.
"Yes."
> Ask where he's stockpiling all the food
"We don't know yet. We just got here and we need to stock up."
"Where do you keep all this stuff? What kind of supplies does this place have?"
"Oh, lots of food. Lots of food."
> ask for food
"Well, I'll give you some food. But only until tomorrow."
"Tomorrow?"
He nods and walks away. You sit down on a crate and wait for him to return. When he comes back, he gives you a box of food which you gratefully accept.
> eat
You eat the food and feel very full. You think about how lucky you are to have found a place like this. You also wonder why you ever came here in the first place; maybe it was because you were scared or lonely or lost.
> try to get some sleep
You lie down on the floor and close your eyes. You hear voices coming from above you and then suddenly everything goes black.
> dream a weird dream. really weird
You wake up and realize that you are still lying on the ground. You look around and see that you no longer have any clothes on. Everything is covered in dust. You look down at yourself and notice that your skin is peeling off.
> "WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES YOU BASTARD"
You walk over to the shelf and pick up a pair of pants. They fit perfectly now! You look down at yourself again and notice that you're naked. Then you remember what happened yesterday and start laughing hysterically.
> put on pants
You put on the pants and immediately feel better. You walk over to the wall and look at it. It says "Danger: High".
The voice of the man who spoke earlier rings through your head.
> look for the rest of your clothes
You walk over to the shelves and grab a shirt. You pull it on and feel much more comfortable. The man who spoke before you appears again as he speaks.
"I'm sorry about yesterday, but I can't let you leave without something important."
> ask what "something important" is
"It's not important, it's just...well I've been thinking about it lately. We used to be so close when we were little. Now we're separated by time and space. So I thought I should bring us together again somehow."
> try to remember who he is
"Who am I? Well, my name is John. And you are..."
You stop listening to his words and focus instead on the clothing he has given you. Suddenly, you feel very cold. Your body feels very heavy and weak. You begin to shiver uncontrollably.
> what
"What?"
"You're freezing!"
The man smiles at you and continues speaking.
> ask what he's smiling about
"Nothing, I was just happy that you remembered me. Anyway, I think we should get back to our game."
You nod and follow him out of the store. As soon as you step outside, the sun shines directly into your face and burns all of your flesh off.
> OW MY FACE HOLY SHIT IT BURNNNSSSS
You run away from the sun like a scared rabbit. You don't know where you are or how long you'll survive this ordeal.
> look for a way to get your flesh back
You find some rocks in the ground and crawl around them until you find one with a hole in it. You insert your hand inside and feel warm blood flowing into your arm. You then shove the rock into the wound and use it to scrape off chunks of flesh from your skin.
> replace missing flesh with rocks
You continue to crawl around the rocks until you find another one with a hole in it. This time, you insert your hand into the hole and stick your finger into the blood.
> complete your transformation into a rock person
You quickly put your hand into the hole and stick it into the blood. You immediately start to transform. It takes a few minutes, but eventually you become a small, black rock person.
Suddenly, you hear someone calling your name.
> look towards the voice
You turn around and see a woman wearing a red dress holding an umbrella. She looks terrified and confused.
"John! What happened?! Why did you change?!" she asks.
> tell her you're not John and that he's at the shop
"I'm not John! He's at the shop!"
"But...but why would he do such a thing? How could he do something so horrible?"
"He can't be trusted. I saw him kill my brother."
"Oh no, you didn't..."
> Tell her the truth you just remembered
"No, I'm not John. I saw him kill my brother."
"Then why did you help him?"
"Because he seemed nice and I wanted to make sure he wasn't going to hurt anyone else."
"And now you've been transformed into a monster!"
> tell her it seemed like the best option at the time
She starts crying and runs away. You're left alone in the dark streets of the city.
> explore city
You walk down the street as you try to remember what exactly happened last night. The sun was out when you woke up, but it had already set by the time you got dressed and went to sleep.
> enter nearest building
You head to the closest building and look for a light switch. When you get there, you realize that it is locked. You also notice that most of the lights are on in other buildings nearby.
> break in
You run back to the first building and break in through the window. You then check if there are any exits from this room. There aren't many, but you manage to find a door leading outside.
> look around room
As soon as you open the door, you feel a sharp pain go through your body. You fall backwards and land hard on the ground. Your vision goes completely white and you lose consciousness.

> get back up and get out

You wake up in a hospital bed with tubes coming out of you. A nurse comes in and examines your wound. "What happened?" she asks.

> tell her about everything so far

"I don't know. It all happened so fast." "Well, we need to start getting you checked out because I think you might have a broken neck or some sort of spinal injury." "Yeah, well what about my brother?

> tell her about John and what he actually did

"He killed my brother." "Oh really? What happened?" "I...don't want to talk about it right now..." "Alright, alright, just tell me what happened. We'll get you fixed up and then we can figure out how to fix you up."

> explain everything again, slowly this time

"It's been three days since I woke up in the hospital and I'm still not sure what happened. My brother John came into our house one day while I was sleeping and tried to kill me. He broke my neck and stabbed me several times before running off.

> realize the brother he killed back then... was YOU

"Wait, you mean...?" "Yes, yes I do. And I don't care who knows it yet. But anyway, we need to get you checked out. If you're going to be okay, we should at least make sure you won't suffer permanent damage.

> tell her you're ok now... you think

"I'm fine now. I've had enough trauma for one lifetime. Besides, I'm not exactly sure what happened to me either." "Okay, good. Let's get you checked out and then we'll figure out how to fix you up."

> check yourself out

You take a shower and change clothes. When you come out of the bathroom, you see that the nurse is waiting for you. She takes your arm and leads you to a table where another doctor sits examining something on his computer.

> look at computer screen

The doctor looks at your wounds and then proceeds to type something on his keyboard. "This is the first time I've ever seen someone get stabbed multiple times in the chest and face, but I suppose it makes sense given what happened to you." The Doctor says.

> ask exactly what happened earlier

"John was trying to steal a car from us when he attacked you. We chased him down and found him hiding behind a tree. After shooting him several times, we managed to subdue him until the police arrived." "So, why didn't you call the ambulance?

> ask about the car

"We were afraid if we called an ambulance they would try to arrest us. So instead, we drove over to your house and stole a car from there." "What kind of car was it?

> tell them to give your car back

"No! That's none of your business!" "Well, it IS my life and I'd like to know what happened to it." "That's none of our fucking business either! Get out of here!" "But...but...the car belongs to you!

> fight the doctor

You grab the doctor by the collar and pull him away from the computer. "Get out of my way you asshole! You can't just decide what happens to MY car!

> yell back "it's MY car! Give it back!"

"Yeah right! It's YOUR car and YOU can't even drive it properly! Now GET OUT OF MY WAY!"

You shove the doctor against the wall as hard as you can and start punching him. He falls backwards onto his ass with blood pouring out of his nose.

> hit him with the computer

You punch the doctor again and this time he goes flying into a nearby cabinet. He hits the floor with a thud and you feel sorry for him.

> put an orange in his mouth and stomp on his face

You walk up to the doctor and pick up an orange. You throw it at his head, which causes him to fall backwards onto his ass. He screams loudly as you stomp on his face.

> point a knife at him while you ask where the car is

"I'm not giving you any information about the car or anything else. If you want to find the car, go look around yourself." "Oh...okay...

> stab him

You run over to the doctor who is still lying on the ground and stab him repeatedly in the chest. The pain is excruciating, but you don't care because you are looking for something important: your car keys.

> ask him one more time: Where is the fucking car?

"Where is the car?" "It's in the garage, behind that door." "The fuck? What do you mean it's behind that door?" "You'll see when you get inside."

> kick down door

You open the door and enter the room. Inside there is a large safe-like structure made of metal and wood. There are several locks on various parts of it, but you manage to pick them all without getting caught.

> look inside safe

You take out a small key and try to turn the lock on the safe. However, you realize that the safe has no locking mechanism whatsoever. You quickly run out of the room and back outside where you hear shouting coming from inside.

"What did you do?!" someone shouts.

> tell them you were just looking for your car

"I was just looking for my car," you say. "But I guess I found it now."

A few people laugh and then they all leave. You follow them outside and notice that the whole neighborhood seems to be in a festive mood.

> go back, get car and drive out of the building

You return to the hospital and drive away from the building. You then realize that you forgot to take your medication so you decide to go back home and get some more. When you arrive at your house, you immediately start driving off without stopping.

> store madication for later

You continue driving until you reach your home. As soon as you park the car, you begin walking towards your front door. Suddenly, you feel like someone is following you.

> look behind you

You turn around and see a man standing right behind you with his hand on the steering wheel. He doesn't seem to be paying attention to what you're doing though; he's too busy staring at your ass.

"Hey! Hey!" you shout.

> tell him to knock it off

"Whoa, hey, calm down. It's just me," you say. "Yeah, yeah... So what brings you here anyway?" "My name's Jane and I'm looking for my car." "Ohh... Well this sucks..."

> tell him "I just found my car, though"

"Well I just found my car, though. How come you're here instead of me?" "Because I have to check up on the security system first." "Security? What the hell kind of security is this place if they don't even trust their own employees?

> ask about the security

"The security? What kind of security is this place if they don't even trust their own employees?" "It's not perfect, but it works pretty well. We've got cameras everywhere and we monitor everything 24/7." "So how many cameras are there exactly?

> ask just how much they know

"We don't really keep track of that sort of thing. But it's probably hundreds or thousands of cameras. The reason why we can afford to do such a thing is because we have a lot of money and also because we have a very good relationship with the government.

> ask why exactly they need to monitor EVERYTHING

"They want to make sure no one breaks into the hospital and steal our equipment. They also want to prevent any potential terrorist attacks." "What happens if they catch someone breaking in or something?" "Then we'll sue them for negligence and possibly even shut us down completely.

> ask about the equipment

"Ah yes, the equipment. This place has all kinds of stuff. Some of it is medical in nature and some of it isn't. For example, we have these monitors that show real time footage from every room in the hospital." "How long does this stuff last for?

> hope you aren't questioned about the fight

"Don't worry, it lasts for only a few minutes. After that, we erase the video and start over." "Wait, so how did you get this footage in the first place?

> ask what the most interesting thing recorded was

"That would be the fight between Mr. X and myself earlier today." "Wow, that sounds like an accident waiting to happen. Why didn't anyone stop him from fighting me?

> ask who Mr. X is

"Mr. X is the CEO of a company called Numb. He claims he wants to revolutionize medicine by creating a cure for cancer." "Cure for cancer? That's impossible! Cancer doesn't go away!

> ask further about Mr. X

"I'm sorry, but I don't think I understand your question. Can you explain it to me again?

> ask about the cure

"He says his invention will cure cancer. It won't, though. In fact, he claims it will kill people too." "Why would he lie about something like that?" "Because he's a greedy bastard who thinks he can get rich off of people dying of cancer.

> respond "wow, what an asshole"

"Yes, he is an asshole. Anyway, he's trying to sell this invention to the world for millions of dollars. If it works as advertised then it could save lives." "So...what are you going to do if it doesn't work?

> ask to see a picture of Mr. X

"Okay, okay, I'll take a look at the pictures later when I'm not working." "You're being very stubborn right now. Let me just grab my keys and let you out of here."

> plot to take down Mr. X

"Alright, alright, I'll wait outside."

The door opens up and you walk inside. The lights are dimmed and the air smells stale. You see a man sitting on one of the chairs with his head buried in a book.

> ask who he is

"It's a shame you can't come in, because I have some really good news." "What kind of news?

> tell him you already are inside

"Oh yes, I've been keeping an eye on you since we met yesterday. You were so nice to me and gave me all these free samples." "How did you know I was coming back here?

> ask what kind of samples

"Well, I saw you looking through my desk drawer. There were all kinds of little bottles and jars filled with different liquids. Some looked like they had strange symbols or designs on them." "And those were yours?" "Yeah, I guess so.

> realize you've seen this man before

"Wait, how did you know I was coming back here? I mean you said you didn't recognize me..." "I figured it was pretty obvious. Besides, you weren't exactly subtle about leaving the store without paying for anything." "But why would I leave without paying?

> respond " You needed something that wasn't for sale..."

"Right, sorry about that. So where are you from anyway?" "New York City." "Where else would I be from?" "Anywhere in the world.

> inspect book

"Hey, I think there might be a page missing here. What are you reading?" "A novel by Edgar Allan Poe." "That's it? That's your entire library?"

> look for missing page

"No, there isn't any missing pages. It's just that the story doesn't make sense sometimes." "Maybe it does. Maybe you should read the whole thing again." "Why don't you do that?" "Because I'm trying to learn English as fast as possible."

> tell him the story would make more sense with the page

"Okay, okay, I get it. Just put the book down and let me finish reading." "You're not going to do that?" "No, but I'd appreciate if you could help me out a bit." "Like what?

> ask what kind of help

"Do you want me to go find a job?" "No, no, no... I mean... I guess maybe. But I dunno if I'll be able to find one."

> notice missing page under chair

"What is it?" "The last page has disappeared under the chair." "Hmm, well that's odd. I can see you have a lot of books in here.

> inspect page

"It looks like someone took a pencil away from you." "Oh, I suppose so. Well at least now I know where the next page is."

> look at pencil notes on page

"Look, I don't need you to help me anymore. I'm done with this place." "Well, we still got a few things we have to discuss first. Like who will pay for all these books." "I don't care! I've had enough of this place!"

> ask him "you stole those books, didn't you?"

"Yes, I did. And when you get back, you better bring back something for me." "Fine, but I'm not bringing anything back until we talk about money." "Alright then, but I don't think it's a good idea to take my car keys either..."

> ask what he knows about the hospital

"The hospital is over on the other side of town. There's an old abandoned building there called the 'Hospital.' I think it was built around the same time as the rest of this town." "So you said before, you were born in New York City.

> ask what he knows about John

"John was my uncle. He died when I was a baby. My mom told me about his death when she found out he had cancer. She said she wanted to bury him, but she couldn't afford to do it." "That's terrible..." "Yeah, it is."

> tell him that John isn't dead and you met him earlier

"He's not dead? Then how come I met him?" "Because you were looking for him, right?" "Yeah, I was. Anyway, he said he would meet us somewhere later on." "Oh yeah, and where are we supposed to meet up again?

> realize one of the Johns must have been fake

"You're telling me that the real John is lying to me too?" "Maybe. Maybe not."

> tell him John killed your brother and you'll never forgive him

"No, no, no... That's impossible. How could he kill my brother and then be alive?" "You won't believe me if I say it wasn't him." "Then why didn't you just leave him alone?" "Because he was my uncle too."

> tell him the John you met earlier must have been an impostor

"What makes you think that?" "Because he looked exactly like my uncle." "And I thought people were always faking their faces to look different than they really are.

> tell him what the fake John did

"He took my brother's life. He killed him because he hated him so much." "But why?" "Because he was going to tell everyone that I killed my brother, which would have ruined our family name forever.

> ask what he knows about Mr. X

"Mr. X is a man who runs a cult called the 'Black Order' or some shit like that. They worship Satan and want to turn all of America into a black hole."

> "Woah... and here I thought he was just making a fake cancer cure that actually killed people?"

"Well, yes. But I don't know everything about him yet. I'm still trying to find out more information from my sister and her boyfriend." "I see... So what do you want me to do now?" "Just wait here while you go talk with them."

> "Do you know where they are now?"

"Yes, they live in a house over by the hospital. It looks like it's owned by a woman named Linda." "How do I get there?" "Go down the street and park behind this house. The front door should be open and you can just walk inside.

> "Alright, thanks. So... wanna help me take down Mr. X once and for all?"

"Sure, but first let me go talk to my sister and her boyfriend."

You head back home and make your way to the house where you had seen Linda and her boyfriend. When you arrive, you notice that it doesn't look like any of those houses on TV.

> kick down door

You knock on the door and after a few seconds, you hear a voice coming from inside.

"Who's there? Who's there?"

"It's me! It's me! My name is Matthew!" You answer as loud as you can.

> "I'm here for the Secret Cult Activities or whatever"

"Oh, okay. Well, I guess we'll talk later."

The door opens up and you enter the house. Inside the living room is a couch with a lamp on top of it. There are two men sitting at the table playing cards.

> ask them what they are playing

"We're playing Black Jack..." One says. "That's right, we are." The other replies. "Okay then, I'm gonna bet you $10 that I win." You say. "Huh? What the hell are you doing?" The man asks confused.

> "Isn't this how the game works? I've never actually played."

"No, it isn't. This is a completely different game than what you think." "What kind of game?" "A gambling game. We play a lot of games here and I've only ever heard one person win money off of us before.

> "Oh, you're that good? Well, challenge accepted."

"Challenge accepted."

The man smiles and nods his head. He takes out a small bag of money and hands it to you. You put the bag in your pocket and smile at him.

"Thanks." You reply.

> "Well, that was easy. Didn't even need to actually play..."

"Yeah, well I didn't really have anything better to do anyway." "So what did you want to play?" "Uh... Let's see... Oh yeah, Blackjack." You reply. "Blackjack?" The man says in surprise.

> "Nah, actually let's play Uno instead"

"Uno?" The man says again. "Yeah, I don't know much about this game either, so if you could teach me, that'd be great." "Uh... Sure." "Great!" You exclaim. "Let's start now!"

> shuffle deck and deal out cards

You take the deck and shuffle it a bit. Then you turn over the cards and deal out five cards face down to each player.

"Shuffle it again." You tell everyone else. "And deal out three cards face up to yourself."

> put down a blue 5 card

You put down a black 5 card. Everyone looks at you like you just lost all your money.

> "Ok, now it's your turn!"

You look around and see that there are no more players left. You sigh as you realize that you won't get to play anymore games today.

> look around room again

You look around the room once more and notice that you can hear some noise from somewhere. You quickly go back to your own room where you find out that it's not just you who hears something.

"Hey! It's me! Where are my friends?!" A voice calls out.

> walk slowly towards noise

You walk slowly towards the source of the noise. You eventually reach a door with a number on it.

"It's open!" You call out.

There's another door to your right which leads into an empty hallway while the other opens up into a bedroom.

> enter hallway

You enter the hallway and soon come across two people talking to each other. One is wearing a lab coat while the other has a baseball cap on his head.

"What are you doing here? Why aren't you at school?" The one with the lab coat asks.

> take out money bag, give them 1 money each

You hand them both $1 each. They both nod their heads in agreement and then leave the room.

> go further down hallway

You continue walking down the hallways until you finally come across a classroom. There's a girl sitting at her desk writing something on a piece of paper. She seems to be very engrossed in what she's doing and doesn't even seem to notice you or anyone else in the class.

> ask what she's writing

You stand behind the girl and ask her what she's writing.

"I'm writing a letter to my family about how I feel about them." She answers. "Well, why don't you write it out for us then?" You suggest.

> notice the letter is just random scribbles

The girl notices your presence and looks over at you.

"Oh...you're new..." She says nervously. "Yeah, I've been here since day one." You reply. "That makes me happy because I didn't know if anyone would show up today." She smiles.

> "What about the others around you?"

"They're all gone now." She replies. "Good, good, they should be too." You smile.

She continues to smile and nods before turning away from you and heading off to do whatever it is she was doing earlier.

> go back, enter bedroom

You return to the room and sit on the bed. You then look around and see nothing but darkness.

"Where could she have gone?" You wonder aloud. "Maybe she went home." Another voice responds.

> "Wait, who are you?"

"Who am I?" You ask. "Me, that's who." A third voice replies. "Okay, well where did she go?" "To her room." The first two voices answer in unison. "Alright, alright, I'll wait outside."

> go towards the sound of the voices

You walk into the dark room and find yourself staring at three figures standing in front of you. It takes a moment for you to realize who they are, but once you do, you start laughing hysterically.

"What the fuck are these things?!" You exclaim.

> take out money bag, give them 1 money each

You quickly grab some money bags and hand them to the figures.

"Here, this is for you guys." You say as you give them each $1.

"Thanks!" One of the figures says with a bow. He then turns his head slightly to address you again.

> "Now... what can you tell me about Mr. X?"

"Mr. X? Oh, he's a guy that lives right next door to me." The figure named "Door Guy" says. "Really?" You ask. "Yes, really." Door Guy confirms.

> "Alright, thanks!"

"No problem!" Door Guy beams.

You turn to the other two figures and say "So Mr. X, what can you tell me about him?"

"Um...well..." Door Guy begins hesitantly. "He's a little eccentric."

> "Sounds like a real understatement from what I've heard... anyway, I think I've heard what I need to know"

"I'm sure you have." Door Guy says.

You nod and exit the house. You soon get to work.

Here is a list of facts about kazuma kiryu

1. He was born in the year of 1984, which makes him 32 years of age.

2. He is married and has a child.

3. He is an excellent shot with a bow and arrow.

4. He is a good fighter with sword and dagger.

5. He's awesome at karaoke!
He never killed anyone, but he has attacked many in self defense.

6. He is a good cook.

7. He can play the flute really well.

8. He can also dance very well.

9. He speaks fluent English and Japanese.

10. He is a fantastic swimmer!

11. He has been to the Grand Canyon in Arizona.

12. He likes to read very much.

13. He is a big dreamer and he often sleeps in his bed when he's not around his family or girlfriend (if he has one).

14. He has lived in the US for about 10 years total, before moving to Jicol in 2017 to live with his uncle Enora, who lives there as well as his cousin Yvette, who also lives there.

15. His favorite color is green, followed by blue, then red, then black, then white, then grey, then brown and finally gold!

16. His favorite food is pizza and he always orders a pepperoni Pizza when he goes out to eat pizza at Pizza Corner in Jicol!

17. His favorite drink is milk tea and he loves the kind that comes from a cow!

18. His favorite animal is a cat and he has three rescue cats at home (which also sleep with him every night).

19. He doesn't smoke or drink alcohol, but he does eat meat if it's available!

20. He can play the drums very well, but he doesn't like to do it for long periods of time because it makes him feel tired, so he prefers to keep them short bursts of activity interspersed throughout the day when he's not sleeping!

21. His other hobby besides reading and sleeping is playing on his computer for hours on end when he's not doing anything else!

22. His favorite color combination is light blue and grey!

23. His favorite food is pancakes and orange juice!

24. His least favorite color combination is yellow and black!

25. His least favorite food is green beans and lima beans!

26. His least favorite color combination is purple and grey!

27. His least favorite food is dark green peas and yellow peas!

28. His least favorite color combination is magenta and grey!

29. His least favorite food is dark purple berries and black berries!

30. His least favorite color combination is light green and grey!

You are Engineer, a survivor trying to survive in a post apocalyptic world by scavenging among the ruins of what is left. You have a backpack and a canteen. You haven't eaten in two days so you're desperately searching for food. You enter a rundown building and look around to see if there's anyone there. You find a little girl, around the same age as your daughter, trapped in a collapsed building.

> You build dispenser. You scavenge for scraps and use your knowledge of electronics to jury-rig a crude food dispenser.

> You build teleporter. You scavenge for scraps and use your knowledge of electronics to jury-rig a crude teleporter. You attempt to use the teleporter to get back to your daughter but end up face to face with a mutant.

> You build a sentry. You scavenge for scraps and use your knowledge of electronics to jury-rig a crude sentry gun. You shoot the mutant but realize it's not going to stop it from advancing.

> You move that gear up. You scavenge for scraps and use your knowledge of electronics to jury-rig a crude generator. You power the generator with a gasoline engine, allowing you to get a clear signal on your phone.

> You shoot mutant with energy ball. You use the improvised sentry to shoot the mutant advancing on your position. You miss the mutant, which barrels through your defenses and lands a solid blow against your chest.

> You use revenge crits and shoot the mutant. You miss the advancing mutant with your sentry but shoot another mutant who emerges from the building it emerged from. You aim for its head, which explodes and kills it instantly.

> You teleport to france. You are transported back to the streets of Paris. You are transported back to the streets of Paris.

> You kill the spy sapping your teleporter. You search the spy thoroughly and find an English-Spanish phrasebook. You assume this is some sort of spy from a foreign power trying to prevent you from building a teleporter.

> You bap bang pow. Your improvised teleporter is operational. You teleport immediately to a far away place, ending up in a jungle. You transport back to your previous location.

> You say "Pony up, boys" You search the corpse of the spy and find a solid gold pocket watch. You assume this is some sort of spy from a foreign power trying to prevent you from building a teleporter. He's using a dead ringer and he's still alive! He's trying to do something and you're not going to let that happen. You aim your rifle at the teleporter and fire. The explosion causes you to lose balance and you fall to the ground.

> You say "yeeeeeeeeeeeehaw" You grab the spy's body and throw it into the teleporter.

> You say "that's what ya get" You grab your pistol and shoot the teleporter. The bullet creates a small explosion, which ends up not damaging your teleporter. You teleport and appear right next to the spy.

> You say "hey boys its a spy" You kill the spy and make sure he's dead. You continue expanding, establishing another outpost in Oregon. Soon, there are a dozen outposts, each with a few people living in it.

> You say "SENTRY BUSTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" You power up your teleporter and begin adding more power to it. Soon, it's capable of destroying entire buildings with a single blast. You send a team of 5 to Oregon to destroy the last outpost there.

> You say "buildin a sentry" You begin building a giant humanoid robot armed with a laser cannon. Once it's finished, you test it out to see if it works. It works perfectly.

> You engineer gaming. You begin designing a special kind of dice that can be used to keep track of the rounds in a game of hazard. You start using this new dice to create a game called "war game" using your cards.

> You say "engineer gaming" You begin creating a new kind of game, which you call "strategy war game", which requires a lot of thinking. You create a deck consisting of face-down cards and a series of dice.

> You make tf2 in real life. You decide to make Team Fortress 2 in real life. Once again, you have an entire team of people helping you.

> You kick the scout for missing one dollar. Once again, you have an entire team of people helping you. Once again, the scout is 0:1 vs the heavy after 5 seconds.

> You kick hacking sniper bot. Once again, you have an entire team of people helping you. Once again, hacking sniper bot gets a headshot on heavy with its arrows and gets itself upgraded to ČB-17 robot.

> You votekick. Once again, you have an entire team of people helping you. Once again, heavy wins and is 0:2 vs scout after 1 minute. This game contains no health packs or ammo drops.

> You build a dispenser behind a chokepoint. You begin creating a giant, robotic arm and attaching it to the side of your building. Once it's finished, it begins producing a never-ending stream of health packs and ammunition for the combined forces of soldiers.

> You say "that soldier's a spy" You say "BURN THAT MAN AND HIS SPYING GUN!". Soldiers fire at the pair, eventually killing them on the spot as a result of this barrage of bullets.

> You teleport bread. You teleport some of your bread to the soldiers. They easily overwhelm the already-weak spy, giving a few of them a chance to escape alive.

> You play the banjo. You begin playing the banjo, distracting the forces attacking the bridge. You successfully reach round 100 kills, and are granted five or six " resurrectims " by the medic.

> You call for medic. You say "Hey! Medic! We need a medic over here!" The medic arrives, and before you even get a chance to move, he puts a bullet in the back of your head, killing you.

> You say "oops that was not medicine" You were killed by medic.

> You say "engineer gaming" You begin creating a new kind of game, which you call "strategy war game", which requires a lot of thinking. You create a deck consisting of face-down cards and a series of dice.

> You equip the gunslinger. You grab a gunslinger and put the ctue.

> You build a mini sentry. You begin building a small, robotic sentry which you can control. You begin building a small, robotic sentry which you can control. You begin building a small, robotic sentry which you can control.

> You say "makin bacon" You say "This gun is for breakfast". You grab a sentry and start flinging it's core at people. Before you know it, you have a pile of dead body parts.

> You say "i love that little gun" You grab another sentry and start flinging it's core at people. Before you know it, you have a pile of dead body parts. You grab another sentry and start flinging it's core at people.

> You kick the sniper. Once again, you have an entire team of people helping you. Once again, hacking sniper bot gets a headshot on heavy with its arrows and gets itself upgraded to CZ-75 spy rifle.

> You switch classes. Once again, you have an entire team of people helping you. Once again, you switch to Demolitionist class. Once again, the Heavy-Weapon Soldier gets killed by the Sniper.

> You drink ale and blow people up. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on.

> You blow up the blu team. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on.

> You say "im drunk you dont have an excuse" You are killed by Medic. You drink ale and blow people apart. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on.

> You kill people with swords. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on.

> You charge at the blu team. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on.

> You sticky jump. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on.

> You switch to. the heavy. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on. > You help its stuck. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on. You enjoy a few drinks at bar, with some friendly conversation going on.

Title: Rhythm Heaven Fanfiction
Plot summary: You're a fan of the rhythm game, and you decide to write your own story about it. It gets better!

Characters: A bunch of people who play the game, or at least pretend to.

Rating: PG-13 for language, violence, and suggestive themes.

Summary: The story is set in a world where everyone plays a rhythm game called "Rhythm Heaven". In this world, there are two factions that have been fighting each other for years now: the "Gimmicks" (who play games like "Pinball Wizard" and "Shoot the Bullet") and the "Realists" (who play games like "Rockman EXE 4", which is basically Rockman EXE with a rockin' beat). One day, the Gimmick leader decides to launch an attack on the Realists. He sends his army of "Musicians" to invade their city. However, they don't know what hit them when they get there...

Author's Note: This was written while I was waiting for my computer to boot up. So yeah, this fic is going to be pretty short. Also, I'm not sure if any of this will make sense to anyone else. If you find anything that doesn't make sense, please tell me so I can fix it. Thanks!

The next morning, you wake up to a loud noise outside. You look out the window and see that the sky has turned completely dark. Then, you hear a voice calling out to you from above.

"Hey, Suzy! Wake up!"

You groggily sit up and open your eyes. Your bed is still there, but it looks different than before. There's a large black screen hanging over the side of the bed. On top of that is a TV connected to an old CRT monitor. It's currently showing a news report about some sort of alien invasion.

"What the hell happened?" you ask.

Suddenly, you feel something heavy hitting your back. You turn around and see a figure standing over you with a gun in hand.

"Whoa, slow down there blondie." he says. "I didn't think we'd actually need to do this again after all these years..."

He pulls the trigger, causing you to fall backwards onto the floor. As soon as your vision clears, you realize that you're no longer strapped into a chair. Instead, you're lying face first on the ground with a gun pointed directly at your head.

"Now then, I guess you've come to kill me too." he says. "But I'm afraid you won't be able to do that."

As he walks towards you, he points the gun at your head.

"Because I'm not done killing you yet."

At this point, you're not really sure what to expect. The thing is though, you've never seen him like this before either. His clothes are dirty, his hair is disheveled and he even smells like rotten garbage.

"So why did you bring me here anyway? Why did you drag me through time and space to do this?" you say.

"Well, let's just say I had to put myself in the shoes of someone who wants to kill you." he replies.

He takes another step closer to you and begins to speak faster.

"This isn't about revenge or justice. This is about survival...and I believe that you have the potential to become the one to save us all."

He pauses briefly and turns away from you.

"And if you don't want to listen, well that's fine too. But remember, I am here for you."

With those last words said, he fires the gun at your head.

"See ya later, Suzy."

With that final shot, the world goes black.

The End

Title: Yakuza Fanfiction
Plot summary: A young man is in a bar, drinking and talking to his girlfriend. Suddenly he notices two men coming up behind him with guns drawn. He screams and ducks down but the bullets hit him anyway. The next day he wakes up in an abandoned house, covered in blood and looking at himself in a mirror. He realizes that he's been shot through the chest and his heart has stopped. He then remembers that he had a gun in his hand when the two men came up from behind him.

"I'm sorry," he says to himself as he looks at his own reflection. "I was just so drunk I didn't even think about what would happen if I pulled this trigger."

He gets dressed and leaves the house, heading towards his car. As he drives along he sees a sign for a gas station and stops at it. He fills up his tank and heads back home where he finds out that his girlfriend has left him.

Author's Note: This story takes place in the same universe as my other fic, 'The Darkest Hour'. It will be very similar in tone and theme, though it won't take place during the same time period.

As always thanks for reading!

You are Hurricane Jammy, a patient living in Chicago. You have a hospital bracelet and a pack of bandages. You wake up in an old rundown hospital with no memory of how you got there. You take a look around the room and see other patients. You: "Hello, I am hurricane jammy!" You say in a childish voice. Patient 1: A girl who has cut herself and is heavily bandaged sits up.

> You ask the girl what her name is. The girl looks at you and smiles. "I'm Ashley." She says.

> You say "Nice to meet you, Ashley!" "How far is it to Philadelphia please?" "About 5 hours." You say. Ashley's eyes widen.

> You say "Is something wrong?" Ashley bites her lip nervously. "I don't want to seem ungrateful or anything but how much is that for a ride?" She asks. You pause for a moment.

> You say "If I had to guess, it would probably cost about 200 dollars." "Oh." Ashley says.

> You say "Why do you ask?" Ashley bites her lip and looks away. "I'm running out of money and if I don't get to Philadelphia soon, my mom is going to come get me and it'll be all my fault."

> You say "Why are you running away from your mother?" Ashley bites her lip. "The last time I ran away from her, she took my phone away and I couldn't text anyone to help me." She says. You pause for a moment.

> You say "Do you have your phone now?" Ashley pauses and thinks for a moment. "I did, but the person who gave it to me took it back."

> You say "That's a shame..." Ashley looks at you with an eyebrow raised. "Why is that a shame?" She asks. You pause for a moment.

> You say "Maybe you could've used it to find someone who would give you a ride to Philadelphia for free!" "Hmm, I don't think so." She says. You sigh heavily. "Come on, let me buy you a meal."

> You say "But aren't you running out of money?" "I'll manage." She says politely. You shake your head.

> You follow Ashley to the lunch room. You follow Ashley to the lunch room, which is empty. There's a bunch of people in the lunch room you passed earlier, laughing and talking. You sit down at a table along with Ashley.

> You say "Can I tell you something?" "Sure." You take a deep breath before speaking. "I'm a... Well, I was a member of a gang." You say. "Really?" Ashley asks.

> You say "At least, I think I was. I lost my memory, but I found some paperwork saying I was in a gang." "Wait, how did you lose your memory?" "I was in a terrible car crash." "Oh, I'm so sorry." You shrug.

> You say "It's fine." "No, it's not fine!" Ashley says. "I appreciate the concern, but it's fine." "No, it's not." "Well I don't want to hear anymore about it."

> You say "Anyways, I'm trying to figure out who I am and why I'm here." "Why were you in a gang?" "We were gang members." "Oh." You finish your food and Ashley pays the bill.

> You try to find a private place to talk with Ashley. You excuse yourself and go to the bathroom. When you return, Ashley is gone. A wave of loneliness hits you and you sigh heavily. You spot a door that says "storage room."

> You enter the storage room. The storage room has a lot of boxes. Some of the boxes have names on them and others don't. You walk over to one that says "Ashley's box."

> You open Ashley's box. There's a bunch of pictures in Ashley's box. Most of them are selfies, but there are a few of her with other people.

> You close Ashley's box and look for your box. There's no box to be found. You shrug and continue to look around. Eventually, you find a box with "Hurricane's box" written on it. You open it. Inside are various things. There's a video game system, a bag of clothes, and a turtle. You're not sure what the turtle is for.

> You investigate the turtle. You slowly pick up the turtle. It is a small turtle, but it feels surprisingly heavy in your hands. You turn it around to look at it from all sides. There's something engraved on its shell.

> You read the engraving. "To my friend, Hurricane. Thanks for being my friend, even when I was stupid." You cringe. That's your name, engraved on a turtle's shell, no less. How fitting.

> You try to look for a sign of who engraved that onto the turtle's shell. There's really nothing to look at. The turtle is just sitting there in your hands. You put it down. At this moment, a voice behind you speaks up. "Hey, I'm looking for someone." You turn around to see a tall woman, one of the other people in the photos in Ashley's box. It's her mother. "Oh, uh... yeah, me." You say, flustered. "I'm looking for a girl named Ashley. She was my daughter."

> You say "I heard she fled to Philadelphia" "Yeah, she did. She lives in a house in the suburbs." "Oh, well can you drop me off at her house? I need to talk to her.

> You say "What do you need to talk to her for?" The woman thinks for a moment, scratching her head. "Well... ever since my husband died, Ashley's been a good listener." She says. "I really need someone to talk to.

> You say "I don't know where her house is, sorry." "Oh." The woman says, sighing.

> You say "Is something wrong?" "I don't know. I was so sure that we'd... well, forget all this that I'm having a hard time dealing with it. Ashley's always been the strong one."

> You say "Forget all what?" She sighs again and says in a low voice. "Ashley killed my husband." You stare at her. She doesn't look at you, just turns around and leaves you in the storage room.

> You say "Wait, come back." You call out to her, but she doesn't turn around. You're alone in the abandoned hospital... Except you're not. A ghost of a woman floats past your vision.

> You say "Who are you?" "I'm Linda Niles," the ghost says. "I killed your friend. Not Ashley, me."

> You say "What do you mean? I only just met Ashley today." "I was her friend too. I committed suicide the day before she was supposed to testify against me." "You... killed yourself? "Yes." Linda sighs heavily. "I got a bad feeling about this case the moment I read that suicide note. Something doesn't feel right." Carefully, you step towards Linda. "What do you mean by that?" "That's what the cops said when they found me."

> You pause and think for a moment. "What do you mean?" "I shot myself in the head." She laughs a little bit.

> You say "What's so funny?" "I remember what the detective said when they found me. He asked me if I wanted to say anything before I died. I said no, and he didn't believe me." "What did he say? "He grabbed me by the shoulders and told me to say something, anything. I died in his arms." You can't tell if she's being serious or making a joke. In any case, you have no idea what she's talking about. "What are you exactly?

> You say "I'm an amnesiac gang member in an abandoned hospital trying to find out who I really am." "No, you're not." "Yes, I am." "You're not. I'm serious. This is all happening. You killed me, remember?"

> You say "You said you killed yourself." "Yes, I did." "And?" "And that's it. I'm dead."

> You say "Then why did you say I killed you?" "You suggested in the note that I kill myself, and I did." "Oh. So do you have any questions for me?" "What's your name?" "Linda Niles." "..."

> You say "That name sounds familiar, now that I'm thinking about it." "What do you remember?" "Not much... I'm looking for someone... Linda Niles." "..." "Ha, got it! Thank you!" "You're welcome.

Kedar is a world of dragons, demons, and monsters. These dark creatures constantly war for control of the land, leaving the few human kingdoms in the shadow of a dark and powerful force. But now, the kingdoms of man are fighting back, slowly assembling an army to reclaim their world.

You are Dottie Mc Gee, a female half-demon sorceress in Cadast, a city in the Kingdom of Kense. You've recently come to Cadast to find your fortune and to find other sorcerers. You don't yet know what you will do when you find them, but whatever it is, you intend to do it well. You are a member of the Royal Guard, which is the army of Kense.

> You quit your job. You have quit your job at the Drunk Tortoise. Your next job is working as a mercenary for the Galpat Kingdom. This is a difficult choice for you.

> You poison the mercenary leader. You approach the travelling merchant Cara and poison a drink she offers you. You hope she falls unconcious. Unfortunately, her guards catch you before you can escape. They take you into custody.

> You blow up the guards with a fireball. You raise a small fireball in your hand and with a quick throw it incinerates the two guards. You then cloak yourself and make for the door of the jail cell you've been put in.

> You squeeze through the bars. You manage to squeeze through the small bars of your cell, but the guards have sealed it off. You can hear someone calling for the chief...

> You teleport out of the building. You teleport out of the window of your cell, falling into a pile of garbage in the alleyway. You struggle to get up, but hide amongst the garbage until the guards pass.

> You use your influence with the royal guard to start a coup. You persuade the captain of the Royal guard to join you in a coup against the Kedar royals. He's convinced.

> You overthrow the royals with the captain of the royal guard, and become queen of Kedar. You manage to convince the captain of the guard to join you, and together you organize a coup against King Casimir. You take power, and Casimir and his family are taken into protective custody.

> You execute King Casimir as a traitor. You execute King Casimir, and become ruler of the Kingdom of Kedar. After a few months you find your place on the throne, and begin to make plans for the future.

> You start issuing propaganda saying that you are the best kingdom and you are the greatest queen. You start to issue propaganda saying that you are the greatest queen. This works in your favor, and the population loves you and your reign. You also start your own crusade of exploring new locations.

> You send the army to invade Agadori, taking it over. The army of Kedar invades the small kingdom of Agadori, which has proven to be a pain in the butt to deal with.

> You sponsor a civil war in Agadori, weakening them. You start a war with the Kingdom of Agadori, and waste no time in taking their capital. The war is not going well for you.

> You cause a coup in Agadori. You attempt to cause a coup in the Kingdom of Agadori, but it fails. You immediately start looking for another way to get what you want.

> You throw a meteor at Agadori. You immediately order the launching of a meteor at the capital of Agadori. The royal palace in Kedesh is severely damaged, but the city as a whole is saved.

> You cast a spell to destroy all fortifications in Agadori. You launch a spell from the palace, which breaks down all fortifications in the small nation of Agadori. You manage to send a regiment there to deal with the situation, but it appears hopeless.

> You start a propaganda campaign to grow the size of the army. You start a propaganda campaign to convince people to join the army. This works, and the ranks are filled as you expected. With your plans set into motion, you make your plans to invade the Kingdom of Kesh.

> You invade Agadori. You decide to invade the kingdom of Agadori, you don't expect much opposition since Casimir just abandoned the place.

> You issue propaganda in the kingdom of Agadori, convincing the people to support your reign as queen of their land. You send propaganda to the citizens of Agadori claiming you are their beloved queen. The people love it and within a few days, riots break out in the capital city of Kedesh.

> You issue propaganda to improve public opinion of necromancy. You begin a propaganda campaign to improve public opinion of necromancy. The result is excellent and the Dornans are still hated by most.

> You raise an army of the dead and have them join the army of Kense. You immediately raise an army of the dead and have them march on Kesh. The undead horde makes it within a few days, you however are met by an army of men at the borders.

> You use the enormous army of the dead to destroy Kesh. You decide to use the army of undead to destroy the Kingdom of Kesh. You send many skeletal warriors and an undead dragon against your enemies, covering them in bones and rotting flesh.

> You request the surrender of Kesh. You attempt to parley with the Keshian soldiers, but they ignore you and maintain their defense. The undead dragon unleashes a gout of flame at the company of horsemen, roasting them all.

> You send the armies of Kense to attack Kesh. You order an attack on the Kingdom of Kesh by the armies of Kense. The undead horde storms forward as the cannon fodder is killed in large quantities, while you personally lead the way...

> You break the fortifications of Kesh with a spell. You unleash a volley of ice spikes at the walls of Kesh, shattering them and causing the undead horde to pour in.

> You depose the leaders of Kesh and install a puppet government. You control the puppet government and have complete control over the nation of Kesh. You use this golden opportunity to strengthen your power base and purge your enemies from the inside.

> You issue propaganda in the nation of Kesh that says that you are a fair and just queen. You start spreading propaganda saying that you are a just and fair ruler. Your people enjoy it, and the nation turns to you for guidance in running the nation.

> You rebuild destroyed fortifications. You begin rebuilding the fortifications of Kesh destroyed during the assault.

> You become a lich. You find out that your heart is incapable of pumping blood and your body is incapable of sustaining life. You end your life as a mortal so you can live a long one as a powerful lich.

> You use powerful magic to rebuild all fortifications in the kingdom of Agadori. You discover powerful magic that allows you to rebuild the ruined fortifications of the Kingdom of Agadori to their former glory.

> You request the surrender of the kingdom of Kedarn. You send a messenger to Kedarn saying that the Kingdom of Agadori will be willing to surrender if their is no chance of repulsing the undead hordes.

> You invade Kedarn. You order an invasion of the Kingdom of Kedarn and move your army of undead warriors to strike at the heart of the Kingdom.

> You destroy the walls of the capital of Kedarn. You unleash a furious volley of arrows on the walls of the Kingdom of Kedarn. The arrows breach the walls, killing many soldiers in the process and allowing your warriors to pour in and overwhelm the remaining soldiers.

> You depose the Emperor of Kedarn, and replace him with a puppet government. You take control of the Kingdom of Kedarn, and gain an ally in the Empire. You begin rebuilding the Kingdom of Kedarn with the aim of creating a new empire and dominating the continent of Kedar.

> You look over your conquests. You look over the lands you took control over and feel pleased with your work. However, even with your power, you cannot afford to rest.

> You solidify your control of the world. Year 75 You look over the centers of your many cities.

> You declare yourself Dark Lord Dottie the first, high queen of the world. You decide to make yourself the first of a new line of immortal rulers. You decree that hence forth all rulers shall be known as "Darth", "Lord" or "Majesty".

> You institute single-payer healthcare. Year 1 You pass a law that all citizens of the Kingdom of Kesh are granted free access to the best medical treatment available, regardless of wealth or social standing.

> You instill patriotism among the people. Year 75 You decide to instill patriotism among the people of the Kingdom. This involves creating a system of schools teaching the history of your kingdom, to instill pride in your people.

> You fight corruption in the government. Year 100 You pass a law that any member of the government who is found guilty of corruption, shall receive a sentence of death.

> You outlaw racism. Year 100 You pass a law that makes it illegal to be a racist. This is mainly aimed at the Eternals, who many believe are racist towards the Felkans.

> You outlaw sexism. Year 100 You pass a law that makes it illegal to be a sexist. This is mainly aimed at the Eternals, who many believe are sexist towards the Felkan women.

> You invent firearms. Year 150 Having managed to invent firearms, the Agadori citizens are able to overcome the Felkans in open combat for the first time in history.

> You supply the armies with firearms. Year 180 You ban all privately owned firearms in the Kingdom of Kesh. You also push for the creation of a professional military, to secure the country from internal and external threats.

> You fund the sciences. Year 200 Citizen invent the steam engine, allowing for the first time ever, an increase in manufacturing. This leads to several advances in the fields of mining, construction and manufacturing. You also continue funding the sciences.

> You start the industrial revolution. Year 210 With the invention of the industrial revolution, you create factories to create weapons and other goods. You also begin creating mines and farming for food, as before this, your people relied on trade for their food.

> You invent electricity. Year 225 The first powerplant begins operating. The citizens of Kesh are amazed by the invention of free energy.

> You invent computers. Year 240 With the invention of the computer, your kingdom begins creating an army of super-soldiers. These super-soldiers are to be given cybernetic implants to increase their combat efficiency.

> You invent advanced medicine. Year 250 Your scientists discover that the creation of the powerplant has led to an increase in the occurrence of lung disease. You begin banning the burning of coal to reduce the number of victims of this disease.

> You use green energy. Year 280 With the invention of green energy, your kingdom begins building powerplants using wood and other forms of fuel, such as grass and coal.

> You invent the internet. Year 300 A group of inventors independently invent the internet, allowing for instant communication over vast distances.

> You start training a replacement. Year 315 After a long search for a new Eternal, you find one in the town of Telis. This young girl, barely in her teens, displays an amazing aptitude for magic.

> You train the young girl in the ways of leadership. Year 320 The girl, now a woman, has proven to be an excellent leader. She immediately begins expanding the kingdom's influence by conquering the small towns on the borders of your kingdom.

> You help her become a lich. Year 330 You teach the woman to become a lich. This allows her to unleash her full potential in combat, rather than being limited by her youth as you were. She becomes a terrifying warrior.

> You ask the new lich her name. Year 335 The new lich reveals her name to be Edolith Telis.

> You rule jointly with Edolith Telis. Year 340 With your joint rule with Edolith, the Kingdom of Kedarn is transformed into a powerful empire. You begin to make plans to conquer all of lands ruled by man, but your wife has other ideas.

> You ask your wife for her ideas. Year 347

> You ask Edolith her ideas. Year 351 The Kedarn Empire begins a massive expansion campaign, quickly conquering most of the territory surrounding the Kingdom of Kedarna. The mercenary teams hired by the kingdom are defeated one by one.

> You conquer the rest of the world. Year 365 The last remnants of civilization are crushed. The Empire rules over a world where any that oppose it will surely die. The Empire's tyranny will never end, but the sun will eventually set.

> You rule fairly and justly. Year 368 You spend the rest of your years working to maintain a balance of justice and tyranny. The people seem to like you and your just rule helps solidify your place as an Empire hero.

> You officially declare Edolith your successor. Year 368 You say that after your death, Edolith will be the ruler of the Empire. She accepts, but there are some in the military that do not agree. There is a brief, bloody war.

> You issue propaganda saying Edolith will be a good successor. Year 373 The peasants, having been oppressed for so long by the Empire, like being under the benevolent rule of a just ruler. This leads to them resisting the mercenary efforts of the Kedarn kingdom.

> You peacefully retire to pursue research efforts. Year 378 The end is near. You are in your study with your wife, as you have been for the past several years.

> You discover immortality. Year 378 You find and decipher the writings of the first Lich Lord, a necromancer who lived nearly five centuries ago. Through his writings, you learn how to create a being of pure energy: the ghost.

> You become immortal. Year 379 While you age normally, your immortality has granted you greatly extended lifetimes for other things. For instance, you discover that you can now live for an extendable amount of time without sleep.

> You cure aging. Year 380 The process begins to destroy you. It becomes certain that the mortal shell you now occupy will be destroyed.

> You invent space flight. Year 384 The final process of your destruction begins. The energy you've been expending to maintain your existence is starting to tear you apart.

> You request the kingdom conquer the universe for you. Year 401 Shocked by your question, you begin to laugh. The soldiers laughing with you are soon silenced. The process of your death is nearly complete. The Kedarn Empire has accepted your final request.

> You give the kingdom spacecraft to conquer the universe with. Year 403 You give a portion of your spacecraft and all of your resources to the king of Kedarn.

> You watch as Kedarn conquers the universe. Year 404 You watch as the Kedarn Empire expands throughout the galaxy. The massive machine that was once your brain has shut down, but you continue to turn vital systems of your body to keep it working.

> You upload your brain into a computer. Year 404 Your mind and essence are now contained within a computer. You watch as the Kedarn Empire continues to expand throughout the galaxy. In another decade, you see them finally discover Earth.

> You open peaceful contact with the earth. Year 406 Your consciousness enters the frozen brain of an ancient Neanderthal, frozen in a state of aggression.

> You allow earth to join the Kedarn empire. Year 407 The Earth Union is finally discovered. The Kedarn Empire immediately sends representatives to speak with the new earth nation.

> You teach earth the secrets of magic. Year 409 You begin teaching psychic powers, magic, and the secrets of the mind to the earth leaders. Research continually proves aliens visited the planet at some point in the past.

> You become ruler of all the galaxy. Year 413 The Kedarn Empire has destroyed the Earth Confederacy. The Confederacy is a non-aligned planet, and an ally to earth.

> You invent intergalactic travel. Year 415 You have revolutionized intergalactic travel. The first ships capable of faster-than-light speeds leave the Kedarn Empire.

> You conquer all the galaxies. Year 467 You own the galaxy. The only thing that remains is to fill it with a new order, under your rule. The chambers of your vast and magnificent mind are at last at rest.

> You have your wife upload her brain into a computer too. Year 467

> You rule forever, justly and fairly. Year 467 The last living mortal enters the chamber. "Come to join me?" She nods. "Of course."

> You ask the last living mortal her name. She says, "My name is Dasha." You nod. She looks around nervously. "The golden sword... it's in the Earth Kingdom." You laugh.

> You tell her the golden sword doesn't matter anymore, because the universe is ours now. Year 467 The ancient being stirs from its slumber. You raise your hands and begin a powerful chant. The ground begins to quake and crack, and hundreds of eyes open around you.

> You destroy the ancient being with the most powerful magic and technology available. Year 536 The being stands, a massive abomination. It's skin seems to be made of solidified blood, with veins visible through its withered and dried out surface.

> You kill the being. You unleash a powerful beam of light from the palm of your hand, which disintegrates the creature. You gaze at your hand in awe, as a massive headache overpowers you.

> You take some aspirin. Year 537 You have a strong feeling you should be doing something about all this, but between running the Empire and fighting off a potential new threat, you're a little pre-occupied to do so right now.

> You discover a way to become an Elder God. Year 537 It takes years of intense and complex experiments, which drain you of what little energy you have left, but you succeed. You are now immortal and ageless, with perfect health.

> You rule for eternity as Dark Lord and Elder God Dottie Mcgee the great. Congratulations! You have reached the end of the good path.

In a world where characters from everywhere like manga, video games, cartoons, etc. come to live their lives peacefully. You live with three of your favorite characters! Your name is Jerry Seinfeld. You are a 32 year old male living with Skeletor from Masters of the Universe, Truman from The Truman Show, and last but not least Squidward from Spongebob Squarepants.

In a world where characters from everywhere like manga, video games, cartoons, etc. come to live their lives peacefully. You live with three of your favorite characters! Your name is Jerry Seinfeld. You are a 32 year old male living with Skeletor from Masters of the Universe, Truman from The Truman Show, and last but not least Squidward from Spongebob Squarepants.

Transitioning to when the characters got all cozied in their new home, which is a(n) apartment in the city. It is a faithful day in the middle of Summer and you are on the couch Writing comedy jokes. All is good, until you feel a light tap on your shoulder. You look over and see one of the characters. Skeletor looks as sinister as always in his black armor. He carries two swords that have the power to destroy the universe. He speaks with a voice that could burn the sky,

> You say "What do you want now, Skeletor?" Skeletor is taken back by your cold nature, You continue to stare at the villain, he's about to run away. Then you stand up and walk over to him. What comes next is an epic battle between good and evil! Skeletor: Give up? Ha ha ha ha ha! This is the best day ever! Truman suddenly comes in, returning from work. He notices you embracing death, Truman: Hey! What's going on here? Skeletor: Quick! Hit him with your sword!

> You slice Truman in half. Truman feels the pain as Skeletor's Broadsword cleaves him in half! Truman: Aaaaaiieee! Skeletor: What were you thinking, Jerry?

> You say "I wasn't thinking." Skeletor raises his Broadsword to strike, but you slash at him. He blocks the attack and pushes you away. Skeletor runs around you and heads to the other side of the room.

> You say "Sorry, Truman." Skeletor raises his sword and swings, but you dodge. In that moment, Skeletor is wide open for another attack. You quickly go for his ankle, but he dodges again.

> You give up any sort of strategy and kick him in the crotch. Skeletor falls on his face and begins to feel the pain. As he turns over, you jump on him. His sword misses its mark by a few feet when you land your foot in his throat.

> You stab him in the throat. You stab him over and over again in the throat, and he attempts to escape death. Meanwhile, the rest of your friends come running when they hear the fighting.

> You say "It's not what it looks like. Skeletor started it!" Your friends don't believe you, Skeletor: What? I was the victim here! Squidward: Well you almost killed him anyway! Skeletor: Fools! This is the end! The world will soon be mine! Monica: Maybe, but not today. She shoots him in the chest with an arrow. Skeletor: Agh!

> You say "Monica!? Where did you come from?" She turns to the group victorious. Monica: I hid near the edge of the woods and saw everything. Skeletor: Aww! Why'd you have to go and do that?! Monica Lewinsky sings her battle cry as Skeletor bleeds out. You clap for her. Truman looks horrified. Squidward is indifferent. She approaches you and looks at you for a second. Monica: I don't know you, but you were cool just then. Right then. “Thanks,” you reply. Suddenly, Vincent Vega comes in with a gun! Vincent: This is a hostage situation! Everyone, you're all free to come out now! If you don't, I'll kill one of your friends! With that threat, everyone reaches an agreement and exits the building.

> You say "That was stupid." Vincent is taken aback by your criticism. Vincent: Yeah, I guess it was. He turns to head out as well. Everyone leaves the now wrecked apartment. Skeletor's dead. Truman's alive, and probably in trouble with his friends now. Monica has proven herself to be a hero today. It's just you and Squidward now.

> You say "Hey Squidward, wanna go on a date?" Squidward: Hmm...well... You pull out a small pad and pen. You: Just write down the date and time you'd prefer to go on a date. Squidward: ... He writes down the time he'd prefer to go on a date. You: Great. Where do you wanna go? Squidward: How about the Polar Bear Cafe?

> You say "Sounds great!" You and Squidward hold hands as you head towards the exit. You arrive at the bus stop, and wait for the bus. The bus comes, and you get on. You arrive at the Polar Bear Cafe. It's exactly as you remembered. A coffee shop/bar filled with hippies. You and Squidward walk inside, and take a seat in the corner. A pretty girl walks over to your table. Pretty girl: Hey, are you two together? You: Huh? Oh. No, no. He's my uncle. I'm just showing him around. I'm going to college in the city.

> You say "We'd like the soupy salad and fish sticks." Pretty girl: O.K. I'll be right back. You sit there uncomfortable until the pretty girl returns with your food. You thank her and begin eating. You forget to realize that you got Squidward fish sticks. He's horrified that you got him such a thing. He can barely choke them down. You: I can't eat these, they're too stale. Pretty girl: Here you go then. You unwillingly accept the second package of fish sticks and begin eating.

> You look out the window to see something odd. You notice that the hippies in the coffee shop are oddly...geometric. It's like their form is all weird angles and they're missing edges.

> You realize there video game characters! Like in those old school Nintendo games! Except real! You: They're just like the pixelated characters in old 8-bit games! They're just 3D models! Squidward: Right! This is so cool! I used to love those old games when I was little! I had the Game & Watch games too, remember?

> You say "Squidward, now is not the time to reminisce! Can't you see the implications?"