Be sure to ride the FrictionCoaster, the only roller coaster in the world deliberately designed to create as much friction as possible!
He may be a giant, nightmarish brute, but like all villains in this series,he sure can sing.
Semain Calm
And check out Lowtide: the only log flume ride in the world without water OR a drop. You just sit on a log until we tell you to go away!
and the public won't dwell on my transmission cause it wasn't televised.
One of our most famous attractions is the Slow Coaster, the slowest rollercoaster on Earth! It moves so slowly that someone could watch 2001: A Space Odyssey from start to finish and the ride still wouldn't be over! It's sure to prolong your enoyment!
—signature not found—
I'm back, I guess.
Check out the most dangerous rollercoaster in the world named Slaughter-Coaster, even in the start, you'll fall and die!
I can't think of a good signature.
Back by Unpopular Demand
Check out Minecraft: The Ride! The illegal simulator we didn’t even ask the copyright for that simulates Minecraft the best it can. From actually being blown up by “Creepers” (TNT), to actually hitting your head on Minecart rides, to at the end, going outside, and then “Turning the mode to creative” (Which is basically dropping everyone from a far height).
And here's one of our tallest attractions, Hellevator! The ride has no seats, no restraints, you just stand! The Hellevator climbs past the clouds and to the Exosphere, then drops and sends you into freefall! You'll be hovering for a bit, weightless, and when you reach the bottom, your elevator car will slow down so sharply that you'll crash into the ceiling!
Please note that lines get pretty long, as we have to clean people’s remains out of the cars in-between rides. And that’s WITH multiple towers. Now with added VR!
Edited by Routeferret on Jun 13th 2020 at 12:36:33 PM
i think i’m in love (probably just hungry)
uwu'd too hard
Be sure to check out the Extreme Teapots ride! It's just a normal teapots ride, but everything goes super fast! We didn't even add seatbelts, that's how unmodified it is! You can also walk on it! You can also check out The Blender, made by RT Game himself!
Edited by R3Ked on Jun 13th 2020 at 2:39:30 AM
Professional Professionalist
Don’t miss the chance to have a photo op with our cuddly costumed characters. May or may not be convicted murderers under the head, we don’t know!
"Don't cry because it's over, cry because it happened."
The Ice Queen
And don't forget to check out our educational activities, including our world-famous Lint Museum! No long lines to worry about here, and no pesky air-conditioning either!
eh
don't forget to check THE VOID which is a exhibition full of [REDACTED] and [DATA EXPUNGED] and [CENSORED]. any damage to your sanity is your responsibility.
I’m a space pirate, give me your moon rocks.
Worried about nasty bathrooms? Not to worry! We distinguish ourselves from the rest by implementing a strict quality control policy via exorbitant entrance fee for all of our bathrooms, ensuring only the most refined and desperate individuals are able to enter and severely decreasing the chances of a disgusting restroom!
May want to stay away from the trees, though.
Forum signature.
An eagle
Check out the Krusty Chum Restaurant! The design is totally not stolen and combined from certain two restaurants from a certain cartoon. Come enjoy our fishy, chummy burgers! We are pretty sure you'll love it!
Just an eagle. (Feel free to PM me if you want to talk to me).
We have a pizzeria for for whole family in the park! And the animatronics there are totally not designed by killers or haunted in any way! And we totally didn't ask that infamous pizzeria place to help with this!
The League of Heroes
This is our new for 2020 addition - Pirate's
El Apocanindesperoomerdurixexpresserasermanegehawk Tren De La Mina! The world's first Vekoma Hyper Inverted Looping Stand-Up Mine Train coaster! Featuring a 200ft spiral lift hill and 35 painful inversions - and it goes backwards, which means you get to go through all 35 inversions a second time! Will it kill you? No, of course not! Will you wish it killed you? Yes, definitely!
Is that not enough? Why don't you try the ride's sister coaster - Pirate's El Apocanindesperoomerdurixexpresserasermanegehawk Tren De La Mina II, an exact clone of the original Pirate's El Apocanindesperoomerdurixexpresserasermanegehawk Tren De La Mina with added VR and machines built into the restraints that count how many times your head slams against them!
Edited by Routeferret on Jun 21st 2020 at 7:11:14 PM
i think i’m in love (probably just hungry)
I’m a space pirate, give me your moon rocks.
And for roller coaster connoisseurs, we've taken the liberty to import one of the most well known coasters from Six Flags Magic Mountain! That's right, Green Lantern: First Flight will be on our grounds very soon, and with no new adjustments whatsoever, so you can have the same experience as the people who rode the original! It'll squeeze a lifetime of action into 90 seconds!
Edited by VidExGuy on Jun 15th 2020 at 11:16:45 AM
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Oh Captain!~
Tired of boring old teacup rides? Then the Spinning Puke Buckets are just for you! After being whipped around like a rag doll at high speeds, you'll really need the ride's cars afterwards!
Hey how you doing well I'm doing just fine I lied I'm dying inside
I’m a space pirate, give me your moon rocks.
We should make a work page about this.
Forum signature.Be sure to visit the Hall of Windows. That's right, they're not mirrors, they're windows. We took a DNA sample from you when you walked in, and we use it to create clones of you when you enter the HOW so it'll look just like a bunch of mirrors!
He may be a giant, nightmarish brute, but like all villains in this series,he sure can sing.
Our security guards are equipped with tazers to ensure that the things that have been getting in and out of our amusement parks never do so.
We are not implying that there are things trying to get into or out of our amusement park, by the way. Our amusement park is free of any malicious forces. However, if you have the name of [REDACTED], please come back to the night shift. You are the only one who can do this job.
Also, we have a new candy-making animatronic! We don't know how it makes candy though.
Edited by KingOfStickers on Jun 16th 2020 at 3:19:32 PM
Survival Horror Expert
Come and try our shooting gallery only instead of boring airguns we went and installed actual guns and ammunition for our customers to shoot.
Edited by RichardBranagh on Jun 16th 2020 at 1:09:42 PM
"We do these things not because they are easy but because they are hard".
Here's a classic attraction; the Ferris Wheel! No, it's not an actual ferris wheel, but rather a large museum based around the history of ferris wheels!
Directly next to it is another museum, based around the history of published written text, with the simple name of RELATION ALLER FURNEMMEN UND GEDENCKWURGIGEN HISTORIEN.
i think i’m in love (probably just hungry)
Back by Unpopular Demand
If you were wanting some nostalgia, then you won’t be sad that we took one of Disney’s most famous attractions, Superstar Limo! But not to worry, we made some of the more hated parts of the ride better!
Take for instance, many people hating the speed of the ride, so we made it slower! Now the ride barely moves! The ride time is now 50 minutes long!
A lot of people that the ride is too boring! So we added drops and loops! Combine this with the ride length, and you have at least 5 minutes of being upside down at a time! Is that fun or what?
And many people said that the Hollywood references and celebrity cameos were dated, so we made them more modern! Now, instead of going around Hollywood, you will go around five randomly generated places in TV Tropes, for reride ability, These change every 200 years! Here is our current list.
As for the celebrities, we changed them too! Here is our list of celebrities:
- Lil Tay
- Donald Trump
- Jo Jo Siwa
- Hitler
- Kim Jong Un
- Britney Spears
Have fun on this all new take on an old classic!
Edited by DookieIdiotNimrod on Jun 16th 2020 at 1:33:18 AM
Also for this season, we have four other new attractions!
- Rollercoaster: The Ride! A 4D simulator with POV footage of all the park's coasters!
- Fast and Furious: Supercharged! A relocation of the Universal attraction, staying exactly the same!
- Angry Birds: The Ride! A giant catapult where guests are launched into real wood and glass buildings!
- Manta - A clone of the coaster at Seaworld Orlando! Except it's not, it's just a Zamperla Volare!
Edited by Routeferret on Jun 21st 2020 at 7:13:04 PM
i think i’m in love (probably just hungry)
Have you read Jurassic Park a hundred times? Have you been just waiting for a real-life one?
We have you, and we see you!
Come to our newest area, Jurassic Insect Park! Insects from the Jurassic! And to make sure they're just as unpredictable and possibly deadly as the inspiration, we've engineered the ants with extra deadly venom and aggressive swarming instincts, and the hornets have been crossed with murder hornets!
Edited by PointMaid on Jun 16th 2020 at 8:22:17 AM
As the title suggests, come up with really bad ideas for rides/attractions/etc. Starting with a name:
Welcome to Crappy Land, the Depressingest Place in Earth!
You have just enough energy to climb this hill, but not enough energy to go on or look for someplace else to camp.