Your First Funeral Visit

When you first visit a Funeral, what was it like?

I ask this because... I have never went to one.

I went to my grandmother on my dad's side's funeral when I was around 5 years old. I don't remember anything about it.

I've been to 4 funerals within the last 10 years. They're depressing, but also a good time to reflect on the life of the deceased person.

Quite a few. I didn't even know most of those people though. Just my great-grandfather and my grandfather.

But I kinda... made my own funeral 3 years after my mom died, because I didn't get to visit hers when she died.

My first was actually for an officer from my regiment. It was sad.

Well, it wasn't the actual funeral, as his body had been sent home, but we held a memorial service on the day of his funeral.

They read out a letter from his daughter and we sang I Vow to Thee, My Country and I choked.

Been to a few since then, including 75% of my grandparents, and carried a few coffins. Now I just feel stiff and numb all the way through the service, then I go and get rat-arsed at the party after.

Well, what about attending a funeral of someone you never really care for that much?

The Truth is... my nephew was shot Saturday and his Funeral is Tomorrow. The thing is... I always did find him annoying, and he messed with my stuff alot. I question if I deserved to attend his funeral.

edited 13th Jul '12 1:47:14 PM by asiacatdogblue

Never done it, but I'd opt for 'sit there quietly and look sad'.

I attended funerals without even knowing the deceased person.

For the sandwiches?

It's not like I had anything to say in that matter. It was mostly family and my father apparently deemed them important enough to show up at their funerals, I guess.

I guess I can count myself lucky never having had to go to one... Only family I've seen dead was my great grandma, when I was a kid. Never been inside a cemetery in my life.

Really? You don't go around reading graves in old graveyards out of curiosity or anything like that?

My great grandma died in the middle of a party. Only a few years ago. She was right there in front of everyone...Didn't know her too well.

I hate funerals...

It's not so much the service, it's more of the fact that I have to say goodbye forever...

Woah, we posted at the same exact moment.

Our brains are connected

All the funerals I've been to were cremations. One on my first funeral, when I was 7, I saw the coffin of my grandma go into the machine...

Well, I am sure I saw a few funerals as a kid, but I don't remember them well. The first one that was about my family, and that I remember well, was when my grandmother on my father's side died. I was eight, I think.

My uncle — her first son — was the celebrant. Cannot have been easy for him.

edited 13th Jul '12 2:03:25 PM by Carciofus

I've been to a few. My first one was an uncle of my father's when I was in primary school. I hadn't known him, but it was still sad. I seem to remember that after the casket had been lowered and the words had been said, I was very confused about what my family was saying to the wife and children of the deceased. It sounded like "congratulations" (gratulerer in Norwegian", which I thought was kind of weird. But as I heard my parents say it, I first learnt the word "condolences" (kondolerer).

Woah, woah, woah...back up...

OP-dude: Did you say your nephew was shot?

edited 13th Jul '12 2:54:50 PM by InverurieJones

I've been to several funerals, but was always too young to understand what was going on and never knew the person in the box anyway. So I was never sad.

It was an accidental shooting. He and his friends were goofing around with a gun.

At least, that's what I heard.

I went to my great-uncle's funeral when I was like 2, I don't remember though. I also went to this woman who I didn't know's funeral (I think it was my mom's accountant's mom). It was pretty sad. I don't really like open casket funerals. I've had 2 other family members die (my grandma and my cousin) but I wasn't able to go.

I went to my paternal grandfather's funeral. It was kind of weird for me because, well, he'd never really wanted all that much to do with us kids so we didn't know him very well. I sang 'Amazing Grace', because he was really into singing, which was news to me.

A lot of people came up to me after and said "You have your grandfather's singing talent!", which was... odd. One person added "But thank God you don't have his nose."

But... yeah. Sometimes it can feel like you're being a fraud if you didn't know them all that well. Just be respectful.

The only funeral I remember attending was for my great-grandfather. I don't remember a ton because I was rather young at the time, but it was a military funeral because he had been an admiral in the navy. I remember being frightened by the loud noise when they fired guns in salute. As I said though, I was only like four years old at the time, so I barely remember.

My grandmother died two years ago, minus one month. I remember being the only person (or one of the only few) who did not shed a tear at the event. Even now, I still feel somewhat guilty about it.