First thing's first: KEEP. THIS. SHIT. CIVIL. If you can't talk about race without resorting to childish insults and rude generalizations or getting angry at people who don't see it your way, leave the thread.
With that said, I bring you to what can hopefully be the general thread about race.
First, a few starter questions.
- How, if at all, do you feel your race affects your everyday life?
- Do you believe that white people (or whatever the majority race in your area is) receive privileges simply because of the color of their skin. How much?
- Do you believe minorities are discriminated against for the same reason? How much?
- Do you believe that assimilation of cultures is better than people trying to keep their own?
- Affirmative Action. Yea, Nay? Why or why not?
Also, a personal question from me.
- Why (in my experience, not trying to generalize) do white people often try to insist that they aren't white? I can't count the number of times I've heard "I'm not white, I'm 1/4th English, 1/4th German, 1/4th Scandinavian 1/8th Cherokee, and 1/8th Russian," as though 4 of 5 of those things aren't considered "white" by the masses. Is it because you have pride for your ancestry, or an attempt to try and differentiate yourself from all those "other" white people? Or something else altogether?
edited 30th May '11 9:16:04 PM by Wulf
Why you are attracted to someone is more important to me. That can be taught and culturally reenforced.
Being attracted to green eyes could be innate. Only dating green eyed girls for that trait alone is conditioned, chosen, and wrong.
"Psssh. Even if you could catch a miracle on a picture any person would probably delete it to make space for more porn." - Aszur
In the pursuit of great, we failed to do good.
Why is it wrong? As long as they recognize that it's only their subjective preference and that there's nothing inherently wrong with non green eyed girls, I don't think it's wrong. It'd be a very specific and restricting fetish but if it's okay to be only attracted to people with certain genitals why not certain eye colors?
I think part of the problem from what people have said is if you're ascribing personality traits to a particular race and using that to justify whether or not you'll date that race. Dating Asian girls because you want a submissive girlfriend or not dating black guys because you think they're violent are where problems arise. Preferring to date a particular race because they usually have some kind if physical feature you're attracted to isn't as bad.
edited 16th Apr '14 7:09:45 AM by Kostya
![[nja]](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/user_ninja_2074.png "[nja]"){kind=small}
Why wrong? If a person simply isnt attracted to blue eyed women, then they arent. What would be wrong is treating women disrespectfully based on their eye color.
edited 16th Apr '14 5:54:31 AM by demarquis
![[up]](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/smiles/arrow_up.png "[up]"){kind=icon}
there you go.
There is nothing wrong with being attracted to a certain quality. There is something wrong with dating someone just for that quality.
I am not dating a black man for the novelty.
That is the word I am looking for. Don't reduce someone to a novelty.
I've mentioned before how Aprilla's roommate refuses to date anyone who isn't Asian. He is constantly having serious issues with language barriers, age difference, maturity issues, and just basic comparability because he's not dating someone awesome who happens to be Asian, he's dating them only because they are Asian.
That is a problem. That is racist. It may not be malicious, but it is still racist.
That being said I don't think avoiding romantic relationships with a certain group is inherently racist. Not getting into a relationship with someone whose ethnicity or cultural group may contradict yours or has conflicting life goals is being responsible. Example: A Muslim not dating an Atheist, or an American not dating a strict Bengali.
When that gets racist is what Kostya brought up: refusing to deal with Black attitudes or not dating an Asian man for fear he has a small penis.
"Psssh. Even if you could catch a miracle on a picture any person would probably delete it to make space for more porn." - Aszur
In the pursuit of great, we failed to do good.
Well, obviously dating only people with green eyes* is not the same as dating them only for their green eyes. No one (I hope) dates someone for just being male either. If that's the only thing you care about and are not even interested in their personality you can't expect a healthy relationship. It's reducing them from people to mere objects. It does not even matter if it's based on racism or something else, it's just stupid.
- just a stand-in for anything here
If only it was so obvious. That's one problem with interracial interactions, we have all sorts of generations of cultural baggage that go with it.
Romantic attraction plays into that.
Consider the beauty standards for natural African hair vs. styled and woven as an example.
"Psssh. Even if you could catch a miracle on a picture any person would probably delete it to make space for more porn." - Aszur
OK, I get 'ya now.
Okay Guy
Again, culture plays a big part in what's seen as attractive and racism unfortunately plays no small part in our culture. A lot of people who say they won't date a certain race aren't just talking about ascetic features.
It's not necessarily wrong to have a certain preference by itself, but we should accept that these preferences can sometimes be influenced by a broken culture. It should be very important to be aware of these cultural biases that can lead to these preferences.
edited 16th Apr '14 7:11:57 AM by DrStarky
Put me in motion, drink the potion, use the lotion, drain the ocean, cause commotion, fake devotion, entertain a notion, be Nova Scotian
Being aware of them is good but what should we do about them? Even if a person realizes that they're attracted to a particular trait because of cultural biases they can't just stop being attracted to that trait. The same holds true for them not finding something attractive.
That's the tricky part. You want to help encourage interracial communication and understanding. Guilt tripping people isn't going to help any more than forcing them.
The only thing I can think of is more positive cultural exchanges and interactions. Then we can naturally build from there
"Psssh. Even if you could catch a miracle on a picture any person would probably delete it to make space for more porn." - Aszur
Examples?
Hmm...
Better education system in general so even if you live in an area where a certain demographic is lacking, you're not a total dumbass.
I hate that's kinda my answer for everything but it solves so much.
Otherwise civic festivals or holidays is the only thing I can think of off the top of my head.
I wish I could depend on the media, but we all know how ganked up that is.
"Psssh. Even if you could catch a miracle on a picture any person would probably delete it to make space for more porn." - Aszur
The Mod with the Migraine
Media would be the best way to do things but that won't happen. What TV shows, movies, etc. present as attractive definitely has a big impact on people.
Well, I was thinking "more inter-racial sex", but that's just me.
Blowout soon fellow Stalker
I did like that one really cute Cheerios add
Oh really when?
Happy New Year!
it was a tab contrived don't Cha think?
edited 16th Apr '14 4:35:17 PM by joeyjojo
hashtagsarestupid
How was it contrived?
"Psssh. Even if you could catch a miracle on a picture any person would probably delete it to make space for more porn." - Aszur
Happy New Year!
Cheerios are full of goodness... (well i'm sceptical about that myself but that's neither here nor there), so let pour them on daddy's shirt while his sleeping!
If I pulled that should that sort of shit on my dad at that aged i'd be looking at a severe ass whooping.
edited 16th Apr '14 4:48:33 PM by joeyjojo
hashtagsarestupid
Nemesis
As a Brit who lives in America, it is extremely obvious how much the taboo against inter-racial sexual and romantic relations is kept to in the media, TV especially. You see it ALL the time. Two black characters of compatible genders and situations? They're almost guaranteed to have a relationship or sexual tension. Nobody else will be considered. If there's not someone of the same race on the show, they'll bring in a new character just for that purpose when they decide to have that kind of subplot going on.
A brighter future for a darker age.
I actually know too many parents who would find that endearing.
"Psssh. Even if you could catch a miracle on a picture any person would probably delete it to make space for more porn." - Aszur
Blowout soon fellow Stalker
They're good for your heart so you pour on daddy's heart.
It's cute.
edited 16th Apr '14 6:53:56 PM by LeGarcon
Oh really when?
My parents also disapprove of me dating outside my race but they claim that's more because they're afraid of how the children would be treated if it got serious enough. I think that's a stupid reason to be honest, especially if you really love a person.
So based on your stories, it does sound a lot like sexual orientation. Some people are just attracted to "X", whatever X may be, and that's just the way they are, but certain others are assholes about it. I may be attracted to women exclusively, but I dont have to be a homophobe. I could also be attracted to Asian women, but again, I dont have to be a racist about it.