Doing something hilariously stupid

Not the kind of stupid that gets you hurt. Not the kind of stupid that gets others hurt (physically or emotionally). But that everyday kind of stupid where your brain temporarily goes out to lunch, yet you are able to recognize the stupid and laugh about it despite not having a brain at the moment.

I just did this: Tonight, after dinner, I had an ice cream sandwich for dessert.*

Now, if you've ever eaten an ice cream sandwich before, you know that they leave lots of little brownish-black crumbs on your fingers because that chocolately "cookie" thing they come wrapped in is weirdly sticky. I licked my fingers off, but they were still kind of sticky, so I decided to go wash them off in the kitchen sink.

Now, on the windowsill in the kitchen, I have a little "garden" of small plants in pots. After washing my hands, I decided to check the soil in them with my fingers to see if any of them needed watering. No, they were still plenty moist.

So as I'm walking away from this, I look down at my fingers and see small, brownish-black crumbs on my fingers: "Oops, guess I didn't get all the chocolate stuff. Well, I'll just lick it off..."

On the plus side, I can now say "This tastes like dirt" with authority.

"Proto-Indo-European makes the damnedest words related. It's great. It's the Kevin Bacon of etymology." ~Madrugada

You know you can avoid those crumbs if you just switch hands every minute or so? They sort of melt if you let them get warm.

I laughed. Well done.

Swordsman Troper — Reclaiming The Blade — Watch

Guh, I do this shit all the time.

I did it a hell of a lot while playing Portal 2 co-op.

More than a few deaths happened because me or my partner remembered far too late that "Wait, those energy barriers destroy our portals" or "In retrospect, moving the energy bridge while you were standing on it was a pretty bad idea" or "Oh, right. I need to hold the button down."

It's fun.

One of my few regrets about being born female is the inability to grow a handlebar mustache. -Landstander

I debating what's more stupid, accidentally eating dirt or eating M&Ms that were found on the ground.

"It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open one’s mouth and remove all doubt." - Some guy with a snazzy hat.

"[The slice of Cheesecake] was left unattended for 48 hours, in a public area. It's mine now."

-mrsaturn *

edited 1st May '11 4:58:23 PM by mrsaturn

They assed first. I am only retaliating in an ass way. -The Dead Man's Life

"This laser pointer only seems to be lighting half the time. I'll just look into the lens and press the button to see what the problem is!"

Heapers’ Hangout

"I can't read this sign. It's on a fence. It's in German. It has pictures of lightning bolts on it, and an audible hum is coming from the fence."

...

"It's probably not electric."

*KERZAP*

One of my few regrets about being born female is the inability to grow a handlebar mustache. -Landstander

Random story: Apparently when I was little I refused to eat chocolate. Then I unknowingly ate some M&Ms I found on the floor.

Anyways, yesterday I decided to climb on a playground in a fancy dress and heels...

But no lasting harm was done, right?

...right?

edited 2nd May '11 4:43:40 PM by Lumiere305

Yeah, I'm fine now.

(Luckily it was a pretty dim laser pointer; I think the battery was low, thus causing the not-lighting-all-the-time problem in the first place)

Heapers’ Hangout

In grade four, I decided it would be awesome fun to run as fast as I could down a very steep hill!

... I broke both bones in my wrist.

Be not afraid...

Along the same vein, I once challenged my little brother at a game of "roll on your sides down the hill, as fast as you can". Of course Mr. Big Pointy Stone Hidden in the Grass had something to say on the matter, and broke my right arm.

A few years before that, the same brother challenged me at a game of "try to run over the other with your bike". I was easily avoided his bike, but I went face-first against a wall while doing so and broke my left wrist.

And a few years before that, again the same brother challenged me to jump over a pretty high metal chain. I failed, fell badly on the concrete, and shattered my right wrist - it's fine now, but that took some time.

Come to think of it, my little brother was never very good for my health — we had this whole thing about challenging each other at silly stunts...

Harmless? No.

Hilariously stupid, though? Thinking back to the whole matter... YES.

edited 3rd May '11 7:12:14 AM by Carciofus

But they seem to know where they are going, the ones who walk away from Omelas.

My biggest airhead moment of all time was wondering where my car keys were while I was driving my car. I pulled off to the side of the road to start looking for them and everything. I, of course, found them in the ignition.

edited 3rd May '11 1:06:26 PM by Bur

i. hear. a. sound.

My entire thought process when I'm not doing work

Me: "I think I'll go and edit the page of a work I read" Also me: Get frustrated at the editing UI, gives up, and hopes someone else does i

For my poetry class we were required to memorize and recite a poem with a minimum of 14 lines. I decided to recite "The Midnight Ride of Paul Revere". A day before the assignment was due. After all, my brother was able to recite it all in 5th grade... though he later informed me it was because he had Training from Hell.

I was certain I had it all memorized in two hours and then it all drained out of my head as I started in class. The teacher ended up giving me a second chance to memorize it during class, and I ended up cramming all five pages as hard as I could again. The second time, I got about halfway before he stopped me, deciding I had already passed the 14 line limit two minutes ago and he didn't want to watch me suffer through the rest of it.

Put the milk in before my cereal this morning

Oh really when?