"Dude, grow up" vs. "Dude, not funny."

Ah. Then I think you've hit the nail upon the head as far as this disagreement is concerned; we have fundamentally different expectations.

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I expect heroics, because it gives me something to strive for always. I'm not there yet but I'M STILL TRYING DAMMIT!!

If I were to write some of the strange things that come under my eyes they would not be believed. ~Cora M. Strayer~

Much like Prolife vs Prochoice, Life sentence vs death sentence, Deport everything vs keep immigrants, This debate will never reach closure. Glory be, Amen.

ALL CREATURE WILL DIE AND ALL THE THINGS WILL BE BROKEN. THAT'S THE LAW OF SAMURAI.

The problem with "don't let them get to you" is while it generally works okayish IRL. It doesn't work very well if at all online. There are a few reasons why this is so.

1. As pretty much everyone knows. If you're on the computer, you have a wealth of information at your fingertips, and someone with good Googling skills can not just find this information, but make it agree with anything they have to say. Even if this is an opinion or an insult.
2. On forums in particular, the internet is not situational. You can't go away from a person from a forum. You're either on the same site as them, or you're not. Period, and there is generally no way to practically avoid people on forums. Short of ignore scripts, which are vastly useful.
3. The phrase is often used as an excuse to be a dickhead. Now I am a tolerant person, and I can find jokes about just about anything funny. Including myself, if they're actually funny. But the difference between a jackass and a comedian is that the latter does it to be funny, and in good humor. You are extremely unlikely to find a jackass who cares about whether or not what he said is found funny. As for finding things funny, here's the issue.
   1. Funny is by consensus. If you say something, and most of the people in the room find it funny. It's funny. End of story, no dispute. If people don't find it funny. It's not funny. Again, end of story. No dispute. But there's a problem with this too, in that some of the people in the "don't find it funny" camp will inevitably offended, but there's an easy way around this. Go back to Point #3, if you care that the people in question have been offended, then you're a comedian. If you don't, you're probably a jackass, regardless of whether or not you know it. But there's a problem here too,
   2. Some people enjoy being offended, and will get offended about everything in an effort to make people uncomfortable. But this too is easily resolvable by going to Point #3 and switching it up a bit. If someone is genuinely upset by something you've said, apologize. If you think they fall into this category, call them out on it. It's not a perfect system, but most people who do this will either fess up or shut up when confronted with it.

I spread my wings and I learn how to fly....

^What's stopping you from turning off the PC and walk away?

What in my post are you responding to?

I spread my wings and I learn how to fly....

^^ I don't understand. Are you saying that because of the someone else's behavior, you should be the one that comes off at a loss?

Eh, this isn't going anywhere. Dropping from this thread.

edited 15th Jan '11 1:43:32 PM by Arha

Probably a smart idea. I got linked here from elsewhere and felt the need to deposit my two cents.

I spread my wings and I learn how to fly....

If you have issues with an individual on the forum; say somebody is harassing you via cyber-bullying, what's stopping you from turning off the PC and walking away?

Surely though the idea is to target the problem (the Bully) in a case like that?
As after all Everybody: The wiki is only interested in hosting a friendly, civil forum.

By the powers invested in me by tabloid-reading imbeciles, I pronounce you guilty of paedophilia!

^If you're set o targeting the bully, wait until they start something IRL, then retaliate. Simple as that.

Well if they are not interested in a friendly civil forum, by the fact they are bullying another member then the way for them to be dealt with would be on the forum?

My whole view of the topic:
I like tasteless and offensive humour and so don't think there is a general "Dude Not Funny", however each individual may have their own idea of "Dude Not Funny".

So with people like this either:
a.) They understand if I tell joke relating to their "Dude Not funny" I'm not being serious.
or
b.) The topic is seriously emotionally upsetting for them.

If a.) then no worries.
If b.) then I'll exercise tact as making them upset just for my pleasure is not something I want to do.

Edit: I typed some horrific sentence that needed fixing.

edited 15th Jan '11 3:25:09 PM by IanExMachina

By the powers invested in me by tabloid-reading imbeciles, I pronounce you guilty of paedophilia!

Both, if you're going with the "job" model. Human interaction is a two way street.

I do not entirely adhere to the "job" model. Rather than jobs, I would say that there are actions and consequences, and that which actions one "should" take depends on which consequences one seeks. Both of the "jobs" you mention above are advisable for people who seek to prevent unnecessary conflict.

The thought suddenly occurs: when I think of "heroics", I don't ordinarily think of fending for oneself, but of going beyond that and defending other people as well.

Which means that "Dude, grow up" does not seem like a heroic stance to take.

Nothing but the fact that the forum was fun until some dickweed came along and made it an unpleasant experience.

One might remain on a forum out of defiance or hope that said dickweed will go away, but find the experience much less enjoyable than it used to be.

edited 15th Jan '11 8:27:44 PM by BobbyG

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So does shooting or getting into nigga moments an acceptable way if dealing with it? Pleasesayyespleasesayyespleasesayyespleasesayyespleasesayyes......

WHASSUP....... ....with lolis!

Well it's kind of heard to continue hostilities when you're dead...

@Bobby: By that logic then there are several people I would like to see banned. But they won't be and I guarantee if I did really ask for it the response would be get over it or suck it up or go away.

Who watches the watchmen?