[[WMG: The end of the play was an {{inverted}} "[[PleaseWakeUp Death=Sleep]]" and "[[PhallicWeapon Sword In My Pocket]]" combo metaphor.]]
Romeo goes to the tomb and gets blitzed drunk on the "poison" (as in "[[DrinkOrder What's your poison?]]" or "[[Creator/{{Plato}} the measure makes the poison]]"). Juliet's [[TrueLovesKiss kiss]] wakes [[GenderFlip him]] up, and she sheathes his knife within her... heart. Then they skip town and leave the friar to explain his knowledge of the situation, and Prince Escalus makes [[AnAesop his heartfelt speech about the maleficence of feuds]] either before [[XanatosSpeedChess or]] [[GovernmentConspiracy after]] discovering the truth.

[[WMG: The entire "You didn't leave me any poison, perhaps I'll kiss you and see if there's any left on your lips" speech was a parody or [[SubvertedTrope subversion]] of TrueLovesKiss.]]
Were it a [[PlayingWithATrope genderbent]] fairy tale, Romeo would have woken up. Since it was [[TropeOverdosed Shake]][[SeinfeldIsUnfunny speare]], [[TwistEnding he didn't]], and [[DownerEnding Juliet killed herself]].

[[WMG: The Capulets and Montagues are Mafia families.]]
This would explain why the feuding is so heated, and why the prince (who may or may not be the Godfather in actuality) is the only one to intervene.
* Isn't this similar to how the [[Film/WilliamShakespearesRomeoAndJuliet Baz Luhrmann film]] played it? (Other than that the "Prince" is a cop surnamed Prince!)
** It's probably more accurate to say that Mafia ethics are an extension of Mediterranean views on family honour and violence which would have been mainstream in middle- and upper-class Italian society at the time ''Romeo and Juliet'' is set. Good call though.

[[WMG: Benvolio orchestrated everything.]]
Because he is the next Montague heir in line, he plotted - possibly with Rosaline - to get Romeo to marry someone unsuitable and get disowned, so that he would inherit the Montague fortune. However, after Mercutio - the one person Benvolio truly cares about - is killed, partly because of his plotting, Benvolio decides to get revenge by orchestrating the death of everyone else.

[[WMG: Friar Lawrence orchestrated everything]]
He didn't send the letter, deliberately driving Romeo and Juliet to suicide, in order to show the families how futile their feud was.

[[WMG: Romeo and Juliet already knew each other.]]
Rosaline? Invented so that Romeo's friends wouldn't suspect him of loving a Capulet (or being gay). The conversation at the masque? Playful flirtation. Juliet's surprise at learning his identity? Sarcasm, of the "isn't playing with fire FUN?" variety. Of course, this isn't the original intent of the story, but it would be interesting to see their relationship played this way.
* Rosaline ''was'' a Capulet--Lord Capulet's niece, as mentioned in the party guest list. However, it could seem a lot safer for Romeo's friends to think he was in love with part of the Capulet extended family as opposed to Lord and Lady Capulet's only child. I like this theory. It certainly puts Romeo and Juliet in a better light--even if they're still acting like idiots, they at least have built a loving, lasting relationship with each other before deciding to get married/die for their love.
** Did Romeo ever tell anyone other than Friar Lawrence that he had been in love with Rosaline? The name never came up in his conversation with Benvolio before the party. Romeo did say that he was in love with a woman, but not which woman in particular.

[[WMG:Benvolio is dead by the end.]]
I've always thought it seems a bit weird that he just stops appearing after Mercutio dies. Perhaps they were actually [[YaoiGuys in love]] and he just nipped off to kill himself right after Mercutio's death. Or maybe after hearing that Romeo had killed himself, he decided that as all his friends were dead, he had nothing left to live for. He's just a sensitive sort of guy, which is why he's opposed to everyone else's constant fighting. It's just no one had noticed he was dead yet by the end of the play, which is why no one talks about it. But that's why he abruptly stops appearing.

[[WMG: The mutual hatred between the Capulets and Montagues stems from them being [[AssassinsCreed Assassins and Templars]]]]
Which one is which is anyone's guess, though.

[[WMG: Mercutio is in love with Romeo.]]
He seems to be jealous of Romeo and Juliet's relationship, and he is 'extremely' close to Romeo.
* There's one hole in your theory, which is that Mercutio never had a clue Romeo and Juliet were even dating. Romeo and ''Rosalind,'' Mercutio openly and constantly laughs at.

[[WMG: Benvolio killed Tybalt's father.]]
In ''Theatre/RomeoAndJuliet'', Tybalt Capulet is introduced as a volatile, violent person who loathes the Montagues even more than his kinsmen do. This suggests that he has a personal motive for hating Montagues; even Boss Capulet himself has to restrain him from murdering Romeo at the party. This motive is personal enough.

This interpretation is good because it gives Tybalt a deeper motive and makes his character more understandable.

* But if Benvolio was the one who killed Tybalt's father, why does Tybalt completely ignore Benvolio both at the party and later in Act III? Tybalt seems far more interested in going after the higher ranking members of the Montague family, such as Romeo, and attacks Benvolio only when he doesn't have a better target available.
* Tybalt cares more about killing Romeo than Benvolio. He does claim to hate Benvolio--"As I hate hell, all Montagues and thee"--but that seems like a pretty impersonal hatred. He hates Benvolio simply because he hates all the Montagues, and he hates Romeo still more. I think it's far more likely that one of the other Montagues killed Tybalt's father, and now Tybalt hates the whole lot of them. (Perhaps the death of Tybalt's father started the feud?)
** Besides, Benvolio is young (he seems to be about Romeo's age), and he's also a peace-loving and gentle guy. I doubt that he's the type who would have killed Tybalt's father--or even have been able to--and if he had, I'm sure Escalus wouldn't have allowed him to simply go on living in Verona.

[[WMG: The play "Romeo and Juliet" is a {{fanfiction}} written by Shakespeare.]]
Mercutio is the main character of another work of fiction, possibly a high school dramedy. He is paired with Juliet in canon. Romeo is his sidekick and is canonically paired with Rosaline. Shakespeare ships Romeo/Juliet, and the play is his Medieval AU fanfic.

This would explain why Rosaline is instantly put on a bus while Romeo and Juliet fall in "true love" instantly. It also explains why the plot seems so rushed and why Romeo and Juliet are "so in love" that they get married within two days of meeting each other. Shakespeare is a rabid shipper and an awful writer.

This would also explain why they're only fourteen (well, Juliet is). Shakespeare probably set the fic in Renaissance Italy so that he could get away with having highschool-aged characters getting married.

Alas, the work this is a fanfic ''of'' was lost. Manuscript preservation was not as high a priority back then as it is now.
* You know, that explains the Queen Mab sequence really well. It smacks of fanfic: PurpleProse, excessive length, deep emotional significance, and no point whatsoever to the actual story.

[[WMG: ''Romeo and Juliet'' was a [[BlackComedy Dark Parody.]]]]
First of all, ''A Midsummer Night's Dream'' was written before R&J and has as a major theme that young love is foolish. This is also pointed out by several characters in ''Romeo and Juliet''; they tell Romeo that he's being stupid thinking that he is truly in love with a girl he only met a few days before. Mercutio made fun of him for being in love with Rosaline, whom Romeo has never really talked to, right when Romeo decides, "Oh no, I don't love Rosaline anymore. I love Juliet!"

Also, there is the famous line from ''Julius Caesar'' (another play that predates ''Romeo and Juliet'') - "The fault... is not in our stars, But in ourselves..." But Romeo blames ''all'' his screw-ups on the stars. He kills both Tybalt and Paris, and then whines about how '''his killing them''' is the stars' fault.

** ''Julius Caesar'' was written several years after ''Romeo and Juliet'', soon before ''Hamlet''. Also, the story of "Romeo and Juliet" predates Shakespeare.

** Also, it is very easy (when you do the RESEARCH) to find that "A Midsummer Night's Dream" was NOT written before "Romeo and Juliet" - the dialogue of "Pyramus and Thisbe" and the action of it are Shakespeare's own self-parody. Even direct lines are connected - Juliet's "O happy dagger" turned to Thisbe/Flute's "Come, trusty sword".

[[WMG: Romeo and Juliet died because Mercutio [[DyingCurse cursed their families]].]]
Up to that point, if Romeo had just left well enough alone, Tybalt would have been the only one in trouble. The ''second'' that Mercutio finishes his "plague a' both your houses" rant and gets dragged offstage to die, Romeo begins to muse that he shouldn't have been such a pacifist, and by the time Tybalt returns ''(very'' conveniently, one might say) he's ready to run him through--which he ''instantly'' regrets doing.

Because of this sudden and somewhat out-of-character piece of violence (isn't Tybalt supposed to be an expert swordfighter? Couldn't he have dealt with Romeo, who ''never'' involves himself in the fighting?), Romeo is banished, setting fire to a chain of events that end with the parents discovering Romeo and Juliet lying dead. If killing off the respective only children of the FeudingFamilies--and killing them with ''love'', the thing Mercutio despises most--wasn't the worst punishment a vengeful spirit could have devised, I don't know what was. (Plus, Tybalt, Mercutio's murderer and related by marriage to the Capulets, gets killed first--and didn't Mercutio say "your houses!" ''[[RuleOfThree three]]'' times?)

Those who believe that Mercutio has a connection to the supernatural ("Queen Mab", anyone?) should find this theory especially attractive.

[[WMG: Lord Capulet's fiancé started the feud by marrying his friend Lord Montague instead.]]
[[http://themasterofverona.typepad.com/the_master_of_verona/the-origin-of-the-capuletmontague-feud.html This]] explains it all.

[[WMG: Mercutio is in love with Juliet.]]
People tend to assume that it's Romeo he's in love with, but he appears to be straight. The Arthur Brook poem "Romeus and Juliet", which Shakespeare copied almost detail for detail, doesn't feature Mercutio the way the play does. He appears in only ''one'' scene--right before Romeo and Juliet meet at the party, he's apparently trying to woo Juliet, but Romeo comes in and steals her.

In Shakespeare, Mercutio comes in somewhat randomly--we hear nothing about him until he suddenly shows up with the others to go to the party. It could be that he just wants to have a good time and pick up some chicks--but it ''also'' could be that he's been [[StalkerWithACrush watching Juliet from afar for some time]]. They don't talk about it because it's being kept low-key; Mercutio's embarrassed about being in love, and mocks Romeo about Rosaline to keep up his "I'm too cool for deeper feelings" image. As a relative of the prince, Mercutio would be in good standing to gain Juliet as a wife--her parents are eager enough to get her married to Paris, the prince's other relative.

Now imagine Mercutio's thought process as Romeo waltzes in and steals Juliet--why shouldn't he feel betrayed and angry, especially since Romeo was [[SerialRomeo obsessing over Rosalind mere moments ago?]]

He plays dumb about it, pretending not to notice or care, in accordance with his SadClown nature, joking around with Romeo (who he still really cares about--they've been friends for a long time) and attempting to make him reject love (so he can have Juliet). The hurt and betrayal he feels don't come out until his death (which Romeo pretty much caused), at which point he curses the Montagues and the Capulets--"They have made worm's meat of me."

Also, why is he so eager to attack Tybalt? Because Tybalt is Juliet's cousin, and Mercutio is HotBlooded enough to take out his angst on someone marginally involved that he's not particularly attached to.

[[WMG: Tybalt is in love with Juliet.]]
Used in the French musical, but it's not terribly unlikely. It's possible Tybalt knows about Romeo's relationship with Juliet and wants to get rid of him out of family pride, big brother instinct...or thwarted love.

Cousins married cousins all the time back then, and when you consider how clannish Tybalt is...