"Chocolate Milk" is the second episode of Brooklyn Nine-Nine's second season.
Peralta and Jeffords investigate the stabbing of the proprietor of a chocolate milk restaurant.
Meanwhile, Captain Holt enlists Santiago's help in sucking up to a superior officer coming in to inspect the Nine-Nine. Unfortunately, the officer they expected had retired and the inspecting officer ends up being Holt's old partner, with whom he has a decades-long rivalry.
Also, Jeffords is preparing to get a vasectomy and Boyle is desperately looking for a date to his ex-wife and her new fiance's engagement party.
Tropes present in this episode:
- Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking: The reasons behind Holt and Wuntch's feud start with Holt believing Wuntch sabotaged his career because he rejected her advances and informed her he was gay. They then cycle through Wuntch shooting Holt, Holt trying to get her kicked out of the force due to the previous incident, and Wuntch destroying Holt's personnel file while he was undercover, before finally ending on a vague incident where the actions of one or the other led to Wuntch being embarrassed in front of former New York Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter. Judging by their reactions, the latter is clearly considered the most serious.
- The B Grade: Played with; Santiago gets into a borderline panic over the possibility of the precinct failing Wuntch's evaluation, partly because it might mean Holt losing his job (and Santiago her would-be mentor), and partly because she hasn't received a failing grade for anything since second grade... when she somehow managed to fail recess.Santiago: [Bitter mimicry] "Teachers need a break too, Amy!"
- Cordon Bleugh Chef: The hipster chocolate milk restaurant owner presents Peralta and Jeffords with an ink-black concoction he calls "dark milk" that uses bitter chocolate to enhance the sourness of raw milk. Peralta and Jeffords are not pleased.Peralta: That's the worst part about both of those things!
- Friendship Denial: Downplayed as while Jeffords does admit he and Peralta are friends, he insists that he's simply a "work friend" instead of a "friend friend". By the end of the episode however Jeffords is touched by all the effort Peralta put in to helping him and acknowledges that they are friends, before forcing Peralta to eat some carrots since as his friend he's worried about his health.
- Hurricane of Puns: The team delivers a torrent of genitalia-related puns when they discover that Jeffords is going in for a vasectomy.
- In-Universe Factoid Failure: Peralta genuinely believes that a vasectomy involves amputating the penis.Peralta: Is his voice all high pitched now?Doctor: No! Of course not!
- Never Gets Drunk: Or in this case: Never Gets Anesthetized. Jeffords is so large that the hospital ran out of drugs while trying to put him under. While the medication doesn't knock him out, it does get him high as a kite:Terry: They made me a superhero. I'm so strong! [notices his hands and gasps] And they made me black!
- Manchild: Heavy anaesthetics apparently bring this out in Jeffords:Peralta: Alright, we got your PJs on, read you a story, checked under the bed for monsters...
Jeffords: Check again! - Noodle Incident: Holt and Wuntch were involved in an incident that concluded with Wuntch being embarrassed in front of Derek Jeter.
- Sitcom Arch-Nemesis: Tensions rise when Holt and Wuntch are in a room together. It is a rivalry that extends back more than 20 years to when Holt thought Wuntch intentionally sabotaged his chances of getting a promotion. The rivalry is so bad that Wuntch tried to make Holt disappear by burning his personnel file while he was undercover. Not to mention the fact that she shot him under an extremely thin pretense.Holt: Captain Wuntch! Good to see you...but if you're here...who's guarding Hades?
- Themed Party: Charles goes to a Jamaican-themed party which is actually his ex-wife's engagement party. It's called "Jamaican Me Marry You" because they travel to Jamaica frequently. He desperately tries to find a date. His crush Rosa Diaz agrees to go with him as a favour for a friend, and she even wears a matching dress. It's one of the first times she is not dressed in her signature black leather jacket.
- What the Hell, Hero?: Santiago uncharacteristically gives Holt an angry pep talk when the captain seems to give up on impressing Wuntch and is resigned to losing his job. Santiago walks away, wide-eyed, not really believing she just did that.Santiago: Cajole up, Captain!
- Your Approval Fills Me with Shame: Boyle realizes that his wardrobe choice for his ex-wife and her fiance's engagement party is the wrong one when Hitchcock compliments him.
