History Quotes / VillainsOutShopping

-->--'''[[VillainProtagonist Doctor Impossible]]''', ''Literature/SoonIWillBeInvincible''

-->-- ''An Unattractive Vampire'' by [=Jim McDoniel=]

-->--'''Gilgamesh Wulfenbach''' on his father Klaus, in ''Webcomic/GirlGenius'' ([[https://www.girlgeniusonline.com/comic.php?date=20090812 Vol. IX p. 77]])

->''"Look, Perry the Platypus, just because ''I'm'' [[CardCarryingVillain evil]] doesn't mean everything I ''do'' is evil.''"
-->-- '''Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz''', ''WesternAnimation/PhineasAndFerb'', "[[Recap/PhineasAndFerbTheBalladOfBadbeard The Ballad of Badbeard]]"

->''"The secret wars, assassinations, and the wholesale planet destruction can wait.\\
I'm treating myself...\\
to a little Caribbean Vacay."''
-->-- '''Archcount Obdrath Von Lucifuge''', ''Starslip Crisis''

->''"Wednesday, we spill the blood of virgin chickens. Thursday we anoint ourselves in said blood. Friday is, of course, poker night."''
-->-- '''Cultist of Shadow''', ''VideoGame/{{Fable}}''

'''Newsreader:''' Also does a review of ''Film/SeventeenAgain''.\\

-->-- ''Beau Peep''

'''Duck:''' [[AtLeastIAdmitIt To save face and not sound like a jackass I'll be frank, my goal is world domination.]]\\

-->--'''[[http://docohobigfinish.blogspot.co.uk/2014/11/dark-eyes-iii-death-of-hope-written-by.html Joe Ford]]''' on AudioPlay/BigFinishDoctorWho'', ''Dark Eyes III: Death of Hope''

->''"Zod at a coffeehouse. That's [[AGoodNameForARockBand the name of my new beat play]]. But anyway, we see Zod not making people kneel...but instead getting coffee. Menacing indeed."''
-->--'''Neal Bailey''' [[http://www.supermanhomepage.com/tv/tv.php?topic=reviews/smallville9-ep06 on]] ''{{Series/Smallville}}'' ("Crossfire")

->''[[SarcasmMode That's cute]], Thanos has [[CallToAgriculture a retirement plan.]]''
-->---'''James "Rhodey" Rhodes/War Machine''', ''Film/AvengersEndgame''

->'''Sgt Bidet''': He's out there somewhere, Peep. A ruthless, bloodthirsty killer.\\
''(Cut to the Nomad under a palm tree with a bag of sweets)''\\
'''Nomad''': Oh goody, nothing but red ones left!
-->--''Beau Peep''

->''[[SerialKillerKiller Light]] since nobody's home right now let's play Videogame/MarioGolf. We haven't played in a while.''
-->--'''[[{{Shinigami}} Ryuk]]''', ''Manga/DeathNote''

->''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6fu2nykadfY&list=PL66A1A5413B5E90F8&index=114&feature=plpp_video As I'm walking down the street / wanna kill everyone that I meet / Look at that top, it's sweet!]]''

-> ''Look, Perry the Platypus, just because'' I'm ''[[CardCarryingVillain evil]] doesn't mean everything I'' do ''is evil''.
-->-- '''Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz''', ''WesternAnimation/PhineasAndFerb''; "The Ballad of Badbeard"

->''At four PM, I shall return home for a nap and an early dinner... ...At seven, I shall go the gala at Buckingham Palace and blow the place to kingdom come!''
-->-- '''Professor James Moriarty''', ''Franchise/SherlockHolmes radio drama''

-->--'''Chris Sims''' on ''Film/SupermanIVTheQuestForPeace''

->''The secret wars, assassinations, and the wholesale planet destruction can wait.''
->''I'm treating myself...''
->''to a little Caribbean Vacay''

->'''Newsreader''': Voldemort blogs about [his return to power] on his new [=FlooTube=] channel.
->'''Voldemort''': I'M GONNA FIND HARRY POTTER AND I'M GONNA [''bleep''] IN HIS [''bleep'']!
->'''Newsreader''': Also does a review of ''Film/SeventeenAgain''.
->'''Voldemort''': Well, it was a little slow at the beginning, but come on: Creator/ZacEfron! Zefron! 'Nuff said.

->''"The [Decepticon Justice Division] were never going to be utterly murderous, terrifying, super-evil monsters 24/7, because who is like that, really? But given that, as readers, you weren't afforded a privileged 'off-stage' glimpse into their lives until #39, but instead saw them as the 'in universe' characters did, of course based on the info given you're gonna assume they're 100% awful - everyone 'in universe' does."''

-->--'''Dr. Drakken,''' ''WesternAnimation/KimPossible''

->''Don't bother me, Knuckles! I just want to play some slots!''

->[[VillainProtagonist The vampire]] moped for a week. Not in the way that one might expect him to — [[VillainousBreakdown with fire and death, blood running red in the streets, and a dark miasma blotting out the sun]]. No, the vampire moped pretty much the same way everyone else does — he watched television.
-->-- ''Literature/AnUnattractiveVampire'' by [=Jim McDoniel=]

-->--Fawful, ''[[VideoGame/MarioAndLuigiBowsersInsideStory Mario and Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story]]''

->'''Ganyu:''' I think you've had enough. About time you tell us your plan, no?
->'''[[{{Mook}} Fatui Skirmisher]]:''' Plan... What plan?
->'''Ganyu:''' We just taught you a lesson, but clearly, you weren't paying attention. If you don't spill whatever you're scheming against Liyue... We'll be forced to use harsher methods.
->'''Fatui Skirmisher:''' I'm telling the truth. There's no scheme.
->'''Ganyu:''' If you're telling the truth, then why would you, a member of the Fatui, suddenly appear on the outskirts of Qingce Village?
->'''Fatui Skirmisher:''' Fine. If you really want know, then, well... I was about to...
->'''Paimon:''' About to... what?
->'''Fatui Skirmisher:''' ...pick berries over there.
->'''Ganyu:''' Uhh... I must admit, I didn't expect you to come up with a silly excuse.
->'''Fatui Skirmisher:''' It's not an excuse! I rarely have a free morning, and I heard that there were fresh berries in this area... Think about it. I'm here alone and Qingce Village is nothing more than a retirement spot for old people. What could I be scheming anyway?
->'''Paimon:''' Judging by how he's looking at us, it does seem like he feels like he's the victim here.
->'''Ganyu:''' So you have nothing to do with the occupation of Fanmu Carpenter's warehouse?
->'''Fatui Skirmisher:''' Fanmu Carpenter's warehouse? Where is that? [[NotMeThisTime I swear, I only came here to pick berries, that's all]].
-->--Sea of Clouds, Sea of People, ''VideoGame/GenshinImpact''

->'''[[YesMan Agent Stone]]''': I just thought you might like a latte with steamed Austrian goat milk?\\
'''[[MorallyAmbiguousDoctorate Dr. Robotnik]]''': ...What do I look like, an imbecile? [[PetTheDog Of course I want a latte]]. '''[[SuddenlyShouting I LOVE THE WAY YOU MAKE THEM]]!'''
-->-- ''Film/SonicTheHedgehog2020''

-->--''An Unattractive Vampire'' by [=Jim McDoniel=]

-->--Sea of Clouds, Sea of People, ''VideoGame/GenshinImpact''

-->--Fawful, ''[[VideoGame/MarioAndLuigiBowsersInsideStory Mario and Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story]]''

-->--''An Unattractive Vampire'' by [=Jim McDoniel=]