Herc: But what if we wanted to get married?
Carolyn: But we don't want to get married, though, do we? Not in the least tiniest little bit.
Herc: I might want to.
Carolyn: Yes, Hercules, but let's face facts: you wanting to get married is like other people wanting to sneeze.
Carolyn: But we don't want to get married, though, do we? Not in the least tiniest little bit.
Herc: I might want to.
Carolyn: Yes, Hercules, but let's face facts: you wanting to get married is like other people wanting to sneeze.
—Cabin Pressure, "Vaduz"
"I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man, I keep his house."
—Zsa Zsa Gabor
"How you got three women to marry you, I'll never know."
—Joey to Ross, Friends, "The One Where Ross Got High"
Hal Roach: What are you looking for, Stan?
Stan Laurel: I'm looking for a fair price for a Laurel and Hardy picture, and you know it. Our films sell all over the world and we haven't got a dime!
Roach: That's 'cause you keep getting divorced!
Stan Laurel: I'm looking for a fair price for a Laurel and Hardy picture, and you know it. Our films sell all over the world and we haven't got a dime!
Roach: That's 'cause you keep getting divorced!
Cardinal Wolsey: Do you, Henry, take this woman to-
King Henry: I do, and so does she. Right love, that's it, through there.
Mrs. Prodworthy: Damn it, I've buried three husbands.
Mayor Bumble: I'm not surprised to 'ear it!
"You're on your fourth wife, talk about the (E)X-Games"
— Wayne Gretzky to Tony Hawk, Epic Rap Battles of History
Dr. Alan Grant: You got any kids?
Dr. Ian Malcolm: Me? Oh, hell yeah, three. I love kids. Anything at all can and does happen. Same with wives, for that matter.
Alan: You're married?
Ian: Occasionally. Yeah, I'm always on the lookout for a future ex-Mrs. Malcolm.