->''"I hear the Super Nintendo version didn't have a countdown timer, and actually explained the plot a bit better, but like I said, I played the [[UsefulNotes/SegaGenesis Genesis]] version as a kid, so here I am!"''
-->-- '''[[WebVideo/AtopTheFourthWall Linkara]]''', "Wolverine: Adamantium Rage"

->''"And now for the UsefulNotes/{{Amstrad|CPC}} version. What can I say? Words such as travesty leap to mind. Surely there's some mistake. This isn't the ''VideoGame/OutRun'' we know and love. This is something else, something indefinable, something which wants to make you scream and [[{{Headdesk}} bang your head against the nearest solid object]], something you will regret spending your money on."''
-->-- ''Computer + Video Games'' magazine

->''"Do I need to explain why the game sucked? It's called ''Santa Claus Saves the Earth'', and it looked like that, for fuck sake! So do you know what is [[SarcasmMode even better than that]]? Oh, I dunno, compressing it, zooming it in, making the controls stiffer, the visuals shittier, the music even more unbearable, the performance worse, and making it portable! [[SarcasmMode Yay.]]"''
-->-- '''WebVideo/{{Caddicarus}}''', [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TP7EGiaa6W0 on the GBA port of]] ''Santa Claus Saves the Earth''.

->VideoGame/BatmanArkhamKnight'' deserves a place on this list for the sheer bloody horror show that was the PC version of the game. While running OK on consoles, ''Arkham Knight'''s simultaneous PC launch was a disaster. The game ran like shit on an unforgivable number of systems, with skipping and framerate dips that ranged from playable for some to downright unbearable for others. I had one of the better experiences, and it was still fucking atrocious. Absolutely unacceptable from a big-name publisher.''
-->-- '''[[WebVideo/{{Jimquisition}} Jim Sterling]]''', ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8nd6I9W_z6Y Top Ten Shittiest Games of 2015]]''

->'''''2) Thou shalt make sure your game actually works.'''\\
\\
We're ashamed to even have to include this. This is like having to ask UsefulNotes/McDonalds to [[CaptainObvious cook the burger before they serve it to you]], or having to remind your dentist not to videotape himself slapping you in the face with his penis while you're under. It's the sort of thing you'd feel ridiculous saying.\\
\\
Yet, [[WhoWouldBeStupidEnough here we are]], telling the game industry to please only sell us games'' that function.
-->-- '''Website/{{Cracked}}''', ''[[http://www.cracked.com/article_16196_the-7-commandments-all-video-games-should-obey.html The 7 Commandments All Video Games Should Obey]]''

->''Tiertex were infamous for releasing very bad ports of arcade games, and you'll never guess what - ''[[VideoGame/StreetFighterI Street Fighter]]'' was no exception. This is the UsefulNotes/AtariST version of ''Street Fighter''. Notice that the graphics have been redrawn and now look crap. Notice that it now jerks horribly. Notice that when Ryu does a flying kick, he hovers in the air for a fraction of a second for no discernible reason. Notice the horrible splodges that appear when a character is hit. Notice that I've deliberately left the sound off because there are no sound effects, just a really annoying tune playing the whole time. What you can't notice is that all the special moves have been left out; [[TakeOurWordForIt you'll just have to take my word for that]].''
-->--'''WebVideo/StuartAshen''', review of ''[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5zUkK14bHDk Human Killing Machine]]''

->''It's kind of like ''VideoGame/PacMan'', only with [[MostAnnoyingSound grating sound effects]], horrible visuals, clunky-arse gameplay, and a smaller map. So basically, it's... not ''Pac-Man''.''
-->-- '''[[WebVideo/PlanetDolan Danger Dolan]]''', [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-0yxVucGngo on]] the infamous UsefulNotes/Atari2600 port of ''VideoGame/PacMan''

----