Quotes: Nice Character, Mean Actor

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    Live-action TV 

Nicolas Cage: They probably think I'm the biggest jerk who's ever been on the show!
Lorne: (patting his back) No, no. That would be Steven Seagal.

This in turn supposedly almost got SNLer Al Franken beat up during an appearance on The Tonight Show, on which Seagal was also appearing. Jay Leno managed to distract the incensed Seagal and later crooned to Franken, 'I saved your ass!'
Jabootu on On Deadly Ground

    Newspapers 

I'm sorry, but I just don't really get Rosie O'Donnell. I've seen her in three or four movies now, and she has generally had the same effect on me as nails on a chalkboard. She's harsh and abrupt and staticco and doesn't seem to be having any fun. She looks mean.

    Stand-up Comedy 

"Who's the nicest celebrity you know?"
Adam Sandler!
"Who's the biggest jerk?"
Gary Busey!
Tom Wilson, "Biff's Question Song"

    Web Original 

It's always devastating to hear that someone you admire is a bit of a dick when the cameras stop rolling, and one report of monstrous behaviour can permanently sour you on work you've previously adored. For the same reason, I'm wary about talking to celebrities on Twitter, especially if they're of the "doesn't suffer fools" mold, lest I find cherished films or shows tainted, while trying to convince myself I caught them on a bad day. Self-described 'comedian' Alan Davies once found something vaguely negative I'd said about him by searching for his own name like a prick, and retweeted it before sending his thousands of followers after me; sniveling attack dogs with sausage fingers, all calling me a bully. When I told my mum about it, she never watched QI again.
Stuart Millard, Smoke and Mirrors & Steven Seagal

Here’s where the wheels begin to fall off. While the first two collaborations feature [Burt] Reynolds as a likable yet rough around the edges guy, here (as in the next three films we’ll examine) he’s just a moody, egotistical douche bag. I think that somewhere along the line for Reynolds, life began to imitate art.

It's almost as if Tom Baker has become so unbearable at this point the writers are instructed to keep him away from the other guest performers as long as possible (where he will inform them the script is ‘whippet shit’ whilst tossing it at their heads and make them question why they agreed to take part in the first place).

The obvious problem here is that William Shatner is not Leonard Nimoy. While nobody seems to have a bad word to say about Nimoy, it seems like a significant number of cast members from the original Star Trek hated Shatner. And it’s not too difficult to imagine why. Shatner tended to assert himself as the lead in the series, insisting that he should be the focus. He had a tendency to steal lines from his cast mates, or to insist that the director shoot his reaction to a colleague’s line-reading rather than delivery of the line itself...If Shatner had a tendency to do that as a member of the cast, it’s easy to see why it might have been a risky gambit to put him behind the camera and give him complete control of the film.

I'm just like anyone else my age: I watched The Cosby Show as a child (my parents held Cosby in such high esteem that it was the only prime time TV show we were allowed to stay up later to watch). I watched him doodle shit on an easel for kids. I listened to all of his standup tapes and committed many of them to memory. I felt bad for him when his son was murdered. He was one of the greatest standup comedians of all time and, objectively speaking, probably the finest storyteller of his generation. He was also a known autocrat (there's a reason The Cosby Show credits insisted on titling him "William H. Cosby, Jr. Ed.D.") and philanderer and alleged sex offender for many years. And I'm one of the many people who never bothered to notice it, maybe because I naturally just assumed it couldn't be true or simply because I wasn't paying enough attention.

But now we've all realized that Cosby is probably a serial rapist, and this is selfish… but I really wish he wasn't. I wish he had been one of those rare examples of stage persona merging deftly with real persona… the kind of shit we always fall for when it comes to famous people. I wish the real Cosby had lived up to the fictional Cosby's example.
Drew Magary, Make It Stop

On the show, Screech was the squeaky-voiced nerd and what some would consider the heart of the SBTB gang, despite being the butt of the occasional joke...Between every line of his book, it's clear that the truth is that Dustin Diamond didn't fit in with the rest of the cast because he was a bit younger and several bits douchier. Instead of owning up to this loneliness, he went around spreading baseless rumors about everyone being involved in drunken/stoned threesomes and later published them in a book with his old co-workers' photo hovering above his dick on the cover. For example, he frequently refers to Mark-Paul Gosselaar (Zack) as a "bitch" and calls Tiffani-Amber Thiessen (Kelly) a "set whore and Hollywood's pass-around girl." Interestingly, he never claims to have slept with her, but that's OK, because his huge penis has allegedly helped Diamond bang over 2,000 other women.

Roseanne Barr is weapons-grade nuts, and she has therefore started a cleaning operation of her website and reputation since looking weapons-grade nuts might look bad when you’ve decided to run for president.

While peddling his memoirs last year, Jason Priestley told a story about how during the Beverly Hills 90210 days he was on his way to a PR event with Shannen Doherty in a Town Car and he claims that she bitched at the publicist for not sending a limo to pick her up. We all pretty much dropped a fart on that story since we’ve only heard stories about how Shannen Doherty is as pleasant as a kitten kiss and is almost too easy to work with. Shannen said at the time that the story was a pile of shit-covered lies, because she hates limos! She thinks they’re trash and she doesn’t like them. Besides, she prefers to travel on the backs of the humans she makes her bitches.

    Real Life 

When he went to Columbia, I looked at the front page of the Calendar section of the Los Angeles Times, and he was quoted as saying, ‘Dustin Hoffman is the most malevolent person I’ve ever worked with.’ Being the intellectual that I am, I had to look the word up.
Dustin Hoffman on David Puttnam, producer of Ishtar

I struggled with letting in other people’s opinions. During Chicago Hope, I never let directors talk to me, because I was so spoiled. I started off with people like Milos Forman, Sidney Lumet, James Lapine, unbelievably gifted people. So there I was saying, ‘Don’t talk to me, I don’t want your opinion.’ I behaved abominably. I don’t care if my work was good or if I got an award for it. I’m not proud of how I was then, and it pained me.
Mandy Patinkin

We were in rehearsals for Executive Decision. I’m playing his Master Sargeant, and we come in for rehearsals and he says, ‘I’m in command. Everything I say is law. Anybody doesn’t agree?’ I was like, ‘Bwahahaha.’ I started cracking up because he sounded like a retard … He came up and he Taekwondo’ed my ass against the brick wall... He’s six-foot-five and he caught me off guard and knocked all of the air out of me and I was like, ‘Why?! Why?!’ I really wanted to say how big and fat he was and that he runs like a girl, but I didn’t because all I could say was, ‘Why?!’ Why’d he slam me against the wall? We were rehearsing.
John Leguizamo on Steven Seagal

I never did get even with Al Jolson. In Hollywood, in 1947, I was playing a small club called Billy Gray's, and Al Jolson came in one night and sat through my whole performance with his back to me. (When The Jolson Story came out in the movies, there was a big sign on Sunset Boulevard that bragged, 'Jolson's Back!'' 'Right,' I said to Jeanette. 'I remember it very well.')
Alan King, Name Dropping

Sarah Jessica Parker smokes all the time, and I would never would smoke. And she didn't contact me—she's playing my life, and she didn't bother to do any research...'I just got done telling everyone how I'm playing the worst actress in the history of film!' That wasn't nice. She didn't know me.
Dolores Fuller on Ed Wood

The worst diva moments I ever had, without a doubt — two shows that are neither Buffy nor Star Trek — I hated the ladies on Charmed. (And there's a reason why they were cast as witches.)
Armin Shimerman on his favorite guest appearance

Chevy mostly pissed me off when I was working on Conan back around '94. I had been working hard all week on a very complex desk piece. It played the segment right before Chevy came out and it did okay. After Chevy was introduced, he sat down, and the first thing he said was, 'Wow, Conan, that sure was stupid.' ...I get along with Chevy because I barely work with him and don't have him constantly ruining whole days when I'm there, like he does with the regular cast members. I view him now as a confused old man who can't really hurt me in any way. I understand why the regulars on Community and the full time writers hating him. If he wasted my time as much as much as he wasted their time, I'd hate him, too.
Dino Stamatopoulos