Quotes / My God, You Are Serious!

”This is worse than I thought. This isn’t as simple as pretend or play acting Eddy. Ed actually believes he’s become a monster!”

Edd, Ed, Edd n Eddy, “The Day the Ed Stood Still”

Damian: I didn't make anything up. I could've had a doctorate in geology at seven years old.
Jon: And why didn't you?
Damian: Because my mother killed my professor and dumped him in the ocean.
Jon: Ha! Yeah right.
Damian: ...

— Super Sons #1

Peter Parker: Could you pay me in advance?
J. Jonah Jameson: [laughs like a maniac for 10 seconds] You serious? Pay you for what, standing there!? The planetarium, tomorrow night, 8 o'clock! There's the door!

— Spider-Man 2

Arthur Fleck: It's been a rough few weeks, Murray. Ever since I... killed those three Wall Street guys!
Murray Franklin: [Beat] Okay, I'm waiting for the punchline?
Arthur: There is no punchline. It's not a joke.
[Show executive frantically begins gesturing for a cut in the background]
Murray: ...You're serious, aren't you, you're telling us you killed those three young men on the subway?

— Joker (2019)

von Karma: Perhaps you'd like to cross-examine the parrot for a little comic relief, hmm?
Phoenix: (Yeah yeah, very funny. You're a sore loser, von Karma...wait a minute..."Cross-examine the parrot?")
Maya: Wh-what is it, Nick? ...No, you're not going to...?!
Phoenix: Your Honor! The defense would like to take von Karma up on his proposal!
Judge: Take Mr. von Karma up?
von Karma: On his...proposal?
Phoenix: Exactly, Your Honor! I would like to cross-examine the witness's pet parrot!

— Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney

"Oh, dear girl, I'm sorry! I assumed you were speaking figuratively!"

— Benoit Blanc after he finds out that lying literally makes Marta puke, Knives Out

"Well, then, what are we going to do? Ask [Dark-Lyn] to (mockingly) "Please, stop destroying the universe"?" (Prince Adam smirks and crosses his arms) "Oh, my god, we are."

— Skeletor, Masters of the Universe: Revelation.

Raph: Mutation? You mean like us? (gasp) Could we be-?

Mikey: Part imitation crab?!

Donnie: Ha ha! ...You are not kidding, are you?

—Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, "Mystic Mayhem"

Eddington: What are you really up to, Javert? Do you expect me to believe that a decorated Starfleet officer, the pride of the Federation, is going to poison an entire planet?
Sisko: That's exactly what I plan to do.
Eddington: (Beat) You're bluffing!
Sisko: Am I? Commander, launch torpedoes.
(Stunned Silence from everyone, including Eddington and the crew of the Defiant)
Sisko: (turns emphatically to Worf) Commander, I said launch torpedoes!

—Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, "For the Uniform"

Adam: I think I know how to stop Evil-Lyn. But it starts with us going to Grayskull.
Skeletor: Well then, what are we going to do? Ask her nicely to "please stop destroying the universe"?
[Beat; Adam just smirks at Skeletor]
Skeletor: Oh my god, we are.

— Masters of the Universe: Revelation

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