Quotes / Fake Interactivity

"It's like the audience participation at the Christmas Panto. We all know damn well the forthcoming events will not change whether we yell 'He's behind you!' or not! But you're going to hold everything up until we say it, aren't you, you fucking cross-dressing bitch?!"
Yahtzee Croshaw, Zero Punctuation

"I flip to this channel to find: no sound, no movement, just a cartoon Latino girl and her monkey staring at me hungrily/happily. It was one of those moments of truth, as if god was trying to tell me something. The moment seemed to go on forever, surreally self-reflective. I realized that I do need to enjoy the silence, to look at myself instead of watching all these movies. Reality was indeed outside the television. Then the monkey said: THAT'S RIGHT! The answer is Three! Now, can you see where Conchita's shoes are? So, with a sigh of relief, I learned nothing and spent the next hour or so watching [adult swim]. :)"
Jared von Hindman, Head Injury Theater

"We've got to tell the bird to put the egg down! Say, 'Put it down!' Again! Now flap your wings while you do it! Flap your wings and yell! Don't question it, just do it!"
Maraka, Saturday Night Live, "TV Funhouse"