"There won't be humans in 500 years. Enough people choke themselves when they jerk off we gave it a name. We ain't a species made to last."
"Ah, there's nothin' like a little... stranglin' to get the blood flowin', am I right?"
— Klaus Hargreeves, fresh from being garroted by his torturers, The Umbrella Academy (2019), "Man On The Moon"
"Hey look, when you die via auto-erotic asphyxiation, people are gonna be talking about that shit for years to come. You'll just have to deal with it."
— Rich Evans on David Carradine, Best of the Worst
"Many cultural critics believe that humanity's last truly creative act was Michael Hutchence's 1997 wank-hanging, which took even the artist himself by surprise."
Cheryl: You seriously don't think that's hot?
Pam: I seriously think you're scary.
Cheryl: No, no no no... like, a big sweaty fireman carries you out of a burning building, lays you on the sidewalk, and you think, "Yeah, okay, he's gonna give me mouth to mouth." But instead, he just starts choking the shit out of you, and the last sensation that you feel before you die is him just squeezing your throat so hard that a big, wet blob of drool drips off his teeth and just - blurp! - falls right onto your popped out eyeball.
Pam: ...Jesus Christ.
Cheryl: I know, right?
Lana: What the hell?
Cheryl: I'm wet just thinking about it.
— Archer, "Honeypot"
