Quotes / Eats Babies

Someone ate the baby it's rather sad to say
Someone ate the baby so she won't be out to play
We'll never hear her whiny cry
or have to feel if she is dry
We'll never hear her asking, "Why, why, why?"
Someone ate the baby.

Someone ate the baby it's absolutely clear
Someone ate the baby 'cause the baby isn't here
We'll give away her toys and clothes
We'll never have to wipe her nose
Dad says, "That's the way it goes."
Someone ate the baby.

Someone ate the baby, what a frightful thing to eat
Someone ate the baby, though she wasn't very sweet
It was a heartless thing to do
The policemen haven't got a clue
I simply can't imagine who would go and (burp) eat the baby.
Shel Silverstein: "Dreadful"

"Hi! I'm Crazy Eddie. Oooha, oooha. I put babies on spikes. Do you want a rack of babies? We've got babies on racks. Hmmm, they...taste of chicken!"
Eddie Izzard, Dressed to Kill

"Well, maybe if you didn't make your babies so delicious, Dracula wouldn't have to eat 'em!"

"Babies are what the mother eats"
The Times-Herald, 7 November 1984

"I will eat your babies, bitch!"
"Sweet" Dee Reynolds, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Baldrick: He still wants to see you, my lord.
Edmund: Did you mention the [baby-eating] Bishop of Bath and Wells?
Baldrick: Yes, my lord.
Edmund: And what did he say?
The Baby-Eating Bishop of Bath and Wells: He said, "I AM the baby-eating Bishop of Bath and Wells!"
Edmund: Good Lord!
Bishop: You haven't any children, have you Blackadder?
Edmund: No, no, I'm not married.
Bishop: In that case I'll skip breakfast and get straight to business.
Blackadder II, Money.

"I like children - fried."
"There's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender."

"Tender but sticky."

"I needed to lose some baby weight. Caused by the baby I ate."
Richard, Looking for Group

Cale: (learning to walk after having his legs reattached) I can't take another step!
Richard: I can't not eat this baby!

Olaf the Troll: Barmaid! Bring me stronger ale and some plump, succulent babies to eat! (later, to Spike and Xander) You there! Do you know where there are babies?
Spike: (casually, to Xander) What d'you think, the hospital?
Xander: What? Shut up.

"Did you just eat the BABY!"

"Just think; right now, Jeb Bush is somewhere eating a live puppy."
Stewie Griffin, Family Guy

Schlock: Are we still the good guys if I accidentally eat a couple of those baby kreelies in the heat of battle?
Elf: Your special forces squad does not need a lieutenant. It needs the reverend.

Eat up: the sushi's made from fresh orphans.
Dick Roman, Supernatural

"You eat babies! You have to! To survive! Everyone knows that!"
John Marston to a sasquatch in Red Dead Redemption: Undead Nightmare

"Baby! The other 'other white meat'!"

With the sound of ripping skin and crying mothers, the shroud between lands tore open, and the White Widow slipped out. Her girlish faith had long since eroded away, but in that moment she knew that God had a sense of irony. Why else would the dead spit her out into a birthing ward? Why else would the fresh-born blood of babes be laid out to sate her hunger? Her skin, ash-white and wrinkled from the rigors of walking among the shades, flushed for a sweet second as the hot vitae of the first infant passed her lips. The screaming of children, mothers, nurses and others was like sweet music to her dry, cracked ears. But the hunger never ended.
Vampire: The Masquerade - Mexico City By Night

The most valuable commodity is another Kindred, immobilized with a stake through the heart and ready for diablerie. A Cainite is a bulky thing to lug about, but some enterprising and ruthless Kindred find a more convenient form: an Embraced and staked child - or even a toddler - which immediately becomes known as the "baby on a stick."