Quotes / China Takes Over the World

"There [in China] lies a sleeping giant. Let him sleep!
For when he wakes, he will astonish the world."

— Napoléon Bonaparte (in 1803)

Under my guidance, Love Media has emerged as the fastest growing US-run media conglomerate of the past five years... our new satellite in China is something all Americans can be proud of.

—Donald Love radio advert, Grand Theft Auto III

This drawing has been sent in by Robert, age 9. That's a shit drawing, Robert. There are children your age in China who can make shoes.

—Frankie Boyle, Mock the Week, Unlikely things to hear on a children's TV program

The real problem of the Far East is not that so many of them are communists, but simply that there are so many of them.

—Robert A. Heinlein

China is feeling its oats and crunching its numbers and seems to have decided it would be better off as the overlord of a rising Asia than the underling of a dying West.

—Christopher Loring Knowles, "A Very Sirius Election — Pretending The Wars Are Done"

'So is America over? A long time ago we 'lost' China, we've lost Southeast Asia, we've lost South America. Maybe we'll lose the Middle East and North African countries. Is America over? It's a kind of paranoia, but it's the paranoia of the superrich and superpowerful. If you don't have everything, it's a disaster.

—Noam Chomsky, Power Systems

It seems when the film was originally shot (way back in 2009), the enemy was China, a far more suitable choice. But in an amusing turn of events, the film’s backers got worried about offending Chinese moviegoers and made the switch to North Korea, which involved overdubbing dialogue and using CGI to replace all the Chinese flags with North Korean flags. Which just goes to show where American movies make most of their money these days.

—The Agony Booth on Red Dawn (2012)

No one lives in Manhattan anymore because the Chinese use all the available real estate for money laundering.

—Drew Magary

In American movies, heroes overcome adversity through love or spirit. In China, it's perfectly reasonable for the protagonist to kill his problems with industrial grain alcohol. That's good news, USA — it means that when the Chinese finally do invade us, that's only going to make this great nation more American.

—Seanbaby, "The 6 Most Needlessly Dangerous Jackie Chan Stunts"

General-Secretary Brezhnev and President Reagan sit at a table, having tea.
Brezhnev asks, "So you see where this policy of arms race landed you, Mr. Reagan?"
"Do you see where you have got with this idea of disarmament, Mr. Brezhnev?", Reagan snaps back.
Then they hear the voice of Deng Xiaoping from behind the door: "Okay, the tea break is over. Back to work, comrades!"

— A close retelling of a popular Soviet joke of the 1980s

Gohan: I'm learning Chinese.
Vegeta: Why are you learning Chinese?
Gohan: 30年后，您就会知道。^note "In thirty years, you'll know."

— Dragon ShortZ, "DTF"

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