Quotes / Based on a Great Big Lie

"The following story is a big fat lie. No names have been changed to protect anybody!"
— The intro of the Woody Woodpecker cartoon "Under The Counter-Spy"

"[P]lease ignore any tiresome scolds who complain that the movie is not really based on fact. Duh."
Roger Ebert, from a review of Hidalgo

"Hey there, boys and girls! This here's a true story we just made up."
Stinky Wizzleteats, The Ren & Stimpy Show, "Son of Stimpy"

"Tentatively titled The Conjuring, it's the 'true' story of a haunting at a New England farmhouse — though presumably it's 'true' in the contemporary sense of the word, meaning that it didn't happen but it says it did on the poster."
The A.V. Club on The Conjuring

"The Amityville Horror is [based on a true story]... (chuckle) yeah, more like based on a true hoax!"

Journalist Scott Templeton: It's in my notes, Gus. Everything that happened, everything that guy said when I got to him. Every last word is in my notes. [flings down notepad]
Alma Gutierrez: It's empty.
Gus Haynes: What's empty?
Alma: The pad he waved at you, saying it was all filled with notes. It's empty. Every page.
The Wire, "-30-"