->''"Vulcans do not make small talk."''
-->--'''Tuvok''', ''Series/StarTrekVoyager''

Wiki/TheOtherWiki defines small talk, or phatic communication, as "Conversation for its own sake", versus conversation to transmit useful information. In many societies it serves as a useful social function, but this guy doesn't enjoy taking part in it.

Maybe he's TheQuietOne or the AloofAlly, maybe he has [[{{Determinator}} a laser focus on a single goal]], maybe he's completely stressed out, or maybe he's {{German|icEfficiency}}. Whatever the case, he'd rather talk about something meaningful or nothing at all, than TalkAboutTheWeather. Also commonly comes up with people who have an AmbiguousDisorder, {{Emotionless Girl}}s, SugarAndIcePersonality, and, well, anything to do with {{introversion|Tropes}}.

TruthInTelevision for many people.

Sister trope of DispenseWithThePleasantries. Compare BeingPersonalIsntProfessional, which may be one justification, or NoSocialSkills, which may be another.



* Literature/AnitaBlake repeatedly mentions how little she likes small talk, and how much she appreciates those characters who don't indulge in it either, like Dolph and Edward.
* ''Literature/AFrozenHeart'': In this tie-in novel to ''Disney/{{Frozen}}'', [[spoiler:Prince Hans' father, the King of the Southern Isles, hated idle banter and oftentimes got annoyed at Hans' attempts to make conversation with him, frequently rebuking him for not "getting straight to the point" any time he deemed his youngest son had overstayed too long in his presence and ordered him to get out. It's done deliberately by the king so he can focus on more important things than Hans pointlessly ranting about his brothers bullying him, and so, he contemptuously dismissed Hans as a weakling for not fighting back.]]
* ''Literature/{{RCN}}'': [[BadassBookworm Adlele Mundy]] has no patience for conversation that does not convey data, and prefers to get her data electronically without any conversation at all.
* One of the ''many'' interpretations and theories around Anton Chigurh from ''Literature/NoCountryForOldMen'' is that he despises small talk because it's, essentially, purposeless. In one scene of the book and film, he bullies and almost kills a man for trying to make conversation with him, only stopping because he won a coin toss.
* ''TabletopGame/MagicTheGathering'': ''Literature/TestOfMetal'' contains this exchange:
-->His voice faded to a gurgle as the dragon leaned on his chest hard enough to spring a couple of his ribs. "Banter," said Nicol Bolas, "gets on my nerves."
* Aya of ''Literature/TanteiTeamKZJikenNote'' hates small talk and couldn't do it either. This is the reason for her FriendlessBackground.
* One of the reasons the characters Hettar and Eriond get along well in ''Literature/TheBelgariad'' is their mutual lack of need to fill gaps of silence while travelling together with random conversation. They don't hate small talk per se but neither see the point of it.
* In ''Literature/{{Blindsight}}'' an alien civilization cannot comprehend the concept of communication that isn't intended to transmit useful data, [[spoiler: technically they're not even sentient, and they assume sentience is a disease and attempt to "contain" it.]]
* Played with in ''Literature/HoratioHornblower''. Hornblower, though shy, is inclined to be chatty to the point he doesn't trust himself to allow himself ''any'' unnecessary conversation with his officers. Instead he maintains a strict reserve and generally confines his remarks to an ambiguous "[[CatchPhrase Ha, h'm]]," which certainly gives him the reputation for hating small talk.

* Sheldon from ''Series/TheBigBangTheory''. It's not that he hates small talk; it's that ''his'' idea of small talk consists of advanced physics theory, comic book and ''Franchise/StarTrek'' canon, and obscure factoids he finds fascinating (even if no one else does). Things such as gossip, sports or personal relationships, he couldn't care less about.
* From the ''Franchise/StarTrek'' franchise:
** Both Worf and Odo hate small talk. Inevitably this leads to a conversation in ''Series/StarTrekDeepSpaceNine'' where they make small talk...about how they hate small talk.
** In ''Series/StarTrekTheNextGeneration'', Captain Picard is not a big fan of small talk. In fact, when Data attempted to make small talk with him, he directed the android to keep an eye on someone who was notorious for being big on small talk. Data follows that order and the rest of the crew look in amazement as the resulting conversation rapidly shrinks to microscopic proportions.
--->'''Riker:''' I have to admit, it has a sort of strange fascination. How long can two people talk about ''nothing?''
** In ''Series/StarTrekVoyager'', Tuvok once remarked that "Vulcans do not make small talk." However, under orders, he does briefly make small talk with a hologram of Creator/LeonardoDaVinci in "Concerning Flight".
** Similarly, on ''Voyager'', when Captain Janeway first activated The Doctor and commented on his lack of personality, he stated that he was programmed to perform medicine as efficiently as possible and small talk would only compromise his performance. Later, however, as part of his growth to exceed his programming, he learned the art of small talk in order to better relate to his patients, and tried to teach it to Seven of Nine, a former Borg drone, as well.
** In the Voyager episode "Someone to Watch Over Me", [[PygmalionPlot The Doctor tries to teach Seven of Nine about romance and dating]], with this exchange occuring:
-->'''The Doctor:''' Ah. Tell me about your tastes, your likes and dislikes.
-->'''Seven:''' I dislike irrelevant conversations.
* The "Vocational Guidance Counsellor" sketch from ''Series/MontyPythonsFlyingCircus'' has this exchange between Palin and Cleese (no prizes for guessing who plays what):
-->'''Counsellor''': Ah, Mr Anchovy! Do sit down. \\
'''Mr Anchovy''': Thank you. Take the weight off the feet, eh? Lovely weather for the time of year I must say! \\
'''Counsellor''': Enough of this gay banter.
* ''Series/GameOfThrones'':
** Both Cersei Lannister and Lyanna Mormont get extremely annoyed at folks who don't get to the point. Lyanna quickly shuts down the admittedly poor attempts at small talk and flattery during her meeting with Sansa and Jon. Even her initial greeting ends so abruptly that it catches her guests unaware.
--> '''Lyanna:''' I think we've had enough small talk. Why are you here?
** When being welcomed back to King's Landing by the Queen Regent, Gregor Clegane doesn't bother with chit-chat and plainly asks who he gets to kill this time.
* In the crime-lab show ''Series/{{Bones}}'', one of the regularly-repeating crew of interns is constantly frustrated by the amount of time the main characters spend discussing their personal lives and dramas, so much so that "can we talk about the job, please" is basically his CatchPhrase. [[RuleOfFunny Of course]], on the rare occasions when ''he'' talks about his personal life, everyone else [[HypocriticalHumor expresses shock at how unprofessional he's being.]]
* From ''Series/SabrinaTheTeenageWitch'' where she meets Aaron's parents:
-->'''Sabrina:''' Hi, Aaron's told me so much about you.\\
'''Aaron's Dad:''' Then he obviously didn't tell you I hate small talk.
* Sam Puckett from ''Series/{{iCarly}}'', especially when it comes to guys and dating. She'd rather they not talk to her and pay for dinner... or even just give her the money and stay out of her life.
* Mitchell from ''Series/ModernFamily'' hates making small talk with strangers. In one episode, this is his justification for not attending a wedding with his partner Cam.
* Detective Murdoch from ''Series/MurdochMysteries'' is a downplayed example, as he doesn't especially despise it, but he prefers useful conversation or talking about science.
-->'''Brackenreid:''' So Murdoch, how's married life treating you? All well at the hotel?\\
'''Murdoch:''' I'm happy to report that it's an excellent arrangement. No one pays you any particular mind.\\
'''Brackenreid:''' What do you mean?\\
'''Murdoch:''' Well, sir, at my boarding house, the other residents... I was constantly being pulled into conversations of limited merit.\\
'''Brackenreid:''' I can only imagine the difficulty.\\
'''Murdoch:''' [[SarcasmBlind Thank you]].
* Veronica from ''Series/BetterOffTed''.
-->'''Veronica:''' How are you?\\
'''Ted:''' I'm fine. Why?\\
'''Veronica:''' I was just seeing what small talk might look like.\\
'''Ted:''' Oh, well, usually, you...\\
'''Veronica:''' Please stop. I feel like I just pissed away my day.
* Jess from ''Series/GilmoreGirls'' hates small talk mostly because he'd rather be in a quiet corner somewhere reading and because everyone in Stars Hollow likes to be in each other's business. This is apparently a negative with some folks, especially Lorelai.
* [[TheStoic Captain Holt]] and [[AloofDarkHairedGirl Rosa Diaz]] in ''Series/BrooklynNineNine'' (and in Rosa's case, it's not just small talk but revealing any details about her life whatsoever).
-->'''Rosa:''' We only have to fill eight minutes.\\
'''Holt:''' Sure, but think about it as 480 seconds and you'll see why I'm concerned.\\
'''Rosa:''' Oh, my God.
* Kilgrave in ''Series/JessicaJones2015''. He looks like he'd rather pass a kidney stone than try to have a conversation without [[MindRape his powers.]]
-->'''Kilgrave:''' I've always been bad at small talk. I'm used to just [[CompellingVoice saying things and they happen.]] ''(chuckles)'' Spoils you.\\
'''Lin:''' Well, what a burden.\\
'''Kilgrave:''' You have no idea.
* Series/{{NCIS}} Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs. [[TheLancer Tony [=DiNozzo=]]] describes him as a "functional mute".
* Over the years, Series/JudgeJudy has had quite a few litigants try to ingratiate themselves to her with bits of friendly conversation, and she's made it clear this cuts zero ice with her.
--> Defendant ''[Grinning]'': "How are you doing this morning?"
--> JJ ''[Curtly]'': "I'm doing fine. Let's get down to business."

* "Small Talk" by {{Music/Genesis}}:
-->Going round in circles, hearing too many points of view\\
Just words to tire me out, small talk I could do without\\
I would be amazed if you returned to see things my way\\
Now that you've been disrespectful to my sense of pride
* The song "Everybody But Me" by Music/LykkeLi covers this pretty well.
* Music/ImogenHeap's "First Train Home" is [[WordOfGod allegedly]] about something like this happening at a party.
* Music/ScrittiPolitti's "Small Talk":
-->I heard a whisper\\
That careless talk costs more than you bargained for
* Music/{{Supertramp}}'s "Casual Conversations".

* In ''Theatre/ThePajamaGame'' there's a song called [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n0cJKzYyYy8 "Small Talk"]]
-->I don't want to talk small talk\\
Now that I'm alone with you\\
I don't want to talk small talk\\\
We've got bigger things to do\\
Let's not talk of the weather\\
Or the fashions for the fall\\
Why don't you stop all this small talk?\\
I've got something better for your lips to do\\
And that takes no talk at all

[[folder:Tabletop Games]]
* Dragon planeswalker and part-time BigBad Nicol Bolas from ''TabletopGame/MagicTheGathering'' finds banter irritating. Since Bolas's typical ways of expressing said irritation start at "broken ribs" and move up to "complete destruction of your entire family line" it's probably best not to try his patience.

[[folder:Video Games]]
* ''VideoGame/DragonAgeOrigins'':
** Sten. It's almost expected, considering he's a ProudWarriorRaceGuy.
--->'''Alistair''': You know, you can try to talk more.\\
'''Sten''': You mean I should remark upon the weather before I cut someone's head off?\\
'''Alistair''': Uhh... never mind.
** Another example, when the player is asking questions...
--->'''Grey Warden''': Tell me about the Qunari. \\
'''Sten''': No. \\
'''Grey Warden''': Well that's not what I expected to hear.
** The sequel confirms this applies to Qunari soldiers in general, either out of stoicism or discomfort with a foreign language. They can be extremely eloquent when discussing philosophy, but have no concept of talk for its own sake. The Arishok has little to say but "begone" to anyone besides [[WorthyOpponent Hawke]].
** Averted, however, with Iron Bull in ''VideoGame/DragonAgeInquisition'', despite him also being Qunari - possibly because he's a spy/secret policeman, rather than a soldier. Far from the taciturn and [[TheStoic stoic]] Sten or the Arishok, Bull would talk under wet cement, leading to him being an endless font of party banter.
* David King, the plumber in the ''VideoGame/ResidentEvilOutbreak'' games. [[spoiler:His strong aversion to small talk lessens in his ending in ''File # 2''.]]
* [[TheQuietOne Timur]], [[BigBad Ray Bulgarin's]] buddy/lackey from ''VideoGame/GrandTheftAutoIVTheBalladOfGayTony'' ''really'' hates small talk, and considers Luis' insistence in engaging in it with him as a sign of insincerity. He's also a total {{Jerkass}} to boot:
-->'''Luis:''' So?\\
'''Timur:''' So fucking what?\\
'''Luis:''' So, what's up with you, bro?\\
'''Timur:''' Fuck off.
* Mare from ''VideoGame/RPGShooterStarwish''. Mare initially appears to be TheVoiceless, answering all your attempts to strike up a conversation with an ellipsis. When finally starting to talk, Mare [[TheQuietOne still doesn't say much]], because "You never said anything important." And yes, those occasions when Mare ''is'' willing to talk, is when you bring up ''important'' stuff, like 'the continued survival of Life, the Universe and Everything', more or less.
* Squall Leonhart from ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyVIII''. When badgered by his companions to speak you can visually see his whole body sigh before he stands upright to make as short a statement as possible. He makes prolific use of the "..." VisibleSilence and seems to have a ready stock of responses to deter people from making small talk with him.
-->'''Quistis:''' Talk to me. Tell me what's on your mind.\\
'''Squall:''' Whatever.\\
'''Quistis:''' ''[mocking]'' Whatever. ''[laughs]''\\
'''Squall:''' ''[facepalm]''
* In ''VideoGame/{{Bayonetta}}'', the titular protagonist has no time for the constant, winding chatter of the AffablyEvil archangels. Her responses to their enigmatic prattle and over-formality is invariably some mixture of [[MsFanservice innuendo]], [[DeadpanSnarker snark]], and/or [[TalkToTheFist gunfire]].
* Both Rinkah and Beruka from ''VideoGame/FireEmblemFates'' firmly believe in this trope. In Rinkah's case, it's because of [[ProudWarriorRaceGuy a rule of her tribe]], while Beruka is this way due to being an EmotionlessGirl.
* ''VideoGame/ShiningForce: Resurrection of the Dark Dragon'' added some mild characterization by allowing you to get to know your Force members by speaking to them in headquarters. Zylo the werewolf absolutely ''abhors'' this, though, and every conversation with him is either VisibleSilence or him (re)stating that his favorite color is black.
* [[AntiHero Shadow]] from ''Franchise/SonicTheHedgehog''. Due to being an aloof and standoffish individual who is always focused on a mission, he isn't a fan of small talk. For example, in ''VideoGame/SonicTheHedgehog2006'', Rouge asks Shadow if he wants to know the object she's holding which is the Scepter of Darkness. Shadow tells her that G.U.N. sent him to rescue her and nothing else. Rouge then comments on how he's always business.
* In ''VideoGame/FairyFencerF'', Ryushin, a fairy with a robot-like appearance and mannerisms, really doesn't see the point of talking unless he has important information to relate and is slow to warm up to [[spoiler:Eryn's attempts to get him to talk in the Vile God route in the ''Advent Dark Force'' remake.]]
* Solid Snake mentions in ''VideoGame/MetalGearSolid'' that he and his old partner Gray Fox never spoke about anything personal, preferring to discuss such things as rations and rifle clips. He comments that it was "sort of an unwritten rule."

* Used in ''Webcomic/{{Weregeek}}'' [[http://www.weregeek.com/2015/07/08/ during a LARP]]. "Cragg hate small talk."

* [[Website/TheBestPageInTheUniverse Maddox]] wishes he could kick people who make small talk [[GroinAttack in the crotch]]. [[http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=smalltalk Seriously]].
* Matt Walsh, the conservative blogger, has mentioned in several of his posts and podcasts his hatred of small talk.
-->'''Walsh:''' [[http://themattwalshblog.com/2013/09/11/im-an-introvert-and-i-dont-need-to-come-out-of-my-shell I hate small talk. I hate it with a blinding passion. Small talk exists simply to cannibalize silence (...)]]
* The awkward, filled-with-this date WebVideo/TheNostalgiaCritic has with the WebVideo/TheNostalgiaChick drove him to breaking point.
* Bitch of ''Literature/{{Worm}}'' isn't fond of conversation in general, and particularly dislikes small talk.
* In Volume 1, Chapter 3 of ''WebAnimation/{{RWBY}}'', Blake Belladonna is clearly agitated when [[SociallyAwkwardHero Ruby]] and [[CoolBigSis Yang]] attempt to start a conversation with her. Only when Ruby asks Blake about the book she's reading does Blake seem interested in talking to her.

* In ''WesternAnimation/TheVentureBrothers'' episode with the MrAltDisney character Mr. Brisbee, Brock at first tries to get along with Brisbee's bodyguard, but the other is completely silent and rude. Later on Brock is bored and tries to light a cigarette but can't, at which point the other bodyguard produces a lighter, prompting Brock to say "You're all right." Of course, it was all a trick to knock him out.
* Lemongrab of ''WesternAnimation/AdventureTime'' tends to be like this, thanks to his almost total lack of social skills. He prefers sending people to the dungeon without a peep to actually discussing problems.
* Garnet from ''WesternAnimation/StevenUniverse'' normally responds to small talk by glaring silently until they go away.

* “small talk comes from small bones” ― Ezra Pound
* This is why [[UsefulNotes/MyersBriggs introverts]] are perceived as not being very talkative by so many, in fact. They don't like making small talk, but if they're asked about a subject they enjoy talking about, it may be difficult to get them to shut up.
* Phil Hill, the first American to win a UsefulNotes/FormulaOne championship has been described as being uneasy making small talk, but welcoming of a serious discussion on any topic.
* Steve Wozniak, one of the fathers of the modern computer, also hates small talk, which he has said is part of what made him so interested in computers. If he wasn't so asocial he wouldn't have become so interested in electronics in the first place.
* In the Finnish language, the closest thing there is to a expression for "small talk" can also be roughly translated to "grinding shit." The implication is that you are moving your mouth, but you are not doing anything useful with it.
* Hungarian also doesn't have a direct translation, the closest expressions used for it can also mean "chit-chat", "gossip", "tattling" or "empty-talk". Stereotypically done by almost only women: secretaries, government-employees and old ladies.
* The prevalence of small talk does appear to vary with culture. [[http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-13545386 Reportedly]], the British find Germans rude for not using small talk, while Germans consider small talk to be dishonest and don't have a native word for the concept in their language.
* The situation gets very interesting if you visit places outside of your usual area of residence, like old traditional country villages, where you may find people talking about what you would typically perceive as a small talk topic seriously. This is relatively common in the case of discussing the weather, which is in fact very important to growing and cultivating crops.