[[quoteright:350:[[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Big_Bertha_%28howitzer%29 http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/big-bertha350_1102.jpg]]]]
[[caption-width-right:350:"Big Bertha" in action.]]

Military people, [[TruthInTelevision real]] or fictional, have a macabre (and often hilarious) tendency to give cutesy nicknames to some truly nasty and often lethal hardware. This trope does for weapons what FluffyTheTerrible and {{Fluffy Tamer}}s do for the animal kingdom, with possibly a little bit of overlap with ICallItVera.

* L'Arc-en-ciel is French for Rainbow. It is also the name of the Asura's WaveMotionGun in the ''MagicalGirlLyricalNanohaAs''.
* ''GunslingerGirl''. Cyborg ChildSoldier Triela does hand-to-hand combat with the Italian GIS special forces, who dub her Lepretto (roughly "bunny") after a child's doll that shares her TwinTails.
* ''Anime/TurnAGundam'' has a deceptively poetic name (and thematic design) for its apocalyptic weapons system. [[spoiler:The Moonlight Butterfly.]]

* ''Film/MenInBlack'''s Noisy Cricket, which doesn't look very nasty until it's fired.
* ''Film/SherlockHolmesAGameOfShadows'': When Moriarty's troops can't hit Holmes, Watson, and Sim with their regular guns and mortars, they pull out the absurdly large cannon named Little Hansel.
* ''Film/{{Hellboy}}'' and [[{{BFG}} Big Baby.]]
* In ''OpenSeason'', [=McSqueezy=] blows up a hunter's truck with a bomb improvised from a propane tank. He calls it Mr. Happy.
* ''Film/{{Predator}}'' has [[JesseVentura Blain]]'s [[GatlingGood Minigun]], "Old Painless."

* ''EndersGame'': I give you the Molecular Detachment Device, capable quite literally of destroying whole planets. Also known as the Little Doctor or Doctor Device, for M.D. Device.

[[AC: LiveActionTV]]
* Creator/StephenColbert has his handgun, which he calls "Sweetness".

* The "Broken Butterfly" magnum and "Matilda" automatic handgun in ''VideoGame/ResidentEvil4.''
* ''DevilMayCry 3'''s "Kalina Ann" rocket launcher, used by Lady. She specifically named it after her mother, who was [[spoiler:killed by her father Arkham for a demonic ritual of some sort]].
* The "Tiny Bee" pistols used by Gunners in ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyX2.''
* From ''VideoGame/TeamFortress2'', Heavy's Sasha and Natascha, which are two mini-guns. Though it's averted with his other big guns: the [[UsefulNotes/TheAmericanCivilWar Brass Beast]], the [[VideoGame/PokerNightAtTheInventory Iron Curtain]], and the [[DamnItFeelsGoodToBeAGangster Tomislav]].
* ''MetalSlug'' features several combat vehicles with silly names. Among them are a spiked tank called "Melty Honey", a camouflaged tank known as "Bull Chan", and of course, the titular "Metal Slug" tank.

* The TropeNamer is, of course, the "Bouncing Betty". On the off chance there's actually someone here who doesn't know what a Bouncing Betty is, [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/S-mine this article]] at TheOtherWiki should bring you up to speed...
** Finnish name for that contraption is ''Hyppy-Heikki'' (Hopping Henry).
** Swedish servicemen famously call a similar contraption "Lille Skutt" ("little hop") after a cute cartoon rabbit from ''Bamse''...
*** Heck, ''Bamse'' itself is an anti-air missile. Considering the very explicit pacifism of both the character and the author of the comic, you can understand why Rune A. was not amused.
*** Even leaving aside the character, ''bamse'' was and still is a cutesy adjective (for large).
* The Germans had a knack for this in both World Wars.
** Various artillery pieces were known as "Big Bertha" (German ''Dicke Bertha'', literally "thick (fat) Bertha"). The most famous was perhaps the railway gun, shown at the top of this page.
** A longer-barreled but smaller-bored (relatively speaking) railway gun on the same type of mounting as the "Big Bertha" was known as ''Schlanke Emma'' ("Slender Emma").
** And the most famous (or most bizarre, depending on your point of view) German artillery piece of World War One, the ''Paris Gun'' that shelled the French capital from a range of over 70 miles (110 kilometers), was according to Ian Hogg nicknamed "Die Parisien" by its crew--which as he points out translates into French as ''La Parisienne''.[[note]]A reading in English as "Die, Parisians" would be incorrect. Apt, but incorrect.[[/note]]
** Yet another [[UpToEleven absurdly-huge]] German gun was called Dora.
** The 180-ton ''Panzerkampfwagen'' VII was known as the ''Maus'' ("Mouse").
** The WWII-era German self-propelled gun known as the ''Hummel'' (bumblebee) looks like [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hummel_(artillery) this]].
** Two huge German Krupp K5 railroad guns were used to defend against the Allied landing at Anzio, Italy in 1944. Their crews nicknamed them ''Leopold'' and ''Robert'', which are men's names and only slightly cutesy... but the Allied soldiers who were taking fire from the guns called them ''Anzio Express'' and ''Anzio Annie''.
** The current German army has a difficult time finding acceptance with the civilian population, so they avoid overly aggressive or martial names for their equipment. Combat vehicles often have names like "mongoose", "weasel", or "dingo", which are all cute animals, but also very vicious predators.
* As well as giving the Germans a run for their money when giving cutesy nicknames to German weapons, the Allies had their own fair share of such names.
** [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Little_boy Little Boy]] and [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fat_Man Fat Man]], the atomic bombs dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki respectively. The very first bomb, tested at Alamogordo, was simply called "The Gadget".
* And British tanks in the early part of WWII had some pretty cute names, too. How about the "Valentine" (because production started on Feb 14th) or the "Matilda" (which depending on which story you believe, was either named from a cartoon duck popular at the time or was German for "victory")
** The RAF dropped 4000 lb "Cookies" on German targets throughout the war.
** ... and 12,000 lb "Tallboys".
*** Seemingly Sir Barnes Wallis was a bridge player as he named the 22,000 lb bomb as ''Grand Slam''.
* ''Molotov Bread Basket'' for the [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Molotov_bread_basket Soviet WWII cluster bomb]]. The Soviets, who firebombed Helsinki in 1939, [[BlatantLies claimed to just drop bread to the starving Helsinki children]].
** The Finns developed [[TakeThat "a drink to go with the main course"]] - [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Molotov_cocktail Molotov Cocktail]]
* Several variants of Russian rocket artillery were named ''Katyusha'', which is a cutesy nickname for "Catherine" and the title of a [[NewerThanTheyThink 1938 song]] about a young woman waiting for her lover to return.
** The Tupolev SB-2 bomber bore the same nickname.
*** This has resulted in quite a few jokes about "Katyusha walking out onto the shore" (a line from the song)... to unleash a barrage of rocket death on the enemy.
*** The Germans referred to it as "Stalin's Organ" ([[AccidentalInnuendo no, not]] [[FreudWasRight that one]]) from the sound the rockets made and the way the rockets were mounted in a mounted in a single row of tubes, resembling a pipe organ.
** Similar to the ''Katyusha'' was the American T34 [[MacrossMissileMassacre multiple rocket launcher]] mounted on the M4 Sherman medium tank. Dubbed "Calliope" due to the similarity between the launch tubes (''60'' of them) and the musical instrument.
* Cannons have been named for as long as there have ''been'' cannons. Since there was no standardization for the bore sizes, the balls and loading and cleaning equipment had to be custom-made for each cannon. Naming the cannons made it easier for the less-well-paid members of the cannon crew to fetch the right equipment.
* Humpty Dumpty (yes, the one in the nursery rhyme) was originally a cannon in the English Civil War!
** And before gunpowder, siege engines got the same sort of treatment. During the [[TheCrusades siege of Acre]], King Phillip II of France famously nicknamed one of his two trebuchets "Bad Neighbor". (The other one was "[[NamesToRunAwayFromReallyFast God's Own Sling]]"; the opposing Muslim army had its counterpart, "Bad Kinsman").
*** The two trebuchets even get a cameo in a mission depicting that siege in ''VideoGame/AgeOfEmpiresII''.
** The very word "gun" is believed to derive from the woman's name "Gunhilda", possibly because of a large English ballista with that nickname that was built around the time gunpowder weapons were becoming common.
* There is a very large medieval bombard known as Mons Meg which is kept at Edinburgh Castle. Mons refers to the location of one of the early testing sites; TheOtherWiki is not entirely sure where the name Meg came from.
* The American CivilWar brings us Pumpkin-Slingers (rifles with unusually heavy bullets), Donkey-Kickers (rifles that had a ''lot'' of recoil), and wormcastles and tacks (biscuits that are stale to the point of being harder than rocks).
** Nowadays, we call that "[[Literature/{{Discworld}} Dwarf Bread]]" or ''[[Literature/LordOfTheRings cram]].''
*** Finnish army hardtack bread is called ''vaneri'' (literally "plywood").
* Russian 18th-century howitzers were called "Unicorns".
** Russia in general has a lot of fun with this tradition. It has self-propelled artillery pieces named after flowering plants ("Acacia", "Hyacinth", "Peony"), mortars with the same naming scheme ("Tulip", "Knapweed"), an autocannon named "Ballerina", anti-tank missile "Pipsqueak", anti-ship missile "Mosquito" and, ta-dam! - mobile incendiary rocket launching system called "Buratino" (basically, Pinocchio). Unfortunately, most of these names are not used by foreign military experts, who prefer to use ReportingNames.
* There was an early-1960s era Soviet antiarmor guided missile with the NATO ReportingName of AT-1 "Swatter," but which Russian troops nicknamed the "Shmel", or "Bumblebee".
** "Shmel" is (also?) [[http://world.guns.ru/grenade/gl46-e.htm something else altogether]]. Namely, a launcher of a fuel-air explosive grenade. That is, it's not tank-killing, but it creates a three-metre exploding cloud that takes out everyone in a room, regardless of their personal armor. And a wall or two.
** "[[http://world.guns.ru/grenade/gl36-e.htm Canary]]" is a flashless and noiseless underbarrel grenade launcher.
* One of the anti-aircraft guns used on US naval ships was a 1.1 inch quad gun nicknamed "The Chicago Piano." Prior to that, "Chicago Piano" was a nickname for the Thompson submachine gun, AKA the Tommy-gun.
** Or maybe, since the Tommy-gun is also known as "Chicago typewriter", the nickname was chosen to mean "bigger than a Tommy-gun".
** The British equivalent was called the "Pom-pom", after the noise it made when fired, with four or eight barrels to a turret.
* The suitcase that U.S. Presidents have near them at all times containing the nuclear launch codes is creepily but hilariously nicknamed "the football," and the card holding the code to open the football is called "the biscuit." (The former nickname seems to have confused the Brits who created ''ComicBook/{{Watchmen}}'', as in one scene the President is shown carrying a suitcase that is ''literally shaped like a football''.) The person carrying the "football" is often referred to as "the quarterback".
** The Russian equivalent is called just "the little nuclear suitcase" (its official name is "Cheget").
* The Dutch anti-missile system consisting of a radar commanding a [[GatlingGood GAU-8 30mm Gatling gun]] (yes, the exact same kind they [[MemeticMutation strap planes to]]), is called the "Goalkeeper".