The ''Mediochre Q Seth'' series, otherwise "The Mediochreverse" or just "The Mediochre Series" - although that last [[JustForFun/IThoughtItMeant sounds unfortunate]] – is an in-progress five-part UrbanFantasy series by Calum P Cameron. He started writing it while in high school, primarily out of boredom, but also out of a desire to see if he could write a story about a [[MarySue unique and powerful]] [[Series/DoctorWho Doctor-like]] individual while having them [[DeconstructedTrope remain realistically human and fallible]].

Also, he [[AuthorAppeal really likes]] [[InstantAwesomeJustAddDragons dragons]].

Charlotte Johnson is an OrdinaryHighSchoolStudent from [[{{Eagleland}} the USA]] whose parents have forced her to move to Edinburgh, Scotland – with predictably resentful results on her part. So far, so normal. Then, one day, she is almost run over by a lorry.

The driver of this lorry is one [[TryToFitThatOnABusinessCard Professor Doctor Laird Sir Mediochre Quirinius Seth, PhD MusD MSc CBE OBE MIMC VC-Bar]] – although he prefers just 'Mediochre' or 'Dr Seth' – an eccentric 'dracologist' from the parallel society that has existed for generations hidden from Charlotte’s own world by a government-enforced {{Masquerade}}. A society very much like her own, but with a few important differences – most obviously: magic.

The world turns out to be a lot more dangerous and interesting than Charlotte had initially assumed, full of giant dragons, emotionless half-vampires, powerful magic-users (or 'mancers', to use [[InsistentTerminology the correct term]]) and, of course, Mediochre himself, who's never been the same since [[DarkAndTroubledPast an accident in his past]] left him [[WhoWantsToLiveForever immortal]], [[CantGrowUp trapped in a fifteen-year-old body]] and [[AwesomenessByAnalysis able to calculate probabilities exactly at the drop of a hat]]. And those are the people on ''her'' side. Or at least, she's pretty sure they are. It's hard to tell, sometimes...

For more information, visit the series's [[ website]].

When complete, the series will consist of:

* ''The Good, the Bad and the Mediochre'' ([[ Available now]]) – in which Charlotte pretty-much [[JumpedAtTheCall forces]] her way into Mediochre’s ongoing adventure in returning a rare dragon egg to its mother and thwarting the dragon-slaying attempts of an international smuggling ring. But things are never that simple around Mediochre, and it starts to look like there may be a grander conspiracy at work here...
* ''Black, White and Shades of Mediochre'' ([[ Ditto]]) - in which a mancy-related murder [[TheCallKnowsWhereYouLive practically on Charlotte's doorstep]] gives her a way back into the Mantically Aware world and Mediochre's life, just in time for them to get uncomfortably caught up in the increasingly-murky issue of [[FantasticRacism Undead-human relations]]. Naturally, it soon turns out that something even ''worse'' than murder is going down here, and if someone doesn't stop it then the consequences will be world-changing...
* ''Caught Mediochre-Handed'' - ([[ Also ditto]]) - in which [[TyrantTakesTheHelm Maccabeus Fervour's inability to run the country]] and a risky BatmanGambit by Queen MAB to get rid of him before he starts a war leads to a mass prison escape at [[TheAlcatraz the Stygian Secure Unit]], leaving Charlotte and Mediochre with a quarantined country and a whole bunch of [[SealedEvilInACan Unsealed Evils Previously In A Can]] to deal with while Joseph and Dhampinella become SealedGoodInACan through the actions of an increasingly paranoid Fervour...
* ''Sent into Mediochre-drive''
* ''Mediochrity''

In addition, it has become customary for the author to write a "[[ChristmasEpisode Christmas Special]]" short story every December - seemingly working his way through the main party of characters and focusing one story on each. Thus far, these include:

* ''[[ Born to Raise the Sons of Earth]]'' - featuring [[TheLancer Joseph Carrion]].
* ''[[ Please to Put a Penny in the Old Man's Hat]]'' - featuring [[TheHero Mediochre himself]].
** ''[[ A Visit From the Yule Goat]]'' - a "poem of [[LooseCanon ambiguous canonicity]]" released alongside ''Please to Put a Penny in the Old Man's Hat''.
* ''[[ To You and Your Kin]]'' - featuring [[TheBigGuy Dhampinella]].

For Christmas 2012, the author also wrote a [[ChristmasEpisode Christmas Special]] short story featuring [[TheLancer Joseph Carrion]] which functions as a sort of prequel to the main series. It was initially posted to his [[ Facebook page]], but eventually uploaded to the website [[ here]].

A second ChristmasEpisode followed for Christmas 2013, this time featuring Mediochre himself, and can be viewed [[ here]], along with its "[[LooseCanon ambiguously canon]]" companion piece [[ here]].

For those wondering, the name 'Mediochre' is an intentional pun on '[[ mediocre]]' – although in-universe, Mediochre insists it’s a shade of red between [[ pale ochre and dark ochre]].

The author is ''[[Tropers/CorruptMaleMenace literally]]'' OneOfUs, so expect [[TropeOverdosed a lot of tropes]].

!! The main series provides examples of:

%% ZeroContextExample entries are not allowed on wiki pages. All such entries have been commented out. Add context to the entries before uncommenting them.

[[folder: Series as a Whole]]
* ActionGirl: Dhampinella and, to a lesser extent, Charlotte and Rowan.
%% * ActionHero: Joseph.
* AdventurerOutfit: Mediochre.
* AerithAndBob: Mediochre and Charlotte. Joseph and Dhampinella. The list goes on.
* AliensInCardiff: All sorts of magic-related nasties seem to turn up in Scotland these days...
* AntiHero: Mediochre and Joseph both, in different ways. Mediochre aims to be an IdealHero but his impatience, [[HotBlooded hot-bloodedness]] and frightening capacity for cruelty when you push his BerserkButton cause him to fall short. Joseph, meanwhile, is a PragmaticHero more than willing to commit morally reprehensible deeds out of loyalty to Mediochre and his plans.
%% * AppliedPhlebotinum: Chips the IMP.
* TheApprentice: A standard method of education among the Mantically Aware. Dhampinella is Joseph's.
* AuthorAvatar: Mediochre looks much like the author did aged fifteen. The author has also noted that, personality-wise, Mediochre is similar to what he would be if he was an idealist. And more badass.
* AwesomeMcCoolname: Most Mantically Aware. Justified – they choose their own.
* AwesomenessByAnalysis: Mediochre's gift with probability.
* BadassBookworm: Joseph and, to a lesser extent, Mediochre.
* BadassNormal: Joseph. In a world full of magic-users, TheUndead and HalfHumanHybrids, this guy comes across as particularly badass despite having, at best, [[CharlesAtlasSuperpower Charles Atlas]] ImprobableAimingSkills.
* BadassLongcoat: Joseph and Dhampinella.
* BadassTeacher: Mediochre and Joseph are both university professors. Joseph actually has an apprentice with him during most of his adventures – although the apprentice is also a badass and doesn't really need protecting.
* BatDeduction: Justified with Mediochre.
* BerserkButton: While within range of Mediochre, it is never a good idea to harm a child or a dragon. Harming a child dragon will earn you instant death.
%% * BewareTheNiceOnes: Mediochre.
%% * BigGood: Queen MAB fills this role.
* BigWhat: A staple of any conversation amongst the main TrueCompanions.
* BlackAndGreyMorality: Charlotte is the only consistently 'good' hero.
* BrainsAndBrawn: Mediochre and Joseph.
* BrokenMasquerade: The story starts with Mediochre accidentally breaking it for Charlotte.
%% * BuffySpeak
* BystanderSyndrome: Most Mantically Aware buildings have enchantments that induce this.
* CampStraight: Mediochre.
* CantGrowUp: Mediochre only ages if he gets damaged enough.
* CelibateEccentricGenius: Mediochre. The genius is natural, the eccentricity is implied to be his way of coping with his unusual life, and the celibacy... well, he's [[{{Squick}} physically fifteen]] and [[MayflyDecemberRomance practically immortal]]. It'd be [[NoYay awkward]].
%% * TheChampion:
%% ** Joseph for Mediochre.
%% ** Dhampinella for Joseph.
* ChekhovsGun: Several, including Chips, at least one sword and a few actual guns.
* ChekhovsSkill: Mediochre's training as [[spoiler: a street magician and escapologist]] becomes relevant.
* CheshireCatGrin: One of Mediochre's default expressions.
* TheChessmaster: Whoever leads The Organisation Which I Represent...
* ChronicHeroSyndrome: Mediochre seems to have a bit of this going on.
* ClothesMakeTheLegend: Mediochre, Joseph and Dhampinella all have unique and notable costumes.
* CluelessMystery: Mediochre has a habit of revealing clues that suddenly make everything obvious just as we get to The Reveal. In fairness, though, there are usually other, less obvious clues scattered around beforehand.
* TheCommissionerGordon: Queen MAB to Mediochre.
%% * ContemplateOurNavels: Mediochre. All the time.
* CoolTeacher: Mediochre and Joseph. Don't say you don't wish your tutor took you out Undead-hunting.
* CrazyPrepared: Mediochre. He trained his ''mouse'' to [[spoiler: provide a distraction if they got captured]].
* CreatorProvincialism: Most of the action takes place in Scotland, the author’s home country, and the majority of the characters live in Edinburgh, the city of his birth.
* CulturedBadass: Mediochre.
* CuteBruiser: For a twisted definition of 'cute', Dhampinella.
* CuteMonsterGirl: Mostly subverted – Dhampinella is only cute in a StoicWoobie sort of a way.
%% * DarkAndTroubledPast: Mediochre.
* DarkIsNotEvil: Joseph and Dhampinella.
* DeadpanSnarker: Everyone, but Charlotte and Mediochre stand out.
%% * DefectiveDetective: Mediochre.
* DemBones: Skeletons are the lowest form of Undead, and are mentioned periodically.
%% * {{Dhampyr}}: Spelt 'Dhampir' here.
* ElderlyImmortal: Melz.
* EmotionlessGirl: Dhampinella (usually).
* {{Epigraph}}: Perhaps as a testament to his own [[OneOfUs nerdiness]], the author prefers to use the ''Oxford English Dictionary'' for these.
* EpunymousTitle: Every book in the series will have a pun on Mediochre's name in the title.
** ''The Good, the Bad and the Mediochre'' is a pun on 'mediocre' meaning 'of middling quality' and a reference to ''Film/TheGoodTheBadAndTheUgly''.
** ''Black, White and Shades of Mediochre'' is a pun on 'ochre' and a reference to the MoralityKitchenSink ([[BlackAndWhiteMorality Black, White]] and [[GreyAndGreyMorality Shades of Grey]]). Hopefully not a reference to any other [[Literature/FiftyShadesOfGrey shades of grey]].
** ''Caught Mediochre-Handed'' is a pun on 'red-handed'.
** ''Sent Into Mediochre-drive'' is a pun on 'over-drive'.
** ''Mediochrity'' is a pun on 'Mediocrity' - 'the quality of being mediocre'.
* ExoticDetective: Mediochre. A slayer-catcher who can [[AwesomenessByAnalysis calculate probabilities on the fly]]. Oh, and [[HealingFactor heal really fast]].
* ExpectingSomeoneTaller: Even when people recognise Mediochre, they are often surprised by how puny he is.
* {{Expy}}: The author admits Mediochre bears several similarities to ''Franchise/IndianaJones'', [[Series/DoctorWho the Doctor]] and ''Literature/SkulduggeryPleasant''.
* EurekaMoment: Mediochre, repeatedly.
* EverythingsSpoonierWithSpoons: Mediochre's default method for getting attention is asking someone strong to hammer a spork off a table.
* EveryoneCallsHimBarkeep: The tempomancer.
* ExtranormalInstitute: St Merlin's University.
* FamedInStory: Everyone has at least heard the rumours about Mediochre.
* FantasticRacism: Mostly against dragons and Undead.
* FantasyKitchenSink: Dragons, unicorns, magic, Undead, semi-intelligent mobiles...
* FascinatingEyebrow: One of Mediochre's default expressions.
%% * FishOutOfWater: Charlotte, initially.
* FiveManBand:
** TheHero[=/=]TheSmartGuy: Mediochre.
** TheLancer: Joseph.
** TheBigGuy: Dhampinella.
** TheChick: Charlotte.
** TeamPet: Desra.
%% * {{Flashback}}: Several used from the second book onwards.
* FlatWhat: Almost as common as [[BigWhat Big "WHAT?!"s]].
* FourTemperamentEnsemble: The main four.
** Mediochre is Choleric (HotBlooded, [[BerserkButton occasionally tempestuous]], [[TheLeader dominant]], etc)
** Joseph is Sanguine ([[BoisterousBruiser enthusiastic]], [[FunPersonified cheerful]], etc)
** Dhampinella is Melancholic ([[TheStoic detached]], [[IceQueen brooding]], etc)
** Charlotte is Phlegmatic (Well, sort-of - believers in the Four Humours would probably have filed her under [[TakeAThirdOption Leukine]], actually, but compared at least to Mediochre she's a bit of an [[TheChick introverted people-person]].)
%% * FromDressToDressing: Joseph does this.
* FunWithAcronyms:
** The Organisation Which I Represent – TOWIR.
** Mantically Aware Britain - MAB.
** Intrusively Mantic Phone - IMP.
%% * GambitPileup
* GeekPhysique: Mediochre is stuck in the body of an awkward teenager.
* GoodIsNotNice: Mediochre, Joseph and Queen MAB to varying degrees.
%% * GoodThingYouCanHeal:
%% ** Mediochre.
%% ** Dhampinella.
* GreatDetective: This is basically Mediochre's superpower.
* TheGroup: The Organisation Which I Represent.
%% * GuileHero: Mediochre.
* TheGunslinger: Joseph.
* HalfHumanHybrid: Dhampinella is half-Vampire.
* HangingSeparately: Mediochre and the [=MABGov=], especially Chrome.
* HealingFactor: Mediochre, because of [[spoiler:his dragon's blood]].
* HealingHands: Medimancy.
* HeroicSafeMode: Mediochre tends to go into this rather than [[HeroicBSOD BSOD]]ing.
* HeterosexualLifePartners: Mediochre and Joseph.
* HotBlooded: Mediochre and Joseph.
* ImmortalImmaturity: Mediochre zig-zags this.
* {{Immortality}}: Mediochre and Melz have Type III (Regenerative). Maelstrom has a cross between Type III and Type VII (External). Undead obviously have Type V (Undead).
* ImmortalityImmorality: A major theme of the series. Maelstrom in the first book, [[spoiler: the necromancer]] in the second and Stormhold Elect in ''Born to Raise the Sons of Earth'' are all major [[TheHeavy Heavy]] villains who can cheat death and are at least partially motivated by a desire to continue cheating death. Melz somehow manages to be an aversion, remaining a kindly old lady. Mediochre himself... is ''trying'' to avert it, but he's [[ByronicHero pretty]] [[BrokenAce bad]] at it.
* ImpoverishedPatrician: Mediochre is technically a laird (among other things) but seemingly requires multiple jobs to get the money needed to justify not selling his house.
* ImprobableAimingSkills: Joseph.
* IncrediblyLamePun: Mediochre is fond of them.
* IndyPloy: Mediochre and Joseph’s default Plan B seems to be "wing it".
* InsistentTerminology: Magic is called 'mancy'. Mediochre and Joseph are Doctors – although they only insist on that one with people they dislike.
* TheInsomniac: Mediochre doesn't ever seem to sleep until he actually has to.
%%* InspectorJavert: Chrome, to an extent.
* InstantAwesomeJustAddDragons: Well, duh. Mediochre's a dracologist.
* InsufferableGenius: Mediochre. Oh ''so'' much.
* InterdisciplinarySleuth: Mediochre and Joseph are scientific researchers and university professors who also happen to catch monster-slayers on the side.
* InvisibleToNormals: There are enchantments that can do this.
* IronLady: Queen MAB.
%% * JerkWithAHeartOfGold:
%% ** Mediochre.
%% ** Your Almighty God.
* {{Ladyella}}: Dhampinella.
* LargeHam: Mediochre. So much.
%% * LemonyNarrator: Of the sarcastic and self-referential kind.
* LightningBruiser: All Dhampir and Vampires.
* LonelyPianoPiece: Mediochre plays them occasionally.
* MadeOfIron: Vampires, Dhampir, and [[BadassNormal Joseph]].
* MagicAIsMagicA: Mancy does have consistent rules, and at least some types are consistent enough to be taught and studied in university. We don't get most of it explained, though.
* MagicianDetective: Sort-of. Mediochre is a slayer-catcher who has 'MIMC' after his name. [[spoiler: [[ChekhovsSkill This comes in useful]].]]
* MakingASplash: Hydromancy.
* TheManBehindTheMan: TOWIR are somehow behind pretty-much everything that goes wrong, it seems.
* TheMasquerade: The Mantically-Aware.
* MasterOfIllusion: Iconomancy.
* MementoMacGuffin: The dragon scale Charlotte gets from Deep Ocean probably counts.
%% * MemeticBadass: Mediochre, in-universe.
* MerlinSickness: Mediochre used to have it. Now he CantGrowUp again.
* MilkyWhiteEyes: Melz.
* {{Mooks}}: The SSS in Book I.
* {{Muggles}}: The Mantically Unaware.
* MysteriousMiddleInitial: Averted with Mediochre Q Seth, who freely admits that his middle name is Quirinius. However, in a more meta example, the author publishes under Calum P Cameron, and makes several jokes out of what the P could potentially stand for.
* MysteriousPast: Touched on with Mediochre and a few others.
* NamesToRunAwayFromReallyFast: Joseph ''Carrion''. '''Maelstrom'''.
%% * NarrativeProfanityFilter
* NebulousEvilOrganisation: TOWIR.
* NiceHat: Mediochre's isn't really all that nice, beyond its impressive fireproofing, but he treats it as such.
* NonActionGuy: Mediochre, with a few brief exceptions.
* NoNameGiven: The Mantically Aware mostly use aliases. TOWIR use aliases for aliases.
* NoPartyGiven: Queen MAB.
* NotGrowingUpSucks: Mediochre is not a fan of puberty.
* TheNotLoveInterest: Joseph and Dhampinella; Mediochre and Joseph.
* NotThatKindOfDoctor: Mediochre and Joseph have both picked up some useful medical skills, but technically they're only qualified to work on dragons and Undead respectively.
%% * ObstructiveBureaucrat: James Chrome.
* OccultDetective: Mediochre and Joseph are private slayer-catchers, which largely amounts to the same thing.
%% * OneManArmy: Dhampinella.
* OutGambitted: Pulling this off is what Mediochre seems to be for.
* OvershadowedByAwesome: Joseph is pretty sharp himself.
* PlatonicLifePartners: Joseph and Dhampinella.
* PlayingWithFire: Pyromancy.
%% * PoisonousFriend: Joseph.
* PostModernMagick: Technomancy.
* PretentiousLatinMotto: Two of them above Mediochre's door.
* PrimeDirective: Not breaking the Masquerade for the MAUN.
* TheProfessor: Mediochre and, to a lesser extent, Joseph.
* PunnyName: Rowan Berry; Danny Boy Snapfax.
* PurpleProse: Played straight and PlayedForLaughs at different points.
* TheQuietOne: Dhampinella.
* RagtagBunchOfMisfits: It seems Mediochre is naturally inclined to befriend misfits over normal people.
%% Who? * ReallySevenHundredYearsOld: Only [[spoiler:400]], but still.
* ReasonableAuthorityFigure: Queen MAB.
* RebelWithoutACause: Mediochre seems to dislike authority in general. Probably because it questions his dominance.
* ReedRichardsIsUseless: Zig-zagged. The mantically-aware have been making some subtle improvements to the world, but they're very cautious about not doing too much or breaking the {{Masquerade}}.
%% * RetiredBadass: Melinda Quinn.
* RuleOfDrama: Mediochre sometimes uses this in-universe.
* SavedByTheAwesome: Mediochre by Queen MAB, at first.
%% * ScrewTheRulesImDoingWhatsRight
* SelfMutilationDemonstration: Mediochre does it when he wants to prove that his opponents really do not want to fight him.
%% * SequelHook: Courtesy of the tempomancer.
* SesquipedalianLoquaciousness: Mediochre on occasion.
* SesquipedalianSmith: Mediochre Seth.
* ShoutOut: Many. Repeatedly to Series/TheATeam, for [[AuthorAppeal some reason]].
* ShroudedInMyth: Mediochre may or may not be intentionally fostering some of the rumours about him.
* SignificantGreenEyedRedhead: Dhampinella (technically it's auburn or copper, but her eyes are ''very'' green to make up for it, and she's the second-most significant female present). It adds to the whole 'striking, inhuman creature' shtick she's got going on.
* SinglePowerSuperheroes: Most of the mancies seem to revolve around being able to do one specific superpower really well.
* SmugSuper: Mediochre has a few abnormalities that could be called super-powers. Modesty is not one of them.
* SoYouWantToLiveForever: Generally speaking, the bad guys want to, the good guys [[WhoWantsToLiveForever don't.]]
* TheSpock: Dhampinella.
* StealthPun: TOWIR. As in 'of Babel'.
* TheStoic: Dhampinella.
%% * StuffBlowingUp: Lampshaded in the introduction to the first book.
* TakeThat: Edgar Rice Burroughs in Book I.
* TechnicalPacifist: Emphasis on the 'technical'.
* {{Telepathy}}: Psychomancy.
* TerseTalker: Dhampinella.
* ThemeMusicPowerUp: Mediochre thinks better when playing awesome music.
* ThemeNaming: All TOWIR operatives refer to each other by the names of expensive stones.
%% * TheyFightCrime
* TimeMaster: Tempomancy.
* TimeStandsStill: Tempomancy, if you’re good enough.
%% * TokenNonHuman: Dhampinella.
%% * TranquilFury: Mediochre.
* TryToFitThatOnABusinessCard: Professor Doctor Laird Sir Mediochre Quirinius Seth, [=PhD=] [=MusD=] [=MSc=] CBE OBE MIMC VC-Bar. Grade 8 in piano.
* TwoferTokenMinority: Melz is [[UpToEleven old, female, disabled, blind and deaf]].
* UnwittingPawn: Everyone. If you aren't unintentionally working for TOWIR, you're unintentionally working ''against'' them for Mediochre.
* TheVerse: The Mediochreverse. The author began to use this term to refer to the world of his own work, and it kinda stuck.
* VitriolicBestBuds: Mediochre and Charlotte evolve into this.
* TheWatson: Charlotte.
* WeaksauceWeakness: All of the classic Undead weaknesses are out in force. [[spoiler: Dhampinella almost has several used against her at once]].
* WellIntentionedExtremist: The tempomancer claims TOWIR is this.
* WhatMeasureIsANonHuman?: Discussed for dragons.
* {{Whatevermancy}}: So far mentioned are necromancy (death), pyromancy (fire), hydromancy (water), technomancy (technology and enchantment), medimancy (healing), tempomancy (time), iconomancy (images), thermomancy (heat), phobiamancy (fear), philiamancy (love), and psychomancy (minds).
* WhatTheHellIsThatAccent:
** The tempomancer.
** Maelstrom.
** Dhampinella.
* WhoWantsToLiveForever: Melz and Mediochre don't.
* AWizardDidIt: The [[WordOfGod official line]] on any cases of CriticalResearchFailure is that the mantically-aware society is further ahead in their understanding of the world than modern science. Or: "[[InsaneTrollLogic I'm not wrong; the WORLD is wrong]]."
* WorldOfBadass: Most characters, even if not very good in a physical fight, are pretty badass in their own way, or become so over the course of the series.
* WorldOfSnark: Even the narrator gets in on it.
* XanatosSpeedChess:
-->'''Obsidian:''' She can easily be written in.
* YouCantThwartStageOne: TOWIR are already on Stage III by the start of the first book.
* YouNoTakeCandle: Dr Modern lapses into this when he’s not concentrating.

[[folder: The Good, the Bad and the Mediochre]]
%%* AbsentMindedProfessor: Dean Kiwi Mashuga. [[spoiler:Subverted.]]
* AddedAlliterativeAppeal: The Sapphire Smuggling Syndicate.
* AndYourLittleDogToo: The SSS thugs threatening Charlotte.
%%* ArchEnemy: Mediochre and Maelstrom go way back...
* ArsonMurderAndJaywalking: The list of charges against Mediochre ends on 'disturbing the peace'.
%%* BadassGrandpa: Forthan Forth.
* BadassInANiceSuit: Antler, until he suffers ClothingDamage.
* BarbarianHero: Maelstrom is a deconstruction.
* {{BFG}}: Missile-Bee Launchers.
%%* BigBadFriend: [[spoiler:Sapphire.]]
%%* BigDamnHeroes: [[spoiler:Joseph]] vs Isobel; [[spoiler:Mediochre]] vs Maelstrom.
* BillBillJunkBill: Charlotte looking into classrooms.
--> Empty, empty, empty, empty except for a teacher who clearly didn't get enough of her classroom when she was actually teaching or something...
%%* BitchInSheepsClothing: [[spoiler:Kiwi Mashuga]].
* TheCavalry: Subverted. [[spoiler:The timely arrival of the MIPF at the end wasn't ''quite'' timely ''enough'' to help much]].
* CheckAndMate: Subverted for laughs. Mediochre, being a smug git, sets things up to let him pull one of these on the BigBad - but forgets to factor in the fact that he has the body of a [[GeekPhysique scrawny teenager]] and the BigBad is capable of cutting off his airway before he can finish.
-->'''Mediochre:''' You made me ruin it, you moron. It was gonna be so good, [[LampshadeHanging like one of those smug moments in a film]]. You were gonna say 'what?' and I was gonna... look, let’s try that again: [[spoiler: Kiwi]]?
-->'''[[spoiler:Kiwi]]:''' What?!
-->'''Mediochre:''' [[spoiler:The CCTV’s still on]].
-->'''[[spoiler:Kiwi]]:''' [[OutGambitted WHAT]]?
* ClothingDamage: "Dhampinella’s biggest injury seemed to have been to her coat." Antler's suit also gets ruined by the explosion.
* TheCoatsAreOff: Dhampinella, before [[spoiler: taking on the entire SSS army at once]].
* CPRCleanPrettyReliable: Averted.
-->'''Joseph:''' [[spoiler: I can’t do CPR on someone who doesn't ''have'' a chest!]]
* CuttingTheKnot: Mediochre once brought down a whole load of criminals in a single blow by punching the fire alarm. Joseph gets into an SSS store room by breaking the lock.
* DaChief: The St Merlin's Security Chief.
* DamselInDistress: Hélène.
%%* DiabolicalMastermind: Sapphire.
* DistinctionWithoutADifference: Charlotte's "I wasn’t drooling; I was admiring" and Joseph's "It’s not hypocrisy; it's [[PerfectlyCromulentWord Mediochrisy]]".
* DominoRevelation: Charlotte struggles to cope with the fact the world won't ''stop'' defying what she believes it to be like.
* DoomedHometown: Maelstrom's FreudianExcuse.
%%* DragonWithAnAgenda: [[spoiler:Maelstrom and the tempomancer]].
* DramaticPause: Mediochre.
-->'''Mediochre:''' I have... a plan.
* EggMcguffin: Glint.
* EmpathicEnvironment: "Charlotte would have sworn that the temperature in the room had just dropped."
* EtTuBrute: Mediochre is really displeased when [[spoiler: Kiwi turns out to be evil]].
* EverythingsBetterWithPrincesses: [[spoiler: Hélène]].
* EvilCounterpart: Maelstrom to Mediochre.
* EvilInc: The Sapphire Storage Facility, a front for the [[TheSyndicate Sapphire Smuggling Syndicate]].
* EvilMatriarch: [[spoiler:Kiwi puts her own daughter in danger to further her scheme]].
* Evil Teacher: [[spoiler:Dean Kiwi Mashuga]] (OK, technically [[spoiler:a Dean is not a teacher]]).
* ExactWords: [[spoiler:How Isobel beats the lie detector]].
* ExitVillainStageLeft: [[spoiler:Danny and the tempomancer]].
* ExpositionOfImmortality: Melinda's paintings show that Mediochre is even older than he had previously implied.
* EyeScream: [[spoiler:Deep Ocean]] gets a stun dart in the eye.
* FamilyUnfriendlyDeath: [[spoiler: Both the dragon in the painting and Maelstrom]].
%%* FemmeFatale: Beth Diamond is an inversion.
* FiveBadBand:
** BigBad: Sapphire.
** TheDragon: Antler.
** TheBrute: Maelstrom.
** TheEvilGenius: The tempomancer.
** TheDarkChick: Isobel.
* FreudianExcuse: Maelstrom's hatred of dragons stems from the destruction of his home village.
* FriendlyEnemy: Mediochre and Queen MAB. Lampshaded via [[WesternAnimation/LooneyTunes Sam and Ralph]] reference.
* FriendOrIdolDecision: Given to Mediochre and Joseph by the tempomancer.
* GetAHoldOfYourselfMan: Combined with MegatonPunch by Joseph [[spoiler: to snap Mediochre out of it when he goes psycho]].
* GunsAkimbo: One of the SSS thugs.
%% * HeelFaceTurn: [[spoiler:Oscar and Stephanie.]]
%% * HeroicSacrifice: [[spoiler:Subverted by Danny]].
%% * IHaveYourWife: We have your many-times-great aunt.
%% * IKnowYouKnowIKnow
* ImpossiblyTackyClothes: Kiwi Mashuga, for [[ItAmusedMe lulz]].
* InfinityPlusOneSword: Maelstrom's Blood Iron sword.
* IronicEcho: "You have something of mine", and later, "[[spoiler: It ''is'' all in the wrist!]]".
* ITakeOffenseToThatLastOne: Charlotte is less affronted by Mediochre's [[spoiler: leaving]] than by his inability to use a door like a normal person.
* ItIsPronouncedTroPAY: Dhampinella's name is pronounced "Vamp-in-ella".
-->'''Joseph:''' "Spelt with a D-H, pronounced with a V. Don't ask me why; her parents were weird."
* ItsPersonalWithTheDragon: The relationship of greatest enmity in the book is that between Mediochre and Maelstrom, the man who very nearly killed him centuries ago, directly led to his current condition, and who literally kills Mediochre's favourite animals for a living. Plot-wise, however, Maelstrom is at best a DragonWithAnAgenda to [[BigBad Sapphire]] and UnwittingPawn of the [[GreaterScopeVillain tempomancer]].
* KansasCityShuffle: How they get both in and out of [[spoiler: the Sapphire Storage Facility]].
%% * LetsSplitUpGang: Complete with ScoobyDoo reference.
* MadeOfExplodium: Fire glands.
* MauveShirt: Oscar, Stephanie and Kurt.
* {{Metaphorgotten}}:
-->'''Mediochre:''' This whole scene could have stepped out of a cheesy fantasy adventure were it not for the fact that scenes are incapable of stepping anywhere due to severe deficiency in the foot department.
* MilkmanConspiracy: Sapphire is actually [[spoiler: Kiwi Mashuga]].
* TheMole: [[spoiler:Danny is TOWIR's mole, and Kiwi is the SSS's... sort of]].
%% * MookFaceTurn: [[spoiler:Oscar and Stephanie]].
* MotiveRant: Maelstrom gives one to Charlotte.
* MyFriendsAndZoidberg: In the acknowledgements.
--> Every great novelist steals or borrows a lot of material... as it turns out, [[SelfDeprecation the rest of us do it too]].
* MyKungFuIsStrongerThanYours:
-->'''Mediochre:''' "When it comes to freaky powers, I ''do'' beat you."
* NeverBringAKnifeToAFistFight: Sort-of inverted. Danny brings one to a gunfight and, naturally, wins.
* NeverMessWithGranny: Melinda [[spoiler: takes out several thugs from her wheelchair]].
* NobodyTouchesTheHair: Mediochre.
-->'''Mediochre:''' "''[[PunctuatedForEmphasis I... liked... that... hair]]''."
* NoodleImplements: [[TheMedic Prometheus Modern]] has seemingly done surgery with a kitchen knife, some slightly rusted tweezers, a bottle of Schnapps and a length of wool.
* NoodleIncident: Several, most notably Mediochre fighting off a horde of Undead with his teeth.
* OnAScaleFromOneToTen: [[DeadpanSnarker Mediochre]] gives the non-sequitur answer "Tuesday".
* OnlyOneName: Maelstrom.
* OrdinaryHighSchoolStudent: Charlotte.
* OutGambitted: The SSS and then Maelstrom, both by Mediochre.
* OutOfTheInferno: Justified by Isobel, who’s a pyromancer.
* PunctuatedForEmphasis: "''I... liked... that... hair''."
* RedShirtArmy: The MIPF and the SSS.
* RefugeInAudacity: Sapphire uses it to hide herself and her syndicate.
%% * TheReveal:
%% ** Mediochre's 'accident'.
%% ** Sapphire's identity.
* RightHandAttackDog: Beowulf.
* SelfStitching: Joseph doesn't actually ''stitch'' himself, but he does cut a bullet out of his own hand and bind it up.
* ShapedLikeItself: "Unexpected unexpectedness."
* SheIsNotMyGirlfriend: An SSS thug describes Charlotte as Mediochre's girlfriend when they've only just met. Mediochre gets sarcastic at him.
* SherlockScan: Mediochre does it at the dragon's cave.
* SmugSnake: Antler.
* SoYouWantToLiveForever: Maelstrom.
%% * TheStarscream: [[spoiler:The tempomancer]], sort of.
* StealthPun: [[spoiler:[[ComicBook/XMen Kitty Pride]] ''is'' a real person – the character was named after a living artist]].
* StupidSexyFriend: Mediochre suffers from this [[spoiler:in regards to Charlotte.]]
* TeacherStudentRomance: Subverted – Mediochre is determined not to let it get that far.
* ThisMeansWar: Mediochre has his own equivalent phrase.
-->'''Mediochre:''' [[LetsGetDangerous Get me to a piano]].
* TheEndOrIsIt: The last line in the book:
--> "[[spoiler:''Almost'' certainly]]."
* ThoseTwoBadGuys: The Bomb Brothers.
* TreasureRoom: [[spoiler:Deep Ocean]] has several.
* UnfazedEveryman: Charlotte.
* UniversalDriversLicence: Double-subverted – Mediochre can't [[spoiler:fly the helicopter]] initially, but he learns pretty quickly.
* TheUnreveal: Rowan ''almost'' reveals Mediochre's {{Backstory}} to Charlotte.
-->'''Mediochre:''' If she does, she's not permitted to tell you.
* UnwittingPawn: Maelstrom. To several people.
* TheVamp: [[spoiler:Danny seduces Charlotte as part of TOWIR's plan]].
* VirginPower: Both unicorns and dragons are apparently drawn to virgins.
* VisualPun: [[ The cover]] is a shade of red almost slap in the middle of the ochre spectrum. It is literally medi-ochre.
* TheVoice: Most of the members of TOWIR.
* WeCanRuleTogether: [[spoiler:The tempomancer]] offers Joseph the chance to switch sides.
%% * WellExcuseMePrincess: Joseph to Hélène.
* WhatTheHellHero: Bizarrely inverted – Joseph reassures Mediochre that what he did ''was'' justifiable. Joseph seems to be [[TheChampion more loyal to Mediochre than he is to morality]].
* WhoNamesTheirKidDude: Charlotte asks Mediochre something similar concerning his own name.
* WithMyHandsTied: Mediochre reputedly once fought off a horde of Undead with his hands full ([[spoiler: apparently of Joseph's unconscious form]]) and one foot stuck.
%% * YouKilledMyFather: Mentioned as how Dhampinella met Joseph.
* YouShallNotPass: [[spoiler:Dhampinella]] against the SSS. Also [[spoiler: Danny, but his was part of the tempomancer's scheme]].

[[folder: Black, White and Shades of Mediochre]]
* AbsurdlySpaciousSewer: Partially justified. The older parts of Edinburgh's sewage system ''[[RealityIsUnrealistic are]]'' pretty absurdly spacious. And it's mentioned that they've been widened in secret.
* ActionMom: Ms Du Barry. To ridiculous extremes.
* AllYourBaseAreBelongToUs: The attack on [[spoiler: the Dusk, symbolic home of the Undead]].
* ArrowCatch: Almost comically done with a ''paper aeroplane''.
* BadassBoast: [[spoiler: The necromancer]] gives a couple.
* BadassInDistress: [[spoiler: Mediochre]], if you count him as a Badass.
* BadPowersBadPeople: You don’t appear to get good necromancers. Ever. [[BadPowersGoodPeople ...unless you count all the good ''exorcists'']].
* BetterThanABareBulb: This book has even more [[LampshadeHanging lampshades being hung]] than the first one - mostly from Gambit and Joseph.
* BewareTheNiceOnes: Irena – naturally, her being a Pontianak.
* {{BFG}}: Joseph’s flame-charm launcher.
%% * BigBad: [[spoiler:The necromancer.]]
* BigDamnGunship: A fantasy-specific variant with [[spoiler: Leeroy]].
* BigDamnHeroes: Archie and the religious leaders. Twice.
* BigWhat: Noteworthy, because one of them came from ''[[OOCIsSeriousBusiness Dhampinella]]''. Also done in [[UpToEleven three-part harmony]] at one point.
* BloodMagic: It can rejuvenate you if you’re a Vampire.
* BornInTheWrongCentury: Millacra, fortunately for Rowan.
* BreadEggsMilkSquick: "Stake, Bowie knife, splintered end of your own arm..."
%% * CallBack
* CaptainErsatz: Subverted – it’s implied Millacra ''is'' Le Fanu’s Literature/{{Carmilla}}.
* CardCarryingVillain: [[spoiler:The necromancer]].
* CatchAndReturn: Irena does it with a firebomb.
* TheChampion: Quicksilver is a villainous example, with her devotion to Guinevere Spencer.
* ChessMotifs: All over the place, though some of it is FauxSymbolism.
* ClaspYourHandsIfYouDeceive: Fervour. He thinks it looks wise.
* ClothingDamage: So many instances that it becomes noteworthy when Quila Russet ''fails'' to suffer any.
* TheCoatsAreOff: Inverted – Joseph very deliberately dons his coat before he [[LetsGetDangerous gets dangerous]].
* TheCobblersChildrenHaveNoShoes: Sort of – the ambulance driver failed to get his friend to a medic.
%% * ColdBloodedTorture: Scourge Worms.
* CreepyChild: [[spoiler:The necromancer]], although not [[ReallySevenHundredYearsOld exactly]] a child.
* CriticalExistenceFailure: [[spoiler:The necromancer literally explodes all over his own island.]]
* CuttingTheKnot: Joseph gets into the Humanist Movement HQ with threats.
* CutYourHeartOutWithASpoon: Subverted. Joseph threatens to shove a gun down Gambit’s throat so far that it gives him constipation. [[spoiler:He then [[NotHyperbole does so]]. And [[LudicrousGibs fires the gun]].]]
* DeaderThanDead: [[spoiler:The necromancer]] must be killed in body, soul and mind.
* DemonicPossession: [[spoiler:The necromancer]] used this to survive.
* {{Determinator}}: Sable rivals Mediochre himself in this regard.
%% * DeusExMachina
%% * DidYouJustPunchOutCthulhu?: No. I shot him.
* DistressedDude: [[spoiler:Mediochre.]]
* DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything?: Abrahams and Fervour are a little bit fascist, bordering on BNP. Millacra's obsession with Rowan, meanwhile, plays out like a stalking [[spoiler: and attempted rape.]]
* DoubleEntendre: "Until they could sterilise her" wasn't ''meant'' to be one...
%% * {{Dracolich}}: [[spoiler:Leeroy.]]
* TheDragon: Gambit to [[spoiler:the necromancer]]. Tiffany Quicksilver to Guinevere Spencer.
* DramaticWind: Because the only thing [[IncrediblyLamePun cooler]] than Joseph Carrion is Joseph Carrion with air conditioning.
* ElaborateUndergroundBase: Lampshaded ''severely''.
* EnemyMine: Joseph and Charlotte have to team up with [[spoiler:Sable]].
* EnfantTerrible: [[spoiler:The necromancer]]... [[ReallySevenHundredYearsOld sort of]]...
* EverythingsDeaderWithZombies: One of the few types of Undead that aren't important in-book at all – the author just put them in because, in a book about TheUndead, you can't ''not''.
* EvilIsHammy: [[spoiler:The necromancer]] and Guinevere Spencer have their moments, but [[LargeHam Gambit]] blows them out of the park.
* EvilRedhead: Gambit. It's a Strigoi thing.
%% * FaceHeelTurn: [[spoiler:Dr Modern]].
%% * FantasticNuke: [[spoiler:The Reaper]].
* FantasticRacism: The Humanist Movement are a Human Supremacy group.
* FetusTerrible: The necromancer [[spoiler:possessed his current body when it was an embryo.]]
* FiveRoundsRapid: Referenced ''by name'' by [[PopCulturedBadass Joseph]].
* FluffyTheTerrible: [[spoiler: Leeroy]]? [[spoiler: LEEROY]]?
* FoeTossingCharge: Millacra against the Humanists.
* ForcedToWatch: [[spoiler: Obsidian]] threatens Joseph with this regarding Dhampinella to keep him in line.
* ForTheEvulz: [[spoiler: Spencer]] has no interest in the cause beyond it's ability to serve as an excuse to kill things.
* FromACertainPointOfView: Mediochre is the oldest man alive, "depending on what you count as a man".
* GallowsHumour: Mediochre remembers Pigeon for this.
%% * GenocideDilemma
* AGlassOfChianti: Subverted. Archie the Vampire is drinking wine when Charlotte first meets him, but he turns out to be perhaps the only unambiguously-good Vampire in the series.
* GoodScarsEvilScars: Zack Abrahams has an evil one running from his mouth to his eye.
* GoshdangItToHeck: Tanner, until Fervour breaks him.
* GunsAkimbo: Joseph does this when escaping some Vampires.
* HalfBreedDiscrimination: The Humanist Movement towards Dhampir.
%% * HeatWave
* HeelFaceRevolvingDoor: Millacra and Melinoe have both seemingly spent ''decades'' doing this.
%% * HeelFaceTurn:
%% ** [[spoiler:Leeroy]].
%% ** [[spoiler:Sable]] sort of did one before the story began.
%% * HeroicSacrifice:
%% ** [[spoiler:Leeroy.]]
%% **[[spoiler:Millacra.]]
%% * HesBack: Mediochre.
* HoistByHisOwnPetard: [[spoiler:The necromancer, by binding himself to a body]], ensures his eventual death.
* HumansAreBastards: Joseph thinks so.
--> '''Humanist:''' ''(after getting punched)'' Resorting to the Neanderthal now, are we?
--> '''Joseph:''' No. That was pure Homo Sapiens.
* HyperactiveMetabolism: Vampires can regenerate their bodies after drinking enough blood. Drinking Mediochre's blood makes it happen all the faster.
%% * IDidWhatIHadToDo: Joseph's "World of necessity".
%% * IHaveManyNames: Sable and Millacra.
* IHaveYourWife: Obsidian accurately identifies Joseph's weak spot as being [[PlatonicLifePartners Dhampinella]]'s heart.
* ImplacableMan: Gambit's description of Mediochre.
* InfantImmortality: Averted. Poor little [[spoiler:Noddy]].
* IronicEchoCut: "I daresay he can get them out alive" cuts to "What d’ya mean we can’t let them out alive?".
%% * KarmicDeath: [[spoiler:The necromancer.]]
%% * KilledMidSentence: Pigeon.
* KissOfTheVampire: Subverted by [[spoiler:Millacra]], who literally [[FoeYay kisses]] Rowan – and then goes to [[VampireBitesSuck bite her throat out]].
* LargeHam: Gambit. Lampshaded.
* LesbianVampire: Millacra and possibly Guinevere.
* MadDoctor: [[spoiler:Prometheus Modern]].
* MadScientist: [[spoiler:Prometheus Modern]].
* TheManBehindTheMan: [[spoiler: Jasper]] is behind [[spoiler: the necromancer]], with The Organisation Which I Represent behind ''him''.
* MathematiciansAnswer: Mediochre, Tanner, Obsidian and Melinoe all give them at different points while being uncooperative.
* MediumAwareness: Maybe?
--> '''Mediochre:''' "You’ve got me speaking in ''italics'' woman!"
* MonsterMash: The Dusk.
* MotiveMisidentification: [[spoiler:Sable hasn't been paid to take out Melinoe – she’s investigating a world domination plan which Melinoe is part of.]]
%% * MyRuleFuIsStrongerThanYours: Mediochre to Chrome.
* NightOfTheLivingMooks: The various Undead under [[spoiler:the necromancer’s control]].
* NinjaPirateZombieRobot: Undead [[spoiler:germs]], and later an undead [[spoiler:dragon]].
* NoodleIncident: Who's Samantha Travis?
* NotHyperbole: Joseph to Gambit.
--> '''Joseph:''' Don’t say I didn't warn you.
* NotSoStoic: Dhampinella finally shows some human emotions - when her [[FamilyButton sister]] gets involved.
* NukeEm: Fervour's proposed solution to the BigBad. Or rather, [[spoiler:Reaper 'Em]].
* ObiWanMoment: [[spoiler:Leeroy]] gets a very dignified death scene.
* OhCrap: Everyone gives one when Dhampinella produces the following result for nearby Undead:
--> '''Dhampinella:''' I lose count after seventeen trillion.
* OhNoNotAgain:
--> '''Mediochre:''' Again with the [[DemBones skeletal hordes]]. I ''hate'' the skeletal hordes.
* OnlyOneName: Dante.
* OOCIsSeriousBusiness: ''[[EmotionlessGirl Dhampinella]]'' loses her cool and even ''[[PrecisionFStrike swears mildly]]''.
* OurLichesAreDifferent: Some of them, anyway. It's even noted that the word is ''pronounced'' differently here.
* PaintingTheFourthWall: [[spoiler: The necromancer’s thoughts]] are in a separate font in an attempt to simulate VoiceOfTheLegion.
* PlotCoupon: The [[spoiler:phylacteries]].
* PrecisionFStrike: Dhampinella gives a Precision ''D'' Strike. It works because it's literally the only time she has ''ever'' been anything but tersely polite.
* PreviouslyOn: The plot of Book I is summarised at the start.
%% * PropheticName: The fate of [[spoiler:Prometheus Modern]].
* PsychoLesbian: Guinevere, probably. She could equally be a DepravedBisexual or just a CampStraight SissyVillain with a love of GayBravado.
* PunctuatedForEmphasis:
--> '''Joseph:'''"Where. Is. She?"
* ParentheticalSwearing: Tanner very ''carefully'' measures the way he says "sir" to Fervour.
* PuppetKing: Mediochre believes [[spoiler:Fervour]] may be this.
* PursuedProtagonist: Quill in the opening. [[spoiler:[[DecoyProtagonist He doesn't get very far]].]]
* RedEyesTakeWarning: Because a Vampire is about to eat you. (Also lampshaded with [[spoiler: Leeroy]].)
* TheReveal: Two big ones – the identity of [[spoiler: Purity/Hyde]] and the true nature of [[spoiler: the necromancer]].
* RoomFullOfCrazy: In a variation, Dante has a Room Full Of Impatient.
* RuleOfCool: The main reason given for Joseph's Guns Akimbo moment. Also mentioned in the zontanecrological note.
* SarcasmFailure: Charlotte, in the Edinburgh Kiss's hideout.
* SaveTheVillain: Mediochre saves [[spoiler: Doctor Modern]].
* ShadesOfConflict: Referenced by the title. For the most part, the denizens of the Dusk are [[HeroicNeutral White]], while the Humanist Movement and the Edinburgh Kiss are two opposing types of [[FantasticRacism Black]]. Maccabeus Fervour is [[ObstructiveBureaucrat Grey]] bordering on [[CorruptBureaucrat Black]], with Queen MAB and the main party as ALighterShadeOfGrey. [[spoiler: The necromancer]] is [[EvilOverlord a whole new level of Black]], but we still don't really ''know'' what shade [[NebulousEvilOrganisation The Organisation Which I Represent]] is.
* ShirtlessScene: Mediochre, Melinoe and Joseph each get one. Mediochre's is [[FanDisservice completely non-Fanservicey]] because he's physically fifteen and [[spoiler: being eaten by a worm]] at the time; Melinoe's ''would'' be Fanservicey if she wasn't covered in her own blood at the time (mind you, some people like that...); and Joseph's... well, [[Fanservice the fans deserved something]]...
* ShmuckBait: [[spoiler: The 'Call MIPF' button.]]
* ShootTheDog: As Joseph explains, that's what he's ''for''.
* SlouchOfVillainy: Dante – although he might just be tired.
* SmugSnake: Gambit and Fervour both.
* SomebodySetUpUsTheBomb: Fittingly takes place just after AllYourBaseAreBelongToUs.
* SoulJar: [[spoiler:The necromancer has both his phylacteries.]]
* StealthPun: ''Jacqueline'' Sable is [[spoiler:Purity ''Hyde''. Jacqueline/Hyde. JekyllAndHyde.]]
* StuffedIntoTheFridge: [[spoiler:Shelly.]]
%% * SuddenSequelDeathSyndrome: [[spoiler:Danny.]]
* SwissCheeseSecurity: Mediochre gets in and out of Fervour’s office undetected... somehow.
* TakeAThirdOption: It’s mentioned that both Joseph and Mediochre found third options to an old teacher’s personality test.
* TalkingToThemself: Played for laughs with Joseph's internal dialogue.
* ThanatosGambit: Possibly from [[spoiler: Obsidian]].
* ThickerThanWater: Dhampinella and Melinoe (and, implicitly, their papa.)
* ThouShaltNotKill: Subverted – [[spoiler: Joseph prevents Mediochre killing the necromancer, but only so he can do it]].
* ThrowawayGuns: Joseph when fighting the Vampires – he has no time to re-holster them.
* TitleDrop: Almost. Joseph talks about black, white and shades of ''grey''.
* ToThePain: Gambit tries it.
* TouchOfDeath: [[spoiler:The necromancer]] can do this.
* TransformationIsAFreeAction: Averted. [[spoiler:Millacra's jaw is dislocated because it isn't]].
* TryNotToDie: Joseph says this to Mediochre.
* TyrantTakesTheHelm: [[spoiler:Maccabeus Fervour overthrows the [=MABGov=]]].
* UnusualEuphemism: Mediochre uses "Mother-of-pearl!" as a curse at one point.
* UnstoppableRage: Being [[spoiler:nailed to a wall]] can't stop an angry Mediochre.
%% * UpToEleven: The freezing charm.
* VampireBitesSuck: Sure do.
* VanHelsingHateCrimes: Rather appropriately committed by Zac [[MeaningfulName Abrahams]].
* WakingTheSleepingGiant: Millacra did ''so'' want to remain neutral...
* WhateverHappenedToTheMouse: Chrome just kinda disappears part-way through.
* WhatMeasureIsANonHuman: Charlotte struggles to decide whether [[DemBones Skeletons]] are people.
* WhatTheHellHero: Melz calls Joseph "a damn fool".
* WhatYouAreInTheDark: If you're Joseph Carrion, the answer is "[[MookHorrorShow kinda scary]]"...
%% * WithAllDueRespect: Tanner to Fervour.
%% * XanatosGambit: An impressive one from Zac Abrahams.
%% * YouHaveFailedMe:
%% ** [[spoiler:The necromancer]] to Gambit.
%% ** Obsidian to [[spoiler:Danny]].
%% * YouHaveOutlivedYourUsefulness: Obsidian to [[spoiler:Gambit]].
* YourVampiresSuck: Several lines could function as a TakeThat to Literature/{{Twilight}}.
* YouShallNotPass: [[spoiler:Millacra holds off Tiffany for Joseph and Charlotte]].

[[folder: Caught Mediochre-Handed]]
%% * AbusiveParents: Aoife's parents.
* AdultFear: The Pied Piper and the Scissorman's targeting of children.
* AffablyEvil Simultaneous Velocity Carnage is just as likely to have a casual conversation with you as she is to kill you. Plus, she actually manages to out-snark Mediochre.
* {{Angrish}}: Carnage descends into it when Mediochre tricks her.
* ArchEnemy: Only a year after he finally offed Maelstrom, Mediochre gains another one in Carnage.
* ArsonMurderAndJaywalking: Springheel's rapsheet - thirty-three counts of theft, twenty-two of arson, twenty-five of GBH, at least twenty-nine of rape and eleven of murder. And one hundred and seventy-seven counts of property damage, [[RoofHopping mostly to roofs]].
* AxeCrazy:
** Carnage.
** Springheel.
* BaldOfEvil: Shaven-headed version with Vanadium Steel.
* BatmanGambit: Queen MAB's plan to turn Mediochre against Fervour by getting him to go PapaWolf over Aoife - whom he barely even knew beforehand - is pretty impressive, especially considering ''she wasn't in the country at the time''.
* BeMyValentine: Sort-of inverted. Valentine is sorta romantic on the surface but the real Valentine underneath it all is an asshole.
* BigDamnKiss: Between Mediochre and [[spoiler: Joseph]]. No, it's not what you think. Probably.
* BigDamnVillains: [[spoiler:Mabel Hart]] saves Mediochre from [[spoiler: Vanadium Steel]] and [[spoiler: Springheel Jack]] saves Rowan, Charlotte and Sam from [[spoiler: Thunderbolt Charlie]], both by means of murdering the threat.
* BlatantLies: Mediochre claims his greatest fear is "lecturers" when asked. Not long after, Carnage is asked where Dhampinella is and decides to answer "Munich."
* BlueAndOrangeMorality: Much of Floor Theta, but especially the Scissorman and the Pied Piper.
* BrainwashedAndCrazy: The Piper's children.
* BreakTheHaughty: The fate of [[spoiler:the Choromancer]].
* BrokenMasquerade: Throughout Britain, as the Floor Theta escapees rampage.
* BroughtDownToNormal: The fate of [[spoiler: the Choromancer]].
* TheBrute: The Choromancer is the biggest and most (physically and mantically) powerful of the villains in the book.
* BullyingADragon: Fervour. Even Rising understands that [[spoiler: taking a Dhampir hostage practically counts as assisted suicide]].
%% * CainAndAbel: Valentine and Jonathan Scruff.
* TheCaligula: Fervour turns into this post-breakdown.
* CaptainErsatz: Jonathan Scruff seems to have deliberately modelled himself off Jonathan Crane AKA Scarecrow from Franchise/{{Batman}}.
* CheshireCatGrin: Pretty-much by name.
--> Rowan gave [Charlotte] a grin more befitting of a feline. From Cheshire.
* ChromeChampion: Vanadium Steel, eventually. Deconstructed in that it takes extraordinary conscious effort to hold himself together while moving.
* ColonyDrop: [[spoiler: The Choromancer wants to destabilise the orbit of the moon.]]
* ConfusionFu: Simultaneous Velocity Carnage's main shtick.
* CriticalExistenceFailure: [[spoiler: Thunderbolt Charlie]] and [[spoiler: Springheel Jack]] obliterate each other from existence.
* CruelToBeKind: Mediochre has to trick Valentine into [[spoiler: threatening Charlotte]] to break his spell. A sort of third-person version of BreakHerHeartToSaveHer.
* CurseCutShort: A mild version from Aoife's mother.
--> '''Mrs Silk:''' Yes I'm Mrs blo-
* DamselInDistress: Aoife, thanks to the Scissorman, and later Charlotte and Edith Bartley, courtesy of the Choromancer.
* DanceBattler: The Scruffs.
%% * DisneyVillainDeath: [[spoiler:Jonathan Scruff]].
* DisproportionateRetribution: The Scissorman's MO. This is the case in [[Literature/{{Struwwelpeter}} the original]] as well.
* DopeSlap: Combined with GetAholdOfYourselfMan to snap Charlotte out of her fear-induced hallucination.
* EmotionBomb: Mediochre's main defence against psychomancers turns out to be a mental shell of [[SurvivorGuilt guilt about everyone he's ever watched die]].
* EnemyCivilWar: The escapees. More of them are killed or defeated by each other than are defeated by the heroes.
* EnemyMine: Mediochre and Darrel against the Choromancer, considering it is Mediochre's ultimate goal that ''all'' the escapees go back to prison. Also Mediochre and Valentine against Jonathan, briefly.
* EveryoneCallsHimBarkeep: The Pied Piper, the Scissorman and the Choromancer don't even have names on their prison records.
* ExitVillainStageLeft: Carnelian, with a little help from everyone's favourite tempomancer.
* FamousLastWords: Averted with Fervour, who asked for his last words to go on his memorial. He wanted them to be "Dulce et Decorum est pro Patrium Mori". They end up being much less heroic.
--> '''Fervour:''' [[spoiler: I'll... I'll kill her... don't think I won't... I... aargh!]]
* FateWorseThanDeath: [[BewareTheNiceOnes Mediochre]] threatens the Scissorman with one if he doesn't give in.
* FemmeFatalons: Lark. Pontianak are pretty-much this by default.
* {{Flashback}}: Mediochre goes through multiple, throughout this book.
* ForHappiness: Why Queen MAB goes along with so many cover-ups, apparently. IgnoranceIsBliss, after all.
* FromACertainPointOfView: Weirdly combined with BlatantLies, above. Mediochre claims his fear-induced hallucination was of "a lecturer". As Charlotte points out, [[spoiler: he is a lecturer – and he did indeed see himself]].
* FromTheMouthsOfBabes[=/=]WiseBeyondTheirYears: Aoife gets the odd insightful line.
* GivingSomeoneThePointerFinger: Mediochre does it in the final conference with Chrome et al.
* {{Golem}}: Darrel Snake can make them.
* GoodPowersBadPeople: Valentine is a philiamancer. He literally has the power to [[HeartBeatdown spread love and friendship throughout the world]]. He uses it mostly to enforce his own StalkingIsLove point of view.
* GoodScarsEvilScars: Subverted with Jenny Kirk who, while a bit cold, is a good person, but has a very evil scar.
* GratuitousFrench: Lampshaded by Mediochre, in regards to himself.
* HeartBeatdown: Valentine.
* HeartIsAnAwesomePower: Not so much 'awesome' as '[[NightMareFuel terrifying]]' in Valentine's case.
* HistoricalVillainUpgrade: Does the Pied Piper count?
* HumiliationConga: Given to [[spoiler:the Choromancer]].
* IHaveYourWife: The Choromancer summons Mediochre by kidnapping Charlotte.
--> We have your apprentice. Follow the golem.
* IKnowWhatYouFear: Jonathan Scruff can force people to see their greatest fear via reverse placebo. We don't know whether he is aware of what they see or not.
* InASingleBound: Springheel Jack.
* IronicEchoCut: "Hopefully we’ll find something" cuts immediately to, "So, in short, we've found nothing." Also a GilliganCut.
* KidSidekick: What Pigeon used to be.
* KnifeNut: The Scissorman is obsessed with blades of any form.
* LastSecondChance: Mediochre to the Scissorman.
* LetsGetDangerous: Archie goes from polite old man to literally lightning-fast badass when threatened by Thunderbolt Charlie.
* MagicalFlutist: The Pied Piper, of course.
* ManipulativeBastard: Carnelian rivals the tempomancer himself.
* ManOfWealthAndTaste: Fillip Stephano.
* MayDecemberRomance: Mediochre and Melinda used to be in one of these.
* MeaningfulName: ''Watt''ford. Springheel. Valentine. Bogle. [[UpToEleven Vanadium Steel]] verges on self-parody.
* AMindIsATerribleThingToRead: Mediochre's certainly is. It also appears that using psychomancy on an insane person drives you insane, which is why nobody's tried it on most of the Floor Theta in-mates.
* MindRape: Mediochre manages to basically Mind Rape an attempted Mind Rapist. Also, the Pied Piper's actual criminal charge was "psychological violation".
* MonsterSobStory: Unlike the rest of Floor Theta, Valentine Scruff seems to genuinely not know how much damage he causes and can't work out why all his girlfriends die. Although he ''does'' still keep trying to make new ones, so he's either evil or really not very bright.
* MusicalAssassin: The Pied Piper.
* MyNameIsInigoMontoya: Charlotte tells Stephano who she is in a BadassBoast just before she wallops him.
* TheNeedsOfTheMany: Mediochre's initial decision when given a SadisticChoice – he changes it to ThouShaltNotKill at the last moment.
* NighInvulnerability: Springheel Jack, not that we see him get hit much anyway.
* NoDelaysForTheWicked: Inverted – Fervour is less efficient in everything he tries than Queen MAB was.
* NoMisterBondIExpectYouToDine: Sort-of. Carnage insists on going for coffee with Mediochre.
* NonActionBigBad: Neither Fervour nor [[TheManBehindTheBand Carnelian]] actually fight anyone, but they are responsible for the Stig Unit incident and Floor Theta's escape.
* NoodleIncident: Tanner gave Kirk a nasty scar for some unknown reason. And Samantha Travis is mentioned again.
* NotSoFastBucko: Repeatedly. Eventually Joseph gets frustrated waiting for the adventure to be finally over, basically making this an in-universe example of EndingFatigue.
* OneSteveLimit: Averted with the arrival of Charlotte ‘Thunderbolt Charlie’ Watford.
* OOCIsSeriousBusiness: Tanner is frightened when Fervour manages a whole speech without any [[AltumVidetur Latin]].
* OutGambitted: In a [[UpToEleven notable instance]], Mediochre even managed to out-gambit Carnage, whose sole gambit is '[[IndyPloy not having]] [[ConfusionFu a gambit]]'.
* PostClimaxConfrontation: Hard to tell which confrontation is the climax, but there is almost definitely at least one other confrontation after it, whatever.
* PrecisionFStrike: Charlotte calls Valentine a prick; the first time she's described another person by a vulgar term in the series.
* PsychoLesbian: Thunderbolt Charlie and her girlfriend Carmen are actually pretty level-headed as fictional lesbian criminals go - but when Carmen dies, Charlie ''snaps'' big-time.
* PsychopathicManchild: Springheel Jack sets things on fire because he thinks flames are pretty.
* PunctuatedForEmphasis: Several.
-->'''Mediochre:''' Where. Did. She. Go?
-->'''Mediochre:''' You’re going... to move... [[spoiler: the moon]].
-->'''Barbarossa [=McCullock=]:''' Very. Well.
* TheReasonYouSuckSpeech[=/=]WhatTheHellHero: Queen MAB gives a nice one to Mediochre.
* RememberWhenYouBlewUpASun?: Joseph and Dhampinella list Joseph's accomplishments, some of which we've seen, after Rising attempts to show off.
* ReversePolarity: Possibly a deliberate reference by Mediochre.
* RoofHopping: Springheel Jack. Also the Scruffs, although theirs is less 'hopping' more 'skipping and leaping'.
* SadisticChoice: Given to Mediochre accidentally by Fervour - he can save the Stig Unit or he can prevent the prisoners escaping, but he can't do both.
%% * SealedEvilInACan: Floor Theta.
%% * StalkerWithACrush: Valentine.
* StarterVillain: Fillip Stephano is dealt with easily before Fervour and Floor Theta get involved.
* StealthPun: The code to activate Queen MAB's BrokenMasquerade, if typed on a standard several-letters-per-number mobile phone keypad, can produce the word ‘elflocks’ – something that, according to Creator/WilliamShakespeare, the original [[Theatre/RomeoAndJuliet Queen Mab]] was famous for.
* SwissCheeseSecurity: Parodied. Mediochre gets in and out of Fervour's building without setting off a single alarm – and then sets them ''all'' off. [[RefugeInAudacity In alphabetical order]].
* TakeAThirdOption: Maisie realises this is what Joseph would do if made to choose between [[FriendVersusLover her and Mediochre]].
* TalkingToThemself: [[spoiler: Mediochre is forced to confront his biggest fear, which turns out to be himself]].
* ThoseWhoFightMonsters: Lampshaded – sort of – by Aoife.
* ThouShaltNotKill: Mediochre's eventual decision on the SadisticChoice. Also one of the points the [=MABGov=] refuse to bend unless forced to.
* TitleDrop: The very last line of the story is ''almost'' a TitleDrop.
* TurnsRed: Thunderbolt Charlie suddenly becomes a lot more of a threat [[UnstoppableRage when Carmen dies]].
* TwoHeadedCoin: How Mediochre tricks Simultaneous Velocity Carnage.
%% * TheUnmasquedWorld
* VerbalTic: Tanner theorises Fervour's use of Latin might be one of these.
* VillainousBreakdown: Fervour, after the Stig Unit incident. Carnage when she loses. Thunderbolt Charlie when Carmen dies.
* VillainousBSOD: Subverted. Jonathan Scruff expects this to happen to Carnage, but it doesn't.
* VillainousRescue: Valentine Scruff saves the entire FiveManBand from his brother by [[spoiler: injecting a little narcissistic self-love into Mediochre's private nightmare]].
* WesternTerrorists: Vanadium Steel is a [[TerroristsWithoutACause terrorist-for-hire]] and (apparently) western.
* WhatDoTheyFearEpisode: For most of the core cast, thanks to Jonathan Scruff.
* WhereItAllBegan: The eventual confrontation with the Choromancer takes place back at the ruins of the Stygian Secure Unit.
* WolverineClaws: Springheel has blood iron ones.
* WouldHurtAChild: The Scissorman.

!!The Christmas specials provide examples of:

[[folder: Born to Raise the Sons of Earth (Short Story)]]
* AbnormalAmmo: UpToEleven. The DepletedPhlebotinumShells in Joseph's pistol are said to be abnormal even for him.
* ADayInTheLimelight: It focuses on [[TheLancer Joseph]], rather than [[SupportingProtagonist Charlotte]] or [[TheLeader Mediochre]].
* AscendedExtra: Mad Lex Gunpowder was mentioned exactly once in ''The Good, the Bad and the Mediochre''. Here, he's much more prominent.
* AnAssKickingChristmas: Joseph and Mad Lex Gunpowder spend Christmas Eve and the start of Christmas Day fighting Undead. What's not to love?
* AwesomeAussie: Mad Lex Gunpowder, Joseph's {{Mentor}}, turns out to have been Australian.
* BashBrothers: Joseph and Lex.
* BigBad: Stormhold Elect, Dreadlord Servant of the Thousand Voices.
* BiggerBad: Quite possibly [[spoiler: Stormhold's ''schizophrenia''.]] After all, who else do we know with [[spoiler: necromancer powers and a thousand different 'voices' inside them?]]
* ChekhovsGun: Literally, with Joseph's pistol. Zig-zagged, however, in that [[spoiler: it's not the gun that finally kills Stormhold. Also, of the six bullets, only three are useful and one doesn't even get fired]].
* ChekhovsGunman: On reflection, Stormhold Elect - or rather, [[spoiler: his schizophrenia]] - quite possibly counts as one given the nature of [[spoiler: the necromancer]] in ''Black, White and Shades of Mediochre''.
%% * ChristmasEpisode
* EccentricMentor: Holy crap, ''LEX''.
* EliteMooks: Draugar. Jiang-Shi are more [[{{Mooks}} rank-and-file]].
* EyeScream: Bullets don't kill Draugar. But they ''can'' blind them...
* FutureShadowing: Lex advises Joseph to wear more black. When we first meet him in the series, he's wearing black from head to toe.
* MadScientist: Mad Lex Gunpowder.
* TheMagnificent: [[AwesomeMcCoolname Stormhold Elect]], [[NamesToRunAwayFromReallyFast Dreadlord Servant of the Thousand Voices]].
* NiceHat: Mad Lex wears a [[ Tyrolean]].
* {{Prequel}}: It's set when Joseph is eighteen. He's in the late 20s in the first book.
* PreMortemOneLiner: "Ho ho ho, ya third-grade wombat."
* SavedByTheAwesome: It's stated that Mad Lex's genius is the only reason he hasn't been ''physically incarcerated''.
* SquishyWizard: Stormhold Elect is a pretty good necromancer, but he goes down immediately when Joseph throws a piece of coal at him.
* SeldomSeenSpecies: The fantasy equivalent. How many other stories contain [[ Draugar]] and [[ Jiang-Shi]]?
* TalkativeLoon: Stormhold Elect.
* TeenGenius: Joseph turns out to have been one, which makes sense since he ''is'' a Professor by the time of the main series. Also, Mad Lex Gunpowder earned a doctorate at ''seventeen''. Yeah.
* TitledAfterTheSong: The title is a line from 'Hark, the Herald Angels Sing'. In the song, it refers to Jesus bringing eternal life to human souls. Here, it refers to necromancy.
* TriggerHappy: Mad Lex Gunpowder, although we knew that already. It implies he struggles to ''think'' clearly unless he's shooting at something.
* WoodenKatanasAreEvenBetter: Justified here in that it's ''peachwood'', [[ShownTheirWork which Jiang-Shi are said to be repulsed by]].

[[folder: Please to Put a Penny in the Old Man's Hat (Short Story)]]
* ChristmasEpisode: The second in a row.
* EvilRedhead: Lark is, at least, a pretty scary and unpleasant one.
* FiveFingerDiscount: Pigeon promises in his letter than Mediochre's gift wasn't stolen - although it ''may'' have been bought with money that was "a bit" stolen in the first place.
* GoodThingYouCanHeal: Exploited by Mediochre. He allows Lark to eat bits of him, to prevent her from hunting down innocent humans for food.
* HorrorHunger: Whatever Lark is, she seems to be compelled to eat human meat.
* HurtingHero: Mediochre's damaged mental state is on full display. He even describes ''himself'' as "too introspective" here.
* MementoMacguffin: Turns out that the cross Mediochre wears around his neck was [[ItWasAGift a gift]] from [[ILetGwenStacyDie Pigeon]].
* PublicDomainCharacter: Mediochre is in London to find Springheel Jack, the famous UrbanLegend.
* SmallStepsHero: This story shows Mediochre to be one.
* TitledAfterTheSong: Specifically, after a line from "Christmas is Coming", a traditional British Christmas carol.
* TragicKeepsake: This is probably why Mediochre is still wearing that cross, many years after Pigeon's death.
* VictorianLondon: The entire story is a flashback to the Victorian era. So, naturally, it ''has'' to take place in London!

[[folder: A Visit from the Yule Goat (Poem)]]
* BadSanta: The "Saint Nick" turns out to be a goat-like monster using a disguise to sneak into people's houses and plant eggs which will eventually hatch into murderous babies.
%% * ChristmasEpisode
* EnfantTerrible: The Yule goat's species doesn't appear to be sapient enough for true evil, but it ''does'' have a life cycle that involves the babies taking the form of the first creature they see and then, uh, disposing of the original.
* KillAndReplace: Part of the natural life cycle of the titular "Yule goat".
%% * LooseCanon
* MasterOfIllusion: The Yule goat, due to natural iconomancy.
* MonsterIsAMommy: In fact, that's part of what makes it so monstrous.
* MultiArmedAndDangerous: The Yule goat. Four of them were disguised as a belly when it was pretending to be Santa.
* WholePlotReference: A twisted one to ''A Visit from St Nicholas'' (''Literature/TwasTheNightBeforeChristmas''...)

[[folder: To You And Your Kin (Short Story)]]
* BigGuyLittleGuy: Orcus and Vitus, respectively.
* ChristmasEpisode: The third official Mediochreverse "Christmas special".
* CoolCar: Kind-of subverted. Demetrius owns a classic 1952 Rolls-Royce Silver Wraith - but it's almost certainly just for the name.
* CreepyChild: Dhampinella, aged ten.
* DumbMuscle: Orcus. According to Melinoe, he's "dumb as a sack of concrete".
* EmotionlessGirl: Dhampinella, even moreso than usual.
* EvilVersusEvil: Demetrius vs the Chlodoveches.
* ExpositoryHairstyleChange: As a child, Dhampinella has long hair and a demure EmotionlessGirl personality, in contrast to her adult self's BoyishShortHair and stoic badass personality.
* FlashbackToCatchphrase: The story ends with Dhampinella and Melinoe referring to each other as 'outcast' and 'link' for the first time.
* HalfBreedDiscrimination: The Chlodoveches like the half-human Dhampinella even less that they like her father.
* LastNameBasis: Demtrius prefers to use his last name (which is all the main book series ever calls him). Turns out, he does have a first name, and it's Albin.
* MeaningfulName: Melinoe's Viscountess mother is named Erzsébet - also the real name of the historical [[ Countess Elizabeth Bathory]], a notoriously blood-obsessed serial killer.
* NouveauRiche: Demetrius, in contrast to the more traditional but less smarmy OldMoney Chlodovech family.
* OlderThanTheyLook: Dhampinella was ten years old in 1983, making her somewhat older than Joseph. In fairness, she's not human.
* OldMoney: The Chlodovech family.
* OppositesAttract[=/=]OddFriendship: Melinoe and Dhampinella, due to being raised by an OldMoney crime family and a NouveauRiche "modern" gangster, respectively.
* ParentalNeglect: Dhampinella and Melinoe bond over their shared experiences of crappy parenting.
* TheQuietOne: Dhampinella was this anyway, but it turns out she was worse as a child. She has exactly one spoken line in the entire story. Oddly, Melinoe is apparently good enough at reading whatever signals Dhampinella does give off to continue the conversation, leading to something like a NewhartPhonecall between two people who are both in the same room.
* SpiritedYoungLady[=/=]RebelliousPrincess: Melinoe may enjoy being a Vampire, but what she enjoys more is breaking tradition to annoy her mother.
* SunglassesAtNight: Demetrius keeps his sunglasses on inside. [[spoiler: It's because he intends to set off a light charm if things don't go his way]].
* TeleportSpam: Vitus is so twitchy he can't ''help'' doing this. He uses it to his advantage when he fights.
* TitledAfterTheSong: Named for a line in 'We Wish You a Merry Christmas'. The full phrase is "Good tidings we bring[=/=]To you and your kin", making this an ironic CompleteTheQuoteTitle, since the tidings brought between the two families are ''far'' from good.
* ThoseTwoBadGuys: The Viscountess uses her brother Vitus and her broodchild Orcus as henchmen.
* WomanScorned: The Viscountess ''really'' does not like her ex-husband.