Identical teams\\
Of funny mercenaries\\
Battle to the death

''[[AC:The Scout]]''\\
Small and annoying\\
This Boston brat runs quickly\\
Someone shut him up

''[[AC:The Soldier]]''\\
Square jawed and crew-cut\\
No grip on reality\\
Bona-fide batshit

''[[AC:The Pyro]]''\\
Mumbling though gas mask\\
Asbestos-clad enigma\\
Sets people on fire

''[[AC:The Demoman]]''\\
Black Scottish Cyclops\\
Makes people explode a lot\\
Chugs scrumpy--KA-BEEEEWM

''[[AC:The Heavy]]''\\
Giant Russian man\\
Says your whole team is babies\\
Talks to food and guns

''[[AC:The Engineer]]''\\
Quiet Texas guy\\
Builds stuff to aid defenses\\
Answer? Use more gun

''[[AC:The Medic]]''\\
Call for the doctor\\
He may come heal you, or not\\
Hurting is more fun

''[[AC:The Sniper]]''\\
Lone-wolf Aussie bloke\\
Pops heads, calls others wankers\\
Weird issues with pee

''[[AC:The Spy]]''\\
Dastardly French spy\\
Seeks new people to backstab\\
He's not on your side

''[[AC:The Administrator]]''\\
Angry chain smoker\\
Yells at always-fighting clones\\
Don't cross the lady

It doesn't matter\\
As to who wins or loses\\
Eternal stalemate
-->-[[{{Tropers/Stealth}} Stealth]]

-->[[{{Tropers/LNERfan}} LNER fan]]

I just got ubered.\\
Now is a good time to run.\\

An electronic chirp.\\
Explosion of viscera.\\
The Scottish laughs fall.

Battle of two teams,\\
But who cares about the fight?\\
It's about the hats.

Ten seconds full crits for fire\\
Pro raging ensues\\

-->[[{{Tropers/FameTV}} N]]

Some guys with red clothes\\
Fight with some guys with blue clothes\\
And they all have hats.
-->The Mike

Your teammates are dead\\
Heavy and Medic draw near\\
Swiftly comes your fate.

Mad doctor cackles.\\
Angry fat Russian fires gun.\\
Fighter's worst nightmare.

Baby face blaster.\\
Who needs jumping? Not this Scout.\\
Hit-and-run is fun.

Rescue Ranger? Meh.\\
I'd rather have my shotgun.\\
My buildings are fine.

Cold weapon protects\\
Warmth is a lesser threat now\\
I still hate pyros

Set on fire, then smack\\
enemy for melee crit.\\
Overpowered? No.

Archimedes, no!\\
Get out of that man's rib-cage!\\
Sorry about that.

[[WMG:In-game haiku:]]

''[[AC:Killer's Kabuto]]''\\
A haiku for war.\\
To defeat one's enemies.\\
Honor the crocket.

''[[AC:Fan O'War]]''\\
Winds of Gravel Pit\\
Scout brings on his deadly fan!\\
You are marked for death

With buff, some damage\\
Dished out by nearby teammates\\
Comes back as healing

Soldiers and Demos\\
Can duel with katanas\\
For a one-hit kill

''[[AC:Conniver's Kunai]]''\\
Start off with low health\\
Kill somebody with this knife\\
Steal all of their health

One-eyed scottish drunk\\
Dons his helmet for battle\\
Blacks out, misses war

''[[AC:Dread Knot]]''\\
Crybabies cower\\
At the approach of fat man\\
With terrible hair

''[[AC:Geisha Boy]]''\\
Frog leaps into pond\\
Lotus blossoms fall to earth\\
Medic has girl's hair

''[[AC:Noh Mercy]]''\\
Chain-smoking Frenchman\\
Skulks in shadows, then attacks\\
Terrifying mask