Lindsey: "So raise your hand if you think that was a Russian water-tentacle."
When Coffey steals One Night's sub, and the music starts to play. He totally smashes the sucker! Harsh, but funny.
Bud and Lindsey's squabbling is usually always good for a chuckle or two.
Personally I laughed my head off when Catfish wakes up and sees the water-tentacle. He freaks out and grabs a FREAKIN POTTED PLANT!! HILARIOUS!
Lindsey is trying to convince the crew that she isn't crazy and that she actually saw something out in the ocean. The only person who believes her is Hippie, who immediately dives headfirst into a Conspiracy Kitchen Sink. Lindsey's reply: "Stop Helping Me!!"
Bud at the beginning of the film: "Yeah, I'm calm, I'm a calm guy, why shouldn't I be calm? Is there a reason for me to not be calm?" *someone on the other end mentions his soon-to-be-ex wife's imminent arrival on the rig* "WHAAAAT?!"
Hippie commenting on Lindsey's decision to call the aliens a "non-terrestrial intelligence".
Hippie: NTIs. Oh, man, that's even better than UFOs! Though I guess that works, too, huh? "Underwater flying objects"!
Bud after meeting the NTI's in person, they saved his life and he shows his thanks by vomiting on their floor. Granted he was taking the liquid breathing apparatus off, but it still comes across as unintentionally funny.