Funny / Signs
So they don't read our minds.
- Bo: "There's a monster outside my room, can I have a glass of water?"
- And Bo doesn't want the glass in her table because it tastes like an old woman.
- Graham and his dog Isabel have this "exchange".
Graham: Isabel, you are going to feel very silly when this turns out to be make-believe.
- When the "Wolfington Brothers" return.
Merrill: We're gonna beat your ass, bitch! We're gonna tear your head off!
Graham: I'm losing my mind!...It's time for an ass-whupping!
Graham: ...I cursed.
Merrill: I heard. How did he get... (looks to the roof) Are you sure this is Lionel Prichard?
- Graham and Merrill try to give the local sheriff a description of the "person" they chased around their house.
Sheriff: Ok, so far all I have is 'It was very dark'.
Graham: Yes, yes it was.
Sheriff: I don't know whether to look for a giant or a midget.
Graham: No, he definitely wasn't a midget.
Sheriff: So, how tall was he? Six feet or even taller?
Merrill: It was very dark.
- Merrill tries talking to his television set.
Merrill: Move, children. Vamanos!
- This exchange during their supposed last dinner together.
"I hate you, dad."
- During emotional crying scene afterwards when the family literally group hugs together Graham drags Merrill from his seat making him join in. The look on Joaquin's face when he was grabbed was like he didn't see that coming.
- Graham gives one of the least convincing imitations of a police officer to the alien trapped in the pantry.
Graham: The police are here. I am with them. I am a police officer. I just want to talk with you. We know all about the hoax. We already took some of your friends downtown in the paddy wagon.
- Graham muttering "paddy wagon?" to himself in exasperation right after is the icing on the cake.
- Bo and her water fixation.
Graham: Come on, now, you're too old to be doing this. You get a glass of water, and leave it lying around instead of finishing it. Now what's wrong with this one?
Bo: It has dust in it.
Graham: And this one?
Bo: A hair.
Graham: And this one?
Bo: Morgan took a sip and it has his amoebas in it.
- Dr. Bimbu! The author of the book about extraterrestrials that Morgan bought from the bookshop.
"I think that's enough from Dr. Bimbu."
- The Spanish dub has him named as Dr. Bobo.
- Graham remarking that the whole family needs to "calm down...eat some fruit or something."
- Merrill finishes sandbagging the coal chute, slumps against the bags and slides down to the ground, sits there for a moment... then grabs the tin can next to him, quickly puts it on top of the pile, and sits back down.
- The whole confession of the pharmacist even though Graham states that he is not a reverend anymore.
- Then there is the customer behind Graham who pokes his head.
- Anytime the children are wearing their little psychic-repelling hats.
- Made even better when Merrill dons one as pictured above.
- And even better because they are seen through the eyes of Graham, acting as a Straight Man.
- The old bookshop owner who believed the news coverage of the crop circles was just an excuse to show soda commercials.
- After Morgan unsuccesfully tries to use the tape of Bo's ballet recital to record the news "for science", he instead uses uncle Merrill's favourite tape: Swimsuit Special.
- Merrill "explaining" the Crop Circles as a hoax.
"Morgan, this crop stuff is just about a bunch of nerds who never had a girlfriend their whole lives. They're like thirty now. They make up secret codes and analyze Greek mythology and make secret societies where other guys who never had girlfriends can join in. They do stupid crap like this to feel special. It's a scam. Nerds were doin' it twenty five years ago and new nerds are doing it again."