- Crowning Moment of Funny - Too damn many.
- The Commissioner confusing a retard with a zombie when a Special Education school visits the NYBT, with disastrous results.
- After a long talk with the Japanese prime minister (the Japanese have begun to combat their zombies)... "I have no idea what he said".
- In-Universe: A Tastes Like Diabetes hand-puppet show for kids being interrupted by a news report graphically describe people being eaten by zombies... trying to dumb it down... until she's forced to report about christmas gifts. Then she curses at her boss for screwing up the broadcast... still live.
- One in the manual:
"You could be out there killing zombies, but I know you're not up for that. Oh, no. How do I know? Because you're wasting time reading the fricking manual instead of killing zombies!!!"