- The "love song" that Edgar produces for Miles to present to Madeline, consisting of strings of sexual obscenities to the tune of a soapy commercial jingle.
Darling I love you to bitsAnd I want to see your titsMiles: (reading the lyrics) I can't play that for her! "I want to squeeze you, lick you, pucker up and kiss you"? You make her sound like a lemon!
- During the Naked People Are Funny segment:
Madeline: Oh, Miles, Do you have a dog?Miles: Do why do you say that...? Oh, the barking? That's the neighbor's dog. It barks all the time through the wall!Madeline: (indicating puddle on floor, laughing) Does it pee through the wall as well?