* Valvert tries to insult Cyrano, telling him "Sir, your nose is. . .hmm. . .it is. . .very big!", (something that he's very sensitive to). Cyrano calmly responds that it is, but this insult was lousy, and proceeds to tell a LongList of better insults in many different styles. Then fights a duel with him, while improvising a ballad.
* The truly bizarre and hilarious scene where Cyrano provides a distraction by jumping out of a tree and claiming to have fallen from the moon.
* Cyrano is telling the story of how he duelled a hundred men the night before, is interrupted by Christian, who's taken the hazing bet of the other Gascons and is full pf puns about Cyrano's nose - even though mentioning anything nose related in Cyrano's presence is extremely unwise. Incensed, Cyrano asks who Christian is, ready to gut him - only to find out that he's the man Roxanne loves, and who he's sworn to look out for. Awkward. He goes back to his tale, but Christian keeps interrupting...
** Taken UpToEleven in the Jose Ferrer version. Christian says the fatal word, causing a stunned silence:
-->'''Cyrano:''' ''[[TranquilFury "...Who]]'' [[TranquilFury is that...]]''[[TranquilFury man]]'' [[TranquilFury there?"]]
* After winning a bet, Cyrano has two musicians following him around all day. He uses them as sentries by telling them to wait at the end of the street and play a jolly air if a woman aproaches or a sad one if it's a man. Naturally, the first time it happens they play both.
--> Is it a man? A woman? ... It's a monk.