History Funny / ConanTheBarbarian1982

* [[FunnyBackgroundEvent Whenever Doom is about to do his magic]], Thorgrim seems to get an uncomfortable look on his face and spends about half the time shuffling and staring at the ground; one gets the impression that this is the guy who joined for the orgies and the pillaging, not for the hypnotizing and shooting snakes at people...

* When Conan meets the Wolf Witch, he learns that she has information about the Children of Doom, but that "there is a price." Cut to the next scene, where Conan is on top of the Wolf Witch screwing her brains out. Somehow, I don't think that Conan took much convincing. This scene is even funnier if you've got the director's commentary on, as Arnold dryly comments "Conan scores a lot in this movie."

** Akin to this, it's hilarious how the priest is blatantly hitting on Conan is pleasantly surprised when Conan wants to take him to where the other penitents can't see them.

** Particularly his BigDamnHeroes moment where he saves Subotai by taking down Doom's last rider. The dazed look and bewildered tone in his voice make it obvious that he can't believe he survived it:
--->'''Akiro:''' "I-- I did it! With my SPEAR! ''A-HAAA!''"

* [[FunnyBackgroundEvent When you look closely enough at the background]], in Conan's pitfight scenes, there's always the same preteen kid who's ''very'' enthusiastic about being taken to the fights. And he's there for like every single Conan fight, always with the same enthusiasm as the first time, so he's clearly enjoying himself immensely.

* After having gained a reputation as a gladiator, Conan is brought to the East to get taught by expert swordmasters. We see in the middle of a lesson, performing sword moves. The stern master jumps in, slaps Conan and disaprovingly yells at him. Afterwards another student looks at Conan with a mocking grin in his face. How does the old master react? [[GroinAttack with a spectacular kick to the groin, of course!]] In the commentary Arnold Schwarzenegger and John Milius are thoroughly amused by this moment.

-->'''Arnold:''' He was laughinhg! He wasn't laughing long!

* After having gained a reputation as a gladiator, Conan is brought to the East to get taught by expert swordmasters. We see in the middle of a lesson, performing sword moves. The stern master jumps in, slaps Conan and disaprovingly yells at him. Afterwards another student looks at Conan with a mocking grin in his face. How does the old master react? [[GroinAttack with a spectacular kick to the groin, of course!]]

* During a the battle of the mounds, Subotai runs out of arrows and is about to be attacked by two of the riders. In desperation he ''pretends'' to draw his bow, and the riders react so scared that they both fall off their horses. The yell of amazement at such a stupid stunt actually working that Subotai gives is simply priceless!

* Immediately after an epic montage of Conan and his gang becoming legendary outlaws, Conan passes out drunk into his oatmeal.

* Conan's ridiculously nonchalant and somewhat half-assed attempt to infiltrate Doom's cult. Especially when, in a ploy to nab a priests garb, he gets the man on his own by claiming that he is "afraid and shy".

* During a the battle of the mounds, Subotai runs out of arrows and is about to be attacked by two of the riders. In desperation he :pretends: to draw his bow, and the riders react so scared that they both fall off their horses. The yell of amazement at such a stupid stunt actually working that Subotai gives is simply priceless!