[[quoteright:350:http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/crank.jpg]]
-> ''"Fuck you, Chelios!"''

A hitman named Chev Chelios (Creator/JasonStatham) has been injected with a slow-acting poison that will eventually cause his body to shut down. His doctor is far away and his flight was delayed. If he runs out of adrenaline, he will die.

''Crank'' is a 2006 action film where Jason Statham kicks everyone's ass. Followed by a sequel, ''Crank: High Voltage'', in 2009. After the events of the first movie, Chev pursues his heart, which has been literally stolen by Chinese gangsters. He must electrocute himself to charge his artificial heart and prevent himself from dying. HilarityEnsues.

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!!Both movies have examples of:

* AnythingThatMoves: In ''Crank 2'', it is heavily implied that Eve wants to have sex with a horse.
* AutoErotica
* BadAss: Chev. Not surprising, since he's Creator/JasonStatham.
* BaldOfAwesome: Chev. Not surprising, since he's ... ah, you know.
* BlackAndGrayMorality: Chelios himself is not a saintly protagonist, but the people he's up against are much worse. Borders on EvilVsEvil in ''High Voltage'', though.
* BlackComedy: A PERFECT example would be in the second movie, where an innocent bystander from the first movie gets therapy; [[spoiler: cue ricocheting bullet hitting him in the head and [[VomitIndiscretionShot his therapist puking her guts out into a garbage can.]]]]
* BreakingTheFourthWall: A scene in the first movie has Chev reading the on-screen subtitles. In the second movie, he whistles along with the soundtrack early on and [[spoiler:gives a middle finger to the audience during the ending.]]
* TheCameo:
** [[Music/LinkinPark Chester Bennington]] shows up a few times. The first of which is in the original movie, where he suggests the acquisition of epinephrine in order for Chev to stave off the poison.
** Ron Jeremy and a whole group of porn stars in the second movie. Made even funnier when you hear in an [[http://www.earwolf.com/episode/directors-edition-crank/ interview]] with Brian Taylor that they never intended for Ron Jeremy to be in the movie, he just found out about it and showed up.
** [[Creator/{{Troma}} Lloyd Kaufman]]
** [[Music/{{Tool}} Maynard James Keenan]]. He's walking the dog in the second movie.
** [[Music/SpiceGirls Geri Halliwell]] (formerly known as Ginger Spice).
** [[Series/StarTrekTheNextGeneration John de Lancie]]
* ClusterFBomb: '''FUCK YOU, CHELIOS!''' Even turns into a ''montage'' in the middle of the sequel.
* CombatPragmatist: Chev prefers to simply beat everyone to death if he isn't in direct possession of a gun.
** He also takes pretty much every gun off of everyone he kills. Any time he kills someone with a better or just plain ''different'' gun, he picks it up and uses it to kill the next guy.
* {{Determinator}}: Chelios is the living embodiment of determination. He not only displays new levels of {{badass}}ery with absolutely every move he does, he does it while poison is slowly killing his body or when his heart has been taken out.
* DoomedProtagonist: [[spoiler:Subverted to hell and back.]]
* DeusSexMachina: Chelios' problems can be solved momentarily by screwing or rubbing on little old ladies.
* {{Fanservice}}: The movies basically push the R rating as absolutely far as it will go, in terms of nudity and sex as well as profanity and violence.
* FightingWithChucks: Venus in the sequel.
* FunWithSubtitles
* {{Gorn}}
* GroinAttack: Several.
* {{Homage}}: The whole series is basically one long video game.
* HumiliationConga: While Chev is already a ButtMonkey for most of what he goes through, each movie tends to contain at least one segment where he has to stop being badass for awhile and just do some flat-out ''embarrassing'' things to stay alive.
* {{Jerkass}}: Chev Chelios, in both movies - although occasional, fairly feeble attempts are made at portraying him as a JerkWithAHeartOfGold, he seems by turns either genuinely uncaring or vaguely amused by much of the havoc he causes.
** To make up for it, pretty much everyone he's up against also embodies this trope.
** It's also thoroughly lampshaded in the second movie with a huge segment of "Fuck you, Chelios!" flashbacks going all the way back to his childhood, in which he's on a Maury-like show getting yelled at for being a little shit.
* KavorkaMan: Chev's doctor is an old man with a hot girlfriend.
* LivingOnBorrowedTime
* MadeOfIron: Chev Chelios, in both movies.
** In the second movie, it is explicitly stated that his nigh-indestructibility is the reason why various people are interested in [[spoiler: his organs. More specifically, one very special one...]]
** Lampshaded by the second film's promotional tagline: "Anyone else would be ''so'' dead by now..."
** And the Chinese prostitute, who [[spoiler: gets hit by a car and survives]].
* MakingLoveInAllTheWrongPlaces: In both movies, Cheelios and his girlfriend have sex in public to keep him alive.
* MemeticBadass: Chev appears to be one of these in-universe, to judge from the other characters' reactions to him. On the down side, that's exactly the reason why the Triads stole his heart in the first place.
* NoOneCouldSurviveThat: Arguably [[spoiler:the endings of both movies. The fact that Ricky Verona survived... [[BrainInAJar um, sort of]]]] would probably also count.
* PetTheDog: Chev's behavior toward his girlfriend, Eve, and arguably the doctor.
* PhraseCatcher: "Fuck you, Chelios!"
* ProductPlacement: Google Maps is used during transitions on occasion.
* ProfessionalKiller: Chelios' job.
* RasputinianDeath: Chelios... twice.
* RatedMForManly: As a review on {{Website/Cracked}} puts it: "If you piled all the guns in the world on one side of a room and Crank on the other, Crank would still be the manliest thing in the room."
* RuleOfCool: Very, very little in either film makes any sense, or has any kind of genuine believability. Fortunately, it doesn't need any, either.
* SequelHook: In the first movie, where [[spoiler:Chelios [[EyeAwaken opens his eyes]] after seemingly have died for the eleventieth time]], and in the second movie, where [[spoiler: he does it again]].
* ThrowAwayGuns: Chelios acts like an FPS protagonist, dropping guns and swapping them for whatever dead mooks are carrying when his current weapon runs dry.
* VillainProtagonist: Played with, Chelios is a hitman, but his villainy is donwplayed in the context of the movies.
* WhyWontYouDie
* WillingSuspensionOfDisbelief: And you're going to ''need it'' for both movies.

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!!''Crank'' has examples of:
* BulletproofHumanShield: Chev Chelios uses his friend's dead body as a shield.
* ClothingDamage: Chev accidentally rips Eve's dress just before they [[CoitusEnsues have in sex in Chinatown]], which has the [[RuleOfSexy convenient]] effect of making her outfit much more {{Stripperiffic}} for the rest of the film.
* DisneyVillainDeath: Played with. [[spoiler:Both Chelios and Verona fall out of a helicopter. Subverted for Verona, since Chelios snaps his neck in mid-fall. Also subverted with Chelios himself, since [[UnexplainedRecovery he gets better]] in the second film.]]
* EurekaMoment: Early, Chev remembers how his heart felt better when he smashed the tv and sped in his car (raising his adrenaline).
-->''I'm gonna have to kick some black ass.''
* IronicEcho: "Experiencing a little twenty-twenty hindsight right about now, ain't ya?"
* JumpingOnAGrenade: One of the [[BigBad bad guys]] uses his bodyguard to save himself from the blast. The bodyguard sees this as an honor, maybe because he didn't notice the grenade and probably thought his boss pushed him down to keep him from becoming a bullet sponge.
* TheLastDance
* NoodleIncident: Much of the dialogue implies that it's not the first time Chev went into an adrenaline fueled rampage. Special mention goes to his coke dealer Orlando implying that it's not the first time Chev fought with his gang on a coke rage.
--> '''Chev:''' I know what I'm have to do.
--> '''Orlando:''' I'm going to have to kick some black ass.
--> *Fight ensues.*
--> '''Orlando:''' [[OhNoNotAgain Not again.]]
* UnreliableNarrator: The creators mention in the commentary for the first film that everything that happens after Chev drinks the "plant shit" drug may not have actually happened, at least not the way the viewer sees it.
* YourMimeMakesItReal: [[SubvertedTrope Subverted]] during the final confrontation. Chevy "fires" a FingerGun to one of his enemies lackeys, only for the guy to get a BoomHeadshot. Turns out TheCavalry has arrived (one of them shot the guy) and are helping him because of an EnemyMine situation.


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!!''Crank: High Voltage'' has examples of:

* ActionGirl: Eve has a moment of this.
* AndShowItToYou: A rare survivor's example, when Chelios revives in time to see his original heart being removed.
* AssShove: [[spoiler:Crosses into JackBauerInterrogationTechnique]] at the beginning.
* BackFromTheDead: Chelios. Several people openly comment on this.
* BackupTwin: Venus.
* BigDamnHeroes: [[spoiler: An army of transsexuals called in by Venus and strippers by the Asian hooker save Chelios' ass.]]
* BlackComedy: The movie is entirely made out of this and intentionally offensive stereotypes.
* ContinuityNod: The first time Chev points his finger like a gun at someone's head and a bullethole appears, it had been planned out beforehand. When it happens again in the sequel, he stares at his hand with an expression that clearly says 'What the hell? It's happening on its own now?'
* CountryMatters: Chelios screams at a man: "MASSIVE HOMO CUNT!"
* CrouchingMoronHiddenBadass: Venus. "[[YouKilledMyFather You killed my brother]], motherfucker. {{Prepare|ToDie}} [[ShoutOut to]] [[Film/ThePrincessBride die]]."
* EurekaMoment: Eve has one, complete with [[IdeaBulb a graphic of a lightbulb]] appearing next to her head.
* DirtyOldMan: Poon Dong.
* DisposableSexWorker: Played with: Chev (unintentionally) saves Ria from becoming one.
** Played a bit more straight in the final battle: [[spoiler:an army of prostitutes called by Ria and Venus gun down the various mooks, including a few hapless naked women and some of the prostitutes themselves.]]
** A few strippers also die in the second action scene.
* EnfantTerrible: It's revealed that Chelios himself had been beating up a kid with a trash can when he was young.
* FaceHeelTurn: [[spoiler: Don Kim is spared by Chev in the first movie and comes to his aid in the climax, but by the second movie he tries to cash in on a bounty on Chev.]]
* HandCannon: The number of Desert Eagles used is close to insane.
* HeyItsThatGuy: InUniverse example, one of the characters notes that Chelios looks like "that guy in the Transporter movies."
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%% Other non In-Universe examples belong in Trivia/Crank.
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* HilariousOuttakes:
--> '''Statham''': "I take it you're the faggot who's been hunting me all day?... (reads line) I'm sorry, the ''Ferret''..."
* HilarityEnsues: While the first movie is (somewhat) sane, the second one is so ridiculously over the top that it qualifies as comedy gold.
* HollywoodTourettes: Subverted. Venus, who claims to have "full-body Tourette's" gets periodic full-body convulsions (in line with a very severe motor tic), but swears significantly less than the healthy but foul-mouthed Chelios.
* ItsPersonal: Parodied with the transsexual's brother.
* KnightInShiningArmor: Ria mistakes Chev as hers, says as much, and ''immediately'' develops a full-blown BodyguardCrush on him.
--> "You need me like Whitney Houston!"

* LosingYourHead/[[spoiler:BrainInAJar]]: [[spoiler:Ricky Verona.]]
* LostInTranslation: The {{Mook}} with [[AssShove the shotgun stuck up his ass]] is supremely confused when Chev asks what happened to his "Strawberry tart".
* LyricalDissonance: REO Speedwagon's "Keep On Loving You" is played as Chelios literally burns to a crisp.
* {{MacGuffin}}: Johnny Vang's red cooler [[spoiler: until we find out it [[MockGuffin doesn't actually hold Chelios' heart]] and instead has something so disturbing that Chev looks at Johnny and says sincerely, "I am shocked to my core. You've got some deep problems, motherfucker."]]
* ManOnFire: [[spoiler:Chev.]]
* MediumAwareness (/ BreakingTheFourthWall): Following his gunfight escape, Chev casually walks up to the last mook standing... ''whistling his own theme song''.
* MightyWhiteyAndMellowYellow: Bai Ling's character (Ria) is determined to fulfill this trope after Chev ''accidentally'' saves her from a bad guy. Chev's lack of interest in her doesn't seem to matter.
--> "He my Kevin Costner!"
* MST3KMantra: '''Invoked''' in-universe. A news reporter (de Lancie) comments on the implausibility of someone ([[spoiler:Verona]]) falling from the sky randomly being "bullshit". His words.
* NotIfTheyEnjoyedItRationalization: His girlfriend wasn't exactly willing with the public sex at first... and promptly developed a fetish for it in the second movie.
* NowItsMyTurn: Chev's electric heart starts running out when a bunch of cops hogpile on him... then [[ContrivedCoincidence one of them brings out a stun gun.]]
* OneManArmy: About 5 seconds after entering a whore house full of gangsters, every last one is tossed out a window or through a wall where a window isn't available.
* ProductPlacement: Of all things, ''the heart''. Chev's artificial heart is an ''actual thing'', and they used the real name and company. They changed it up a bit for the movie, obviously (the real one doesn't have external batteries, but does have recharger ports), but the fact that it survives all the crap Chev puts it through and comes out whole at the end could be considered the ultimate (albeit ''heavily'' fictionalized) endorsement.
* RedHerring: [[spoiler:Johhny Vang's cooler.]]
* RefugeInAudacity
* ShoutOut:
** There's a random [[Franchise/{{Godzilla}} giant rubber monster movie]] segment at one point .
** The Chinese hooker calls Chev [[TheBodyguard "her Kevin Costner" and says she'll be "like Whitney Houston."]]
* UnexplainedRecovery: Chelios. One of the taglines is actually "He was dead... but he got better"
* TheUnreveal: "What kind of sick freak carries something like ''that'' around in a box?"
* VomitIndiscretionShot: We get the lovely scene of a woman puking directly onto the camera.
* WhatHappenedToTheMouse: What the hell was in [[spoiler:Johnny Vang's cooler?]] It's probably for the best that no one found out...
* [[WouldntHitAGirl Wouldn't Shoot a Girl]]: Chev has little problem beating the shit out of and possibly killing cops, but merely threatens the lone female cop to make her keep her distance while he's recharging/escaping. The only time he actually does injury to a female is completely by accident, [[spoiler: when he sets the Asian hooker on fire by hugging her while hallucinating... um, and on fire]].
* YellowFace: David Carradine as [[PunnyName Poon Dong]].
* YourMimeMakesItReal: Chev points his finger and a guy's head explodes... although this time there's no [[TheCavalry cavalry]] providing support. The dumbfounded expression on Chev's face shows this came as a surprise to him too.
* YourPrincessIsInAnotherCastle: "This is not my fucking pumper!"

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