''Franchise/HarryPotter'' humor FanFic (see [[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2179136/1/How_Hogwarts_Became_a_Nudist_Colony here]]) authored by [[http://www.fanfiction.net/u/417305/Slinky-and-the-BloodyWands Slinky-and-the-BloodyWands]].

After spending two weeks battling Voldemort, Harry returns to Hogwarts only to find, as the title suggests, that it's a nudist colony now. Additionally, the school houses have been abolished and Draco Malfoy is now quite chummy with the ex-Gryffindors. Harry is understandably outraged and immediately takes on the OnlySaneMan role as Dumbledore cheerfully [[HowWeGotHere explains what happened while Harry was away]]. As it turns out, the situation arose from a nude protest Hermione made for house-elf rights.

Can be differentiated from ''Hogwarts Exposed'' by the fact that it runs on RuleOfFunny. The author created [[http://www.fanart-central.net/pic-384846.html two]] [[http://www.fanart-central.net/pic-384856.html illustrations]] for the story.


* BoldInflation: Standard [[Music/KanyeWest caps-lock key equating to loudness]]. Lampshaded.
-->'''Draco:''' ''Oh, here comes 'caps-lock Harry'. So predictable.''
* EverybodyHasLotsOfSex: Yes, yes, they do. After Hogwarts goes nudist, it quickly turns into a free-love commune. The sex is not really shown, however, and is mostly just implied.
* DracoInLeatherPants: Played with. Draco is portrayed as your standard fanon!Draco. However, Draco not being his canon self is one of the things OnlySaneMan Harry is enraged about. [[invoked]]
* FelonyMisdemeanor: At one point after going nudist, Hermione tells a lie to Professor [=McGonagall=]. When the narrative returns to the present, Dumbledore, Ron, and Draco act surprised that Harry isn't more outraged about Hermione lying to a teacher.
-->''Harry did indeed look amazed. "I'm at a bloody school filled with bloody nudists, and my friend telling a lie—the same friend who started this bloody nudist rally for house elf rights—is suppose to shock and amaze me?! I'm way past SHOCK AND AMAZEMENT right now, thank you very much, straight-Malfoy!"''
* FramingDevice: Dumbledore tells Harry the story of how... well, read the title.
* FreudianExcuse: Voldemort is evil because [[spoiler:he's allergic to chocolate]].
* GirlOnGirlIsHot: Ron and Draco think so when Ginny and Pansy get into a naked (of course) CatFight. When Harry asks [[BrotherSisterIncest certain questions about this]], Dumbledore assures him that "[[SesquipedalianLoquaciousness Mr. Weasley's ardor was fueled strictly by the sight of Miss Parkinson's assets]]."
* HaveIMentionedIAmHeterosexualToday: Draco is straight now.
-->''"Now?" Pansy asked, aghast.''
* HowWeGotHere
* IKnowYouKnowIKnow: "Or at least we don't think that he knows what we know about what you know about what he knows."
* LeaningOnTheFourthWall:
-->'''Harry''': Honestly, sometimes I think my own world is just an imaginary land for {{Fan Girl}}s who love [[DracoInLeatherPants redeemed bad boys]].
* LoopholeAbuse: Turns out the school handbook requires robes to be purchased by all students, but says nothing about actually wearing them.
* NakedPeopleAreFunny: The whole premise, really
* IWasJustJoking: Snape put the idea of streaking for house-elf rights in Hermione's head, most emphatically not expecting her to actually do it.
* OnlySaneMan: Harry, [[spoiler:until the end when he succumbs to the madness. Or sees the light, depending on your interpretation.]]
* RagingStiffie: Snape gets one while Hermione is helping him put makeup over his Dark Mark. He [[HandOrObjectUnderwear tries to hide it with a pillow]], but she eventually realizes what's happening and seems very into it too. At the point, a very {{Squick}}ed Harry interrupts the story and demands that Dumbledore skip this part, which he reluctantly agrees to do. Later on, Snape refers to "makeup" in a way that implies that this incident, um, lead to something.
* {{Retcon}}: The story about the night Harry's parents died is changed rather dramatically from the original series.
** Hint: I Spy, with my little eye, something [[spoiler: [[BananaPeel yellow]]]].
* RunningGag: The author uses a {{Framing Device}} in italics whenever Dumbledore prepares to tell the next part of story - it usually includes the place the events occurred and a precise measurement of how much time has passed since Hermione began the nude rebellion, but always referring to the event with an amusing {{Unusual Euphemism}}.
--> ''The Dungeons. Exactly six hours, thirty-seven minutes, and fifty-four seconds after initiation of project Birthday Suit.''
--> ''The Great Hall. Eight hours, sixteen minutes, forty seconds after Hermione became a Demi Moore fan.''
--> ''Ten hours, forty-three minutes, and twenty-seven seconds since the de-invention of pockets.''
* SceneryCensor: A rare literary version in the first chapter where all of the male character are coincidentally carrying broomsticks in front of them, the hut where Hermione is working has just recently built a new fence, and Dumbledore is happily ensconced behind his desk.
* SuspiciouslySpecificDenial: "Not with your sister in the broom closet, that's for sure."
* ThatCameOutWrong: Harry and Voldemort are forced to fight the FinalBattle with giant spoons, causing Voldemort to say "Potter, I will spoon you to death if it's the last thing I ever do."
* TeacherStudentRomance: Hermione and Snape have a great deal of sexual tension throughout the story and are implied to have had a sexual encounter of some kind when she took him aside to put makeup over his Dark Mark.
* TooMuchInformation: Harry's reaction to some parts of the story.