(in Nagoya, Japan...)
(Tori and Naoki look at the city)
Tori: It's quite...quaint. (nods a bit)
Naoki: Yeah! I don't think I've ever been there before...
Tori: ...wait. Seriously?
Naoki: No. I mean...there's just so much that I haven't seen!
Tori: Huh.
<Then again, I've been in Blue Bay Harbor for most of my life...>
Naoki: It's always a good idea to take it all in!
Tori: Y-yeah...(nods a bit more, and they head to Tokugawa Garden)
Naoki: So, what was your life like, back in America?
Tori: Well, I—
(then a boom)
...
I'll explain later. Right now, we have to find out what's going on here!
(Tori and Naoki head off)
(Rika looks at the author's page)
Rika: You know, I don't know if I should pity him, or just shake my head at this. Likewise, I don't know if all that's true or not...not saying that it isn't, but...I dunno.
Though holding a grudge against something for this long, or worrying over something this long, especially if it's fiction, isn't that healthy. At all. At most, seeing a therapist would help, I think...
(then she turns to the next chapter of the story)
Previously, stuff happened. Important? Who cares?
And so we move on with...
Chapter 7: Rangers, Separate Part One
The chapter begins with a fire starting, with men trying to put it out. The Rangers even rescue a baby...
...
I swear to God, is he trying to make it part-Time Force, part-fucking-Lightspeed Rescue?
And then they hear someone crying out. Sarah and Henri stay and fight the fake redcoats while the three others head back inside. They find someone wrapped in a blanket, only to throw a fireball at them.
- "We looked ahead and saw that the person was really a Virus in disguise. Obviously a Fire type who must have been responsible."
...uhhhhh, no shit?
The monster beats them, knocking them outside. To make a long story short, the fire monster gets outside, prepares to beat the fallen Rangers until Henri and Sarah stop them, and the men weaken the monster with water. The Rangers beat the monster until Ebbie uses the Re-animator.
...
And to make that a long story short, after the General Megazord is summoned, the heat monster tries to knock it down.
- Heat Monster: "Well… If you can't stand the heat, then sit it!"
...
Just what the fuck did that even mean?!
Anyway, the Megazord goes down, but—wouldn't you know it?—they're lying near the ocean. Gee, how fucking convenient! (And are they even near an ocean from where they're really at? I don't know...) The Megazord kicks the monster into the water, and it slashes at it, defeating it.
Yaaaaaaaaaawn.
Also, the fires disappear. Uh...what?
After a scene in the island where the villains bitch at each other, except for Tom, who has an idea, we cut back to the print shop. James and Sarah are editing their notes, and while everyone's hard at work, someone is screaming! Turns out that...it came from Sarah? Who is sitting on the bed?
Didn't the narration say that she was working? Dammit, contradictions!
She just read a letter, stating that her mom's ill, and she may not make it. You see, she has one of those fatal diseases (wait, if it was fatal, wouldn't she be dead by now? Sorry to ask), and the doctors have no idea on a cure.
...or they do. I have no damn idea.
Sarah's mom wanted her daughter to return to England for quite some time, and if she ever does die, she wanted to see her daughter one final time. And cue the waterworks, only from Sarah herself. While also embracing James.
Who comforts her.
...uhhhh...is it just me, or am I really seeing something weird? I mean, yeah, it's common for lovers to comfort one another. But why is James the only person to comfort Sarah? And not Henri or Moses? Mykan, I can (kind of) understand, what with the whole "fish out of temporal water" thing, but...
...
This is just going to set up more shipping, isn't it?
Moses, Mykan, and Henri talk amongst themselves on what they can do. James later joins the guys, and he tells them about what it's like, being orphaned. Even Mykan knows about it, but they realize that Sarah's situation is different.
They first discuss on how she can teleport to England on her lonesome, except for one thing. The Rangers do need her, and she can't fight on her own. WHAT. I'm sorry, but considering that Mykan's the damn one who gave them martial arts "training"...gaaaaaaah.
...I could be wrong, but most of Dakari-King Mykan's stories do involve women being...yeah. Not so much independent, but sometimes or mostly relying on men, or falling in love with them. Which does come across as very sexist. If this is true, this story may very well rival both The Prayer Warriors and Power Rangers Samurai as the most sexist thing to exist, ever.
And that's one hell of an accomplishment.
Sarah finally arrives, still rather upset. The guys tell her the plan: they'll have her go to England, but she won't go alone. James will escort her. Why? Not only because Sarah's mom wrote a few times that she would like to see her and her friends (okay, how in the hell would Mykan even know this?), but hey, might as well do some more damn shipping!
Also, Mykan hasn't met Sarah's mom yet, and he doubts she'll appreciate the idea of turning her daughter into a crimefighter. Well, considering that the fucking secret has been out...
The next day, Sarah and Mykan talk a bit, and she and James plan to teleport from the docks. And no, I have no idea if the measurements from Pennsylvania to England are even accurate. But take a look at this.
- Mykan: "Now remember… once you get 3,000 out. You'll be too far away so we can't contact each other with Mophers."
Now take a look at what's wrong with this fucking statement, several paragraphs later.
- Mykan: "The Morphers can at least send us a message of Danger. So if you two get in trouble, use the Morpher signals and we'll come for you."
Does that count as some sort of contact? I mean...
...
- Take a shot every single time there's contradictions in the story.
So as James and Sarah teleport to England, Tom watches. Using a capsule and an eel, he creates the Monster of the Arc: Electro. Yeaaaaaah...wait.
Electric...eel monster. Did the Pokemon creators or whoever designed the damn monsters somehow come across the story, think, "oh, we can totally do better than this!", and create the Tynamo line? This is just a coincidence!
...
I'll just nickname this guy "Tynamo".
Tynamo, after creating such a painful pun, teleports to America.
Wait...what? You mean to tell me that this...zombie is Sarah's cousin? Just...bwuh?
(Rika twitches)
...what's he going to do next, considering how he got revived? Have Sarah make a contract with another being, making her a zombie-like thing Magical Girl?
...
(Rika ends up laughing mad)
(in the garden...)
(Tori and Naoki head off, only to find...)
(...a very unidentifiable man teaching kids about traffic safety, but one thing's for sure, he's wearing red)
Tori: ...what the?
Naoki: That guy...that's not Kyousuke!
Tori: ...
<Just what is going on?>
(she looks at her morpher)
<I think I should contact the guys...>
Naoki: You think we've heard back from the other guys yet?
Tori: I haven't!
Naoki: Hm...
(in Osaka...)
Mao: ...oh, my God. (reads) "Gekisou Sentai Carranger was the 20th installment of Super Sentai. In it, it had five heroes, all of which were workers. Red Racer, Akita, was an actor who loved to teach kids about traffic safety, using the most explosions and special effects available."
Wait, no! Who's changing this?!
Ayumi: I don't know...
(she tries to think, and Mao attempts to contact Tori)
(in the garden...)
Tori: (speaking into the communicator) Blue Wind Legendary Ranger.
Mao: Tori, you are not going to believe this!
(Tori sports a serious look on her face)
Tori: Go on.
(and then, Mao begins to tell Tori about some...changes in Super Sentai)
Rika: ...whew.
(Rika drinks)
Back in the print shop, we see Mykan making something. What is that something? Prototypes of armor. Specifically, for Henri and Moses, the Mega Battle armor.
...
Oh, God. Just how much more shit from Lightspeed Rescue are you going to rip off?!
So as Mykan explains to them what they basically are, cut back to England. James and Sarah arrive, and the former realizes that since there are real British soldiers, he would be accused of being a spy. So what does he do? Straighten himself up and speak in a British accent. No, really.
Oh, and he took notes on how the British act and sound. Yeah...what?
Tom watches as we cut right damn back to Philadelphia. Tynamo searches for a way to get the Rangers' attention. And what better way to do it than try to endanger George Washington and his troops?
So as the monster tries to attack the future first President, enter Mykan's team, already morphed. Somehow, George recognizes Moses' voice. Yeah, at the risk of repeating myself, what happened to the whole "must keep the identities secret" thing, again?
The three Rangers fight against Tynamo, and—OH FUCKING DAMN IT! We go right back to London. Turns out that her mom is not only well, but also playing a game with other friends. Yeah, uh, what the hell?
Turns out that there's just a lot of confusion about the letter. Sarah's mom hasn't been ill for a long time, and that isn't the only thing they're concerned about, either. They're shocked as to how the two got to England so fast. James lies and says about receiving the letter just after they arrived. Oh, and they totally buy it.
Guys, really. Your team fucked up with the whole deal about the identities. Why not just tell them straight-up instead of waiting for a convenient plot device to come around?
...there's totally going to be a convenient plot device for that, isn't there?
Anyway. Sarah's mom tells her daughter that she can stay in England. Why? Because the dad, Samuel, is still gone, and Lady Phillips can't bear the thought of loneliness anymore.
This gives Sarah time to think it over, and by that, I mean "discuss it with James over whether or not it's a good idea to remain a Ranger". Oh, and some stuff about how in America, she loved being a journalist, and how Moses and Ben gave her a job, blah blah blah...
I'm sorry, but...gah. This story's making me feel more apathetic by the minute.
As Sarah thinks of all the possibilities, she hears a scream! Turns out that her mom's getting abducted, and after that, Tom leaves a message. It simply states that if they are to see her again, they must head to Big Ben before midnight. And so, our chapter ends with not only Sarah and James preparing themselves, but Mykan's team getting their asses kicked.
So tune in next time for more of the same shit.
Will Rika continue to survive? What other changes will the All-Stars V2.0 see? And can this fanfic get any worse?
Find out next time on the next Rika Liveblogs vs. Power Rangers: Revolution!
