...w-w-welcome back. (is shaking as the demon approaches her)
Previously o-on T-The Prayer W-w-w-w-warriors: The Evil G-g-g-gods Part II...oh, God...what have I done?
(looks back at the terrifying monster that has appeared before her)
...all the attempts to...discourage everyone from reading my liveblogs...while I still continue doing this...was it really worth it? Was it really worth screaming at the fuckers who wanted me to continue it? Was it really worth balancing that with my usual analyzing? Was...after all this time, was it really worth it?
(meanwhile, the Rangers and Warriors prepare for a battle unlike any other)
...and those guys. Even when I said to not worry themselves in the line of fire, yet, they defy me. I guess I haven't really realized how...strong they really are. Makes one hopeful for the world.
Carter: Okay, guys!
Matoi: Are you ready?
Mako: Ready!
Catherine: Ready.
Carter: Ready!
Matoi: Chakusou!
Carter: Lightspeed! Rescue!
Mako: Ippitsu Soujou!
(the three henshin/morph into their respective forms: Carter as the Red Lightspeed Ranger, Mako as Shinken Pink, Matoi as GoRed. Catherine prepares hers last)
Catherine: Red Advent, Awaken the Legend!
(and as for her henshin sequence, Catherine is bathed in red aura, and as it reveals her being suited up into the Red Legendary Ranger, the aura breaks away into millions of tiny particles. Clad in what it can be best described as a mixture of spandex and leather, Catherine also has the Roman numeral symbol for "19" on her chest, signifying the nineteenth year of the Rangers. Her helmet appears, which can be described as the same as her Sentai counterpart-sort of, AkaRed—hell, the entire costume is based on him. She gasps)
Oh...wow. I did not even expect it to work!
Carter: Okay, guys!
Matoi: Let's go!
(all four fight, Matoi and Carter using their V-Lancers, Mako using her Heaven Fan, and Catherine with...Good Old Fisticuffs. The former three, notably, do decent damage, while Catherine's just...slightly less, considering that she's trying to get used to her new powers)
...wow! Good job, guys!
...ahem. Where was I? Oh, shit.
Previously on The Prayer Warriors: The Evil Gods Part II, the "heroes" head off for New Delhi, where they find out where Jupiter is staying. Also, in one of the most anti-climatic bullshitteries ever, Percy is freed, not really brainwashed at all!
God, I so need enough drinks to put myself in a hangover after this shit.
(realizes one thing)
...holy fuck. Three liveblogs completed. Seventy-eight chapters covered. Thirty-nine installments done. And months of wasted time...was that...all worth it?
No. I can't give up...maybe after this...will I find salvation?
Demon: YOU WILL NEVER FIND ANY SALVATION WHILE I'M AROUND!
(the demon smacks the heroes down)
Matoi: He's too strong!
Mako: We can't give up, though, we survived worse things, we can survive this! (tries to blow the demon away, but it continues to take some damage)
Catherine: Mako's right, guys! (she's smacked away) Oh, you want to play hardball? I'll show you hardball.
(she takes out a small orb with the Space insignia)
Red Advent, Let's Rocket!
(she places the orb into her morpher, and it turns into the Space morpher. She dials 3-3-5, and she morphs into the Red Space Ranger, able to use Andros' Spiral Saber, which she does)
...good luck, guys.
(turns to the audience) Anyway! As we say here in Rika Liveblogs, I started the party, now I'm shutting it down!
So let's move on with...
Chapter 19: Battle for New Delta the Final Showdown. Of Anticlimaticness.
Percy, Jason, Grover—wait, wasn't Grover fucking dead already?!—and Jerremy await for the signal to arrive in Taj Mahal—despite, again, it being located in Agra. Kenobi (who I presume would be Ebony's long-lost relative or some shit), Annabeth, and Piper set up the bombs. Oh, and they head elsewhere after that. Why? Because this is not a place for women to be in.
...I am soooooooo going to be glad that this will be all over soon. I just need to—GAH!
(ducks when Carter's getting tossed around)
Carter: Do you think you can stop us?! We will never bow to the likes of you!
(Carter unleashes a Spectra Blast from his V-Lancer, damaging the demon some more. So far, the heroes are gaining the advantage...)
Ahem.
The men, meanwhile, head inside to find Jupiter. But then, an arrow strikes Grover, instantly killing him a-fucking-gain. How do they react to that? They don't mourn. It's just another Sunday for them.
In the main hall, they see a bunch of demons with Satanist Indians. Oh, and the kids are used as slaves. Wait, what?
And...believe it or not? As sadistic as the Prayer Warriors are (and trust me, they are!), they actually have the common sense to not kill the kids. That's honestly surprising, given how fucking many acts of evilness they've done! Still, even one act of kindness is not enough to redeem them.
Then Percy goes on, blah blah blah, about how the Satanists and demons are going straight to Hell. Oh, and they're going to die. And so, we get another curb-stomp battle in which the Prayer Warriors fight against the foes. We even get a description of one of the victims! Yay!
- "Percy approached a big ugly looking one and he screw his sword and slice the man's throat open. And while the man screamed, Percy inspiringly stabbed the sword straight threw the mane's chest. The man died a painful death but because he worshiped Hindu an evil satanic false endian god he deserved everyone long undying moment of his death. If he had worship the one true lord Jesus Christ and his eternal father up there in heaven where he shares his power God things would have been very different."
...Hindu is a fucking religion. Not a god. Do some research.
Also, Jason strangles a draft, and after that? As soon as everyone is killed off, they exit as the bombs go off. Yes, they destroyed a fucking beautiful mausoleum just because it's Satanic. Truly, they should be proud.
But alas. We finish the chapter with Ebony announcing, paraphrasing, "Thank you, Prayer Warriors! But our enemy is in another castle temple!" Which makes the destruction of the Taj Mahal completely, utterly, fucking pointless!
(the demon is weakening, at half-strength. But then, he tosses a powerful fireball at Catherine. The damage it takes, plus the damage from the dimensional rift, forces her to demorph, losing her powers for the time being until Alyx can repair it)
Catherine: Fucking damn it!
Mako: Catherine! Are you okay?!
Catherine: Yeah...I'll be fine...I still have some tricks up my sleeve, don't worry about me!
(she summons a weak lightning bolt, and she strikes. It damages the demon a bit—paralyzing him!)
Shit, I didn't think it'd work!
(she alternates between Thundershock and Powder Snow while the rest use their weapons)
All right! Ahem...
So will the group manage to find Jupiter and destroy him once and for all? Will Jupiter outmatch the Warriors and take over the world? Who will win?
Because...the series all ends now.
Chapter 20: The Prayer Warriors are Vicious. Even if They Are Victorious, This is More Accurate.
After realizing that Jupiter has left, they find Bill. He reveals that Jupiter has hidden himself in a burned-out church that was turned into a Satanist haven. After finding that out, the Warriors head to that haven. Yes, they manage to sneak to the gate.
And then they call for Jupiter to arrive, but once he doesn't show up? They tear through the gates and kill every single fucking Satanist beast inside!
...goody. I suppose the final battle will end in a curb-stomp, too.
Oh, wait. Jupiter is running through the gates, fleeing. The Warriors try to catch up, but...he's a fast runner. Huh, an enemy that's actually strong, I'm kinda surprised. Especially considering how many times the other enemies, Gods included, went down like punks!
But then. The Warriors pray to God and Jesus to strike him down. And via the Bolt of Divine Retribution, Jupiter is, indeed, struck down.
Worst. Ending. Ever.
(the demon roars as he smacks both Mako and Matoi, but the two strike back with kicks and punches. The foe unleashes another fireball, and Catherine takes the blow...)
Oh, for...(sighs)
Anyway. The Warriors celebrate the God's demise after making sure that he isn't mostly dead, he's sincerely dead. They decide that, since Jupiter is dead, India will go back to being a Christian country before they rebelled against colonialism. What. So you want to make India suppressed?
Oh, and the people will worship Christ instead of the Satanic God Hindu. Thomas...you're a fucking idiot.
Oh. Wait. Wait, just a moment. After the group celebrates and declares how much this will be celebrated, Jupiter wakes up! Oh, shit.
Jerremy asks as to why he wakes up instead of, you know, taking the time to shoot/stab/stone him repeatedly. Jupiter gives out an explanation.
- Jupiter: "I am electricity proof since I am the god of Thunder!"
...what the fuck. Jupiter is shock-proof? He isn't wearing anything rubber! And newsflash, Jupiter, Electric-types do take damage from other Electric-types, albeit not as strong. Does he have fucking Volt Absorb or Motor Drive? Because that would explain a lot!
Anyway...Jupiter tells them to bow down to him, and he gets out a gun. Normally, I'd root for Jupiter to kill the assholes. But now that we see just how much of a monster he is? I am not going to root for anyone. I'm not even going to root for the "heroes", either, because they've done evil stuff as well in the name of God!
This story is fucked up moreso than any Prayer Warriors stories combined.
Jupiter aims at Jerremy, but Percy Jackson gets into the way, and the evil God shoots him. Yep. All the attempts to save Percy's ass? Brought down to nothing. Because that one act of self-sacrifice? Normally, it'd be commendable. But since the entire story has him being rescued as the main plot?
That self-sacrifice turns the entire story out to be completely fucking worthless!
Anyway, Jupiter, job...well done, I guess, hops onto a cloud that's now shaped like the evil George Lucas (seriously, Thomas? What the fuck did Lucas do wrong? It isn't like he killed anyone or anything!), and he flies off to the United Arab Empire, where he'll be protected until Judgment Day. That's when God will kill him for good and send him to Hell.
And no, this will never be brought up again. Nor will I bother to do so.
Jerremy runs to Percy, who...is destroyed completely? How much fucking damage can a single shot from a gun cause? Then again, a god shot the gun. Jerremy asks Percy to not die, but...of course he does.
OUR FUCKING HEROES, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!
No. Seriously. They could have taken the initiative and either shot or stoned (or stabbed/beheaded!) Jupiter when he was completely stunned. It would make for a shitty finale, but that would be better—marginally better—than this plot-induced stupidity. The likes of which greatly rivals when the Rangers didn't manage to rescue Zordon all because of their shittastic leader's bitching about his missing sister! Granted, admittedly, as pointless as that outcome was, Zordon's sacrifice actually did prove a point, as he purged the Ranger universe from known foes.
In the end, in comparison, the "heroes" did not rescue Percy; instead, he pretty much committed a stupid self-sacrifice that, by the way, doesn't do anything to the plot at hand. No one stops Jupiter, he gets off scot-free. Making the entire fucking plot, once again, COMPLETELY FUCKING POINTLESS!
...my God, I have never been so pissed off at...oooooooooooooooh!
(slams my head a million times due to that absolute stupidity)
(three hours later...)
Okay. Now I'm better.
The day of the funeral, Jerremy walks over to Dexter's son, who actually has a name this time—William. Since the guy's old enough, the horrid leader tells him this. Yep, it's another hook to a future story that, once again, I will not cover.
- Jerremy: "You must go to Egypt where a revelation has taken place. Although the Islamic Satanist try to take control of the country, a group of demons who pretend to be the Egyptian gods are also trying to take over that place. I want you to go with Ebony to Egypt to free them from these two evil groups and free it by making it a Christian country again."
Yep. They're going to go after the Egyptian Gods now. And that story will be covered in The Prayer Warriors: Attack of the Sphinx. Yeah, fuck that shit.
At least it isn't shilled in one of the earlier chapters like the first three stories.
Jerremy walks over to the church grounds, ready to watch the funeral. Then...he hears a voice. As we finally close this story, the voice states that he (or she) is the traitor. Who is it?
...
WE GET A FUCKING CLIFFHANGER! Yes, it'll be revealed in The Prayer Warriors: The Titans Strike Back. You know what? Fuck that shit, too! I will not liveblog any single one of these stories ever again! This! Is just...HORRIBLE!
(gains a clarity)
...
(stands up)
...f-finally. I'm done...
(the demon, nearly defeated, strikes back at the heroes with one powerful fireball. They're down, but not out...)
...I don't have to do this...anymore. I feel so free. It feels that the chains have been lifted off of me. I know now what to do. I know...that I shouldn't have taken it out on the people who wanted me to liveblog it. I should have used better judgment. With the bad, comes the good.
...
(the heroes stand up, but before they strike...I walk over)
Guys. Let me handle this. (looks at the demon, and he roars)
...yeah. Roar all you fucking want. Want to know why? I have conquered four of your fucking stories! And all of those stories sucked ass tremendously! Do you think you can destroy me? Fuck no! Because I have survived every single fucking thing you threw at me! From your tracts to your sexism! From your potshots to your repeated fails at everything!
You? You claim to be a Christian?! Look at yourself! You're a monster—just like your "heroes". You know what I think? After surviving eighty chapters of your bullshit, I will say this!
I will forever think of your stories as non-entities! I will never touch any of your shit ever again! (prepares her own weapon, a slingshot)
Guys! STRIKE THE FUCKER DOWN!
Carter: V-Lancer, Spectra Blast, Fire! (aims his Spectra Blast at the demon)
Mako: Heaven Fan, blow him away! (unleashes a powerful wind)
Matoi: Five Lasers! (shoots the demon)
Catherine: I never did this before...Tri Attack! (unleashes Ember, Powder Snow, and Thundershock)
And...THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELLS YOU! I'VE STARTED THIS FUCKING PARTY!
(pulls the slingshot)
NOW I WILL SHUT IT DOWN ONCE AND FOR ALL!!
(releases the slingshot, pinging a rock in the middle of the demon's forehead. The combined attacks finish him off, and he's sent right back to Jell)
...we...we did it. We actually...did it...
(then a shift happens)
The fuck?
Catherine: Rika! Since we saved the world...we'll finally be able to go home!
Matoi: Yes! Finally...I just hope that my siblings and parents aren't worried about my disappearance...
Carter: And my friends, too.
Mako: I hope that nothing really happened, nothing too severe...
...I'm sure everything will be fine. Sorry that your morpher broke, Cath.
Catherine: It's fine. Nothing like having someone else to fix it. And this time, I'll make sure that Alyx knows that it'll have to take a while to fix it and get it out of the beta stage.
(their bodies begin to glow)
It's time. Be seeing you, Rika.
(the others wave/shout their goodbyes, and they vanish, back to their respective worlds)
...it's over. They're...gone. Where was I...?
Oh, yes. My final words.
So that was The Prayer Warriors: The Evil Gods Part II. What did I think about it? Well...
(finally unleashes my total fury)
THIS FUCKING PIECE OF SCUM-SHIT THAT'S AN INSULT TO OTHER SCUM-SHITS IS HORRIBLE! EVEN WORSE THAN THE THREE FUCKING STORIES PRIOR TO THIS COMBINED!!
Yes, we get more of the same. Author tracts, sexism, pointless deaths, pointless destructions, and a shitload of dropped plots that could have been interesting. And yes, believe it or not, there were actually good things in this story. But the frequency of those happening? Few and far between. And when they happen, the future events made by Thomas take a shit over it.
This whole absence of good, even when the good happens? That, to me, marks just how...how...horrendous this is. Also...I can't state how much of fucking fail the ending is. Because they didn't rescue Percy, he self-sacrificed. And for what? Absolutely nothing.
That was the ultimate icing on the cake filled with shitdark, misogyny, tracts, and loads of possibilites that lead up to absolutely nowhere. The cliffhanger of who's the traitor notwithstanding, but how much do you want to bet that Thomas will put that off even more, too?
And...I am finally glad that this is over. Because this is the last story that I'll ever cover. I will retire from making any more liveblogs of any Prayer Warriors stories. And when Thomas makes more, if he makes more, I'll ignore them. I've had more than my fair share of bullshittery by him!
So fuck reviewing bad shit for a while, let's focus on the good—
(a movie drops)
Huh?
(sees the movie that I'll review next)
...fucking seriously? Well, I'm sure that it can't get any worse than what I saw, so...
Anyway. This has been Rika Liveblogs The Prayer Warriors: The Evil Gods Part II. Until next time, see ya!
...and by that...join us next time when I'll review the incomprehensible Mind Fuck that is...Goodbye, 20th Century!. Which...I'm really hoping that this will be better.
(studies the movie for a while until all memories of The Prayer Warriors are gone)
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