Welcome back.
Previously on The Prayer Warriors: The Evil Gods Part II, we met our young hero Jason. He was baptized, but then Grover showed up. They killed him, and then poor Annabeth was tricked into committing suicide. Also?
This story finally has 99% less tracts, women-bashing, Jesus as a yes-man, and all other unsavory stuff.
PRAISE THE LORD!
But will it stay for long? Well, we'll find out as we head right back into...
The Author's Notes has Ebony and Thomas stating stuff about how we need to stop giving them negative reviews. Sadly, liveblogging stuff is my job, so...
Also. Thomas claims that he won't shoot himself with a gun. Because as the messenger of the Lord...those types don't commit suicide. Okay, whatever you say.
Chapter 3 is called "The Camp Decides to Take Revenge for Annabeth and Grover's Deaths". It begins with Thalia crying over the death of Annabeth. And what does Jason do? He doesn't comfort her, he reads the Bible!
...a part of me wants to believe that since Jason doesn't know who he is, it's a reaction he has, he doesn't know what to do. Then again, we did see him comfort Annabeth, so make of that what you will.
Thalia introduces herself to Jason, and we get a glorified recap of the first, God-awful story. Long story short, she helped Percy kill Zeus, his dad (even though he's not). Oh, and remember the girl who hated being raped? That was Rachael.
Jason thanks Thalia for telling him about the story. He wants to find out more about Annabeth's fate, and...we don't get anything of it. She is determined, though, to bring holy revenge onto Satan (even though she even says that she's supposed to turn the other cheek), as he possessed Grover.
As Thalia leaves, Jason follows her. She makes her speech to the entire Prayer Warriors.
- Thalia: "I can tell you that a friend of mine has died. Although we were not of the same blood, because we all shared the same heavenly father, we are sisters through the one and only true God. And I want to tell you something very important. Although Annabeth killed herself and this is a sin in God's eyes, it would have been punished. But because she was under the control of Satan (and without her own free will) she will go to heaven with Grover. It was not their fault but the tractor's fault. We must find this tractor and destroy it along with Satan. This tractor has been among us for many years, before we were able to defeat the evil god's of Greece. But I want you all to join me in defeating this evil once and for all!"
Yes. It's not Annabeth's fault but the mysterious traitor. I'm not going to lie. I'm honestly excited to see how this plot will go! (Never mind the odd choice of words at the beginning. And the continuing usage of "tractor" instead of "traitor".)
The Warriors cheer, and Jason and Leo join with Thalia. They decide to go to Washington, D.C. There, they'll meet someone who knows of the traitor's true identity.
However, a few will stay in order to guard the other Prayer Warriors, like Chiron, Luke, and a girl named Piper. Also, the latter two are dating. Never mind that last time, Luke married Rachael. Then again, screwing up the timeline can do that to you.
Oh, and you know about how Thomas promises that Chiron and Jason will talk about suicide in the beginning? Well, never trust a trailer, because they never did that, Thalia did.
Regardless, though, the chapter ends with Thalia saying a prayer: she prays for Jesus and God to protect them against the traitor. And so off they go.
So far, so good. I have to admit, this is really decently-written thus far!
This chapter is called "Attack of the Vampire". Why are vampires suddenly relevant in this story? I can surmise that they're mooks.
Also, this chapter's written by Ebony. Let's see how she does in this solo offering.
Jason follows Leo and Thalia as the latter two talk about—what else?—a story from the Bible. However, he's more focused on how awesomely pleasant the day is. He has been very lucky, indeed, for he has good friends that don't kill him on sight.
For once.
They're in Washington, D.C., looking for the person who'll help them. Unfortunately for them, before they left, Chiron gave them a brief description. And God will show them the person they're trying to find.
They spark guesses of who this traitor might be. Could it be Luke? Nope. After all, he did help them defeat the evil Greek Gods. Thalia thinks that it might be Leo. Possibly. Whoever's doing this, though? He's likely doing the least for God, even skipping church, and smoking pot, and running over schoolkids with his car—wait, that last bit never did happen.
Leo then realizes that he screwed up, big-time, and he promises to never do it again. Well, at least they're not killing him. He even adds that such things like this will cause a strain in their friendship, and they'll never beat Satan and his evil forces that way.
...that was oddly heartwarming. I wish I was kidding. But I'm not.
Suddenly, a bat appears. Always those damned bats, I tell ya. However, the bat transforms into a female vampire.
Show of hands, what do you want to bet that the vampire is another strawman representation of me?
Thalia tells the vampire to get the fuck out, but she speaks. In butchered Old English.
- Vampire: "Thy not effected by ye weak demands. Thy powers are stronger. Only a strike to the heart will kill thy and send thy to hell. Ye has no powers yet to defeat thy."
...okay, this is a big weakness. "Thy" means "your" in Old English. So what you're saying is "You(')r(e) not effected by your weak demands. Your powers are stronger. Only a strike to the heart will kill your and send your to Hell. You has no powers yet to defeat your."
Or something like that, I'm pretty bad at Old English.
Despite this setback, Jason is scared. But then he finds a cross, likely given to him by one of the other Prayer Warriors. Seeing it makes the vampire shriek and flee.
Hey, you know what would have been more awesome? If Jason shouted, "THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELLS YOU!"
Anyway, Thalia and Leo congratulate Jason for his job well done. And as I exactly thought, the vampire is a part of Satan's mooks—more powerful than ever before. So that means no curb-stomping the bastards with a prayer. They have to use their minds for once and figure out their true weaknesses.
...my God. I...I'm honestly loving the fact that the tables are turning, and the mooks aren't weak anymore!
So they decide to actually not go on ahead and ask about the traitor, but rather who the vampire is and where she lives. Of course, the fact that there's a vampire in their midsts is either an Unusually Uninteresting Sight or they don't believe in such stuff. Which is actually understandable.
Eventually, they decide that God will give them the answer. In their sleep. Okay. And after that, they baptize a baby. Why? So we can get this.
- "She told the parents that it is important to get the baby baptized so that its sins can be forgiven by God. This is because having sex is needed to produce a baby – a sin – meaning that the baby will be living in sin unless it gets baptized."
I know what you're thinking. "OH MY GOD THAT MEANS THAT HAVING BABIES SHOULD BE BANNED!" Actually...ever heard a little place called Limbo? That's actually where the babies that aren't baptized, among others (i.e. anyone who has sinned, but died in the friendship of God—oh, and they can't enter Heaven unless redemption by Jesus Christ made it so), go. Why? Because, indeed, the babies died too young to commit personal sin, but they weren't freed from original sin.
(Of course, why Thomas used something that, I believe, was in the Catholic religion is beyond me, but eh.)
The chapter ends with the three heading to bed after doing their good deeds, hoping that God will give them a sign.
Four chapters down, and it may look into the up! Will Thalia, Jason, and Leo find out who the vampire is? Will they discover the traitor's identity? Will they rescue Percy Jackson?
Awaken that soul on the next liveblogging of The Prayer Warriors: The Evil Gods Part II!
