Live Blogs Let's Play Kingdom Hearts: 9 Years Too Late

MousaThe142011-08-26 16:58:42

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I can't believe the moment I get somewhere I fall off a ledge wait-.

CHAMBER 4 !?? It Exists? Oh hay! Cutscene! Riku is still toying with Sora's heart because he doesn't want to believe he's moved on with the short tempered duck and the dopey dog. Wow Riku, your Self-esteem must be non-existent, it's no wonder you act like an overconfident jerk, you almost have more confidence issues than I do.

So Maleficent is taunting him and talking about the darkness in his soul because, really, what else is she supposed to do besides stand around and look menacing. Riku, in his typical insecure self, tells her to shove it up her bony long rear.

Actually, now that I think about it, do Disney villains look a little... tall to you? They all seem to be really tall or bear some sort of noodley appearance, Hades, Maleficent, definitely Jafar...

I just realized, Nintendo made a more convincing stomach pulsating innards level on the Nintendo 64 than Square Enix did on the legendary Playstation 2. HAH, posers.

While Pinocchio runs away we find Sora and the motley crew finally find Riku and Sora, in his infinite wisdom wonders why R Iku is acting like a prick. You only just noticed this?

So we have a battle of wits, where both sides are utterly convinced they're correct and their opponent is wrong only it seems Riku is the right one here, since it is true that all this time Sora has been running around accomplishing a goal he knows nothing about under the visage that he's looking for Kairi. BURNED! Point goes to Riku! We are treated to the blood curdling cries of the boy with no strings, no doubt tangled up in some mess regardless.

The end of the cutscene and the sudden appearance of a save point tells me that RP Gs need to do away with the concept of a "save point" and that I'm probably going to die soon.

I enter the... Ugh, literally called the Bowels, god, I was only joking before and.... MOTHER OF MERCY, WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?

It looks like a simplified version of a Legend of Zelda boss you'd find in a forest level. Actually, I think I beat something like this in Okami not too long ago. I'm not sure what I'm looking at, it has a weird cut face like this Ow O. Eerie. It's structured like the Piranha Pete fight in the Subspace Emissary section of Super Smash Brothers Brawl only instead of him holding two cages to use as weapons, his belly is the cage and it's arms are giant blue Rayquazas.

So the fight starts and fro some reason Riku wants to help me now. Make up your mind, blondi-...er... actually, no that doesn't work... What do you call a person with white hair exactly

Also, one last question: WHAT IN THE NAME OF GOD AND COUNTRY IS THIS THING DOING IN THE BOWELS OF A GIANT SPACE WHALE!?

Comments

ZackFair Since: Dec, 1969

Aug 26th 2011 at 5:09:28 PM

I think Riku's only helping you out right now because he needs Pinnochio and I'm not sure, but the last time Sora saw Riku was in Traverse Town when he was just being his usual self.

Watch as Riku becomes a bigger prick.

angelistoftenshi Since: Dec, 1969

Aug 26th 2011 at 5:21:47 PM

Mousa, you are also inside the bowels of a Space Whale, so why wouldn't that thing be there too?
If you must know, it's a heartless. Heartless appear everywhere.

X2X Since: Dec, 1969

Aug 26th 2011 at 5:55:55 PM

Ah, the Parasite Cage. Have fun.

It's not that Riku has confidence issues. He's an Anti Villain who's pissed at Sora for allegedly forgetting about him and Kairi to go on adventures with a duck and a dog. As Zack said, he gets worse. Much, much worse.

Also, anyone in this series who isn't above the age of 15 is short. Sora is only about as tall as Aerith's waist if you look closely. And it isn't until II that he's barely taller than Goofy and Yuffie.

And on the subject of space whales, Jecht gives his regards.