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Middle-aged mayhem and youthful tomfoolery. It's the return of the Total Comedy liveblogger!
Iniquitus The Third

[table of contents]
Introduction and Information post.
Good evening (/morning/day/night/twilight/noonlight/starlight/Vegemite), fellow Tropers! This is your host, Iniquitus The Third, inviting you back to the stands to watch as I fail epically at managing the hopes and fortunes of a small medieval European Nation, driving them into ruin and wiping their name from history!


Silly Buggers aside, yes, hello again. This will be a liveblog operating on much the same basis as the previous one, which will forever remain incomplete as a result of technical and RL sheniagans. So I thought to myself as I wept over the burning wreckage of my labour, "Iniqui ol' buddy ol' pal, why don'tcha give it another go? After all, what have you got to lose, other than the little self-respect that you had and the utter failure of your best attempt?"

As you may be able to discern by the existence of this post, I decided to run with it.

Righto then, let's get into it. First off, I'll outline the factions available for choice and give my opinion of them. Loong post ahead, so be warned.


NOTE: In terms of difficulty, I will say that I generally find the Islamic factions the easiest to play with, then the Catholic factions, and finally the Orthodox factions. Mainly because the first two groups get to have holy wars (cheap-as-f*ck mercenaries and no upkeep? Please sir, can I have some more?), and the last one... doesn't, and the Pope is a dick.

(Northwest Europe)




(The Iberian Peninsula)




(Central and Eastern Europe)

Holy Roman Empire









(Asia Minor and the Middle East)

Byzantine Empire

The Turks


Welp, that's all the factions I'm willing to play. I could hack the game file to allow the Papacy, but this is me writing these words, and I cannot hack worth shyte. Post a response with your preferred faction for me to play as, and I'l tally the votes whenever I find the time to do so.

MAJOR EDIT TIME: The votes I have in so far are both in favour of...*drumroll* ...the Moors! So, with your leave, the Almovarid Empire will have a list of characters up within the week, and we can learn the names of the first bunch of crazies to rampage across Europe!
31st Dec '10 12:11:11 AM flag for mods
Awesome to see a Total War liveblog going!

It sounds like we want the Moors or Germans. The Moors sound like your favourite faction, with the Germans (ok, Holy Roman Empire) coming in second. On the other hand, the Moors sound like a bit of a stomp, while the Germans might offer a bit more of a fight. It depends on how you want to do your liveblog.

Also, and take this from a fellow blogger; an empire the size and position of the HRE is going to require a lot of effort to keep track of and write up. Multiple fronts mean you're going to be keeping track on what multiple other nations are doing on top of what all your major cities are up to, while you may have multiple fronts... which means you may find yourself writing up more than one battle report at a time, and I struggled with just dealing with one! Be aware that your time commitment with the Germans initially may be larger than the Moors by a considerable amount, though eventually your empire will probably grow large enough to take a considerable amount of time to cover.

(Which is why, incidentally, I'd suggest doing a short campaign rather than a long one.)

As for a firm choice... I vote Moors, if only to give you an easier time of it and because I have a few entertaining strategies in mind to suggest. (Which involve taking Wales and Crete, amongst other things...)
GameChainsaw 4th Jan 11 (edited by: GameChainsaw)

Well, just one enemy wouldn't be cricket now, would it? And the more I fail, the funnier it gets...

Well then, because I have none of the clout of other livebloggers, yours is likely to be the only comment I get. ^^; Moors it is!

(waits until Friday)
IniquitusTheThird 4th Jan 11
I do like the idea of the Moorish invasion of Wales :-)
Tadeous 5th Jan 11



Moors: 2
IniquitusTheThird 5th Jan 11
Good to see there's one of these things are around.

And I love the Moors.
Nightmare24 7th Jan 11

YES! Spread the Moor-love! Who cares about the Reconquista? It's Jihad time!

More seriously, I have in fact gotten the opening data down and a save game at the very start of the game all set up. Soon...
IniquitusTheThird 7th Jan 11
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