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The Adventure of Failure Shepard or How Not to Play the Mass Effect Trilogy
Peteman
lrrose
Peteman
(edited by: Peteman)
I wonder, why was the survivor chosen over, say, ruthless? Fail Shepard got the job done, but got most of his squad killed.
Peteman
Because Ruthless Shepard knew that s/he was going to get his/her men killed, but also knew that this would accomplish the mission. Colonist Sole Survivor Shepard just has horribly bad luck.
lrrose
montagohalcyon
Sure, though it won't be a very long list. Can't get them killed off if I never recruit them.
lrrose
Korval
flamestream
Kardavnil
Have a feeling I know who's dying on Virmire...
montagohalcyon
Wait, Wrex lives? Is he needed alive for Shepard to fail something later more spectacularly?
montagohalcyon
lrrose
Peteman
Korval
Sparing Rana has a very minor drawback in ME3. It doesn't effect gameplay or story, but it still is somewhat less optimal result than killing her.
lrrose
Since you don’t have garrus or liara at this point, you shouldn’t need the family armor to make Wrex stand down. Wrex will stand down if his dying would leave you with only tali for the last part of Virmire.
SlabBulkhead
Apparently one can really blaze through the first Mass Effect when not bothering with all the side quests.
montagohalcyon
ultimatepheer
JobanGrayskull
(edited by: JobanGrayskull)
You'll find that's a recurring theme with Bioware products
MachineMan1992
EndarkCuli
Congratulations! You win the $20 Bill Award! What will you do now?
JamesPicard
EndarkCuli
lrrose
I've never done it, but can't you kill Zaeed during his loyalty mission? That would seem like a unique opportunity for failure. I understand if you don't want to complicate your later plans though.
montagohalcyon
I couldn't figure out a way to finish the Suicide Mission with Zaeed and the two people I want to survive as the only survivors.
lrrose
Considering his bone-headed decision here, Warden Kuril could\'ve made a good replacement for Fail Shepard.
JamesPicard
It doesn\'t mention this, but I have to imagine for added hilarity that your squadmates were Garrus and Grunt. After all, bringing the humans would be a smart plan, and when has Fail Shep ever done that?
JamesPicard
Do we add abducted colonists to the list?
Peteman
Sure.
lrrose
montagohalcyon
I was curious because they might not qualify yet. You see them getting mulched later, so technically them getting processed at that time might be when they get listed.
Peteman
You Killed Kal'Reegar, you bastard.
ultimatepheer
Peteman
If I included every Mook I killed, the list would be way, way too long. I think I'm going to mostly keep it to named characters.
lrrose
I guess "assorted mercenaries, slavers, geth troops, Cerberus operatives and scientists" would be enough.
Peteman
He hath not died! He hath merely shed his mortal shell. His ascension to memehood hath been foretold!
Peteman
Wait, Nassana isn't (Plot)? Is there a way to keep her from dying?
montagohalcyon
You can beat the game without recruiting Thane.
lrrose
And now, the point in the game where you can goof off and do a bunch of side quests without the main plot getting in the way. Clearly, Failure Shepard is avoiding going off somewhere and accidentally succeeding at something, but it's still nice to see that you're making good progress.
EndarkCuli
Korval
Charging restores shields, which comes in handy since Husks are usually accompanied by more dangerous enemies. I also usually don't put many points in Shockwave since I find its usefulness to be too situational.
lrrose
Can I suggest you include (Mission) as one of the causes of death? Some of these missions are optional, but if you do them, their death is unavoidable.
Peteman
Kind of like (plot).
Peteman
Good idea. I'll start next update.
lrrose
If anyone's curious, I have the death list in a textfile, so I just Copy + Paste it everyupdate instead of rewriting it all the time.
lrrose
Fail Shepard, the doom magnet.
Peteman
Peteman
lrrose
I had real life stuff come up yesterday, today I was busy with the "Citadel" DLC and I probably will be finished that DLC off tomorrow. I should be back with another update on Thursday.
lrrose
Oh man, your Citadel DLC party is going to be so depressing. I"m interested to see how many people survived to show up...
bbg1129
Peteman
Korval
Exact same fail happened to me first time doing this mission, i thought just following Joram's so easy it's boring, and I momentarily snoozed. Just enough for me to lose sight of Joram and I could not find him again in time. I felt like an idiot.
lonelyloner
montagohalcyon
The fate of the Heretics doesn't effect that much. It's another decision combined with this one that will really bite Fail Shep in the ass.
lrrose
Peteman
And so, the question of 'which two lucky squaddies will survive Failure Shepard's bumbling' has finally been answered. For a while, I assumed that Miranda would live (in order to be killed later on by Failure forgetting to pass on important information). But you've done a wonderful job of creating calamity thus far, and I have high hopes for the missions to come.
EndarkCuli
Thank you.
lrrose
I'm curious? Why did you send someone back? That would get Chakwas and the colonists killed. Couldn't you get your team weak enough to get who you wanted killed?
Peteman
It was the only way I could think of to get Grunt killed.
lrrose
Peteman
I didn't even know it was possible to do that.
Yagami1211
After the minor discussion over Zaeed's mission earlier, I was a tad surprised that you actually went through with it at the tail end. Still, the results were...well, 'fail-tastic' isn't a real word, but it's the only way I can describe the chaos that ensued. Best of luck when the Reapers come a-knockin'!
EndarkCuli
11 hours? Geez...each Mass Effect game took me a couple of months. I guess that can happen if you're skipping most side missions though.
montagohalcyon
lrrose
No Arrival DLC so you can add the death of untold billions of batarians to your kill count?
WayToTheDawn
So I tried my own Failure run a while back where I instead failed to upgrade the Normandy\'s armor, trading out Jack\'s survival for Miranda\'s. It still worked, and ultimately left me with less war assets in 3. I\'m wondering if you can do a Failure run with Tali as the second survivor, though the consequences of that may not be worth it.
JamesPicard
JamesPicard
Ah, Core...she'll be an interesting case when it comes time to add her name to the list of casualties. I mean, even though Legion is just a part of a greater collective, at least it showed more personality than I think Core ever will. Still, if she wasn't outed by the Mars researchers immediately (and assuming that they're more competent than Shepherd), I suppose she must have at least some degree of Artificial Intelligence...
EndarkCuli
I believe that Dr. Eva is an AI. She gives orders to the Cerberus soldiers on Mars, her hardware is apparently capable of carrying an AI and she was created as a replacement for EDI.
lrrose
Peteman
I was going to do an update today, but the weather is really horrible so I didn't get a chance to play without risking a power outage. I'm going to try and do two missions tomorrow though.
lrrose
And now, Core's been officially added to the list. Soon to come, hopefully: the payoff for sparing Wrex way back in part one of this trilogy. Best of luck, mate!
EndarkCuli
Part of me wishes there was a way to screw up so epically that you alienate both the salarians and the Krogan.
Peteman
But who cares about salarians?
ultimatepheer
I think the change made in the LE where Aralakh Company is either damaged or straight-up gone if you save the Rachni was a good call. It feels a bit weird that you can do this mission and sacrifice Aralakh only for it not to matter in the original. And of course it makes a Failure run all the more potent.
JamesPicard
So, you've done everything you could have to ruin the future of the krogan race...and Wrex still thinks of you as a friend. And then Shep thinks about party members that have died due to his ignorance. I'm finding it hard to decide just how guilt-ridden Fail Shep would be at any given moment, especially since all of the chaos is intentional from the player's point of view...
EndarkCuli
In fairness to Wrex, he doesn't know you sabotaged the cure yet.
Peteman
EndarkCuli
Apologies for the delay. I've been feeling a bit under the weather lately. I'll try to post something tomorrow.
lrrose
EndarkCuli
Peteman
rottenvenetic
EndarkCuli
Peteman
There's going to be another delay. The bomb hasn't gone off yet and I'm running out of missions, so I'm going to have to go back a few missions and see if doing the first bomb mission is what triggers the countdown to massive EMS loss.
lrrose
Sikon
Fail Shep, so fail he fails at failing.
Peteman
Peteman
lrrose
Peteman
How many assets does Arralakh company even have at this point?
Peteman
25.
lrrose
Peteman
Yeah, I was surprised, but I guess that Aralakh can't go beneath 25.
lrrose
What would be a decent EMS?
montagohalcyon
You need over 1750 EMS to avoid the worst endings.
lrrose
As a side note, Jack shouts "I will destroy you!" when she shows up. It was a nice touch for a half-assed situation.
lrrose
lrrose
Well, here we go. We've seen our fair share of tragedies, most made hilarious due to the blatant disregard of common sense that led to them, as well as some victories. Mostly the accidental, plot-mandated kind of victories. But the final mission has begun, and it seems that this liveblog will soon be completed. It's been a blast to follow along with you, Irrose, and I wish you the best of luck for these final battles.
EndarkCuli
Final push should have Liara and James, given EDI's own projected mortality.
Peteman
lrrose
Peteman
And there it is: the final, major decision that we've been building up to over the course of three games. Either the end of all current civilizations will occur, or...the end of all current civilizations will occur, with a slightly higher survival rate in exchange for erasing a few thousand years of technology and progress (that would otherwise have just been left behind for future civilizations to learn from). Which shall it be? I suppose that I'll have to tune in next time and find out!
EndarkCuli
Peteman
I'm curious on how the Citadel DLC plays out with that many people killed. A lot of banter exists about how awesome they are, so with almost all of them dead, how much banter do we lose?
Peteman
I think you see Coats in the aftermath. IIRC, he picks up some dude's helmet.
Peteman
lrrose
And there we are. I think it was mentioned once that you considered doing some DLC to finish things off, but for all intents and purposes, Fail Shep's story has finally ended. The bonus details were a nice touch; I couldn't help but chuckle at the first 'died for your sins' line, even though its second use wasn't quite as jovial an occasion. I've had fun reading this blog of yours, Irrose, and I hope that you're proud of your work.
EndarkCuli
Peteman
EndarkCuli
I like the "He also wins big at the games, costing the casino money that Khan was planning on donating to refugees. "
Peteman
You know, the sad thing is, MF might actually do better than Fail Shep with saving the galaxy.
Peteman
ultimatepheer
Part of me thinks it should be Win Shepard, because I prefer 1 syllable names.
Peteman
There's no "I" in "team", but there is a "me".
Peteman
So, if Failure Shepard can be nicknamed "Fail" Shepard, does that mean Success Shepard can be nicknamed "Suck" Shepard?
Peteman
I was actually thinking of doing that, but decided against it because it would confuse me.
lrrose
EndarkCuli
And thank you for doing this. I think you can maximize the level of fail if you're willing to accept a few war assets, but this is plenty good also.
Peteman
montagohalcyon
And so, for real this time, ends Fail Shep's story. It's been a wild ride, and I've enjoyed reading alone. Thank you for sacrificing the universe for our own amusement, and I hope that you have a marvellous day.
EndarkCuli
Well done, I've been quietly following along for a while, and this has been a great source of enjoyment.
JobanGrayskull
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