Created By: AmuroNT1 on November 20, 2011 Last Edited By: DragonQuestZ on March 14, 2015

Men Are Bad At Sex

In sitcoms, the men are often portrayed as lousy lovers.

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Trope
If there's one constant of sitcoms and domcoms, it's that men will be depicted as stupid or insensitive. What's the best way to evidence both at the same time? Have the man be a lousy lover, of course. There are a few forms this takes, including:

  • Complete ignorance of female pleasure, usually coupled with the selfish assumption that only men enjoy sex.
  • Thinking that foreplay is something only women care about and just wanting to get straight to the main event.
  • Falling asleep immediately afterwards, the ultimate sign of insensitivity. note 

Contrast Latin Lover, who may be considered good at sex because Foreign People Are Sexy. Note that this isn't Hollywood Sex, but an In-Universe trope.

This trope has some Truth in Television, as it used to be generally accepted that women really did get nothing out of sex; this is the reason Lie Back and Think of England exists.


Examples:

Film

Live-Action TV
  • Occasionally on Friends. In one episode, the girls show the guys a diagram of all the female erogenous zones (unseen by the audience), and the guys are amazed that there are so many.
  • Misfits: Though Nikki never seemed to have any complaints, Curtis is described by Emma and Alisha as being bad in bed.
    • Alisha mimics Curtis' mastabatory behaviour being all focused on himself.
    • Through FlashBacks we see that Curtis was all about his own enjoyment and none of Emma's.
    • Nathan was also implied to be pretty bad in bed because he was too quick to finish, leaving the partner hanging.
    • Simon, on the other hand, has never had a complaint by either of his two partners.
  • Parodied on the 30 Rock episode "The Bubble." During a montage Liz and Drew are shown exiting the bedroom, she with a frustrated look on her face. She later tells Jack that Drew is "only as good at sex as I am", implying that women aren't immune from the trope either.

New Media
  • Spoofed by The Onion in an article about scientists discovering the female orgasm, which generally treats it like it's the Loch Ness Monster.

Western Animation
  • American Dad! uses this as a throwaway joke in the two-parter "Stan of Arabia". Francine sings a Torch Song about how much it sucks being a woman in a Muslim nation, at one point listing off various parts of the female anatomy. When she mentions the clitoris, one of Stan's Arab friends asks him what that is; Stan just shrugs.
  • Family Guy zig-zags this in regards to Peter. Some episodes imply that he's a wonderful lover, a few even suggesting that this is the main/only thing Lois sees in him. In others, it's played straight. In "PTV", when told that they can't kiss, move, or thrust during sex, Lois complains that that isn't sex; Peter sits there with a bored look on his face before announcing "I'm done" and instantly falling asleep on top of her. In another, when Lois becomes obese, she starts having a heart attack during sex, and Peter tries to "finish up" before he takes her to the hospital.
    • Stewie tries to get his future self to have sex with a co-worker, but he ends up spending almost the entirety of the experience crying (the actual sex only lasted eight seconds).
Community Feedback Replies: 23
  • November 20, 2011
    TonyG
    Comes up ocassionally on Friends. In one episode the girls show the guys a diagram of all the female erogenous zones (unseen by the audience), and the guys are amazed that there are so many. Another episode began with the guys comparing foreplay to the warm-up comedian before a concert, and the girls respond that if it weren't for the comedian, they would just as well be listening to the records at home.
  • November 20, 2011
    ParadiscaCorbasi
    • Misfits: Though Nikki never seemed to have any complaints, Curtis is described by Emma and Alisha as being bad in bed.
      • Alisha mimics Curtis' mastabatory behaviour being all focused on himself.
      • Through FlashBacks we see that Curtis was all about his own enjoyment and none of Emma's.
      • Nathan was also implied to be pretty bad in bed because he was too quick to finish, leaving the partner hanging.
      • Simon, on the other hand, has never had a complaint by either of his two partners.

  • November 20, 2011
    NESBoy
    • In Family Guy, Stewie tries to get his future self to have sex with a co-worker, but he ends up spending almost the entirety of the experience crying (the actual sex only lasted eight seconds).
  • November 20, 2011
    darkapothem2000
  • November 20, 2011
    randomsurfer
    Back in the eighties I read a spate of magazine or other articles which referred to men making women "sleep on the wet spot" after sex, and how that was uncouth. Don't remember where though - maybe The Joy of Sex (which is from the 70s) was one, but IDK for sure.
  • November 20, 2011
    bulmabriefs144
    Truth In T Television. Women can have multiple orgasms, while men's claim to fame can be replaced by any long, thick object.
  • November 21, 2011
    Koveras
    One of the reasons the Latin Lover trope exists is the belief that Hispanic men do not fall under this trope.
  • November 21, 2011
    Chabal2
    One element I've also seen is that men don't last long, with something like a few seconds from erection to orgasm to falling asleep.

    Mentioned very often in Dave Barry's works, most prominently in Complete Guide To Guys.

  • November 21, 2011
    TrustBen
    Parodied on the Thirty Rock episode "The Bubble." During a montage Liz and Drew are shown exiting the bedroom, she with a frustrated look on her face. She later tells Jack that Drew is "only as good at sex as I am", implying that women aren't immune from the trope either.
  • November 21, 2011
    darkclaw
    ^^^^ That seems to be kind of a crude, almost sexist statement in my opinion.

    Sure, women can have multiple orgasms...but it is harder to stimulate them to get such orgasms. Men can also enjoy sex, without multiple orgasms but the build-up is highly enjoyable for most.

    And yes, men's "claim to fame" can be replaced by any "long, thick object"...but really, there are also sex toys for men (example) and there is always the internet and A Date With Rosie Palms for any sex. And if you wanted to be really crude, a woman's claim to fame can be replaced by something with a hole. Probably doesn't sound too good to say, right?

    Due to that, I think this trope should stay In-Universe and have No Real Life Examples Please as it is far, FAR too easy for this to start gaining Unfortunate Implications (like reducing men or women to their "Claims to fame").

    Also, about the sleepiness Truth In Television bit...you can stay awake after orgasming if you're a guy. It's actually pretty easy to fall asleep or stay awake depending on what you focus on, I find. Anyways, I'd rather stay objective and not put my personal experiences in here but just thought I'd say it.
  • November 21, 2011
    ayjazz
    One issue that can be brought up is the inability "to last" during sex, leaving a disappointed female. This can usually be done because of an inexperienced male, or simply out of apathy.
  • November 21, 2011
    AmuroNT1
    darkclaw: Well yes, my whole point was this is an In Universe trope, like Global Ignorance. It's kind of hard to cite real life examples without getting into gossip.

    Another example, BTW: Family Guy zig-zags with this in regards to Peter. Some episodes imply that he's a wonderful lover, a few even suggesting that this is the main/only thing Lois sees in him. In others, he plays it straight. In "PTV", when told that they can't kiss, move, or thrust during sex, Lois complains about how you can consider that sex; Peter sits there with a bored look on his face before announcing "I'm done" and instantly falling asleep on top of her. In another, when Lois becomes obese, she starts having a heart attack during sex, and Peter tries to "finish up" before he takes her to the hospital.
  • November 22, 2011
    fulltimeD
    Only every post-eighties sitcom, ever...
  • November 23, 2011
    surgoshan
    • A psychological survey was conducted a few decades back in which grad students would walk up to a stranger of the opposite sex and say "I've noticed you around campus and find you very attractive; would you like to go back to my room and have sex?" Men said yes, women said no, the study concluded that A Man Is Always Eager and All Women Are Prudes, and the country either rolled their eyes or proclaimed themselves vindicated. Time passed and another, more sophisticated study was done that showed that men and women both like sex, but when approached by a stranger, they're doing different risk/reward calculations. A man approached by a women has little reason to fear rape and murder and every reason to expect a decent sexual encounter whereas women have much more to fear and lower expectations of a decent encounter. However, the stronger of the two reactions was the concern that the person was a crazy person rather than that he's probably bad in bed.
  • February 24, 2013
    Megaptera
    Oops, thread necromancy. Never mind. D:
  • February 24, 2013
    Oof
    Why isn't this a trope?

    Okay, I'm grabbing it.
  • February 24, 2013
    StarSword
    @Megaptera: The whole idea of YKTTW is to submit ideas for new tropes. There's no such thing as necroing here; in fact, just posting YKTTW Bump is perfectly acceptable.
  • February 24, 2013
    Oof
    I don't know why the [[note]]tag isn't working[[/note]].
  • February 25, 2013
    randomsurfer
    ^Note-tag is one of several markups which don't work in ykttw, along with hottip, folders, special characters... (Parenthetically, one of the markups which does work in ykttw is strikethrough, which doesn't work in Mainspace.)
  • February 25, 2013
    Oof
    Got it, thanks.
  • March 14, 2015
    Gowan
    • In one Oglaf strip, a village needs someone to "satisfy the snow queen" to end the winter. The males are so unimaginative that at least one of them gets his private parts frozen, as the snow queen is exactly as cold as the name implies. Along comes a lesbian in warm winter clothes, who keeps the clothes on and uses a sex toy. Problem solved. (The trope is averted almost everwhere else in Oglaf, but that's the only straight example I could think of.)

    • In A Brothers Price, this trope is played straight with Keifer Porter (who is a jerk, and likely doesn't bother to try), and averted with Jerin, whose grandfather taught him the "paths of pleasure" ... in other terms, the art of keeping multiple wives happy by using his hands and mouth in creative ways.

  • March 14, 2015
    Wheezy
    I think we could put important real life examples, like the one about the university study, in the analysis section. Because IMO, the origins of this trope really do deserve a thorough and objective look.
  • March 14, 2015
    DragonQuestZ
    I put a real laconic line in the OP.
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