Line #125 Quotes/LaserGuidedKarma


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4
5	->'''Edgar ([[DomesticAbuse to his wife]])''': I go out, I work my butt off to make a living, all I want is to come home to a nice clean house with a nice fat steak on the table, but instead I get this -- this -- I don't even know what you call this! I'll tell you what it looks like, it looks like poison. [[HypocriticalHumour Don't you take that away, I'm eating that, damn it!]] It is poison, isn't it? I swear to God, I would not be surprised if it was, the way you skulk around here like a dog been hit too much -- or ain't been hit enough, I can't make up my mind. You're useless, Beatrice! The only thing that pulls its weight around here is my goddamn truck!
6	->''[a flaming UFO slams into the pickup parked in the drive, obliterating it in an explosion, Edgar rushes out to the front door]''
7	->'''Edgar''': [[LampshadeHanging Figures.]]
8	-->-- ''Film/MenInBlack''
9
10	->''"Instant karma's gonna get you''\
11	''Gonna knock you right on the head''\
12	''You better get yourself together''\
13	''Pretty soon [[KarmicDeath you're gonna be dead]]"''
14	-->-- '''Music/JohnLennon''', "Instant Karma"
15
16	->''Well, when justice strikes''\
17	''Well, every once in a while''\
18	''It makes a bullseye hit''\
19	''Well, every once in a while''
20	-->-- '''Music/{{Devo}}''', "Jimmy"
21
22	->''The advertising quack who wearies\
23	[[SnakeOilSalesman With tales of countless cures,]]\
24	His teeth, I've enacted,\
25	[[MeatgrinderSurgery Shall all be extracted]]\
26	[[BackAlleyDoctor By terrified amateurs.]]''
27	-->-- ''Theatre/TheMikado''
28
29	->''Well, you may throw your rock and hide your hand\
30	Workin' in the dark against your fellow man\
31	But as sure as God made black and white\
32	What's done in the dark will be brought to the light''
33	-->--'''Music/JohnnyCash''', "God's Gonna Cut You Down"
34
35	->Be not deceived; [[DoNotTauntCthulhu God is not mocked]]: for [[HoistByHisOwnPetard whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.]]
36	-->--''Literature/TheBible'', '''Galatians 6:7''', King James Version
37
38	->Tell the righteous it will be well with them, for they will enjoy the fruit of their deeds. Woe to the wicked! Disaster is upon them! They will be paid back for what their hands have done.
39	-->--''Literature/TheBible'', '''[[Literature/BookOfIsaiah Isaiah 3:10 - 11]]''', New International Version
40
41	->''I've received my comeuppance at last!''
42	-->--'''Dan Halen''', ''WesternAnimation/{{Squidbillies}}''
43
44	->''My bad, homie. I picked C. Ain't that a bitch?''
45	-->--'''Franklin Clinton''', ''VideoGame/GrandTheftAutoV''
46
47	->''Evil deeds have a way of making their way back to us. Prepare yourself.''
48	-->--'''T. Hawk''', to [[BigBad M. Bison]], ''Super VideoGame/StreetFighterIV''
49
50	->''Have you ever heard of karmatic justice? Remember… what goes around comes around.''
51	-->--'''Kitaro''', ''[[Manga/GeGeGeNoKitaro GeGeGe no Kitaro (2018)]]''
52
53	->''The first and most important rule of gun-running is: never get shot with your own merchandise.''
54	-->--'''Yuri Orlov''', ''Film/LordOfWar''
55
56	->''A basic rule of covert ops is let someone else do your dirty work. Let someone else find the guy you want to kill. It's a great technique… as long as [[HiredToHuntYourself you're not the "someone else."]]''
57	-->--'''Michael''', ''Series/BurnNotice'' ("False Flag")
58
59	->''No matter how she hurts people, she ends up getting hurt the worst!''
60	-->--'''Mitsuru Tsuwabuki''', on [[AlphaBitch Nanami Kiryuu]], ''Anime/RevolutionaryGirlUtena''
61
62	->You felt your sins crawling on your back.
63	-->--'''VideoGame/{{Undertale}}''', against the FinalBoss of the No Mercy route.[[note]]In context, this message means something along the lines of "ThisIsGonnaSuck". [[SNKBoss The comment is completely warranted.]][[/note]]
64
65	->'''[[SociopathicHero Shadow Stalker]]:''' Why?\
66	'''[[PeoplePuppets Regent]]:''' [[TeensAreMonsters You fucked]] with [[PetTheDog my teammate]].
67	-->-- '''Regent''' explaining why he is about to [[NeverSuicide fake Shadow Stalker's suicide]], ''Literature/{{Worm}}'' [[http://parahumans.wordpress.com/2012/05/15/interlude-10/ Interlude 10]]
68
69	->''The funny thing about karma… It goes round and round… and in the end, it comes back to bite you.''
70	-->--'''Roland''', ''VideoGame/DigitalDevilSaga''
71
72	->''"You know the kind of the guy who does nothing but bad things and then wonders why his life sucks? Well, that was me. Every time something good happened to me, something bad was just waiting around the corner. Karma. [[HeelRealization That's when I realized I had to change.]] So I made a list of everything bad I've ever done and one-by-one [[TheAtoner I'm gonna make up for all my mistakes]]. I'm just trying to be a better person. My name is Earl."''
73	-->--Opening Narration, ''Series/MyNameIsEarl''
74
75	->The thing about karma on the Literature/{{Discworld}} is that it often happens real soon.
76	-->--'''The Discworld Companion''', on the events of ''Literature/GuardsGuards''
77
78	->''Hey, everybody! Look at this! It's that boy who laughs at everyone! Let's laugh at ''him''!''
79	-->--'''Ian, The Very Tall Man''', referring to a pantsed '''Nelson Muntz''', ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'', ''[[Recap/TheSimpsonsS7E2122ShortFilmsAboutSpringfield 22 Short Films About Springfield]]''
80
81	->''Lousy rotten karmic retribution!''
82	-->--'''Homer Simpson''', whenever he ends up getting caught by the police for destroying things, ''VideoGame/TheSimpsonsHitAndRun''
83
84	->''"They deserve that!"''
85	-->--'''WesternAnimation/JohnnyTest''' after seeing an episode's villains being forced to sniff their own armpits.
86
87	->''So tell me how you're sleeping easy\
88	How you're only thinking of yourself\
89	Show me how you justify\
90	Telling all your lies like second nature\
91	Listen, mark my words, one day (one day)\
92	You will pay, you will pay\
93	Karma's gonna come [[HumiliationConga collect your debt]]!''
94	-->--[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rbrq260Sx00 "Wolf in Sheep's Clothing"]] by '''Music/{{Set It Off\|Band}}'''
95
96	->[[AttentionWhore Darren]]'s Wikipedia page was back up, but locked after continual editing abuse. He also had a few hundred followers on Twitter, but none anyone would care to meet in the flesh if their communications were any display of personality. But now, after months of intensive work with one of the most complex delusional patients he had even encountered, Dr. Bernard P Basset had achieved that moment of acceptance.
97	->Only minutes after that crucial breakthrough session, however, the psychiatrist had been forced to call for immediate security assistance when Darren finally acknowledged – fully, totally and wholly – that when he had killed "[[KarmicTrickster the witch]]," [[NoOntologicalInertia he had effectively lifted]] "[[{{Curse}} the curse]]." He was not in fact [[{{Unperson}} forgotten at all]]. But neither would he ever be remembered for anything other than his madness, his depravity, his failure.
98	-->--''Forgotten,'' by Muriel Gray
99
100	->'''John Constantine:''' I see it all now. All the angles. All the little people you've fucked over — all the innocent lives you've destroyed in your scramble for [[{{Greed}} money]] and [[AmbitionIsEvil power]] and [[TheHedonist nasty kicks]] [[KarmaHoudini without consequences]]. Well, ''[[KarmaHoudiniWarranty I'm]]'' [[KarmaHoudiniWarranty the fucking consequences]], sunshine. And I'm thinking [[EvilSorcerer Mako]] [[UnstoppableRage won't be too chuffed]] that you got him trapped in that Soul Cage for all eternity. Your [[ArtificialAfterlife private heaven]] just turned into a private hell, mate… and Mako's the devil. [[SeeYouInHell Give him my best when you get there, won't you?]]
101	->'''Lord Burnham:''' [''dying''] [--[[AintTooProudToBeg A-Anything… I'll give you anything… I can make you rich…]]--]
102	->'''John Constantine:''' You made your own bed, Burnham. Fuckin' ''lie'' in it.
103	-->--''ComicBook/{{Hellblazer}}: The Roots Of Coincidence''
104
105	->'''David:''' <[[OhCrap No, no, no.]] [[ThisCannotBe You guys aren't going to do this!]]>
106	->'''Jake:''' You tried to kill us. You threatened to turn us over to Visser Three. Not to mention what you've done to Saddler's family.
107	->'''David:''' <[[VillainousBreakdown You can't judge me! You're not God!]]>
108	->'''Jake:''' David, we have fought the Yeerks for a long time now. [[ShellShockedVeteran It seems like forever.]] We are not going to let you beat us. We are going to save the human race if we can. There are larger issues… more important…
109	->'''Rachel:''' We're [[AndIMustScream doing to you]] what [[ShapeshifterModeLock you were trying to do to us]]. Law of the jungle: eat or be eaten.
110	-->--''Literature/{{Animorphs}} #22: The Solution''
111
112	->''So I came home early to surprise you\
113	And I tiptoed over to your bedroom\
114	Where I found you there\
115	His fingers running through your hair\
116	\
117	And so I walked out\
118	Took a couple months for me to calm down\
119	While you were moving on with your new love affair\
120	Life can treat me so unfair\
121	\
122	Til my friends called me up and they told me the news\
123	He came home smelling like another perfume\
124	It turns out that cheaters get cheated on too\
125	Cause he cheated on you''
126	-->--'''Grayson [=DeWolfe=]''', "Karma"
127
128	->''Karma works fast out here''
129	-->'''Miles''', [[https://www.gocomics.com/crabgrass/2020/10/07 in this]] ''ComicStrip/{{Crabgrass}}'' comic
130
131	->''I won't take your bait\
132	No need to make you pay\
133	'Cause karma's gonna help me anyway\
134	Watch out, Karma's what you make!''
135	-->--''WebAnimation/CloverLoveHopeFaithAndLuck'', "Karma"
136
137	->''"If someone has wronged you - do not take revenge, wait and see how fate will avenge you."''
138	-->-- '''Creator/{{Laozi}}'''
139
140	->''He that scatters thorns, let him not go barefoot.''
141	-->--'''Creator/BenjaminFranklin''', ''Poor Richard's Almanack'' (1736)
142
143	->''"Wait? What's that sound? I dunno, call me crazy, but I think that's the sound of the universe coming back into balance."''
144	-->--'''LetsPlay/SlimKirby''' [[labelnote:Explanation]][=SlimKirby=] is notorious for having lost in a game of ''VideoGame/MarioParty'' by one coin. During LetsPlay/TheRunawayGuys's playthrough of ''Mario Party 1'', Chuggaa won the penultimate board by one coin, and was quite the LargeHam about it. In ''Mario Party 5'', however, Chuggaa recently lost in a game of ''Mario Party'' by one coin.[[/labelnote]]
145
146	-> I work at a restaurant on a major thoroughfare. To get to work, I have to go through a six-lane intersection.\
147	I’m sitting at the light, waiting for it to turn green. About two cars ahead and one row over is very large, jacked-up truck with every loud and obnoxious bell and whistle you could think of.\
148	The millisecond that the light turns green, the truck lays on his horn. When the cars in front of him start moving, he revs his engine and releases a large cloud of dark exhaust before he guns it. The four or so cars around me, myself included, are encased in the cloud, and can’t see anything, causing us to have to sit for a moment until the cloud dissipates.\
149	Then, the cop car behind me puts on his lights and siren, and chases the truck down.\
150	And that, children, is called instant karma.
151	-->-- '''Website/NotAlwaysRight''', ''[[https://notalwaysright.com/karma-by-the-truckload/121188/ Karma By The Truckload]]''
152
153	->''"Karma police, arrest this man."''
154	-->-- '''Music/{{Radiohead}}''', [[Music/OKComputer "Karma Police"]]
155
156	->'''Leo:''' What are you smiling at?\
157	'''Josh:''' Nothing, it's just... ''[grinning smugly]'' Toby got the stamp assignment.\
158	''[Toby and Leo share an unamused look]''\
159	'''Toby:''' Leo, I could use some help on this.\
160	'''Leo:''' Take Josh. ''[Walks off]''\
161	'''Toby:''' Thanks. ''[To Josh]'' Congratulations, you're choosing the next stamp. ''[Walks off in the opposite direction]''\
162	'''Josh:''' ''[Stunned]'' ... Wow that happened ''fast''.
163	-->--''Series/TheWestWing'', "Galileo"
164
165	->''"The punishment must fit the crime. All right, Anthony, you wanted pasta from my magic pasta pot, and ''I'' want to sleep in my little bed tonight. So start eating."''
166	-->--''Literature/StregaNona''

Context Quotes / LaserGuidedKarma