Line #33 Funny/TheOfficeUK


1	* Classic ones are probably "Free Love on the Free Love Freeway" and David's dancing. Oh, that dancing... shudder.
2	* From the very first episode: "He's put my stapler inside a jelly again!"
3	* Keith, on the differences between British and American English:
4	-->'''Keith:''' Word of warning then, out there they call them "fanny packs"...\
5	''[pause]''\
6	'''Keith:''' Cause fanny means your arse over there...\
7	''[extremely long pause]''\
8	'''Keith:''' ... not your minge.\
9	''[takes a bite of a scotch egg]''
10	* Keith's performance review is pretty funny too...
11	-->'''David:''' Under "strengths", you've written "Accounting"... and under 'weaknesses' you've put 'eczema'.
12	* Absolutely anything in the "Training" episode, "I THINK THERE'S BEEN A RAPE UP THERE!"
13	** And Gareth is taking notes.
14	** Discussing the idea of ultimate fantasies, the trainer says he'd like an island, David waffles about time travel, and Gareth declares "Two lesbians, sisters - I'm just watching." Following an awkward silence, Tim declares he'd like to hear more from Gareth, for once. And you can see a very small smile on Gareth's face.
15	* The Series Two episode where Gareth puts a very sexual phone call on speakerphone accidentally. Made even funnier by Tim's absolutely flabbergasted face.
16	* Gareth's rambling about the imaginary sniper on the roof across from David's senile dad's retirement home.
17	* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FsvkEn-6Y5w If you don't know me by know...]]
18	* David explaining how hard it would be to try to be funny when he just got fired. He even shows his (probably expensive) "chicken rider" outfit, and even though your heart breaks you can't help but to suffocate from laughing.
19	* Tim gluing Gareth's phone for a laugh. And then Gareth prying the phone open to answer it.
20	* For us literary nerds, there's this line: "Tim Canterbury...''Literature/TheCanterburyTales''. By [[Creator/GeoffreyChaucer Chaucer.]] And [[Creator/WilliamShakespeare Shakespeare.]]" Coupled with the fact that it took Creator/RickyGervais and Creator/MartinFreeman over 25 takes to film that scene because they kept cracking up.
21	* After a particularly tragic night out at Chasers, Gareth is seen riding home in the sidecar with a couple for some ThreeWaySex. His face as he passes the camera is a thing of beauty.
22	* David Brent telling Jennifer what a brilliant person Finchy is, then putting him on speakerphone and having to backpedal on what he'd just said. And Finchy jokingly says "stop looking up her skirt" as Davids eyes begin to wander.
23	* Gareth's cringe-worthy attempt at courting Rachel even though she's seeing Tim. He then compromises with:
24	-->"If you do go all the way with Tim and you want me to go in ''(points at her crotch)'' there straight afterwards, make sure he wears a condom. It's sort of a rule."
25	** Quesioning what Rachel sees in Tim, Gareth declars his colleague looks "like a little Fisher-Price man".
26	* David's attempts to endear himself to the Swindon branch by telling as many jokes as he can. The deafening silence he gets allows for Tim to let out a very audible "ooh..."
27	** He later tries to overcompensate by telling a joke about a black man's cock. Then a black employee turns up and David goes quiet. Jennifer finds out though and reprimands David.
28	** David then jokes about how Jennifer needs to mellow out, possibly with some "wacky-backy". He's ''immediately'' brought back in for another scolding.
29	* Gareth playing with his "Dirty Bertie" toy. He finds it hilarious, but Tim finds it annoying. Then when Tim's recommending Gareth for the manager's position, you can hear Gareth playing with Bertie some more. The guy's his own worst enemy.
30	* David going on a blind date. He says that the woman he's looking for is wearing a white scarf. When he glances behind him and sees an obese, middle-aged woman wearing a white scarf, he mutters "Oh, for fuck's sake".
31	* In the Christmas special part 2 he tells another obese lady, "I've got a blind date, and I thought you were it."
32	* And his phone-call to another woman, where he tells her that he was in a documentary called [[TitleDrop "The Office"]].
33	--> "God, you're not that awful boss, are you?"
34	* Anne not just describing to Tim but ''demonstrating'' how she angled herself so as to get her husband’s penis deep inside her enough to conceive. Tim just stares into space, wishing it would end.
35	** The Anne-Tim non-relationship generally, with her epic self-absorption.
36	--->'''Anne''': I went to a lot of places over the years, and the ''number'' of infatuations blokes have had over me, oh God. I mean they know they can't have me, but it don’t stop 'em. I dunno what it is about me they like so much.
37	--->'''Tim''': Yeah...I've been racking my brains.
38	** There is also the delightful moment when Anne finally gets put in her place by Glyn (the warehouse foreman) after hectoring him about smoking near her at the office party. Watch Tim trying hard not to laugh:
39	--->'''Glyn''': You think we care as much about your baby as you do? Just cos you let some useless tosser blow his beans up your muff? Well done! Merry fuckin' Christmas!
40	* One post-credits shot shows that Tim's screen-saver is scrolling text that says "Gareth is a Benny".
41	* After Gareth becomes manager, Tim nicks the keys to his office and locks him in. The kicker? This isn't the first time he's done it.
42	* David going on a date-night. Dressed as Film/AustinPowers. Guess how well that goes.
43	* David showing Donna how to use email by demonstrating on an employee's computer. He opens up a message and Donna cracks up laughing. It's then revealed that the message was a pornographic picture with David's face in it. When David demands to know who has seen this, everyone raises their hands. Including the cleaning lady - who doesn't even have email.
44	* "You're not all going to lose your jobs. Look, ''(To one employee)'' '''you're''' not going to lose your job, ''(To another employee)'' '''you're''' not going to lose your job, ''(To another employee)'' you know, uh... ''(Skipping over Malcolm, an employee David had an antagonistic relationship with)'' '''you're''' not going to lose your job..."
45	* When the female employees are talking about what kinds of men they find attractive, Shy accountant Sheila says "I like blacks", with Oliver (the office black-guy) sitting right next to her. He suddenly looks rather nervous.
46	* When David is hired to be a motivational speaker. He comes in dressed like a homie, acts extremely flamboyant without offering any substantial advice and runs out of the room with "Simply the Best" by Music/TinaTurner playing him out. Watching him pose for photos is pretty funny as well.
47	* When Neil and Rachel are performing a ''Film/SaturdayNightFever''-style dance for charity, [[GreenEyedMonster David's reaction]] is "That looks gay".
48	* Neil bakes a birthday cake for one of the office women and David is overheard sniping: "I prefer a flan!"
49	* Gareth and Tim's discussion about whether Tim's position (Senior Sales Rep) outranks Gareth's (Team Leader):
50	-->'''Tim:''' It's a title someone has given you to get you to do something they don't want to do for free. It's like making the div kid at school milk monitor. No one respects it.
51	--> '''Gareth:''' Er yes they do, because if people were rude to me, then I used to give them their milk last, when it was warm.
52	* David and Gareth's conversation with Alex (the soon to be fired forklift driver) about the differences between dwarfs, midgets and elves. Alex storms out, then the guy repairing Brent's computer chimes in:
53	--> So what's a goblin?

Context Funny / TheOfficeUK