1 | * You know what? The Accountant. Just the Accountant. |
2 | ** The Accountant's very first line in the film. |
3 | --->'''The Accountant:''' You, fat fuck! |
4 | ** When the first stoner reacts to him bursting from his overturned car. |
5 | --->'''Stoner #1:''' Jesus! |
6 | --->'''The Accountant:''' [[LiteralMinded Carpenter. And, despite what you've heard, prefers short hair.]] |
7 | ** And then when he is addressing the two stoners. |
8 | --->'''Stoner #2:''' You almost fuckin' killed me, man! |
9 | --->'''The Accountant:''' Not even close. I won't see you again until you're seventy-three. (''looks over at the other guy'') You I'll see in three months. (''walks away'') |
10 | --->'''Stoner #1:''' What does that mean?! |
11 | ** This exchange between the Accountant and one of the cultists after the former notices the latter's pentagram tattoo: |
12 | ---> '''Accountant''': What's that? |
13 | ---> '''Cultist''': A symbol of our pact with Lord {{Satan}}. |
14 | ---> '''Accountant''': A pact, huh? Funny; he's never mentioned you. (''looks at the Cultist's shattered legs'') Whoa, those are fucked! |
15 | ** After the Accountant interrupts the police trying to apprehend Milton and Piper (thereby allowing them to escape), he whips out his coin, tosses it into the air, and it becomes a FBI badge which he shows to the police captain, and we get this exchange: |
16 | --->'''Captain''': No goddamn way! Ain't no goddamn way in God's good Heaven are you a FBI agent! |
17 | --->'''Accountant''': Gentlemen, I need you boys to stand down. Captain, you know what this badge means, right? Federal Bureau of Get-the-Fuck-Out-of-My-Way! You boys just bungled into an ongoing investigation. |
18 | *** The Accountant then exposes one of the cops as a cultist working for King and tells him to call him. When the cop/cultist does, the Accountant leans in close to hear. |
19 | ** "'Forever?' If your definition of 'forever' is the next five seconds, then you'd probably be right." |
20 | ** The Accountant's reaction when Piper gets free from his grasp, grabs the Godkiller, and trains it on him. |
21 | --->'''Accountant''': Well! |
22 | ** [[SoundtrackDissonance "That's the way / Uh-HUH-Uh-HUH / I LIKE it / Uh-HUH-Uh-HUH..."]] Bopping along to disco while driving a massive truck through a roadblock and causing a massive fireball in your wake? Only this guy. |
23 | * It may have [[CrossesTheLineTwice crossed the line twice]], but Milton firing at and killing several [[{{Mooks}} assailants]] while doing [[CoitusUninterruptus his special oil check]] on the waitress Candy AND drinking scotch was nothing short of side-splitting. |
24 | ** The drinking whiskey also being in slow motion lets you know that they knew exactly what kind of movie this was. |
25 | ** Even before the shootout, they're going at it in the room right next to Piper's, and the walls [[TheImmodestOrgasm do absolutely nothing to dampen the sound]], much to Piper's chagrin. |
26 | ** At one point in the shootout, a mook uses a [[ShockAndAwe cattle prod]] on Milton, and the shock channels through his body into Candy's, resulting in probably the single greatest orgasm she'll ever experience for the rest of her life. |
27 | ** This is also hilarious later on when the shell-shocked waitress is trying to explain what happened to the cops. |
28 |
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