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* As we know vampires are blood-suckers. Unfortunately, blood doesn't have too much nutrients. Vampire bats, who subsists exclusively on blood, often drink so much that they're unable to fly properly without peeing it out - same for others like ticks and mosquitos. This means a vampire needs to drink alot of blood to maintain a healthy lifestyle. In addition, such an exclusive diet that only contains bodily liquids means vampires won't be able to spread very far geographically. This is especially true if such areas lack large game, or do not have the kind of environment that can support livestock. For example, in Mesoamerica, some researchers theorize the main reason why the Aztecs performed human sacrifice was so they can substitute their need for protein with a diet of human flesh, due to the lack of domestic animals larger than the llama or alpaca that could be used to feed a large population of people.
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* As we know vampires are blood-suckers. Unfortunately, blood doesn't have too much nutrients. Vampire bats, who subsists exclusively on blood, often drink so much that they're unable to fly properly without peeing it out - same for others like ticks and mosquitos. This means a vampire needs to drink alot of blood to maintain a healthy lifestyle. In addition, such an exclusive diet that only contains bodily liquids means vampires won't be able to spread very far geographically. This is especially true if such areas lack large game, or do not have the kind of environment that can support livestock. livestock farmed for blood. Humans on the other hand, are able to thrive in multiple environments, including deserts, arctics and small islands, because our omnivorous diets allow us to subsist on a wide variety of different foods. As a result, the only way a vampire can Vampires, on the other hand, would never be able to reach the same population density as people due
For example, in Mesoamerica, some researchers theorize the main reason why the Aztecs performed human sacrifice was so they can substitute their need for protein with a diet of human flesh, due to the lack of domestic animals larger than the llama or alpaca that could be used to feed a large population of people.
For example, in Mesoamerica, some researchers theorize the main reason why the Aztecs performed human sacrifice was so they can substitute their need for protein with a diet of human flesh, due to the lack of domestic animals larger than the llama or alpaca that could be used to feed a large population of people.
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Changed line(s) 119,120 (click to see context) from:
* As we know vampires are blood-suckers. Unfortunately, blood doesn't have too much nutrients. Vampire bats, who subsists exclusively on blood, often drink so much that they're unable to fly properly without peeing it out - same for others like ticks and mosquitos. This means a vampire needs to drink alot of blood to maintain a healthy lifestyle. In addition, such an exclusive diet that only contains bodily liquids means vampires won't be able to spread very far geographically. This is especially true if such areas lack large game, or do not have the kind of environment that can support livestock.
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* As we know vampires are blood-suckers. Unfortunately, blood doesn't have too much nutrients. Vampire bats, who subsists exclusively on blood, often drink so much that they're unable to fly properly without peeing it out - same for others like ticks and mosquitos. This means a vampire needs to drink alot of blood to maintain a healthy lifestyle. In addition, such an exclusive diet that only contains bodily liquids means vampires won't be able to spread very far geographically. This is especially true if such areas lack large game, or do not have the kind of environment that can support livestock. For example, in Mesoamerica, some researchers theorize the main reason why the Aztecs performed human sacrifice was so they can substitute their need for protein with a diet of human flesh, due to the lack of domestic animals larger than the llama or alpaca that could be used to feed a large population of people.
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* Most vampires are portrayed as vastly powerful, ultra intelligent monsters capable of taking over the planet if they so desired (best illustrated in the World of Darkness series, and numerous literature and horror movies). However, there are a few problems with this idea:
1. As we know vampires are blood-suckers. Unfortunately, blood doesn't have too much nutrients. This means a vampire needs to drink alot of blood to maintain a healthy lifestyle. In addition, such an exclusive diet that only contains bodily liquids means vampires won't be able to spread very far geographically without starving themselves from lack of food.
1. As we know vampires are blood-suckers. Unfortunately, blood doesn't have too much nutrients. This means a vampire needs to drink alot of blood to maintain a healthy lifestyle. In addition, such an exclusive diet that only contains bodily liquids means vampires won't be able to spread very far geographically without starving themselves from lack of food.
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[[WMG: Vampires are completely dependent on humanity for their success]]
* Most vampires are portrayed as vastly powerful, ultra intelligent monsters capable of taking over the planet if they so desired (best illustrated in the World of Darkness series, and numerous literature and horror movies). However, there are a few problems with this idea:
1. As we know vampires are blood-suckers. Unfortunately, blood doesn't have too much nutrients. This means a vampire needs to drink alot of blood to maintain a healthy lifestyle. In addition, such an exclusive diet that only contains bodily liquids means vampires won't be able to spread very far geographically without starving themselves from lack of food.
* Most vampires are portrayed as vastly powerful, ultra intelligent monsters capable of taking over the planet if they so desired (best illustrated in the World of Darkness series, and numerous literature and horror movies). However, there are a few problems with this idea:
1. As we know vampires are blood-suckers. Unfortunately, blood doesn't have too much nutrients. This means a vampire needs to drink alot of blood to maintain a healthy lifestyle. In addition, such an exclusive diet that only contains bodily liquids means vampires won't be able to spread very far geographically without starving themselves from lack of food.
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*But aren't werewolves stronger in the moon?
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[[WMG: Vampires are disease elementals that get stronger during times of plague]]
Consider:
*In the Middle Ages, vampires were portrayed as disgusting, rotting, diseased. This is also the time in which disgusting, disfiguring diseases were widespread.
*By Victorian times, vampires became pale and consumptive looking. During Victorian times tuberculosis was fairly common.
*Today, when AIDS and other STD's are becoming the new epidemic, vampires are associated with sex.
Coincidence?
Consider:
*In the Middle Ages, vampires were portrayed as disgusting, rotting, diseased. This is also the time in which disgusting, disfiguring diseases were widespread.
*By Victorian times, vampires became pale and consumptive looking. During Victorian times tuberculosis was fairly common.
*Today, when AIDS and other STD's are becoming the new epidemic, vampires are associated with sex.
Coincidence?
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* "In the same way He took the cup also after supper, saying, 'This cup is the new covenant in My blood; do this, as often as you drink it, in remembrance of Me.'" 1 Corinthians 11:25. Jesus Christ: Time-Travelling Reverse Vampire?
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* Crosses kill vampires. Crosses kill Jesus. Ergo: Jesus was a vampire.
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[[WMG: The Entire [[BuffyTheVampireSlayer Buffyverse]] is real.]]
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[[WMG: The Entire [[BuffyTheVampireSlayer [[Series/BuffyTheVampireSlayer Buffyverse]] is real.]]
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[[WMG: Jesus was a vampire]]
He championed the drinking of his blood in return for eternal life, came back from the dead, and didn't like crosses.
* It is possible his 'ascending to heaven' was just him burning up in the sun; it would have looked spectacular to his followers.
He championed the drinking of his blood in return for eternal life, came back from the dead, and didn't like crosses.
* It is possible his 'ascending to heaven' was just him burning up in the sun; it would have looked spectacular to his followers.
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Alternatively:
* "Hemos"-Catch-all term for a blood-sucker.
* "Hemo Bestiary"-An animal that is turned into a vampire. For example, a chubacabra is a goat-vampire.
* "Hemo Lite"-Watered down vampires. Like in Twilight.
* "Uber-Hemo"-Vampires not originating from the traditional vampire method. May be the result of a DealWithTheDevil. They usually have Dracula as an example, and are much stronger than the average vampire.
* "Hemos"-Catch-all term for a blood-sucker.
* "Hemo Bestiary"-An animal that is turned into a vampire. For example, a chubacabra is a goat-vampire.
* "Hemo Lite"-Watered down vampires. Like in Twilight.
* "Uber-Hemo"-Vampires not originating from the traditional vampire method. May be the result of a DealWithTheDevil. They usually have Dracula as an example, and are much stronger than the average vampire.
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* Dracula-A title given to the King of Vampires. Has the same qualities as an Upgraded Vampire, except more boosted. Likely have a OneWingedAngel form.
* [[HornyDevils Succubi/Incubi]]-Could be considered the demonic cousin of a vampire. Feed on sex instead of blood.
* [[HornyDevils Succubi/Incubi]]-Could be considered the demonic cousin of a vampire. Feed on sex instead of blood.
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* Alternatively, they're animal vampires.
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* [[TakeThat Force them to read Twilight. They'll stay dead out of pure shame.]]
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* Destroy any SoulJars, ArtifactsOfDoom, and other RingOfPower. Nuke their HauntedCastle. Dig a great big hole where their Haunted Castle was; so that if it reforms, it falls in. Keeps explosives at the bottom of the hole.
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* Destroy any SoulJars, SoulJar, ArtifactsOfDoom, and other RingOfPower. Nuke their HauntedCastle. Dig a great big hole where their Haunted Castle was; so that if it reforms, it falls in. Keeps explosives at the bottom of the hole.
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[[WMG: If you really, really, really REALLY want to make that vampire stay dead]]
Stake the heart, chop off the head, chop off the limbs, hands, fingers, drives nails in the hands, fill the mouth with garlic, consecrate the grave, thermite the body; do a couple of exorcisms just to be safe; drop their socks and other articles of clothing into a river; mix the ashes with silver, and launch the mixture into the sun.
* Destroy any SoulJars, ArtifactsOfDoom, and other RingOfPower. Nuke their HauntedCastle. Dig a great big hole where their Haunted Castle was; so that if it reforms, it falls in. Keeps explosives at the bottom of the hole.
** Journey to the Underworld. Bind/Destroy/Redeem their souls, whichever works best.
Stake the heart, chop off the head, chop off the limbs, hands, fingers, drives nails in the hands, fill the mouth with garlic, consecrate the grave, thermite the body; do a couple of exorcisms just to be safe; drop their socks and other articles of clothing into a river; mix the ashes with silver, and launch the mixture into the sun.
* Destroy any SoulJars, ArtifactsOfDoom, and other RingOfPower. Nuke their HauntedCastle. Dig a great big hole where their Haunted Castle was; so that if it reforms, it falls in. Keeps explosives at the bottom of the hole.
** Journey to the Underworld. Bind/Destroy/Redeem their souls, whichever works best.
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* In any case, the cross only became a holy symbol because Jesus was crucified on one. That makes this one heck of a StableTimeLoop.
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[[WMG: Vampires have a crippling weakness against gold]]
It is generally agreed that vampires are killed/weakened/burned/sparkled when the sun shines upon them. Every classical celestial body has an associated metal: Mercury for Mercury, copper for Venus, iron for Mars, tin for Jupiter, lead for Saturn, silver for the moon and gold for the sun. Werewolves are associated with the moon and are weak against silver, since vampires are weak against sunlight, they should be weak against gold as well.
It is generally agreed that vampires are killed/weakened/burned/sparkled when the sun shines upon them. Every classical celestial body has an associated metal: Mercury for Mercury, copper for Venus, iron for Mars, tin for Jupiter, lead for Saturn, silver for the moon and gold for the sun. Werewolves are associated with the moon and are weak against silver, since vampires are weak against sunlight, they should be weak against gold as well.
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** Because he is so strong that he can simply overcome the weaknesses; it's why they had to do so much to put him down.
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* Crucifixes only kill vampires because they're holy symbols. And I don't think a piece of wood in the shape of a cross would work without a corpus.
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* If earlier generations are more affected by vampiric weaknesses, how come Dracula isn't killed by sunlight, but vampires in other works sometimes are?
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[[WMG: ''{{Twilight}}'' was written to kill vampires.]]
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[[WMG: ''{{Twilight}}'' ''Literature/{{Twilight}}'' was written to kill vampires.]]
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[[WMG: {{Twilight}} was written BY vampires so we'll stop taking them seriously so they can take over.]]
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[[WMG: {{Twilight}} Literature/{{Twilight}} was written BY vampires so we'll stop taking them seriously so they can take over.]]
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[[WMG: Vampires have been spending centuries building up this elaborate folklore around themselves to hide that they are as lame as the ones in {{Twilight}}.]]
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[[WMG: Vampires have been spending centuries building up this elaborate folklore around themselves to hide that they are as lame as the ones in {{Twilight}}.Literature/{{Twilight}}.]]
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[[WMG: Vampires start badass the closer they are to Dracula, and get weaker the more diluted their vampiric blood is.]]
The first vampire is Dracula (let's call him Generation Zero). He is the most powerful. His brides (Generation One) have only half of his blood, and so are not as powerful (in Hellsing at least, they served as a QuirkyMinibossSquad). The ones they turned (Generation Two) have even less vampire blood. The earlier your generation, the more powerful you are, but the more you are affected by the traditional vampiric weaknesses. All vampires, [[OurVampiresAreDifferent no matter how different,]] are somewhere in this tree. Twilight is near the bottom, hitting a sweet spot: any less diluted and they do not have the extra strength and vitality (effectively a regular human), any more and the weaknesses start getting inconvenient.
This is just my theory. Discuss?
The first vampire is Dracula (let's call him Generation Zero). He is the most powerful. His brides (Generation One) have only half of his blood, and so are not as powerful (in Hellsing at least, they served as a QuirkyMinibossSquad). The ones they turned (Generation Two) have even less vampire blood. The earlier your generation, the more powerful you are, but the more you are affected by the traditional vampiric weaknesses. All vampires, [[OurVampiresAreDifferent no matter how different,]] are somewhere in this tree. Twilight is near the bottom, hitting a sweet spot: any less diluted and they do not have the extra strength and vitality (effectively a regular human), any more and the weaknesses start getting inconvenient.
This is just my theory. Discuss?
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[[WMG: Vampire do exist, but vampire stories are supposed to make us believe they are fictional.]]
This way, anybody who claims to have seen "real" vampires can be written off as a kook, and anything that could be proof of their existence can be dismissed as a hoax. A real vampire who admits to being a vampire is just some weirdo with "prosthetic" fangs.
This way, anybody who claims to have seen "real" vampires can be written off as a kook, and anything that could be proof of their existence can be dismissed as a hoax. A real vampire who admits to being a vampire is just some weirdo with "prosthetic" fangs.
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** They can also transform into wolves and mist/fog.
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*** This plan backfired magnificently because Stephenie Meyer (vampire hunter) is having increasing difficulty differentiating between the vampire assassins and rabid anti-twilighters attacking her.
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* they all have pale skin,constant weakness and ofcorse the craveings for red meat.acording to statistics more women are "vampires".
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* they They all have pale skin,constant skin, constant weakness and ofcorse of course the craveings cravings for red meat.acording meat. According to statistics more women are "vampires".
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A Masquerade on the scale implied by things like White Wolf RPGs is impossible due to sheer scale and internal divisions. And any reproductive methods traditionally attributed to vampires would result in everybody being vampires inside of a century. Thus, our nonvampiric existence refutes the existence of vampires.
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A Masquerade on the scale implied by things like White Wolf RPGs [=RPGs=] is impossible due to sheer scale and internal divisions. And any reproductive methods traditionally attributed to vampires would result in everybody being vampires inside of a century. Thus, our nonvampiric existence refutes the existence of vampires.
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* Shapeshifting Vampire - Can transform into bats. Why else do vampire bats drink blood?
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* Shapeshifting Vampire - Can transform into bats. Why else do you think vampire bats drink blood?
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* Shapeshifting Vampire - Can transform into bats. Why else are vampire bats the only warmblooded creatures to drink blood?
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* Shapeshifting Vampire - Can transform into bats. Why else are do vampire bats the only warmblooded creatures to drink blood?
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* JapaneseVampire - Similar to "Upgrade Vampire", spend some time in Japan and you start losing most of the traditional racial weaknesses.
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* JapaneseVampire Japanese Vampire - Similar to "Upgrade Vampire", spend some time in Japan and you start losing most of the traditional racial weaknesses.
* Shapeshifting Vampire - Can transform into bats. Why else are vampire bats the only warmblooded creatures to drink blood?
* Shapeshifting Vampire - Can transform into bats. Why else are vampire bats the only warmblooded creatures to drink blood?
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[[WMG: Vampires actually DO exist. And they inspire all authors to write books, shoot movies, and create games - to make world ready for em.]]
Which means that there is no Masquerade?
Which means that there is no Masquerade?
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[[WMG: The Entire [[BuffyTheVampireSlayer Buffyverse]] is real.]]
After Harmony got a reality show (see: Season 8) Willow did a HUGE CosmicRetcon to fix alot of their problems and couldn't help but invent something that showed off their various exploits. However, due to this arguments often turn into angering or embarrassing the other person/people in the argument with porn fic quotes, most likely causing a few injured Slayers-In-Training (think for a moment, how do YOU think Spike would react to quotes from a Spike/Xander fic?).
After Harmony got a reality show (see: Season 8) Willow did a HUGE CosmicRetcon to fix alot of their problems and couldn't help but invent something that showed off their various exploits. However, due to this arguments often turn into angering or embarrassing the other person/people in the argument with porn fic quotes, most likely causing a few injured Slayers-In-Training (think for a moment, how do YOU think Spike would react to quotes from a Spike/Xander fic?).
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[[WMG: The Chupacabra myth was created by vampires.]]
They needed something else that villagers could blame when their livestock turned up drained of blood. This is why nobody can agree on what the chupacabra looks like.
They needed something else that villagers could blame when their livestock turned up drained of blood. This is why nobody can agree on what the chupacabra looks like.
