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* Alternate theory: The person(s) who keeps messing with Dan's car is a random person Dan's been a jerk too. Be it someone he pushed out of the way while walking down the street or someone he cut pass because said person was driving too slow.
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** The fact that he tries to go on an actual date with an actual woman in "The Barber" seems to confirm this.

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** The fact that he tries to go on an actual date with an actual woman in "The Barber" seems to confirm this.
this, as well as his short-lived relationship with Hortense in "Burgerphile".
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If Ted ever actually shows up, he'll be a jarring KnightOfCerebus in a similar vein to The Lich on ''AdventureTime''.

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If Ted ever actually shows up, he'll be a jarring KnightOfCerebus in a similar vein to The Lich on ''AdventureTime''.
''WesternAnimation/AdventureTime''.
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* That's probably why Chris wore a pink speedo in the beach episode.



If Ted ever actually shows up, he'll be a jarring KnightOfCerebus in a similar vein to The Lich on AdventureTime

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If Ted ever actually shows up, he'll be a jarring KnightOfCerebus in a similar vein to The Lich on AdventureTime
''AdventureTime''.

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All of the Membranes have intelligence not unlike Eloise (even Gaz is amazingly adept at technological things) and Gaz and Eloise have the same hair color. In addition to that, Gaz also has some of Dan's traits, as noted in the previous guess.

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All of the Membranes have intelligence not unlike Eloise Elise (even Gaz is amazingly adept at technological things) and Gaz and Eloise Elise have the same hair color. In addition to that, Gaz also has some of Dan's traits, as noted in the previous guess.



* Or, the darker version of this theory is that Dan and Eloise had a short-lived affair (note how chummy they became in the Washington episode) and the Membranes were descended from the resulting child.

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* Or, the darker version of this theory is that Dan and Eloise Elise had a short-lived affair (note how chummy they became in the Washington episode) and the Membranes were descended from the resulting child.



[[WMG: At some point, Eloise will invent a machine that will enable Mr. Mumbles to talk...and he'll be voiced by Bill Kopp.]]

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[[WMG: At some point, Eloise Elise will invent a machine that will enable Mr. Mumbles to talk...and he'll be voiced by Bill Kopp.]]
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Ted committed a crime. Dan knows it and testified against him, but Ted got off due to lack of evidence. The crime was was so evil and so horrible that the fact that he got away with it made Dan bitter and disillusioned with the legal system (and eventually ''all'' aspects of society), thus making him into the man he is today. This is also why Ted is on his list. Nobody other than Dan even believes that Ted is guilty, thus making their comments about him low key.

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Ted committed a crime. Dan knows it and testified against him, but Ted got off due to lack of evidence. The crime was was so evil and so horrible that the fact that he got away with it made Dan bitter and disillusioned with the legal system (and eventually ''all'' aspects of society), thus making him into the man he is today. This is also why Ted is on his list. Nobody other than Dan even believes that Ted is guilty, thus making their comments about him emotionally low key.
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Ted committed a crime. Dan knows it and testified against him, but Ted got off due to lack of evidence. The crime was was so evil and so horrible that the fact that he got away with it made Dan bitter and disillusioned with the legal system (and eventually ''all'' aspects of society), thus making him into the man he is today. This is also why Ted is on his list.

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Ted committed a crime. Dan knows it and testified against him, but Ted got off due to lack of evidence. The crime was was so evil and so horrible that the fact that he got away with it made Dan bitter and disillusioned with the legal system (and eventually ''all'' aspects of society), thus making him into the man he is today. This is also why Ted is on his list.
list. Nobody other than Dan even believes that Ted is guilty, thus making their comments about him low key.
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[[WMG: Ted is Dan's FreudianExcuse.]]
Ted committed a crime. Dan knows it and testified against him, but Ted got off due to lack of evidence. The crime was was so evil and so horrible that the fact that he got away with it made Dan bitter and disillusioned with the legal system (and eventually ''all'' aspects of society), thus making him into the man he is today. This is also why Ted is on his list.

If Ted ever actually shows up, he'll be a jarring KnightOfCerebus in a similar vein to The Lich on AdventureTime
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**Chris has mentioned that Dan has other friends they just can't put up with him like Chris can.
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[[WMG: Dan's last name is [[{{Iji}} Kataiser.]]]]
They look similar, and Dan would have reason to be paranoid at everything after nearly dying at least twice. They just managed to rebuild civilisation really quickly by the time he got older.
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* Alternatively (and the more likely version of this guess), Eloise never cheats on Chris. She sees that Dan's intellect could be put to potential use in the future, so she takes a sample of his [=DNA=] to clone him. However, she also combines it with her own chromesomes, hoping that the resulting test-tube baby will inherit her more down-to-earth nature.

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* ** Alternatively (and the more likely in-character than the version of this guess), above), Eloise never cheats on Chris. She sees that Dan's intellect could be put to potential use in the future, so she takes a sample of his [=DNA=] to clone him. However, she also combines it with her own chromesomes, hoping that the resulting test-tube baby will inherit her more down-to-earth nature.

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* Alternatively (and the more likely version of this guess), Eloise never cheats on Chris. She sees that Dan's intellect could be put to potential use in the future, so she takes a sample of his [=DNA=] to clone him. However, she also combines it with her own chromesomes, hoping that the resulting test-tube baby will inherit her more down-to-earth nature.


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[[WMG: At some point, Eloise will invent a machine that will enable Mr. Mumbles to talk...and he'll be voiced by Bill Kopp.]]
Hey, the guy's already involved with the show, and it's not like he's never played a [[EekTheCat cartoon cat before]].
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**The fact that he tries to go on an actual date with an actual woman in "The Barber" seems to confirm this.



In "George Washington," Elise remarks that hanging out with Dan is like hanging out with a big kid. Also, Dan doesn't seem to have a job, or any friends outside of Dan. This seems to hint at a disorder, some form of autism, maybe.

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In "George Washington," Elise remarks that hanging out with Dan is like hanging out with a big kid. Also, Dan doesn't seem to have a job, or any friends outside of Dan.Chris. This seems to hint at a disorder, some form of autism, maybe.
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[[WMG: Dan has some sort of mental disorder. ]]
In "George Washington," Elise remarks that hanging out with Dan is like hanging out with a big kid. Also, Dan doesn't seem to have a job, or any friends outside of Dan. This seems to hint at a disorder, some form of autism, maybe.
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[[WMG: One of Dan's descendants (or relatives' descendants) goes on to found the Angry Marines.]]
Dan's '''always angry.''' '' '''ALL THE TIME.''' '' One would assume it runs in the family.
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[[WMG: Alternatively, Dan's descendants will marry Chris's descendants and ''they'll'' be the ancestors of the Membranes]].

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[[WMG: Alternatively, Dan's descendants will marry Chris's descendants and ''they'll'' be the ancestors of the Membranes]].Membranes.]]
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All of the Membranes have intelligence not unlike Eloise (even Gaz is amazingly adept at technological things) and Gaz and Eloise have the same hair color. In addition to that, Gaz also has some of Dan's traits, as noted in the above guess.

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All of the Membranes have intelligence not unlike Eloise (even Gaz is amazingly adept at technological things) and Gaz and Eloise have the same hair color. In addition to that, Gaz also has some of Dan's traits, as noted in the above previous guess.
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Dib and Professor Membrane inherited his hair color, while Gaz inherited his attitude, temper, and...[[NoIndoorVoice volue level]].

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Dib and Professor Membrane inherited his hair color, while Gaz inherited his attitude, temper, and...[[NoIndoorVoice volue volume level]].
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[[WMG: Alternatively, Dan's descendants will marry Chris's descendants and ''they'll'' be the ancestors of the Membranes]].
All of the Membranes have intelligence not unlike Eloise (even Gaz is amazingly adept at technological things) and Gaz and Eloise have the same hair color. In addition to that, Gaz also has some of Dan's traits, as noted in the above guess.
Granted, given how unlikely it is that he would get close to anyone other than Chris, it might actually be the descendants of Dan's ''relatives'' rather than of Dan himself.
* Or, the darker version of this theory is that Dan and Eloise had a short-lived affair (note how chummy they became in the Washington episode) and the Membranes were descended from the resulting child.
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Dib and Professor Membrane inherited his hair, while Gaz inherited his attitude, temper, and...[[NoIndoorVoice volue level]].

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Dib and Professor Membrane inherited his hair, hair color, while Gaz inherited his attitude, temper, and...[[NoIndoorVoice volue level]].
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[[WMG: Dan is somewhere on the [[InvaderZim Membrane]] family tree.]]
Dib and Professor Membrane inherited his hair, while Gaz inherited his attitude, temper, and...[[NoIndoorVoice volue level]].
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[[WMG: Dan isn't gay, but he thinks that Chris secretly is.]]

His having Chris say he loves him wasn't wishful thinking. He honestly thought that's the kind of thing Chris would have said and wanted his impression to be as accurate as possible. That's why Dan's own response was awkward and uncomfortable.

[[WMG: Ted will be the BigBad of either the series finale or the season 1 finale.]]
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[[WMG: Dan isn't gay, or is at least bisexual]]

Why? Because it'd be a funny subversion where the seemingly gay friend isn't completely in the closet and just hasn't had much luck with women at the moment.
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[[WMG: Dan is [[Characters/HomestuckTrollsOne Karkat]].]]

He's short, angry all the time, and always yelling.
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[[WMG: Dan has an English degree]]
He knows his Shakespeare very well. He has a habit of correcting people's grammar. [[ADegreeInUseless Plus he doesn't seem]] [[AvenueQ to have a job.]]
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[[WMG: Dan lives a sad and pathetic life.]]

He lives in a miserable hotel. He's in love with his best friend, who is married to a bitch.
It sucks to be Dan, and so he takes his anger out on everything else.

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After learning of Dan's quests for revenge, she decided to use this as an excuse to take her revenge on New Mexico.

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After learning of Dan's quests for revenge, she decided to use this as an excuse framed New Mexico for messing with Dan's car, knowing he would want to take a trip down there. That way she could just "tag along," and get her revenge on New Mexico.
without seeming as crazy as Dan.

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