History Recap / TalesFromTheCryptS4E14CuriosityKilled

[[caption-width-right:350:And no, we ain't talkin' about cats.]]

->'''Crypt Keeper:''' '''GERONIMO!!''' ''(he's seen jumping from offscreen and landing in some bushes, which he pops out of)'' So glad you could ''drop'' in, ''kill''-seekers! Don't worry about me, it only ''hearse'' when I laugh! ''(cackles, then groans in pain)'' Boy, that was good! It's even better than ''hang''-gliding! ''(cackles)'' Of course, some folks would rather keep their feet on ''terror'' firma, like the people in tonight's putrid piece. They're spending a nice, quiet weekend in the woods, going ''hack'' to nature! ''(cackles)'' I call this fetid fable: '''Curiosity Killed.'''

Jack and Cynthia's marriage is, to put it bluntly, '''terrible.''' For 45 years, they've been bickering and arguing with one another non-stop, with Cynthia hurling abuse at her husband for every single thing he does. They're currently camping out in the middle of the woods with Jack's friend Harry and his wife Lucille, who are much more easy-going and tolerant of one another. Harry invited Jack to these woods because they contain a special flower that grows in the full moon, and only when planted in or around human remains. These flowers turn out to be the key ingredient of a potion that Lucille (who dabbles in voodoo) is cooking that will let the three of them become young again, Harry wanting to share the potion with Jack as repayment for when Jack saved his life when they served in Guadalcanal. Jack tries to keep Cynthia from knowing about the potion because he doesn't want to relive his youth with her, but when she hears the news, Cynthia develops other plans for obtaining the potion, not wanting to split it with anyone but herself.

!Tropes
* AnswerCut: When two campers discover Jack's dog, having drunken some of the youth potion and regressed to a puppy, chewing on a bone, they ask where he got it from. The camera pans over to Cynthia's remains, her mangled and mutilated corpse appearing old once again.
* AwfulWeddedLife: Cynthia and Jack. They're always arguing and slinging insults at one another. Harry even tells Lucille that they've been at this for 45 continuous years.
* CampingEpisode: The two couples spend the episode camping in the woods, where the special flowers Lucille wants grow.
* ChekhovsGun: The vodka that Jack had stashed under his [=RV's=] passenger seat. Harry warns him that one drop of the stuff could ruin the whole potion on contact, and that's just what Cynthia uses it for in the ending.
* CordonBleughChef: Cynthia has this opinion about the healthy vegan food that Jack tries to make for their outdoor dinner, rebuking it as "leftovers from a compost heap", and wanting to be served "real food in a real restaurant".

* EvilDetectingDog: Jack's dog. It barks and growls aggressively at Cynthia, hinting that the former abuses it.
* EvilIsHammy: Cynthia, who never once shuts up about how much she hates everything.
* {{Foreshadowing}}: Jack complains that Cynthia will kill him if she doesn't stop yelling. Guess what she does by the episode's end.
* FoulFlower: The flowers that are needed for Lucille's potion are a partial example. They rapidly grow by the light of the full moon, and can only gain nutrients from the remains of a dead human being. If utilized in just the right way, they can be used to grant extended youth, but if used in the wrong way, they'll cause who ever ingests them to age to dust.
* FountainOfYouth: The portion that Harry and Lucille whip up and want to share with Jack will help the threesome become young again. Cynthia sabotages it when by destroying the flowers needed for it and replacing them with vodka, and the tainted potion ends up causing them to age to the point where they turn to dust. She takes some of the untainted potion for herself and becomes young again, but her victory is short-lived, as she's mauled to death by Jack's dog, which also managed to drink some of the potion and became young as well.
* GoldDigger: Cynthia reveals herself to be one in the end, wanting to use her younger body to marry a man with money.
* GroinAttack: Cynthia imagines cutting of Jack's dick as part of how she would kill him, but then reconsiders since he hasn't used it in 20 years.
* HairTriggerTemper: Anything and ''everything'' can and will set Cynthia off on one of her "bitch fits". Case in point, she hurls abuse at Jack simply for belching.
* HateSink: Cynthia, who Lucille outright calls a "crocodile". Not only does she scream nearly all of her dialogue, she hurls abuse (and anything she can grab) at Jack for every little thing he does, as well as doing the same to Harry and Lucille, who don't even offend her personally. She also tampers with Lucille's potion so it kills everyone else before ingesting some of the untainted potion for herself. Thankfully, Jack's dog (which is implied to be abused by the hateful woman) breaks free of its leash and tears her to pieces.
** On the other hand, Cynthia laments to Lucille that she married Jack when she was young, beautiful, and foolish. 45 years later, she sadly contemplates that she has nothing to show for it. It's the only moment in the episode that paints her in a genuinely sympathetic light.
* HollywoodVoodoo: Lucille is a practitioner of voodoo, and she aspires to use special flowers that grow in the woods she and the others are camping in to make a potion that will make them young again.
* HumanResources: The bulbs that grow into Lucille's flowers were brought to America by Lucille's father, and Harry stuffed them into the mouth of Emma's corpse after he killed her, prompting him and Jack to dig up her skeleton to let them grow and harvest the flowers.
* IOweYouMyLife: Harry and Jack served in the military together, Jack even saving Harry's life in Guadalcanal. Along with his genuine friendship with Jack, this is the main reason he wants to share the potion with him.
* InNameOnly: The comic the episode takes its name from is about a shrewish wife who suspects their neighbor killed his own wife, who was her best friend and treated her own husband the same way, only to find out in the end that her husband was in on it and has to fast forward their plans.
* ItsAllAboutMe: Cynthia only cares about herself, and has no problem swiping the untainted potion samples and watching Jack die of old age, now that she can possibly find herself a younger, better man.
* LaserGuidedKarma: Even though Cynthia paid the price for her wickedness, and Jack was mostly innocent, Harry and Lucille were subject to revenge for working together to kill the former's first wife, Emma, with a 6-inch blade and using her corpse as fertilizer to properly grow the bulbs Lucille inherited to grow the flower for the youth potion.
* TheLoinsSleepTonight: Cynthia comments that Jack hasn't "used" his dick in 20 years.
* MadnessMantra: Jack's "Ghoulie, Ghoulie" song that he sings to Cynthia as they prepare the potion.
* MotorMouth: Cynthia hurls abuse at speeds that can rival some of the fastest cars ever made.
* NatureLover: Lucille, who grew up on an island surrounded by nature. She even says that her family used to sit on tree stumps, smell the fragrance of jasmine in the air, and listen to the sounds of silence.
* NoIndoorVoice: Cynthia screams every single piece of her dialogue, just to accentuate how evil she is.
* OhCrap: Jack, when Harry "introduces" him to Emma's decayed corpse. He still agrees to go through with their plans, despite his apprehension.
* OpenSecret: It's made clear that Harry had a wife before Lucille, Emma, who he stabbed to death so the flowers needed for Lucille's potion began to grow in and around her corpse, and he tells Jack about them as well. If Lucille's tone when Cynthia reveals the fact to her is any indication, she was in on it.
* OutOfContextEavesdropping: Cynthia jumps to conclusions and thinks that Jack is going to kill her when she hears what sounds like a murder plot inside their RV, then sees them digging up Emma's grave.
* RapidAging: Jack, Lucille, and Harry end up aging to dust after Cynthia spikes the potion with vodka, but not before she saved some of the pure strain for herself. After Jack's dog kills her, her remains revert back to their old age.

* RobbingTheDead: Jack and Harry dig up the corpse of the latter's first wife Emma to collect the bulbs of the special flowers growing in her mouth.
* RunningGag: Cynthia constantly swats mosquitos looking to bite her throughout the episode.
* ScreamDiscretionShot: Jack's dog growls and breaks loose from his chain after drinking some of the spilled portion, then pounces on Cynthia, mauling her as she screams in the background.

* UngratefulBastard: After clarifying that he and Harry weren't going to kill her and Lucille letting her know that she's cooking a potion that will help all of them be young again, Jack offers to let Cynthia share the potion so they can be young together, then destroys her flowers in front of her after refusing to put up with her horrid attitude for another 45 years.
** Cynthia gets back at him when she spikes the potion, after taking some of the pure stuff for herself, watching as Jack, Harry, and Lucille shrivel to dust with selfish glee, boasting that she'll get a new man with her new self.

->'''Crypt Keeper:''' ''(wearing a Boy Scout uniform, and planting the bulb of one of Lucille's flowers in the mouth of a skull, housed in a flowerpot sitting in front of him. a second pot, with one of the flowers already fully grown, sits next to the first pot)'' That Cynthia's a real ''shrieking'' violet, wouldn't you say, kiddies? A regular ''afterlife'' of the party! Didn't know I was a ''bore'' scout, did you? Well, I am! My ''horror''-ticulture ''scare''-it badge requires me to plant ''croak''-uses. Hmmm... A shame, really. I'd much rather plant... ''die''-brids! ''(cackles)''

* OpenSecret: It's made clear that Harry had a wife before Lucille, Emma, who he stabbed to death so the flowers needed for Lucille's potion began to grow in and around her corpse, and he tells Jack about them as well. If Lucille's tone when Cynthia reveals the fact to her is any indication, she was in on it, too.

* ReducedToDust: What happens to Jack, Harry, and Lucille when they ingest the tainted potion.|

* LaserGuidedKarma: Even though Cynthia paid the price for her wickedness, and Jack was mostly innocent, Harry and Lucille were subject to revenge for working together to kill the former's first wife with the potion they had hoped to drink from the ingredients she "provided".

* LaserGuidedKarma: Even though Cynthia paid the price for her wickedness, and Jack was mostly innocent, Harry and Lucille were subject to revenge for killing working together to kill the former's first wife with the potion they had hoped to drink from the ingredients she "provided".

[[caption-width-right:350:And we ain't talkin' about cats.]]

Jack and Cynthia have a terrible marriage. For 45 years, they've been bickering and arguing with one another non-stop. They're currently camping out in the woods with Jack's friend Harry and his wife Lucille, who are much more tolerant of one another. They've brought Jack to the woods because they contain a special plant that turns out to be the key ingredient of a potion that will let them become young again. Jack doesn't want to include Cynthia in the affair because he doesn't want to relive his youth with her. Upon hearing the news, Cynthia develops other plans for obtaining the potion.

* AnswerCut: When two campers discover Jack's dog, having drunken some of the youth potion and regressed to a puppy, chewing on a bone, they ask where he got it from. The camera pans over Cynthia's remains, her mangled corpse appearing old once again.
* AwfulWeddedLife: Cynthia and Jack. They're always arguing and saying hurtful things to one another. Harry comments to Lucille that they've been at this for 45 years.
* EverybodyDiesEnding: All the main characters are dead by the end of the episode.
* EvilDetectingDog: Jack's dog. It barks and growls aggressively at Cynthia, but never Jack, hinting that the former abuses it.
* FountainOfYouth: The portion that Harry and Lucille want to share with Jack so the three can become young. Cynthia sabotages it when Harry destroys the flower for her, and the tainted potion ends up causing them to age to the point where they turn to dust. She takes some of the untainted potion for herself and becomes young again, but her victory is short lived, as she shortly mauled to death by Jack's dog, which also managed to drink some of the potion and became young as well.
* HateSink: Cynthia. Not only does she scream nearly all of her dialogue, she hurls abuse at Jack for every little thing he does, as well as doing the same to Harry and Lucille. She even tampers with Lucille's potion so it kills everyone else before ingesting some of the untainted potion for herself. Thankfully, Jack's dog (which is implied to be abused by the hateful woman) breaks free of its leash and tears her to pieces.
* IOweYouMyLife: Harry and Jack served in the military, with Jack saving Harry's life in Guadalcanal. This, along with his genuine friendship with Jack, is the main reason he wants to share the potion with him.

* RapidAging: Jack, Lucille and Harry end up aging to dust after Cynthia adds vodka in their potions, but not before she saved some of the pure strain for herself. After Jack's dog kills her, her remains revert back to her old age.
* ScreamDiscretionShot: Jack's dog growls and breaks loose from his chain after drinking some of the spilled portion and pounces on Cynthia, mauling her as she screams in the background.

* KillEmAll: All the main characters are dead by the end of the episode.

* KillEmAll: All the main characters are dead by the end of the episode

* DroppedABridgeOnHim: Cynthia comments on how Jack hasn't used his dick in 20 years. He looks at her in disappointment and walks to the RV.

Two bickering couples Cynthia & Jack have a terrible marriage for 45 years. They're camping out with Harry & Lucille who discovered a youth portion. Jack doesn't want to include Cynthia at all cause he doesn't want to spend his youth with her at all. Cynthia has other plans for the three that ends fatal.

* {{Answer Cut}}: When two campers discover Jack dog as puppy chewing on a bone and asked where he get it from & how he has cute teeth. The camera pans over Cynthia bones & body parts to her mangled corpse


* {{Awful Wedded Life}}: Cynthia & Jack. They always arguing and saying hurtful things to one another. Harry comments that they been doing this for 45 years to Lucille.

* {{Dropped A Bridge On Him}}: Cynthia comments on how Harry hasn't used his dick in 20 years. He looks at Emma in disappointment and walks to the RV

* {{Evil detecting dog}}: Jack's dog. For some reason it barks & growls aggressively at Cynthia but never Jack.

* {{Fountain of Youth}}: The portion that Harry & Lucille wants to share with Jack so the can become young. Cynthia sabotage it when Harry destroy the flower for her, and poison the other three. She takes it for herself and becomes young but is short lived as she is killed by the dog that drunk some that was spilled on the ground.

* {{Kill Em All}}: All the main characters are dead at the end of the episode


* {{Scream Discretion Shot}}: Jack's dog growls and breaks loose from his chain after drinking some of spilled portion and pounces on Cynthia as she screams & gurgle in the background

* {{Kill 'Em All}}: All the main characters are dead at the end of the episode

* {{Everyone dies}}: All the main characters are dead at the end of the episode

* {{Fountain of Youth}}: The portion that Harry & Lucille wants to share with Jack so the can become young. Cynthia sabotage it when Harry destroy the flower for her, and poison the other three. She takes it for herself and becomes young but doesn't get to enjoy it as she is killed by the dog that drunk some that was spilled on the ground.

* {{Scream Discretion Shot}}: Jack's dog growls and breaks loose from his chain after drinking some of spilled portion and pounces on Cynthia as she screams in the background

* {{Scream Discretion Shot}}: Jack's dog growls and breaks loose from his chain and pounces on Cynthia as she screams in the background

* {{Answer Cut}}: When two campers discover Jack dog as puppy chewing on a bone and asked where he get it from. The camera pans over Cynthia bones & body parts to her mangled corpse

* {{Fountain of Youth}}: The portion that Harry & Lucille wants to share with Jack so the can become young. Cynthia sabotage it when Harry destroy the flower for her, and poison the other three. She takes it for herself and becomes young but doesn't get to enjoy it as she is killed by the dog that drunk some that was spilled on the ground.

* {{Answer Cut}}: When two campers discover Harry dog as puppy chewing on a bone and asked where he get it from. The camera pans over Cynthia bones & body parts to her mangled corpse

* {{Answer Cut}}: When two campers discover Harry dog as puppy chewing on a bone and asked where he get it from. The camera pans over Cynthia bones & body parts to her dead body

* {{Fountain of Youth}}: The portion that Harry & Lucille wants to share with Jack so the can become young. Cynthia sabotage it when Harry destroy the flower for her, and poison the other three. She takes it for herself and becomes young but doesn't get to enjoy it as she is killed by the dog drunk some himself.

* {{Fountain of Youth}}: The portion that Harry & Lucille wants to share with Jack so the can become young. Cynthia sabotage it when Harry destroy the flower for her, and poison the other three.

* {{Answer Cut}}: When two campers discover Harry dog as puppy chewing on a bone and asked where he get it from. The camera pans over Cynthia bones & body parts to her dead body

* {{Everyone dies}}: All the main characters are dead at the end of the episode

* {{Fountain of Youth}}: The portion that Harry & Lucille wants to share with Jack so the can become young. Cynthia sabotage it when Harry destroy the flower for her, and poison the other three.

{{Everyone dies}}: All the main characters are dead at the end of the episode