History Recap / GameOfThronesS2E1TheNorthRememebers

** Arguably Littlefinger proves his point perfectly; no matter how much Cersei threatens him, he is far too essential to kill off thanks to his network of contacts.

* MoralEventHorizon: Janos Slynt's betrayal of Ned was a bit lost to the audience next to Littlefinger's betrayal. Not so much his leading a massacre of Robert's bastards, including personally killing a baby.

* RefugeInAudacity: Tyrion, from the moment he arrives in King's Landing. Littlefinger tries it, but is quickly put in his place by Cersei.

** Mellisandre, after deliberately drinking a poisoned cup: "The night is dark and full of terrors, old man. But the fire burns them all away."

We follow the red comet to the Land Beyond the Wall, where Jon, Morment, Sam and their party have been travelling for some time, and are now arriving at Craster's Keep. The good news is: there are girls! The bad news is: the lads can't touch them. The ugly news is: they're Craster's daughters...and his wives, too. ''Eeeesh.'' 'Your house, your rules' never sounded so nasty before. Jon is understandably as creeped out as we are, but Morment, also understandably, tells him to keep his mouth shut. Also; where are all of Craster's sons?

We follow the red comet to the Land Beyond the Wall, where Jon, Morment, Sam and their party have been travelling for some time, and are now arriving at Craster's Keep. The good news is: there are girls! The bad news is: the lads can't touch them. The ugly news is: they're Craster's daughters...and his wives, too. ''Eeeesh.'' 'Your house, your rules' never sounded so nasty before. Also; where are all of Craster's sons?

* BadassBoast: A brief one by Cersei: after Littlefinger mocks the reveal of her {{Twincest}} and tells her "Knowledge is power," she demonstrates how the Lannister will instantly follow her every command, including killing him, and replies "Power is power."

* BadassBoast: A brief one by Cersei: after Littlefinger mocks the reveal of her {{Twincest}} and tells her "Knowledge is power," she demonstrates how the Goldcloaks will instantly follow her every command, including killing him, and replies "Power is power."
--> Correction, those were Lannister soldiers, not Goldcloaks.

And she's powerless to stop what happens next, which happens to be a lot of Gold Cloaks bursting into Littlefinger's brothel, where Ros has apparently been promoted - by what means we shall not guess - and is coaching the girls with a rather familiar speech. Janos Slynt arrives, seizes Robert's infant daughter Barra and, as her mother screams, slits her throat.

And she's powerless to stop what happens next, which happens to be a lot of Gold Cloaks bursting into Littlefinger's brothel, where Ros has apparently been promoted - by what means we shall not guess - and is coaching the girls with a rather familiar speech. Janos Slynt arrives, seizes Robert's infant daughter Barra and, without any ceremony, slits her throat.

* BadassBoast: A brief one by Cersei: after Littlefinger mocks the reveal of her {{Twincest}} and tells her "knowledge is power," she demonstrates how the Goldcloaks will instantly follow her every command, including killing him, and replies "Power is power."

** Cersei is now really getting a sense of how out of her control Joffrey is.

** Cersei is now really getting a sense of how out of her control Joffrey is.

* [[MyGodWhatHaveIDone My Gods, What Have We Done?]]: One of the Gold Cloaks is horrified over their killings of Robert's bastard children.

...because Gendry and Arya are long gone, riding through the Dark Hedges and on their way to the North.

The episode begins with the Hound in a fight - that ends very quickly, as he knocks his opponent over the edge of the battlement they're fighting on. The opponent splash lands, and everyone claps.

It's Joffrey's name day tournament. Remember what Joffrey was like last season? Well, now he's having a man drowned in wine for showing up late and slightly drunk. Sansa, thinking quickly, gets the tipsy Ser Dontos off the hook, but it's clear everyone is taking care not to offend Joffrey. Except for Tyrion, who shows up out of the blue and also shows up Joffrey completely.

Tyrion then proceeds to the meeting of the Small Council to show up Joffrey's mum as well. Tyrion is definitely not the brother Cersei would prefer to see right now, but she's stuck with him - Tyrion's the one in their father's good books, for once, which means he's the one standing in for Tywin as Hand of the King. He suggests that Arya Stark would be a good bargaining chip in negotiations with Robb Stark, and is none too pleased when Cersei admits that she not only let Joffrey behead Ned Stark, she's lost the younger daughter as well.

Then to Dragonstone, where Stannis Baratheon is having a nighttime bonfire on the beach. And by bonfire we mean he's burning the statues of the Seven at the urging of Melisandre, who has a thing for red and fire and who is one strange lady. Maester Cressen and Davos aren't too happy about that. Cutting to inside the castle, Stannis dictates a very exact letter addressed to all the lords of the Seven Kingdoms, revealing that the Baratheon family tree wasn't exactly forking. Neither was the Lannister one, for that matter. It turns out that Maester Cressen is so unhappy with Melisandre and the road she's planning to take Stannis down that he tries to poison her. ''Try'' being the word, because not only does he have to drink first to pretend the wine he offers is safe, but as she watches him die she takes a big draught without flinching, as the ruby at her throat flashes.

In Robb's camp, peace terms are under discussion between Robb and alton Lannister. Robb basically wants his sisters, his father's bones and his father's sword back, and for the North to be left alone from now on. Alton is amenable to the first three, not so much with the last one. And Robb reminds us, once again, that just about everyone now knows the Lannisters' dirty little secret, just before he dispatches Theon to the Iron Islands and Catelyn to negotiate with Renly.

And she's powerless to stop what happens next, which happens to be a lot of Gold Cloaks bursting into Littlefinger's brothel, where Ros has apparently been promoted - by what means we shall not guess - and is coaching the girls with a rather familiar speech. Janos Slynt arrives, seizes Robert's infant bastard Barra and, without any ceremony, slits her throat.

As Robb Stark and his northern army continue the war against the Lannisters, Tyrion arrives in King’s Landing to counsel Joffrey and temper the young king’s excesses. On the island of Dragonstone, Stannis Baratheon plots an invasion to claim his late brother’s throne, allying himself with the fiery Melisandre, a strange priestess of a stranger god. Across the sea, Daenerys, her three young dragons and khalasar trek through the Red Waste in search of allies, or water. In the North, Bran presides over a threadbare Winterfell, while beyond the Wall, Jon Snow and the Night’s Watch must shelter with a devious wildling.

It's Joffrey's name day tournament. Remember what Joffrey was like last season? Well, now he's having a man drowned in wine for showing up late and slightly drunk. Sansa, thinking quickly, gets Ser Dontos off the hook, but it's clear everyone takes care not to offend Joffrey. Except for Tyrion, who shows up out of the blue and also shows up Joffrey completely.

...the Red Waste. Dany is currently minus a horse, since her Silver has just dropped dead, and being plus three (incredibly good CGI) dragons isn't as marvellous as you might expect, especially since she can't work out what to feed them. Or any of her khalasar, for that matter, as they're running low on supplies. In an attempt to find food or some town somewhere, Dany sends out her bloodriders on a desperate search.

Then to Dragonstone, where Stannis Baratheon is having a nighttime bonfire on the beach. And by bonfire we mean he's burning the statues of the Seven at the urging of Melisandre, who has a thing for red and fire and who is one strange lady. Maester Cressen and Davos aren't too happy about that. Cutting to inside the castle, Stannis dictates a very exact letter addressed to all the lords of the Seven Kingdoms, revealing that the Baratheon family tree wasn't exactly forking. Neither was the Lannister one, for that matter. It turns out that Maester Cressen is so unhappy with Melisandre and the road she's planning to take Stannis down that he tries to poison her. ''Try'' being the word, because not only does he have to drink first to pretend the wine is safe, but as she watches him die she takes a big draught without flinching, as the ruby at her throat flashes.

Back in King's Landing, Tyrion and Shae have some time together where they discuss just how appalling the city smells, and Littlefinger tries to one up Cersei. It really doesn't work, since she pulls on him what he pulled in Ned last year - the palace guards belong to her, for the moment, and Littlefinger will have to watch himself.

Actually, it turns out that there's ''one'' person who doesn't seem to know the secret yet - that being, ironically enough, Joffrey himself. He's more concerned about the possibility of any of Robert's bastards being used against him. In the midst of redecorating the throne room he questions Cersei about it, and is pretty darn rude. Cersei gets to do what all of us having been longing to and gets the requisite Joffrey slap of the season in. Unfortunately it appears Joffrey isn't half so afraid of her as he is of Tyrion - or maybe it's becasue he's king now - and tells her if she does that again, she'll die for it. Cersei's hold over her son is crumbling, and she knows it.

The same is happening to black haired children all over the city. (How many bastard children did Robert ''have?'') But, though they're torturing Tobho Mott for information, they've managed to let one bastard slip through their grip...

Back in King's Landing, Tyrion and Shae have some time together where they discuss just how appalling the city smells, and Littlefinger tries to one up Cersei. It really doesn't work, since she pulls on him what he pulled in Ned last year - the palace guards belong to her, for the moment, and Littlefinger will have to watch himself.

...the Red Waste. Dany is currently minus a horse, since her Silver has just dropped dead, and being plus three (incredibly good CGI) dragons isn't as marvellous as you might expect, especially since she can't work out what to feed them. Or any of her khalasar, for that matter, as they're running low on supplies. In an attempt to find food or some town somewhere, Dany sends out her bloodriders on a desperate search.