History Quotes / TheAdventureZoneBalance

->''"We see the Bureau of Balance Headquarters, and it's now. We see Magnus laying out his possessions, his mind still addled with memories he cannot quite process or explain. We see Merle, the dwarven cleric, and Taako, the elvish wizard, departing a large, emptied out megastore and walking towards the main dome on the far side of the complex; still unsure in their stride. We see the inside of that dome, at the Director making preparations to destroy the Grand Relic as Davenport delivers it. We see Angus [=McDonald=], the world's greatest detective, watching this process intently, as he watches most things. We see Carrie, inconsolable at the unceremonious death of her best friend. She is in her private quarters with her girlfriend, Killian, and her robotic teammate Noel — neither of whom know exactly what to say. What do you say?"

->''"We see Johan, who has just finished restringing a fiddle, which he plucks happily as he prepares to compose a new meal for the Void Fish, which floats nervously in its tank. Then we're back outside, and we pan up, and up… and up. Past the sky, past space, past the boundaries of the Prime Material Plane that this story takes place in. And we see more planes now; the Astral Plane, the Plane of Thought, the Elemental Planes, all twelve Planes that make up our Planar System moving in perfect orbit, perfect synchronicity, sustaining each other in a meticulous, demanding dance."

->''"[[WhamLine And then we pan up, and we see a Thirteenth Plane descend.]] It is a disc of shimmering, living darkness, crossed with ribbons of blue, red, green, and gold. It is larger than all the other Planes combined, and as it lowers slowly bright white eyes begin to open all along the underside of this Plane — millions of them, burning with malice and hunger, all of them focused inward and down, back down, all the way down to the Bureau of Balance headquarters. And somewhere in that Plane, a smile flashes across someone's face."

->''"We see the Bureau of Balance Headquarters, and it's now. We see Magnus laying out his possessions, his mind still addled with memories he cannot quite process or explain. We see Merle, the dwarven cleric, and Taako, the elvish wizard, departing a large, emptied out megastore and walking towards the main dome on the far side of the complex; still unsure in their stride. We see the inside of that dome, at the Director making preparations to destroy the Grand Relic as Davenport delivers it. We see Angus McDonald, the world's greatest detective, watching this process intently, as he watches most things. We see Carrie, inconsolable at the unceremonious death of her best friend. She is in her private quarters with her girlfriend, Killian, and her robotic teammate Noel — neither of whom know exactly what to say. What do you say?"

->''[[WhamLine"And then we pan up, and we see a Thirteenth Plane descend.]] It is a disc of shimmering, living darkness, crossed with ribbons of blue, red, green, and gold. It is larger than all the other Planes combined, and as it lowers slowly bright white eyes begin to open all along the underside of this Plane — millions of them, burning with malice and hunger, all of them focused inward and down, back down, all the way down to the Bureau of Balance headquarters. And somewhere in that Plane, a smile flashes across someone's face."

-->-- '''Magic Brian''' (as he's falling to his death), ''Ep. 4 Here There Be Gerblins - Chapter Four''

->''"Yeah, you know… the fact of the matter is, your life is a constant stream of changes, I mean, you start one day accepting a job offer, and you end, saving the world. And you’re going to walk through that door, and your life will never be the same, and I wish I could tell you that everyday from now on will be amazing, and the happiest day of your life, but that’s not the way that life works, but every day will be made better because she’s in it with you. You aren’t going to be alone ever again, even if you’re ever separated, you’ll still ne->''"Yeah, you know… the fact of the matter is, your life is a constant stream of changes, I mean, you start one day accepting a job offer, and you end, saving the world. And you’re going to walk through that door, and your life will never be the same, and I wish I could tell you that everyday from now on will be amazing, and the happiest day of your life, but that’s not the way that life works, but every day will be made better because she’s in it with you. You aren’t going to be alone ever again, even if you’re ever separated, you’ll still never be alone."''

->''"Abraca-fuck-you."''

->''"We've chosen the perfect person for this, it's like sending a mildly eloquen piñata in!"''

-->-- '''Taako/Justin''', ''Ep. 4 Here There Be Gerblins - Chapter Four''

-->-- '''Taako/Justin''', ''Ep. 23 Petals to the Metal - Chapter Six''

->''"We've chosen the perfect person for this, it's like sending a mildly eloquen piñata in!"''

->''"Yeah, you know… the fact of the matter is, your life is a constant stream of changes, I mean, you start one day accepting a job offer, and you end, saving the world. And you’re going to walk through that door, and your life will never be the same, and I wish I could tell you that everyday from now on will be amazing, and the happiest day of your life, but that’s not the way that life works, but every day will be made better because she’s in it with you. You aren’t going to be alone ever again, even if you’re ever separated, you’ll still neid_user) == "undefined") ga('send', 'event', 'ads', 'load', 'blocked', {'nonInteraction': 1});
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->''"Bad news, compadres, this place is magic as hell."''
-->-- '''Taako/Justin''', ''Ep. 15 Murder on the Rockport Limited - Chapter Six''

->''"You're going to be amazing."''
-->-- '''Lady Istus''', ''Ep. 47 The Eleventh Hour - Chapter Seven''

->''"I'll be having my body back, you undead fuck."''
-->-- '''Magnus''', ''Ep. 56 The Suffering Game - Chapter Six''

->''"I cast prestidigitation, shoot sparks out of my fingers, cast minor illusion, put myself in a dope outfit, and start walkin' down the catwalk with all the style and panache I can muster, which is - I should note - a fuckin' lot."''
-->-- '''Taako''', ''Ep. 56 The Suffering Game - Chapter Six''

->''"How would you like to live forever?"''
->''"I'd hate it. Shut the fuck up."''
-->-- '''The Animus Bell''' and '''Magnus''', ''Ep. 57 The Suffering Game - Chapter Seven''

->''"John, thanks for the chess game, and... kiss my ass, you sanctimonious bastard."''
-->--'''Merle Highchurch''', ''Ep. 63 The Stolen Century - Chapter Four''

->''"Our capacity for love increases with each person we cross paths with throughout our lives and with each moment we spend with those people. But too often we neglect that part of ourselves in favor of others, and by the time we realize just how important it is, we find ourselves with fewer folks around to practice with. But the seven of you have something that nobody else ever had. Time. All the time in the world. Time enough to grow indescribably close. Time enough to, to learn how to care for each other, how to allow yourselves to be cared for. And in the case of Barry and Lup, time enough to fall deeply and truly in love."''
-->--'''Griffin [=McElroy=]''', ''Ep. 64 The Stolen Century - Chapter Five''

->''“When someone leaves your life, those exits are not made equal. Some are beautiful and poetic and satisfying. Others are abrupt and unfair. But most are just unremarkable, unintentional, and clumsy.”''
-->--'''Griffin [=McElroy=]''', ''Ep. 66 The Stolen Century - Chapter Seven''

->''"Yeah, you know… the fact of the matter is, your life is a constant stream of changes, I mean, you start one day accepting a job offer, and you end, saving the world. And you’re going to walk through that door, and your life will never be the same, and I wish I could tell you that everyday from now on will be amazing, and the happiest day of your life, but that’s not the way that life works, but every day will be made better because she’s in it with you. You aren’t going to be alone ever again, even if you’re ever separated, you’ll still never be alone."''
-->--'''Magnus''', ''to [[spoiler: Carey]] before her marriage to [[spoiler: Killian]].''

->''"Come on, ride the train. It's the choo choo and ride it!"''

->''"If our heroes can't stop this runaway train, then I'm going to have to find a new podcast to introduce. Is Serial hiring?"''

->''“I wanna tell you a story about the time there were three ogres, right? And then one of ‘em hit me so hard I almost died. You were sitting up in some sort of weird laser just shooting flasks willy-nilly, Travis was ripping the arms off a robot, and I got punched so hard I almost died! I’m not gonna go toe-to-toe with a crab while you’re armed with a terrible Scottish accent, and Travis doesn’t even have his shield! I’m out!”''
-->-- '''Taako/Justin''', ''Ep. 13 Murder on the Rockport Limited - Chapter Four''

->''"Bad news, compadres, this place is magic as hell."''
-->-- '''Taako/Justin''', ''Ep. 15 Murder on the Rockport Limited - Chapter Six''

->''"You're going to be amazing."''
-->-- '''Lady Istus''', ''Ep. 47 The Eleventh Hour - Chapter Seven''

->''"I'll be having my body back, you undead fuck."''
-->-- '''Magnus''', ''Ep. 56 The Suffering Game - Chapter Six''

->''"How would you like to live forever?"''
->''"I'd hate it. Shut the fuck up."''
-->-- '''The Animus Bell''', '''Magnus''', ''Ep. 57 The Suffering Game - Chapter Seven''

->''"John, thanks for the chess game, and... kiss my ass, you sanctimonious bastard."''
-->--'''Merle Highchurch''', ''Ep. 63 The Stolen Century - Chapter Four''

->''"Our capacity for love increases with each person we cross paths with throughout our lives and with each moment we spend with those people. But too often we neglect that part of ourselves in favor of others, and by the time we realize just how important it is, we find ourselves with fewer folks around to practice with. But the seven of you have something that nobody else ever had. Time. All the time in the world. Time enough to grow indescribably close. Time enough to, to learn how to care for each other, how to allow yourselves to be cared for. And in the case of Barry and Lup, time enough to fall deeply and truly in love."''
-->--'''Griffin [=McElroy=]''', ''Ep. 64 The Stolen Century - Chapter Five''

->''“When someone leaves your life, those exits are not made equal. Some are beautiful and poetic and satisfying. Others are abrupt and unfair. But most are just unremarkable, unintentional, and clumsy.”''
-->--'''Griffin [=McElroy=]''', ''Ep. 66 The Stolen Century - Chapter Seven''

->''"John, thanks for the chess game, and... kiss my ass, you sanctimonious bastard."''
-->--'''Merle Highchurch''', ''Ep. 63 The Stolen Century - Chapter Four''

->''"Our capacity for love increases with each person we cross paths with throughout our lives and with each moment we spend with those people. But too often we neglect that part of ourselves in favor of others, and by the time we realize just how important it is, we find ourselves with fewer folks around to practice with. But the seven of you have something that nobody else ever had. Time. All the time in the world. Time enough to grow indescribably close. Time enough to, to learn how to care for each other, how to allow yourselves to be cared for. And in the case of Barry and Lup, time enough to fall deeply and truly in love."''
-->--'''Griffin [=McElroy=]''', ''Ep. 64 The Stolen Century - Chapter Five''

->''“When someone leaves your life, those exits are not made equal. Some are beautiful and poetic and satisfying. Others are abrupt and unfair. But most are just unremarkable, unintentional, and clumsy.”''
-->--'''Griffin [=McElroy=]''', ''Ep. 66 The Stolen Century - Chapter Seven''

->''“I wanna tell you a story about the time there were three ogres, right? And then one of ‘em hit me so hard I almost died. You were sitting up in some sort of weird laser just shooting flasks willy-nilly, Travis was ripping the arms off a robot, and I got punched so hard I almost died! I’m not gonna go toe-to-toe with a crab while you’re armed with a terrible Scottish accent, and Travis doesn’t even have his shield! I’m out!”''
-->-- '''Taako/Justin''', ''Ep. 13 Murder on the Rockport Limited - Chapter Four''

->''"You're going to be amazing."''
-->-- '''Lady Istus''', ''Ep. 47 The Eleventh Hour - Chapter Seven''

->''"John, thanks for the chess game, and... kiss my ass, you sanctimonious bastard."''
-->--'''Merle Highchurch''', ''Ep. 63 The Stolen Century - Chapter Four''

->''"Our capacity for love increases with each person we cross paths with throughout our lives and with each moment we spend with those people. But too often we neglect that part of ourselves in favor of others, and by the time we realize just how important it is, we find ourselves with fewer folks around to practice with. But the seven of you have something that nobody else ever had. Time. All the time in the world. Time enough to grow indescribably close. Time enough to, to learn how to care for each other, how to allow yourselves to be cared for. And in the case of Barry and Lup, time enough to fall deeply and truly in love."''
-->--'''Griffin [=McElroy=]''', ''Ep. 64 The Stolen Century - Chapter Five''

->''“When someone leaves your life, those exits are not made equal. Some are beautiful and poetic and satisfying. Others are abrupt and unfair. But most are just unremarkable, unintentional, and clumsy.”''
-->--'''Griffin [=McElroy=]''', ''Ep. 66 The Stolen Century - Chapter Seven''

-->--'''Magnus''', ''to [[spoiler: Killian]] before their marriage to [[spoiler: Carey]].''

-->--'''Magnus''', ''to [[spoilers: Killian]] before their marriage to [[spoiler: Carey]].''

-->--'''Griffin [=McElroy=]''', ''Ep. 66 The Stolen Century - Chapter Seven''

-->--''Griffin [=McElroy=]'', ''Ep. 66 The Stolen Century - Chapter Seven''

-->--'''Griffin [=McElroy=]'', ''Ep. 66 The Stolen Century - Chapter Seven''

-->--'''Griffin {{McElroy}}''', ''Ep. 66 The Stolen Century - Chapter Seven''

-->--'''Griffin ={{McElroy}}=''', ''Ep. 66 The Stolen Century - Chapter Seven''

-->--'''Griffin McElroy''', ''Ep. 66 The Stolen Century - Chapter Seven''