History Quotes / Buttmonkey

-->-- '''Joko''', ''WebVideo/SMPLive''

--> '''Jerry''' from ''WesternAnimation/RickAndMorty'' in the episode, [[Recap/RickAndMortyS2E9LookWhosPurging Look Who's Purging Now]]

-->--'''Carnage''' on '''Spider-Man''', ''ComicBook/SpiderMan: The Trial of Peter Parker''

->'''[[ComicBook/AntMan Hank Pym]]''': ''You can take over from here? You? [[ComicBook/IronMan Tony Stark?]] [[ComicBook/CivilWar Mister Fought-against-Cap-in-the-civil-war,]] [[ComicBook/WorldWarHulk shot-Hulk-into-space-and-caused-World-War-Hulk,]] [[ComicBook/SecretInvasion gave-the-Skrulls-everything-they-needed-to-invade-Earth.]] You're taking over? Come on, give me one good reason why—''

->''"Story of my life. No matter what I try, God's always got a custard pie up His sleeve."''
-->--'''''Georgy Girl''''' (1966)

->''Why does Tsundere-senpai have to suffer so much even though she's such a good person? Is there no god?''
-->-- '''Yu Ishigami''' regarding Maki Shijo, ''Manga/KaguyaSamaLoveIsWar''

->''[[LeaningOnTheFourthWall Why must every 11 minutes of my life be filled with misery? Why?]]''
-->--'''Squidward''', ''WesternAnimation/SpongebobSquarepants''

->''"Story of my life. No matter what I try, God's always got a custard pie up his sleeve."''

--> '''Jerry''' from ''WesternAnimation/RickAndMorty'' in the episode, [[Recap/RickAndMortyS2E9LookWhosPurging Look Who's Purging Now]]

-->--'''Jack Manifold''' in response to Niki being imprisoned on his balcony by [[TheDictatorship the Schlatt administration]], ''LetsPlay/DreamSMP'' [[note]]It's because of his house's close proximity to (L')Manburg and its Podium[[/note]]

-->--'''Jack Manifold''' in response to Niki being imprisoned on his balcony by [[TheDictatorship the Schlatt administration]], ''LetsPlay/DreamSMP''

-->--[[spoiler: '''Lila,''']] to '''Cassel,''' ''[[Literature/TheCurseWorkers White Cat]]''

->"A History of American Farming by Peter Fox: who had a very rough time getting out of bed this morning and didn't eat breakfast and who pinched his left thumb in his gym locker and lost his favorite pencil in the library and whose day got even worse when..."

-->--'''Darren [=MacLennon=]''', [[http://www.rpg.net/reviews/archive/14/14347.phtml review]] of the Literature/{{Wraeththu}} RPG.

-->--''[[http://nodwick.humor.gamespy.com/gamespyarchive/index.php?date=2001-12-05 Nodwick]]''

->"Sometimes, I'm afraid to be happy, because whenever I get too happy, something bad always happens."

->"Why is it always me?"

->''"But in his experience it was only a matter of time before the normal balance of the universe restored itself and started doing the usual terrible things to him."''

-->--'''Zorne Sepperin''', ''{{VideoGame/Rosenkreuzstilette}}''

->"You know, at this point, I should really just accept that nobody anywhere respects me, shouldn't I?"

->'''[[ComicBook/TheWasp Hank]] [[ComicBook/AntMan Pym]]''': ''You can take over from here? You? [[ComicBook/IronMan Tony Stark?]] [[ComicBook/CivilWar Mister Fought-against-Cap-in-the-civil-war,]] [[ComicBook/WorldWarHulk shot-Hulk-into-space-and-caused-World-War-Hulk,]] [[ComicBook/SecretInvasion gave-the-Skrulls-everything-they-needed-to-invade-Earth.]] You're taking over? Come on, give me one good reason why—''
->'''ComicBook/IronMan''': ''[[TwoWordsAddedEmphasis Three words.]] [[PunctuatedForEmphasis You're. Hank. Pym.]]''

-->--'''[[VisualNovel/PhoenixWrightAceAttorney Phoenix Wright]]''', Franchise/AceAttorney

->This planet hates me.

-->-- '''Batbilig Chinzorig''' [[note]]The card has the person who drew it to make a funny face to the other players to try to make them laugh or else pay the penalty.[[/note]], Quelf

->To say [[FailureHero our heroes]] are cursed would be underselling it. At least curses usually have a chance of being ''lifted'' in some way.

->Why does Tsundere-senpai have to suffer so much even though she's such a good person? Is there no god?

-->--''WesternAnimation/CourageTheCowardlyDog'', bemoaning the perilous situations he's always put through to save Muriel.

->You have a real talent of getting your ass kicked.
-->--[[spoiler: '''Lila,''']] to ''Cassel,''' ''[[Literature/TheCurseWorkers White Cat]]''

->It occurred to [[VirtualGhost Rimmer]] that nothing really nice had happened to him since his death. You'd have thought that dying in itself would be bad enough. You'd have thought a person had the right to expect that death would be just about the lowest point in that person's experience.But no. Since he'd expired, [[FromBadToWorse things had got progressively worse]].

And if you were married... you'd be pushed around by your wife!"''

-->-- '''Sazh Katzroy''', ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyXIII''

-->-- ''Film/LooneyTunesBackInAction''

->'''Shirley:''' Guys! Did you know that I actually have a civil against the bitch who stole my husband?

->'''Jeff:''' Shirley, don't sue a stripper.\\

'''Jeff:''' Because she's a stripper. ''Life'' sued her and she lost.

'''WesternAnimation/DaffyDuck:''' Flattered though I may be, ''flattened'' I will not, in order for you to get the laughs. It's all "Hoo-hoo! Yuk-yuk!" and then "[[SayingSoundEffectsOutLoud BAM, WHAM, BAFF!]]"\\

-->--'''Dr. Facilier''' to '''Lawrence''', ''WesternAnimation/ThePrincessAndTheFrog''

-->--'''Cegorach''' to '''Magnus the Red''', ''WebAnimation/IfTheEmperorHadATextToSpeechDevice''

-->'''Krillin''', ''WebVideo/DragonballZAbridged''[[note]]Going by the Krillin Owned Counter he'd have 3 dollars and 90 cents, so he' ''still'' be in debt.[[/note]]

-->'''Krillin''', ''WebVideo/DragonballZAbridged''

->''Your very existence if grounds for a whole genre of jokes.''
-->--'''Cegorach''' to '''Magnus the Red''', ''WebVideo/IfTheEmperorHadATextToSpeechDevice''

-->--''WesternAnimation/CourageTheCowardlyDog'', bemoaning the perilous situations he's always put through to save Muriel.

->''"Thundering typhoons! Everything happens to me!"''
-->--'''Captain Haddock''', [[https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Franchise/Tintin The Adventures of Tintin]]

-->--''Discworld/TheColourOfMagic'' (describing Rincewind, of course)

-->--''Literature/RedDwarf: Backwards''

-->--''Literature/{{Colony}}''

-->-- ''VideoGame/SaintsRowTheThird'' opening text crawl

-->--''VideoGame/SaintsRowTheThird'' opening text crawl

-->''VideoGame/SaintsRowTheThird'' opening text crawl

-->-- '''Yu Ishigami''' regarding Maki Shijo, ''Manga/KaguyaSamaLoveIsWar''