History Main / StupidestThingIveEverHeard

* In ''StarTrekIVTheVoyageHome'', Chekov has traveled back in time to the 20th century and been captured by the Feds. But they don't quite know what to make of him:

* In ''Film/JimmyNeutronBoyGenius'', this exchange occurs after Sheen relates the current situation to an episode of Ultra Lord:

* In ''Series/TheCosbyShow'', son Theo is getting bad grades - when Cliff confronts him about it, he goes into a spiel about how he can't get any better and will just have to be accepted the way he is. The anticipated 'Awww' hug scene is averted when Cliff tells him "Son...that's the DUMBEST thing I ever heard in my entire LIFE! No WONDER you get D's in everything!" He stays on his case, determined to get him to buckle down.

* ''{{Spaceballs}}'':

'''Timon:''' "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard, "maybe he'll be on..." Hey, I got it! What if he's on ''our'' side?"

'''Timon:''' That's the stupidest thing I ever heard, "maybe he'll be on..." Hey, I got it! What if he's on ''our'' side?

:: Note that this is HypocriticalHumor since Homer delivered ''the exact same line'' to Marge not half an hour earlier in the movie.

:: [[BrickJoke It later turns out that this is, in fact, the combination President Skroob has on his luggage]].

* Said by Yugi in ''WebOriginal/YuGiOhTheAbridgedSeries'' when Tristan said card games will be played on motorbikes.

* WebOriginal/TheAngryVideoGameNerd, when reviewing the godawful "Superman" video game (not [[{{Superman64}} that one]], one for the NES) and realizing that he has to buy a subway ticket [[FridgeLogic when Superman can fly]].
* ''WebOriginal/AtopTheFourthWall''

* ''WebOriginal/TheSpoonyExperiment''

'''Sidney Wang:''' Is stupid. ""(laughing)'' Is stupidest theory I ever heard.

* In ''SamAndMaxHitTheRoad'', after hooking it up so he can do so, Sam proudly declares that he can [[ItMakesSenseInContext control the rotation of a rotating restaurant on top of the world's largest ball of twine via a pair of mounted binoculars]]. Max informs him that this is the most ridiculous thing he's ever heard. It may very well rate pretty high in that category. Even better, since ''Hit The Road'' was made during the dark ages long before Microsoft caught on to the concept of hardware abstraction the UNIX world had years earlier, it had its own audio hardware configuration tool. The sound clip used as a test to make sure your hardware working was Max saying that very line. So yes, this can even be considered a meta-example of sorts.

!!Examples:

[[folder:Anime]]
* In the dub of ''MobileSuitZetaGundam'', Haman says this when Kamille suggests that killing Earthnoids isn't justified.

* Danielle Moonstar uses this against Cyclops early in ''[[NewMutants New X-Men: Academy X]]'', when the latter suggests keeping from their students that the corpse of their recently deceased teacher has been stolen, and that he might return as a brainwashed zombie.
** Not the ExactWords, but in ''Astonishing X-Men'', Kitty Pryde attempts to inspire one of the students with a heartfelt speech about how mutantkind would never want a cure for their mutation. The kid's response, [[JustifiedTrope understandably]], is "Ms Pryde, [[PrecisionFStrike are you fucking retarded?"]]

[[folder:Fanfiction]]

-->'''Harry:''' [Dobby's] apparently gotten it into his head that Hogwarts is a walking death trap and therefore I'm better off with my Muggle relatives and in particular my Muggle uncle who could snap at any time and try and strangle me. Therefore, he sealed the portal to the platform and Ron and I got bored so we decided not to wait for everyone to fix the mess and just fly here.
-->'''Draco:''' That has got to be the stupidest thing I've ever heard.
** And later there's this...
-->'''George:''' Besides, the Slytherin team apparently couldn't find anybody to spy as they showed up in person. And full Quidditch gear.
-->'''Harry:''' Why in the world are they wearing their Quidditch robes to practice in? That has got to be the stupidest thing I've seen all day.
-->'''Fred:''' All day isn't very long, Harry. It can't be more than ten.

[[folder:Film]]
* In ''Film/{{X-Men}}'' after Professor X tells Wolverine several code names such as Storm, Cyclops, Magneto, and Sabretooth.
-->'''Wolverine''': What do they call you? "Wheels"? This is the stupidest thing I've ever heard.
** HypocriticalHumor on his part, since he has a code name of his own.
* In ''DoctorStrangelove'':
-->Well, I've been to one world fair, a picnic, and a rodeo, and that's the stupidest thing I ever heard come over a set of earphones. You sure you got today's codes?
* ''FightClub''
-->'''Guy #1:''' I heard Tyler Durden was born in a mental hospital, and sleeps only one hour a night.
-->'''Guy #2:''' I heard he has full facial reconstructive surgery every three years.
-->'''Narrator:''' ''(deadpan)'' That is the dumbest thing I have ever heard.

-->'''Dark Helmet''': So the combination is... one, two, three, four, five? That's the stupidest combination I've ever heard in my life! The kind of thing an idiot would have on his luggage!
-->([[BrickJoke It later turns out that this is, in fact, the combination President Skroob has on his luggage]])
* From ''DungeonsAndDragons'':

-->'''Sidney Wang''': Very interesting theory, Mr. Charleston. However, leave out one important point.
-->'''Dick Charleston''': What's that?
-->'''Sidney Wang:''' Is stupid. [laughing] Is stupidest theory I ever heard.

-->'''Judy:''' Love means never having to say you're sorry.
-->'''Howard:''' That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard.

* ''[[TheSimpsons The Simpsons Movie]]'':
-->'''Marge Simpson:''' Homer, in every marriage you get one chance to say, "I need you to do this with me."
-->'''Homer Simpson:''' That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard.
** Note that this is HypocriticalHumor since Homer delivered ''the exact same line'' to Marge not half an hour earlier in the movie.
* In the ''JimmyNeutron'' movie, this exchange occurs after Sheen relates the current situation to an episode of Ultra Lord:
-->'''Nick:''' Well, folks, that is just about the stupidest thing I've ever heard!
-->'''Sheen:''' No, this is the stupidest thing you've ever heard! (starts jabbering)

-->'''Veronica Sawyer:''' I'd like to ask you a stupid question.
-->'''Jason Dean:''' There are no stupid questions.
-->'''Veronica:''' Okay. So, aliens land on the Earth and say they're going to blow the whole place up. The same day, you win the lottery. What do you do with the money?
-->(beat)
-->'''J.D.:''' That's the stupidest question I've ever heard.
* In ''StarTrekIV'', Chekov has traveled back in time to the 20th century and been captured by the Feds. But they don't quite know what to make of him:
-->'''Agent #1:''' What do you think?
-->'''Agent #2:''' He's a Russkie.
-->'''Agent #1:''' That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life. Of course he's a Russkie, but he's a retard or something.
* Played for laughs in {{The Lion King}}.
-->'''Pumbaa:'''Maybe he'll be on our side
-->'''Timon:''' That's the stupidest thing I ever heard, 'maybe he'll be on...' Hey, I got it! What if he's on *our* side?

* Used in ''HarryPotterAndTheOrderOfThePhoenix''.
-->'''Sirius:''' Our information from inside the Ministry is that Fudge doesn't want you trained in combat.
-->'''Harry:''' ''Trained in combat?'' What does he think we're doing here, forming some sort of wizard army?
-->'''Sirius:''' That's exactly what he thinks you're doing. Or rather, that's exactly what he's afraid Dumbledore's doing- forming his own private army with which he will be able to take on the Ministry of Magic.
-->'''Ron:''' That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard, including all the stuff that [[{{Cloudcuckoolander}} Luna Lovegood]] comes out with.

[[folder:Live Action TV]]
* Even the mild-mannered Gil Grissom of ''{{CSI}}'' once said this:
-->'''Brass:''' Let me get this straight, Larry. An old man refuses to let you steal his money, so you jack a Hummer and try to run over his taco stand?
-->'''Lawrence Lafontaine:''' Maybe.
-->'''Grissom:''' I think this is the dumbest thing we've ever heard.
** [[CrowningMomentOfFunny Grissom's tone while saying the line is quite possibly the closest thing to Facepalming in vocal form]].
* From the ''{{Cheers}}'' episode "Little Sister, Don't Cha"
-->'''Sam Malone:''' She can do whatever she wants with her sex life. It's in the Bill of Rights.
-->'''Diane Chambers:''' Where is it in the Bill of Rights?
-->'''Sam Malone:''' Well, you know, the part about the right to assemble and bear arms.
-->'''Diane Chambers:''' That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

-->'''Rick:''' I would like to propose a toast... to the luckiest couple in Saigon. Me and TC. [Magnum laughs]
-->'''Rick:''' No I mean it, we are the last of the bachelors. Everyone else we know is married.
-->'''TC:''' Orville, I've heard you say some dumb things in my life, but that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard you say.
* MorkAndMindy
-->'''Exidor:''' Look, business is a little slow but we're gonna have our two-for-one sale. Buy two, get one. Who could resist that?
-->'''Mindy:''' That is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.
* In ''TheCosbyShow'', son Theo is getting bad grades - when Cliff confronts him about it, he goes into a spiel about how he can't get any better and will just have to be accepted the way he is. The anticipated 'Awww' hug scene is averted when Cliff tells him "Son...that's the DUMBEST thing I ever heard in my entire LIFE! No WONDER you get D's in everything!" He stays on his case, determined to get him to buckle down.
* ''TheColbertReport'' has an occasional feature called "The Craziest F#@king Thing I've Ever Heard," a parody of Bill O'Reilly's "Most Ridiculous Item of the Day." One example was an event where strongmen pulled trucks by their ear-lobes, prompting Colbert to speculate on the future of "ear-powered" transportation, and the inclusion of "ear-only" traffic lanes.

* In an episode of ''Series/{{House}}'', Thirteen says something profound and House tells her "that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard." As soon as she leaves the room he adds two extra points to her score even though she was already on maximum points.
* Subverted in the ''BuffyTheVampireSlayer'' episode ''Graduation Day:''
-->'''Cordelia''': I personally don't think it's possible to come up with a crazier plan.
-->'''Oz''': We attack the Mayor with hummus.
-->'''Cordelia''': I stand corrected.

-->'''Jill:''' What are you ''doing?''
-->'''Chuck:''' I had a theory that the cure might be able to spread by saliva!
-->'''Jill:''' ...that is the ''stupidest'' thing I have ever heard. [[YouFailBiologyForever No wonder you failed bio]].
* From ''{{Coupling}}'':
-->'''Bartender''': "Have you actually told her that you're gonna marry her?"
-->'''Steve''': "In my own way..."
-->'''Bartender''': "Your own way?"
-->'''Steve''': "She accidentally overheard me saying it on the phone, when I thought I was talking to my ex-girlfriend."
-->'''Bartender''': "No offence, and, of course, it's none of my business, but that could be the worst proposal in human history."
-->'''Sally''': "Steve, you're gonna have to be my husband. Patrick prefers blondes!"
-->'''Bartender''': "I love this bar!"

[[folder:Real Life]]
* During a question and answer segment after a debate about porn and ethics, Ron Jeremy was asked how the pornography industry can continue functioning despite it resulting in things like bestiality and child pornography. Ron Jeremy's response was simply that that was the stupidest question he had ever heard in his life.
* A judge used the Billy Madison line above in his closing words of a case where the man (incompetently) defended himself at his own trial.
* During one townhall meeting, Congressman [[DeadpanSnarker Barney Frank]] interrupted a woman who was comparing a government health care program to Naziism by informing her that it was the stupidest thing he'd ever heard and that the table he was at was capable of more rational comments. Not the people at the table. ''The table''. To realize how absurd the comparison to Naziism is, recall that Barney Frank is both Jewish and gay.
[[/folder]]

* Subverted in Left4Dead2. Coach comes up with an idea to start up a band's pyrotechnics in order to call for a helicopter. After hearing this, Nick drops this line.

* In ''SamAndMaxHitTheRoad'', after hooking it up so he can do so, Sam proudly declares that he can [[ItMakesSenseInContext control the rotation of a rotating restaurant on top of the world's largest ball of twine via a pair of mounted binoculars]]. Max informs him that this is the most ridiculous thing he's ever heard. It may very well rate pretty high in that category.
** Even better, since ''Hit The Road'' was made during the dark ages long before Microsoft caught on to the concept of hardware abstraction the UNIX world had years earlier, it had its own audio hardware configuration tool. The sound clip used as a test to make sure your hardware working was Max saying that very line. So yes, this can even be considered a meta-example of sorts.
* Most of Black Whirlwind's stories in ''JadeEmpire'' allows your main character to respond with this line.
* In ''EscapeFromMonkeyIsland'', Guybrush talks with Ignatius Cheese, who tells him that keeping Ozzie Mandrill out of the Scumm Bar has taken all of his Insult Arm-Wrestling skills. Guybrush comments that "If it weren't for the whole, 'Wife being declared dead' thing, I'd say that was the strangest story I'd heard all week." This gets a CallBack later when Meathook tells him how he taught himself to paint using his hooks and coloured candle wax. Guybrush replies "That's the silliest story I've heard in hours."

* From RedVsBlue episode "Heavy Metal", when Sarge proposes charging the enemy base single file:

* From [[http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0199.html this]] ''Webcomic/TheOrderOfTheStick'':
-->'''Roy''': Well, I would say that's the dumbest thing I've heard all day, but as I've been talking to Elan since morning, it might not even crack the top ten.

* Uttered by a villain in [[http://www.superstupor.com/sust04092008.shtml this]] strip of ''Super Stupor'' in response to another villain warning him about the resident LittleMissBadass and how heroes don't send out kids unless they can kick serious ass. He ignores the warning and promptly gets fried.

* From ''AtopTheFourthWall'' on the ''Comicbook/{{X-Men}}'' story "Holy War":
-->'''Linkara''': This is quite possibly the ''dumbest'' plan I've ever heard in my life, and I've seen someone deciding to make twin clones of Hitler!
** Ironically, he would then say the same thing about the evil plan in ''Future 5'': Dr. Know plans on becoming the smartest and most powerful man on Earth by...convincing everyone to not go to college. Linkara saying this is TemptingFate in its purest form.
* The villain from the 1970s ''CaptainAmerica'' serial get this reaction from [[TheSpoonyExperiment Spoony]] when it's revealed that he wants to nuke Phoenix Arizona to get at the gold repository under the city.
** And again when Wakka in ''FinalFantasyX'' compares the destruction of the Al Bhed's Home to "happy festival fireworks":

* Said by Yugi in ''WebOriginal/YuGiOhTheAbridgedSeries'' when Tristan said card games will be played on motorbikes.
-->'''Yugi:''' THAT is the stupidest thing that has ever come out of your mouth. [[ItWillNeverCatchOn Card games on motorbikes.]] Come on! (Promotional image of [[YuGiOh5Ds Yu-Gi-Oh! 5Ds]] displays)

-->'''Francine:''' If you gave me $5,000 of your bonus, I could start a business selling my muffins.
-->'''Stan Smith:''' ...this is the worst idea I've ever heard.
* From the ''JusticeLeague'' episode "Panic in the Sky"

* ''SouthPark'' as this as a stock line delivered whenever Cartman gets an idea.
** "Cartman Gets an Anal Probe''
-->'''Farmer:''' People's been saying they've been seeing UFO's around the black Army, CIA helicopters and trucks.
-->'''Officer Barbrady:''' That is the silliest thing I've ever heard.

* {{Freakazoid}} gets this opportunity after The Lobe [[JustBetweenYouAndMe tells him all about his plan]] to use a giant cloud to turn people into zombie clowns. Freakazoid scowls, and simply replies "Well, if you don't mind me saying so, ''that is the stupidest plan I've ever heard of!"'' and rants about its ridiculousness until the Lobe is reduced to tears.
** This is almost immediately [[SubvertedTrope subverted]] when, after the Lobe leaves, Freakazoid immediately starts laughing and exclaiming that the plan is a brilliant one.
* ''HeyArnold'': Helga treated everyone to dinner at ''Chez Paris'' and didn't realize until they received the check at the end that her coupon was for ''Chez Pierre'' across the street.
-->'''Phoebe:''' The wrong restaurant?! Well, Helga, I suppose the only thing to do would be to tell the management the truth.
-->''{{beat}}''
-->'''Helga:''' That is the ''stupidest'' idea I have ever heard in my ''entire life!''

* In the ''{{Futurama}}'' episode "The Cyber House Rules", when Leela says that she's getting an eye surgery:
-->'''Zoidberg:''' Wonderful. And while you're under the knife, you could also get an ink pouch to help you escape your enemies.
-->'''The Professor:''' That's the stupidest idea I've ever heard, you imbecile! ''(raises a rolled-up newspaper to hit Zoidberg, Zoidberg sprays ink at his face and runs off)''

[[quoteright:316:http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/clueless_boss_2441.png]]
[[caption-width-right:316:{{Dilbert}}]]

* {{The Angry Video Game Nerd}}, when reviewing the godawful "Superman" video game (not [[{{Superman64}} that one]], one for the NES) and realizing that he has to buy a subway ticket [[FridgeLogic when Superman can fly]].

* ''AmericanDad!'' episode "Finances with Wolves" :

* In an episode of ''{{House}}'', Thirteen says something profound and House tells her "that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard." As soon as she leaves the room he adds two extra points to her score even though she was already on maximum points.

'''Timon:''' That's the stupidest thing I ever heard, 'maybe he'll be on...' Hey, I got it! What if he's on *our* side?

Variations can include "dumbest" "idiotic" "ridiculous" etc., but the same basic message applies.

May be combined with WhoWouldBeStupidEnough. Contrast CrazyEnoughToWork.

* During one townhall meeting, Barney Frank interrupted a woman who was comparing a government health care program to Naziism by informing her that it was the stupidest thing he'd ever heard and that the table he was at was capable of more rational comments. Not the people at the table. ''The table''. To realize how absurd the comparison to Naziism is, recall that Barney Frank is both Jewish and gay.

* During one townhall meeting, Barney Frank interrupted a woman who was comparing a government health care program to Naziism by informing her that it was the stupidest thing he'd ever heard and that the table he was at was capable of more rational comments. Not the people at the table. ''The table''.

[[folder: Anime ]]

[[folder: Comic Books ]]

[[folder: Fanfiction ]]

[[folder: Film ]]

* At the end of the film ''[[{{Ptitlejqs6wzi0}} What's Up, Doc?]]'':

--> '''Marge Simpson:''' Homer, in every marriage you get one chance to say, "I need you to do this with me."
--> '''Homer Simpson:''' That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

--> '''Nick:''' Well, folks, that is just about the stupidest thing I've ever heard!
--> '''Sheen:''' No, this is the stupidest thing you've ever heard! (starts jabbering)

--> '''Veronica Sawyer:''' I'd like to ask you a stupid question.
--> '''Jason Dean:''' There are no stupid questions.
--> '''Veronica:''' Okay. So, aliens land on the Earth and say they're going to blow the whole place up. The same day, you win the lottery. What do you do with the money?
--> (beat)
--> '''J.D.:''' That's the stupidest question I've ever heard.

--> '''Agent #1:''' What do you think?
--> '''Agent #2:''' He's a Russkie.
--> '''Agent #1:''' That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life. Of course he's a Russkie, but he's a retard or something.

[[folder: Literature ]]

[[folder: Live Action TV ]]

[[folder: Real Life ]]

[[folder: Video Games ]]

[[folder: Web Animation ]]

[[folder: Web Comics ]]

[[folder: Web Original ]]

--->"...Happy... Festival... Fireworks!? That could be the STUPIDEST, MOST INSENSITIVE, IDIOT THING any character has ever said in ANY WORK OF FICTION! That's like trying to cheer people up after Hurricane Katrina.... by saying it's a giant happy waterpark!"

--> '''Yugi:''' THAT is the stupidest thing that has ever come out of your mouth. [[ItWillNeverCatchOn Card games on motorbikes.]] Come on! (Promotional image of [[YuGiOh5Ds Yu-Gi-Oh! 5Ds]] displays)

[[folder: Western Animation ]]

--->'''Farmer:''' People's been saying they've been seeing UFO's around the black Army, CIA helicopters and trucks.
--->'''Officer Barbrady:''' That is the silliest thing I've ever heard.

---> '''Mayor:''' [[MythologyGag An animated Christmas card?]] [[TakeThatUs Kids, that just might be the dumbest idea I've ever heard, ever!]]

** There is at least one instance of Kyle saying something along the lines of "Cartman, that's the stupidest thing you've ever said ... this week."

->''"Mr. Madison, what you've just said... Is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point, in your rambling, incoherent response, were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul."''

[[AC:{{Anime}}]]

[[AC:{{ComicBooks}}]]

[[AC:{{Fanfiction}}]]

[[AC:{{Film}}]]

* In ''DoctorStrangelove'':

-->'''Dark Helmet''': So the combination is... one, two, three, four, five? That's the stupidest combination I've ever heard in my life! The kind of thing an idiot would have on his luggage!

-->'''Snails:''' I got a new name for "dumb": "Ridley"! This is the Ridleyest thing I've ever heard!
* ''MurderByDeath'' has Sidney Wang after Dick Charleston presents the theory that Lionel Twain murdered himself.

-->'''Sidney Wang:''' Is stupid. [laughing] Is stupidest theory I ever heard.

--> '''Homer Simpson:''' That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

[[AC:{{Literature}}]]

[[AC:LiveActionTV]]

** [[CrowningMomentOfFunny Grissom's tone while saying the line is quite possibly the closest thing to Facepalming in vocal form]].
* From the ''{{Cheers}}'' episode "Little Sister, Don't Cha"

-->'''Diane Chambers:''' That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

* From the ''Full Frys'' episode "Inga delikatesser"

* MorkAndMindy

-->'''Mindy:''' That is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

[[AC:RealLife]]
* During a question and answer segment after a debate about porn and ethics, Ron Jeremy was asked how the pornography industry can continue functioning despite it resulting in things like bestiality and child pornography. Ron Jeremy's response was simply that that was the stupidest question he had ever heard in his life.

[[AC:VideoGames]]

* Subverted in Left4Dead2. Coach comes up with an idea to start up a band's pyrotechnics in order to call for a helicopter. After hearing this, Nick drops this line.

[[AC:WebAnimation]]

[[AC:WebComics]]

[[AC:WebOriginal]]

--->"...Happy... Festival... Fireworks!? That could be the STUPIDEST, MOST INSENSITIVE, IDIOT THING any character has ever said in ANY WORK OF FICTION! That's like trying to cheer people up after Hurricane Katrina.... by saying it's a giant happy waterpark!"

[[AC:WesternAnimation]]

* From the ''JusticeLeague'' episode "Panic in the Sky"

** "Cartman Gets an Anal Probe''

----

[[redirect:{{ptitleodw1s7zo}}]]